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My friend Kit Slater is new but she would love an excuse to get blazed. Those freaking artists and their hippie drugs.

There's some weird cross between "I wouldn't want to be a part of any club that would have me" and wanting to be able to trademark The Infamous Elsi Dawson in the same way sybian seems to manage. Really messing with my daddy issues here...

^^^ ddcanz nailing heads. My favourite reviews say: -I booked an appointment via (website booking/email/text/call/twitter). -SP was professional in making a booking -Arrived to an incall that had all that incall shit required for an incall (shower, towels, yada yada). -SP was...

I'd really hoped this would be the story of when that guy handed you ten bucks and took your hat.

ITT: Guys splitting hairs on a dime piece on her first day. Mistermetro, I give you a blowie.

If someone's trying to walk into sybian's account, I usually have some luck with alternating between I-likeElsisBoobs, Elsi-DawsonTitties69, and ElsiJust1MorePicPlease

It took me a long time and a lot of beers to get to be able to laugh at that session.

You wanna take me for beers, I'll tell you a similar story from the perspective of the hooker. He completely forgot about the catheter.

Knowing a client's age helps me get a gameplan set up for the session. Older clients generally are looking for something more GFE and intimate, with a single shot or not, so I gear down a bit and harness a bit more emotional energy. Clients my age might get two out with a brief interlude for...

Twenty-three.

Pretty Priya fits that curvy bill! I've had the pleasure of her lips and her bod in my bed and... Phew. Yeah. Ask when she's free to come over from the island next.

You must be in red to advertise services, Sub-Slut. And a beaded curtain in an open bathroom stall isn't technically a hole, and very rarely looks glorious.

*slow clap*

My favourite is "looking for a non-pro with good reviews."

I had a FB who was Dom-y and he had a massage table. Managed to get a little rub down, tied to it, rough stuff happened, and aftercare cuddles together on top of the table. It was like a rock. Consider that line stolen.

My mum had bedbugs at her place and couldn't figure out how (no recent travel, no second hand furniture, no visitors to that house). She called pest control to get it dealt with and they ask if she reads a lot. My mum and my sister visit the library so often that they leave notes for each...

I see you being a flatterfly again, Frank. I'll put a blowie aside for you. ;)

Flatterfly. I'll save a blowie here for you and your praise.

Why can't anyone live in my spy fantasy universe with me. Fine. Alt theory-- Ballhawk, you were probably just glowing from your session. The shutterbug took your pictures so that he could go on a different forum to post them to a bunch of armchair dermatologists and ask how to get such a...

Yeah, we're dealing with a client base that manages to read the ad 10% of the time. I don't know how well a two-tiered yelp screening system would work. Correct = correct.