I was almost being caught by my ex gf a long time ago. She just told my gf at that time she knew me as a friend. Nobody expects any sp to lie for them. But a few months later i decided being in a relationship wasnt for me. But at that time i was just glad the sp didnt say too much. Not sure the avrg wife or gf can handle their guy sees escorts on the side or their man is a dirty liar.
A call from my clients' wife ...today ...my heart hurts
- Thread starter JessicaPrabbit
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Because, as she's already stated, the circumstances may differ if this happens again.
For example, she may not know that the client has already been caught by his SO.
{Don't ask me how she knows, as this is her claim}.
As for right and wrong, tell me what she did wrong. I already know what she did right.
oh hunsperger why don't you go play with kids your age and get over yourself..
I thought you'd actually come back to perb with a better attitude and a bit more maturity.. it was very short lived.
Please stop making empty headed assumptions about people's "concerns". When did I say it was my "biggest concern" that one less married man would see me? I didn't. So maybe you should start writing fiction because that's where your active imagination would be useful. If that was my biggest concern, don't worry I would have said so.
Grow up and get a life. I've got no patience for your mean spirited, always hateful, bitter and rude crap. Go away.
Right by her client?
I still don't think it's her place to get involved with his business. And how does she know the lady knows? Most people will usually pretend they know something so the other person will confirm it for them. And if she knew, why would she be calling JPR at all? Just to hear the sound of her voice?
Spermie, JPR did not give the lady closure. She gave her confirmation. Closure can only come from the person who has betrayed you, your husband.. not from the escort who confirmed it for you (even if you already knew it).
Obviously we'll all have to agree to disagree. I just think it is not our place to divulge this kind of information or to discuss our clients and certainly not our place to get involved in their personal lives or their private matters - certainly not their marital private matters.
If the lady had been a friend of hers, or the gentlemen not a client, in other words if this had happened in her personal life, then I think I could agree that it would have been the right thing to do. Not as an sp. That's IMHO and it's fine if you don't agree.
Just curious.. Are either of you (Lenny & Spermie) married?
Wow don't I wish I had read this thread earlier so I wouldn't have just plowed through 100+ posts to be updated. I admit the SO confrontation scenario has never crossed my mind so I'm glad Jessica shared her experience and don't think you deserved some of the tactless and vindictive comments that were directed at you. This just confirms my decision to correspond only by email and only answer expected calls prior to an appointment.
Coming from a woman, if a suspicious number is found, it's easy enough to google it and 99% of these women's numbers are going to pop up from an ad or review (what goes on the internet STAYS on the internet), and you are majorly F*CK'D up the backdoor without a bottle of lube, regardless of what story the SP has concocted. It will not matter one iota, unless your married to a woman who's mantra is 'ignorance is bliss'. Having a conversation with a SO is the LAST thing I would want to do, but either way men, you are about to be in for a very rough night, and not in a good way.
I highly doubt any of you could lie yourselves out of this situation even if the SP does hang up the phone, so whether we confirm or not is moot. But it is beyond me why anyone would ever want to be involved as the third party, talk about messy!
I've had clients and SPs alike share information with me about others in the industry, whether asked for or not, so some people just don't understand discretion. Fair warning to all to be responsible for covering your own ass, don't expect someone else to do it for you. Establishing a connection with a favourite client is one of the best things about doing this and sometimes a good appointment will be the highlight of my day, but I never divulge details about my personal life nor do I ask for it from my clients. If he chooses to discuss this, it's his perogative. I really hope that you are all selective about which SPs you choose to have these intimate relationships with. As evidenced on this board, we all have our own individual personalities, priorities and ethics.
Coming from a woman, if a suspicious number is found, it's easy enough to google it and 99% of these women's numbers are going to pop up from an ad or review (what goes on the internet STAYS on the internet), and you are majorly F*CK'D up the backdoor without a bottle of lube, regardless of what story the SP has concocted. It will not matter one iota, unless your married to a woman who's mantra is 'ignorance is bliss'. Having a conversation with a SO is the LAST thing I would want to do, but either way men, you are about to be in for a very rough night, and not in a good way.
