Woman with 2 year old child who rejected you 3 years ago

[poorboyv6]

So let's say that 3 years ago you were interested in a woman who unknown to you, was dating a total asshole. You try and chat her up at a party to get to know her, but get some pretty negative vibes from her, and quickly determine she's not interested.

This woman then gets pregnant by this asshole, who is still unknown to you because she is secretive about his father. This guy wants absolutely nothing to do with his child, and misses his birth. Over the course of the next year, they try and make the relationship work, but due to his assholeness, it doesn't work.

This woman then returns to work, and is now very receptive when you talk to her, and informs you in conversation she is single.

Also during this period of time, you end up meeting the father as it turns out he works for the same organization you do, and turns out to be in a supervisory position, but not at your branch. Asshole babysits, but only because he has to.

What would you do?

 

[chilli]

I'd fuk her and then dump her.

It's obvious she's into aholes, so why disappoint her?

 

[overdone]

take up drinking, maybe drugs, less drama

 

[bcneil]

If you like someone and they dont like you.
And then some life event changes their situation, and they now like you.
Stay away.

The best relationships (and I am no expert) should be people who like each other.

 

[poorboyv6]

You're probably right. I'm looking long term and want kids, but maybe this isn't the right one.

 

[CJ Tylers]

Just stay friends. She's looking for a rebound/shoulder to cry on, before she tries to hook up with another "bad boy", or the childs father (again).

 

[jnewton]

Just stay friends. She's looking for a rebound/shoulder to cry on, before she tries to hook up with another "bad boy", or the childs father (again).

^^^^^^^ +1

 

[poorboyv6]

The fact you all work together is just another complication though.. how much do you like this girl???

Not enough to keep remembering that 3 years ago when she had no child she wasn't interested.

 

[TheSpecialist]

I'd fuk her and then dump her.

It's obvious she's into aholes, so why disappoint her?

Ditto. Don't you have any self-respect? Why would you give potential long term interest to anyone that basically shunned you only a few years ago? Hump her and dump her. Don't be a fuckin' door mat. Grow some balls.

Just waiting for all the nice-guys to reply LOL

 

[OriannaXO]

How about a nice girl?

I have met alot women trapped in abusive cycles because of the nature of the environment they grew up in, they didnt emotionally mature fast enough to know they should be treated different perhaps. Maybe after three years and positive influences in her life she gained some self worth to think she deserves the company of partner like poorboy in her life as opposed to an Ahole who treats her like crap and doesn't care to take part in raising a child with positive influences. People make mistakes, everyone deserves forgiveness and a chance to turn over a fresh leaf in my opinion.

 

[joho]

I see many hot girls with total jerks. These girls often realize they made mistakes and look for the guys who are more sincere and care about them. Everybody deserves the second chance.

 

[Ray]

Now she's stuck with someone else's baby, she's looking for another sap to help carry the load. Run.

 

[Tugela]

I see many hot girls with total jerks. These girls often realize they made mistakes and look for the guys who are more sincere and care about them. Everybody deserves the second chance.

You see lots of hot girls with total jerks, but once the jerks are done with them they go and find another total jerk. Women want men that excite them, and those are the bad boys. They also want men who will provide for them, but unfortunately bad boys don't do that in most all cases. So men are all pigs, while the guys who can provide are left lonely because women don't want them.

Men are the same, they want the bad girls, because those excite them. They also want nurturers, but, unfortunately, bad girls don't do that. So all women are bitches, while the girls who can nurture are left lonely because men don't want them.

That is the problem. Everyone wants the bad ones and not the homebodies, and then complain when they don't get the best of both worlds. Well, duh!!

It could be that this woman has had a sea change and has grown up. Three years is a long time at that age. I would suggest having a second look, unless of course it just a bad girl you really want and she isnt that anymore.

 

[TheSpecialist]

I see many hot girls with total jerks. These girls often realize they made mistakes and look for the guys who are more sincere and care about them. Everybody deserves the second chance.

Why? She's not carry-on luggage anymore, she's got a whole cargo plane now dedicated to her excess luggage. Second chances? Do you want to be someone elses sloppy seconds? He coulda been seeing her before kid and the stretch marks. Lesson learned : nice guy routine does NOT work.

Find someone else, move on. Be friendly with her, but I think the "relationship" boat on this one has sailed... unless you get off on paying for someone elses kid.

 

[luvsdaty]

Thats an aweful lot of 'maybe's' Nina,sounds like way too much drama.Lifes to short to waste on drama queens,find someone that likes you in the 1st place dude.

 

[ThisEndUp]

run my friend, run, she is only looking for a daddy, when next bad guy shows up, she will be with him whiles you are babysitter

 

[Unpossible]

Just stay friends. She's looking for a rebound/shoulder to cry on, before she tries to hook up with another "bad boy", or the childs father (again).

Or she learned her lesson and is looking for a chump to help her raise the kid.

 

[ilovejenny]

Bad dad pays child support so maybe you dont have to. Probly she thinks you might be a good dad cuz you were a nice guy and she was into aholes, but now she has a kid so now she values nice guys. So is she interested in you, no and yes. No cuz youre not her type cuz she turned you down before the kid. Yes cuz she needs you because her kid is part of her at least for now. I say get in there and get lots of sex, and figure this out as a first priority above all else: is she really interested in you or not, forget the kid in the equation. If she is, then great. If she is all about getting a good dad for her kid, dump her cuz she'll dump you later or refuse you sex in a long horrible relationship tied into a kid when she figures out you bore her.

 

[J_Bunny]

Maybe the negativity was because you were hitting on her or seemed to be and she was just not accepting advances out of respect for her boyfriend? Would you want a girlfriend that is all flirty with others if you were going out with her.

Let's not be so quick to judge without all the facts people. She could be a fantastic person who happens to have a child....not the worst thing in the world.

Great point that no one else seems to have noted. She was in a relationship. Would you be interested had she of accepted your advances and cheated on her bf?
Furthermore, if this happened 3 years ago and the kid is 2 now, maybe she was already pregnant and wanted to make things work with the baby daddy. Is that so wrong?
Him being an asshole is irrelevant to you and your role in this. It's her issue and unfortunately, some women don't either don't realize their worth or are willing to put up with shit for the sake their child/ren.
Who cares if you two work together? Clearly this asshole doesnt if hes out of the picture.
If you like her and her having a child doesnt bother you, then I think the answer is simple.

I dont know who said "sloppy seconds" but really? Youre on an escort review board.....really? You say it like it's such a bad thing!

 

[island-guy]

Seriously, why on earth would you possibly want to invite this much drama and misery into your own life?

Go see an SP, have a good time and the next day, think about how simple, easy and drama free it was.

Then think about how much drama, misery and grief you would have in and out of the workplace if you didn't stay the heck away from this walking trouble-bomb.

Compare the two and decide what you should do.