Why do people get mad because...

[miss meiko]

Exactly! and well said and Dr. H spoke well too.That's why this thread is valuable Miss meilko (I hope I spelt that right) I believe that the ladies perform a valuable service in society and society should recognize that. BUT if the 'johns' won't themselves respect the women how in hell are we ever going to convince the rest of society???

I agree about the valuable of this occupation. Because of my back ground from nursing, I treat this job similar to my other job from the start. I guess because of that, I attracted many great people who see me more than just a hooker, prostitute, service provider or whatever people want to call me.

I love myself enough to feel good about myself whether I'm going to see my clients who called me from my escort ad or dementic clients from the nursing home. That's more important for me and I believe for most of my friends in this biz, too. Loving yourself!!

 

[georgebushmoron]

When a woman chooses to make a commodity out of sex, or a commodity out of her presence, then she is selling it for money. It's all very simple, most men want to buy the sex. In the meantime, these men are confronted with her personality, so they make efforts to make the experience smooth for her so that his experience is rewarded with good sex. Most men are there for sex. Some are there for other reasons, but these reasons are because they want to buy something they can not have. That SPs on this thread choose to focus on the very small minority of men who are not buying sex from her is sign of the delusion they wish to engage in, I believe because at some deeper level the trade is discordant to them. It would be far more honest to admit that the whole of their experiences is that 90% or more of their "transactions" are purely sexual.

As for those who say that SPs perform a valuable service to society, it is once again something that is trumpeted selfishly but not necessarily true. My SP-GF told me that what she does is perform a valuable service to society. I then reminded her that were it not for people in her trade, her husband of 20 years would not have found it so easy to cheat on her again and again, and run off with one leaving her with kids to take care of. When she was his wife, she would have killed her husband. Now that she is an SP, she excuses married men who see her. Offering sex for money caused her the delusion that made her forget she is helping to damage the very same kinds of relationships she once had which broke up her family and affected her children.

The sex trade is a convenient market to get sex, which enables many men to cheat. If there were few working girls, it would not enable that kind of behaviour when things in a relationship get a little rocky.

Being a john, of course I am part of this equation. Many speak about respect to the SPs, but frankly real respect starts only when there is truth on both sides.

 

[totravel]

The sex trade is a convenient market to get sex, which enables many men to cheat. If there were few working girls, it would not enable that kind of behaviour when things in a relationship get a little rocky.

Being a john, of course I am part of this equation. Many speak about respect to the SPs, but frankly real respect starts only when there is truth on both sides.

Your situation of having an SP-GF is not typical.
This also brings up the question: Is seeing an SP "cheating", or is it something that actually enables relationships that would otherwise collapse to survive (by providing something lacking-NSA-to men who would REALLY cheat on their wives with affairs.)

 

[maxx50]

This is what it is all about.

If this tread had been presented as a documentary on cbc .. I think it would give a better representation of the sex trade business .. then any thing that has been produce so far .. Just a general frank discussion .. on attitudes .. and expectations ..and the truth on how people feel on both side ..and WHY!
. Yes there is an aspect of the sex trade industry miss from here.. the street Sean... which has no defenders

 

[nube]

When a woman chooses to make a commodity out of sex, or a commodity out of her presence, then she is selling it for money. It's all very simple, most men want to buy the sex. In the meantime, these men are confronted with her personality, so they make efforts to make the experience smooth for her so that his experience is rewarded with good sex. Most men are there for sex. Some are there for other reasons, but these reasons are because they want to buy something they can not have. That SPs on this thread choose to focus on the very small minority of men who are not buying sex from her is sign of the delusion they wish to engage in, I believe because at some deeper level the trade is discordant to them. It would be far more honest to admit that the whole of their experiences is that 90% or more of their "transactions" are purely sexual.

As for those who say that SPs perform a valuable service to society, it is once again something that is trumpeted selfishly but not necessarily true. My SP-GF told me that what she does is perform a valuable service to society. I then reminded her that were it not for people in her trade, her husband of 20 years would not have found it so easy to cheat on her again and again, and run off with one leaving her with kids to take care of. When she was his wife, she would have killed her husband. Now that she is an SP, she excuses married men who see her. Offering sex for money caused her the delusion that made her forget she is helping to damage the very same kinds of relationships she once had which broke up her family and affected her children.

The sex trade is a convenient market to get sex, which enables many men to cheat. If there were few working girls, it would not enable that kind of behaviour when things in a relationship get a little rocky.

Being a john, of course I am part of this equation. Many speak about respect to the SPs, but frankly real respect starts only when there is truth on both sides.

You make some very compelling points. But in referance to the valuable service, you make 'a' point, however there are other scenerios that should be considered. One would be a married man seeing an SP for sex will not have to concern himself with the emotional side of a 'cheating' relationship.

Men who for what ever reason are not in a long term relationship still need sex, and they can see an SP, verses taking a women against her wishes.

Like you said the sex trade is a convienent market, and when a relationship gets a little rocky or even if the two have different sex drives, the trade allows a person to get his needs met and not necessarily having to terminate the relationship. In that thought, the trade could or may save relationships. Again without the trade cheating with another women (married or single) usually results in more than sex there comes a emotional attachment and that's when things usually get ugly.

 

[Damaged]

...BUT if the 'johns' won't themselves respect the women how in hell are we ever going to convince the rest of society???

I'm not clear on how expecting sex for the money paid for this service is not respecting the Service Providers?

If you gave a Dentist $1000 to give you a cap on your tooth would you not expect a cap on your tooth? Would you be happy if he took your money and just talked to you?

How about going to a Registered Massage therapist. Do you expect them to massage you for your money? Does that mean you do not respect them because they are only there to please you by giving you a massage?