I highly doubt any of you could lie yourselves out of this situation even if the SP does hang up the phone, so whether we confirm or not is moot. But it is beyond me why anyone would ever want to be involved as the third party, talk about messy! I've had clients and SPs alike share information with me about others in the industry, whether asked for or not, so some people just don't understand discretion. Fair warning to all to be responsible for covering your own ass, don't expect someone else to do it for you. Establishing a connection with a favourite client is one of the best things about doing this and sometimes a good appointment will be the highlight of my day, but I never divulge details about my personal life nor do I ask for it from my clients. If he chooses to discuss this, it's his perogative. I really hope that you are all selective about which SPs you choose to have these intimate relationships with. As evidenced on this board, we all have our own individual personalities, priorities and ethics.
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If I was seeing an SP, or any woman behind an SO's back I wouldn't expect anyone to lie for me if I was stupid enough to leave tracks.
My bad, my responsibility.
My bad, my responsibility.
If the guy was seeing her on a regular basis how stupid was he to not be able to memorize her number?
He may have wanted to get caught to bring things to a head.
He may have wanted to get caught to bring things to a head.
Thank you Jessica for being brave enough to post this thread.
Being caught in the 'headlights' is a pretty startling experience and it serves as a reminder for all of us to be on our guard..thanks to this thread I have already crafted my response to an emergency situation, such as the one you were in, and I have practiced it out loud.
We would all do well to remember that discretion is a two way street...it is difficult for an sp to maintain her end of it if the client is wearing the details on his shirt sleeve.
He was paying for her discretion but chose to leave evidence in the first place his wife would look if she was suspicious, leaving Jessica open to, not only the situation that occurred, but, also the possibility of being 'outed' by being drawn into their marital problems. It would only have taken a detective to match the photo on the phone to Jessica...even without the phone call....the internet is a marvel.
Are you a home wrecker? No...the wife already knows he is unfaithful, that is why she looked for proof....she needed the proof to move on...he is probably done with the marriage too, but, unwilling to let go....been there...made the phone call...and left.
By opening this topic to debate we are able to forearm ourselves eh? Not a bad thing..
Being caught in the 'headlights' is a pretty startling experience and it serves as a reminder for all of us to be on our guard..thanks to this thread I have already crafted my response to an emergency situation, such as the one you were in, and I have practiced it out loud.
We would all do well to remember that discretion is a two way street...it is difficult for an sp to maintain her end of it if the client is wearing the details on his shirt sleeve.
He was paying for her discretion but chose to leave evidence in the first place his wife would look if she was suspicious, leaving Jessica open to, not only the situation that occurred, but, also the possibility of being 'outed' by being drawn into their marital problems. It would only have taken a detective to match the photo on the phone to Jessica...even without the phone call....the internet is a marvel.
Are you a home wrecker? No...the wife already knows he is unfaithful, that is why she looked for proof....she needed the proof to move on...he is probably done with the marriage too, but, unwilling to let go....been there...made the phone call...and left.
By opening this topic to debate we are able to forearm ourselves eh? Not a bad thing..
We can argue all we want about this folks. But in the end it all comes down to 1 Simple Fact: DISCRETION IS GOOD FOR BUSINESS!!!
Discretion is the oil that keeps this lucrative little industry running. SPs expect discretion from pooners and pooners expect discretion from SPs. Discretion is born of mutual repect for one another!
It's worked for thousands of years. Problems have always arisen for this business when the "discretion" rule was broken by one or both parties.
In this case I believe Jessica's client broke the rule by leaving her photo and phone number on his phone. He put Jessica in a very difficult position. I think Jessica exacerbated the problem by not simply hanging up or telling the wife she had a wrong number.
The ultimate responsibility though, rests with the client. He made the first mistake. That usually leads to another and another and another...
This thread has been a very good little "Reality Check" for a lot of us.
This thread has probably hurt you more than anyone, Jessica but it's certainly been a useful topic to discuss. You probably wish you hadn't posted it now. Your honesty here has hurt you, I hope not too badly!!!
Discretion is the oil that keeps this lucrative little industry running. SPs expect discretion from pooners and pooners expect discretion from SPs. Discretion is born of mutual repect for one another!
It's worked for thousands of years. Problems have always arisen for this business when the "discretion" rule was broken by one or both parties.
