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This is the third case I've heard of from people I've had my mouth on. More from people I'd like to have my mouth on. Do your research, people. Cross-reference and shop with your bigger head. Also, Priya, darling. Don't hold your breath for Leolist to do anything about it.

needs more woooood.

I think we're speaking the same language, I agree with all of your points. We could just add mattresses, but then we wouldn't get to fuck with the tool box. If it's just mattresses, it's a safety demo. If we get to use the power tools, it's a hobby. Also, I don't know what spinners drink...

Oh fuck-- we could do a two foot retaining wall on a 45° angle, with a railing around the top edge for tricks and jumps and ... things. Put some basic framing on the furthest edge with diagonal supports and some lag bolts because I have those lying around and I wanna use the drill press. Vinyl...

I can't have you meet him though, he has hair.

I'm good at doing most of my handy work, but grouting is just too brain-numbing and tedious. Got buddy to do it instead. And if I had you here, I'd still get him to do it so we could fuck off and go fill some other cracks instead. You wear the spurs, I'll wear the skirt.

I got my shower regrouted (after putting it off for several months)!

What's a truck? If you have issues remembering to breathe when you climb stairs, I don't think we should meet. I'd hate for you to pass out with my mounds bouncing in your face. What do they call that? Cowgirl? ;)

I'm not a cowboy, I don't do my own driving. But when I do, I drink Dos Équis.

Sorry, I'm ranting on the road. Stop the presses, Elsi's à multi-tasking asshole.

And yet sometimes there's an off-putting booty smell. Even though they had the whole hour to take a surprise dump, do an enema, set up the incall, do make-up, hair, get into lingerie and brace for the warmth of your generosity. I'm sure they're all done up and ready, waiting for you, all day...

She told you you're bad at oral? Ne parlez pas. ;)

An hour out is insufficient notice to book happy Greek if it wasn't already on the schedule that day. I'd say more, but I'm afraid that showing you behind that curtain would make me an enema of the state.

Clem is such a doll. ;)

I take you to Old Spag, we get unlimited refills on our soda. That's what friends like.

I had the best week and I have the coolest friends and I made a reso at the Old Spaghetti Factory. I win.

And to drive home from the other side of the equation, I don't advertise when I'm taking time off because there are too many strangers who know my address and I don't need people to know when my place is abandoned. Take a deep breath. You were gone for two weeks once, right? ;) It's all...

My place is essentially an understaffed brothel. I need a drink.

I don't feel sad when I lose a regular girl. I feel sad when I lose an expectional girl.

I love me a good fleet of podcasts, but I don't like the "just a room full of people talking over each other" model. They seem to have a quantity-over-quality approach that really makes me appreciate the writing, editing, and sound design of more polished (or at-all polished) pods. Marc Maron...