In this case I believe Jessica's client broke the rule by leaving her photo and phone number on his phone. He put Jessica in a very difficult position. I think Jessica exacerbated the problem by not simply hanging up or telling the wife she had a wrong number.
The ultimate responsibility though, rests with the client. He made the first mistake. That usually leads to another and another and another...
This thread has been a very good little "Reality Check" for a lot of us.
This thread has probably hurt you more than anyone, Jessica but it's certainly been a useful topic to discuss. You probably wish you hadn't posted it now. Your honesty here has hurt you, I hope not too badly!!!
I am glad you are back to being a dick...your charming personality was nauseating
Really? You're NOT married? Hmm. I'm shocked indeed.
You're a bit askew on your perception of the fact that a RULE OF PROFESSIONAL ETHICS exists in ....how did you state it? ...oh yes, "A Whore Review Board".
I guess it's time for you to be surprised because this evening I saw 4 regular clients, all of whom knew of this thread, two had booked days prior, two booked late this afternoon and in addition I had two new clients. Is that a look of surprise on your face? It shouldn't be because it's true that some people admire honesty, you are not one of those people and I'm ok with that.
"If I were her I would be changing my phone number asap and moving ..." Wow. 43 years living in one city and I'm to move because if you were me it would be your idea of a way out? I don't run nor hide from anything, especially when the fact remains that this particular client and his wife have both indicated clearly to me that I was not the problem.
As for the career change ...I'm two years from retiring so it would seem a bit foolish to jump ship just because the sea picks up a bit and might turn into a storm. I'm not that easily frightened, it appears you would be, but thank goodness I'm not you and you are not me.
Doctor, lawyer, school, work is not allowed to discuss client's information without written consent from the client.
So, I know this person A. Can I just call this person A's lawyer/doctor/accountant and ask for information about person A? I think not. I think the lawyer/doctor/accountant is not even allowed to discuss client's personal info with client's spouse without consent from the client.
What if I told this lawyer/doctor/accountant that I have proof that person A is your client, I know your business address, I even have access to some of the work you've done for this person A. So, give me more information about this client A of yours. Is this lawyer/doctor/accountant now free to give out information about client A simply because the person asking question already has some information? I think not.
I think same confidentiality is expected from an SP too. SP is in a position of trust and is not to disclose any information about client without client's consent. If prostitution was truly legal (like doctor/lawyer/accounting professions), I am guessing that same (strict) confidentiality laws will apply to this business as well. In other professions, if you disclose/discuss/confirm information without consent, you are breaching the trust placed in you and are probably going to be legally liable for damages.
So, I know this person A. Can I just call this person A's lawyer/doctor/accountant and ask for information about person A? I think not. I think the lawyer/doctor/accountant is not even allowed to discuss client's personal info with client's spouse without consent from the client.
What if I told this lawyer/doctor/accountant that I have proof that person A is your client, I know your business address, I even have access to some of the work you've done for this person A. So, give me more information about this client A of yours. Is this lawyer/doctor/accountant now free to give out information about client A simply because the person asking question already has some information? I think not.
I think same confidentiality is expected from an SP too. SP is in a position of trust and is not to disclose any information about client without client's consent. If prostitution was truly legal (like doctor/lawyer/accounting professions), I am guessing that same (strict) confidentiality laws will apply to this business as well. In other professions, if you disclose/discuss/confirm information without consent, you are breaching the trust placed in you and are probably going to be legally liable for damages.
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The caller was most certainly his wife and I knew that immediately as a result of extremely intimate information that I asked her to clarify for me that only a wife, a lover or an SP would know ...ya know?
This person's call did not generate a phone number on my screen. What appeared on my screen in the fog of deep sleep was a company name. It was a company name that I am familiar with in Edmonton. It was a call from a place that could be spoofed I suppose but at the time that thought never entered my mind. Was it possible that I was speaking to a PI, Law enforcement, reporter etc ? Sure, as likely as I was speaking to the wife or the Easter Bunny I guess.
I did not confirm anything for her. She presented me with all the facts that were required to let me know she knew everything. Just because we spoke for 20 minutes does not mean I told her anything about what I may or may not have done with anyone including her husband ...in fact I did not. Not at all. I believe my original post says that I explained the reality in difference between SO's and SP's ...I, at no time indicated to her that he and I had any type of relationship whether it be good, bad, sexual, playful, card games or anything else for that matter. THAT WAS NOT WHAT SHE WAS CALLING TO FIND OUT.
She never asked me if I had sex with him ...she had already come to that logical conclusion by way of information that she had seen on my website which she was looking at when she called ...by also having seen a photo from my website on his phone attached to my number and my work name ...go ahead Google Jessicaprabbit ...see if it's rocket science to find out what I do.
So many assumptions as if anyone of you who are calling me down know anything about what happened. He NEVER TOOK A PHOTO OF ME. Not with a camera, not with a phone. You see, if you right click an image online and then 'save as' ...and then send the image to your phone ...really? Do I really need to explain this?
So for all of you who are going to begin the questioning again, perhaps insisting on receiving an answer from me which I can not provide ...do not bother asking me why she called to confirm what she already knew. How should I know? Why do any of us do anything irrational when we are hurt or think we might be in a situation as uncomfortable as this. Why did she call me? What did we talk about? Why did I talk to her? I've tried and tried and tried to explain to you that she was seeking ONE SPECIFIC PIECE OF INFORMATION. Within seconds of me answering my phone she gave me a great deal of information to process. Gawd knows how long she had to prepare to make the call (I'm not saying she ever would have been prepared in the sense of comfort) ...she had said everything ...BAM ... as I was still trying to sit up in my bed.
Another thing, please stop saying that I'm insisting I did the right thing or that I've not acknowledged I did the wrong thing. I haven't said either I don't think(?) I am trying to say that every single situation in life generates a unique set of circumstances and given the detailed specifics of this situation I did what I felt was best in the time allotted to me to do so.
I'm learning a lot by way of having posted this situation. I'm glad I did.
The reality is that this topic was enough to spark an incredible cascade of emotion in the likes I could not have fathomed and as much as I wish to continue reading beyond alinburnaby's reply, my eyes are tired and so is my mind. I'm going to sleep, which I can do quite peacefully knowing I've done the BEST thing possible under the circumstances (I didn't say RIGHT ...I said BEST). I will continue from here tomorrow.
Thank you for continuing to help educate one another.
You as a husband are in a position of trust and while actively betraying that trust you still expect "unconditionally" that a lady with whom you have not signed a nuptial agreement alongside will adhere to your wishes with the trust your wife deserves which you are not giving? Yikes ...there's some internal conflict I think you need to address ...my opinion.
a. I am not married.
b. Two wrongs don't make one right. They make 'two' wrongs. The fact that your client betrayed somebody else doesn't make your betrayal of your client any more acceptable. It's like lawyer/doctor/accountant saying "judge, I disclosed information about my client without consent because my client also breached someone else's trust". The lawyer/doctor/accountant will still be found guilty.
By this logic, your doctor/account/lawyer/school/previous employers/government/social networks/revenue agency should be able to post all your private information because you ALSO breached someone else's trust. Your protest to this kind of disclosure should be seen as 'internal conflict'. After all, you breached someone's trust so you can't expect others to honor your trust specially when they haven't signed any explicit non disclosure agreement with you.
c. You are right. You didn't sign any nuptial agreement or any kind of non-disclosure agreement. In fact, neither are lawyers/doctors/accountants required to sign an explicit confidentiality agreement. It's part of their professional charter or whatever. When they breach those guidelines, their license is taken away and they can also be prosecuted for criminal/civil damages. And that's what I was getting at: if this was a perfectly legalized and legitimate profession, as is being a lawyer/doctor/accountant, I expect the same confidentiality laws would have applied to you as the ones that apply to lawyer/doctors/accountants. But since this is not the case, you can essentially 'out' or even 'blackmail' your clients and your client won't have any legal protection. Your client won't be able to sue you for disclosing information without consent. Your license, per se, won't be taken away. Generally speaking, though, people who engage in this business (whether as an SP or as a client) expect same level of confidentiality. There just is no to very limited legal framework/protection available to them in case either party breaches trust.
d. Your repeated reference to the fact that the husband betrayed his wife's trust make it seem like you believe the husband deserved to be caught/outted because he was betraying his wife's trust. If that's your moral standpoint and justification for your behavior, I don't see how you've done any better. It's not like you only accept un-married men as your clients. You accept clients regardless of mairtal status. You faciliate this act of 'wife betrayal' yourself. You have admitted to keeping in touch with your clients, and clients sharing pictures of their families and kids with you and yet you have continued to see those clients, you've actively faciliated this act. You also betray trust of your clients by disclosing information about them without their consent. I don't see how you have done any better.
e. From all the posts/articles I have read, it seems to me that people who take part in this don't actually think they are doing anything wrong by participating in this activity. They acknowledge that society generally looks down at this activity but they also 'wish' that this activity was more socially acceptable. They wish that there was no negative stigma attached to this activity. They wish tha providing and receiving such services was perfectly legal and legitimate. In that sense, both the clients/SPs are like minded. So, when husband betrayed his wife, he was probably under the impression that he was doing this with a like minded person who understands that there is nothing degrading or wrong about this but the current society still looks down at it and so it's probably best to keep it under the radar, among like minded group of people. By outing your client, it seems like you yourself look down and doubt legitimacy of your profession and you don't think/hope/wish your professional was more socially acceptable. You seem to believe since your client was participating in a degrading activity, breaching trust of his wife, your client deserved to be outted.
You might as well go and blackmail your clients since you haven't signed any nupital agreement and your clients are betraying their SO's trust. If they expect any confidentiality from you, it's just an 'internal conflict'. Just my $0.02.
Finally, I've nothing more to say or add. I won't comment on this thread further. Feel free to disagree and justify your so called honesty.
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wow, you fuk 6different guys in one evening and you are offended by the term WHORE......
AND ,,,,stop patting yourself on the back for being honest , your not honest , your stupid and dangerous.
sorry , just being honest here.
Magic Mystery, all that you write about professionals is true but professionals have a board which they must comply with as they are members of a self-regulating profession. These professions also have stringent qualifications which one must comply with in order to become and remain a member. Comparing this with prostitution is nonsense. There is no "Professional Whore Board".
Wow I can not believe some of what I am reading ...again I wish I knew how to quote...
JPR I can not believe some of your responses ..you are a mature woman ...you have presented yourself well ...you seem to know about the industry and you networked yourself with some pretty top notch people who could also be dragged into this.....
We are service providers and when you choose to enter this industry who do you think the majority of your clients where going to be ... As I mentioned in a previous page from the start you should disclose that you do not see married men without a note from their wives and if they do not provide that then they should be aware that if they are ever careless( as we all can be) you will disclose any information required...
I HAVE received calls from S/O and my only response was hmmm he must of dialed the wrong number....how did she know the picture on his phone was actually you...did she see you in person?????
Our clients visit these boards because they are SUPPOSE to be a discrete /safe avenue to seek what they are missing/craving ...If discretion was not needed we would use our own names and so on... ....The fact that it was a board member bugs me even more .....Your safety and honesty could of put alot more ladies in Jeopardy ....do you understand what I am saying....
If a pooner was to out an SP what would happen....we can all be careless at times does that justify your actions where you on web cam when she called .....all I can do is shake my head....
VK
JPR I can not believe some of your responses ..you are a mature woman ...you have presented yourself well ...you seem to know about the industry and you networked yourself with some pretty top notch people who could also be dragged into this.....
We are service providers and when you choose to enter this industry who do you think the majority of your clients where going to be ... As I mentioned in a previous page from the start you should disclose that you do not see married men without a note from their wives and if they do not provide that then they should be aware that if they are ever careless( as we all can be) you will disclose any information required...
I HAVE received calls from S/O and my only response was hmmm he must of dialed the wrong number....how did she know the picture on his phone was actually you...did she see you in person?????
Our clients visit these boards because they are SUPPOSE to be a discrete /safe avenue to seek what they are missing/craving ...If discretion was not needed we would use our own names and so on... ....The fact that it was a board member bugs me even more .....Your safety and honesty could of put alot more ladies in Jeopardy ....do you understand what I am saying....
If a pooner was to out an SP what would happen....we can all be careless at times does that justify your actions where you on web cam when she called .....all I can do is shake my head....
VK
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