I think people are really confusing respect with providing a service. Obviously your money doesn't buy you the right to call them every name in the book while receiving the service unless that is what is offered and agreed upon from the start.

 

[Irresistible Isabelle]

We all know that "financial compensation is for my time only...blah blah blah" is just for legal purposes. Of course you should expect the service that everyone knows you are really paying for.

Is it right for a SP to yap your ear of for 45 min and have to resort to giving you a quicky HJ to get the job done before the 1 hour mark? Of course not. And people who do that should be reviewed accordingly.

I totally agree with you Damaged that there is some confusion going on here. Respect is not incompatible with expecting someone to do the job they were hired to do. Respect is about being considerate, respecting someone's limits and fulfilling your end of the business transaction (paying the correct fee and staying for the time you have paid for) plain and simple.

I think what some are saying is that we SP's don't like being tossed a wad of bills and then instantly being made to feel like we are nothing more that 1-3 hole(s) to be plugged for whatever time is paid for. Pardon the crassness.

If you hire a dentist to cap your teeth you don't tell him to lay off the initial "How's your day?" small talk and drill your teeth already ;-)

 

[georgebushmoron]

You make some very compelling points. But in referance to the valuable service, you make 'a' point, however there are other scenerios that should be considered. One would be a married man seeing an SP for sex will not have to concern himself with the emotional side of a 'cheating' relationship.

Men who for what ever reason are not in a long term relationship still need sex, and they can see an SP, verses taking a women against her wishes.

Like you said the sex trade is a convienent market, and when a relationship gets a little rocky or even if the two have different sex drives, the trade allows a person to get his needs met and not necessarily having to terminate the relationship. In that thought, the trade could or may save relationships. Again without the trade cheating with another women (married or single) usually results in more than sex there comes a emotional attachment and that's when things usually get ugly.

You also make very good points. While it is true that the existence of an outlet for physical sex may be a stop gap for men from cheating emotionally with a regular woman, and thus may be a stop gap for men from having to terminate their committed relationships, I do believe that physical sex is an enabling behaviour. Suppose your wife says that as she married you when she was relatively inexperienced, she now decides that she needs to see male escorts to catch up on what she missed out on. If she did this while your relationship was rocky, her daliances could very easily enable a behaviour of separation as she practices that behaviour with other men. Lastly, the world of opportunity is opened up when cheating with a service provider. She may realise that instead of boring old fat white you, she likes muscular latin lovers who are younger than her - and hey why not, these younger men say they are attracted to her! So why make the effort to salvage a troubled relationship when the excitement of something new and now highly valued could be on the horizon?

I've known many men who when they were younger, looked at only caucasian women as the only possibility of a long term relationship. The SP world in the Lower Mainland being filled with asian women, these men as they get older realise that their middle aged caucasian wives look at least 10 years older than the asian ones of the same age, and because of their culture, seem far more eager to please (ie: subservient). Many caucasian men in committed relationships who, while utilizing the services of these asian women, are temporarily removing the possibility of termination of their existing relationships, are finding that these asian women are opening a world of possibility they are missing out upon were they to stay in their relationships.

Your point about it being a stop gap is correct, but I believe that it is a temporary one that in the end could easily make it more difficult to resume a troubled committed relationship. These wives typically have a lot to lose were they to lose their husbands, and the SP industry just makes it all that much easier for these women to lose out.

 

[totravel]

I'm not clear on how expecting sex for the money paid for this service is not respecting the Service Providers?

I think people are really confusing respect with providing a service. Obviously your money doesn't buy you the right to call them every name in the book while receiving the service unless that is what is offered and agreed upon from the start.

No one is disputing that we pay money for sex, intimacy, conversation, or even as you put it: the right to call them every name in the book (or vice versa in the the consensual BDSM scene).
My point (and nube's I expect) is that the thread brought up the attitude by some posters that SP's can expect to be treated like fuck-dolls, and it is that attitude that leads to exploitation of the vulnerable. (Worst case scenario, 50+ missing women that could very easily have been forgotten by society, which regarded them as trash anyways).
You have no idea what some SP's have told me about the attitudes of some johns. There is no way I would ever put up with that behavior, if I was in their shoes.

 

[Irresistible Isabelle]

I heard a great line from a TV show one time. An escort referred to herself as a satisfaction facilitator. She explained that she primarily sees happily married or involved men, who want to remain happily married BUT due to incompatible drives or the male need for variety, they are missing something....either good loving at home or novelty. Her services allow a discrete way for men to get their needs met in a safe way that hopefully will allow them to remain happily married and not stress the relationship with their SOs by nagging or pressuring them to meet all of their needs, thereby straining the relationship. It's much less messy than shagging the secretary who then expects the guy to leave his wife, or "accidentally" gets pregnant, or fractures the relationship by revealing his indiscretion.

GBM.... btw I wasn't seriously suggesting in my earliest post that men who seek advice from us (about a variety of subject) are literally seeking "therapy" or that we are providing clinical counseling services. I think you know I just meant they want advice or someone to hash things out with. Apologies if the way I worded it made it sound more clinical than I intended. Our rates are much higher than most therapists, so it's not exactly a practical way to get serious help.

 

[Damaged]

No one is disputing that we pay money for sex, intimacy, conversation, or even as you put it: the right to call them every name in the book (or vice versa in the the consensual BDSM scene).
My point (and nube's I expect) is that the thread brought up the attitude by some posters that SP's can expect to be treated like fuck-dolls, and it is that attitude that leads to exploitation of the vulnerable. (Worst case scenario, 50+ missing women that could very easily have been forgotten by society, which regarded them as trash anyways).
You have no idea what some SP's have told me about the attitudes of some johns. There is no way I would ever put up with that behavior, if I was in their shoes.

Care to show some quotes of where posters said they expect SP's to act like "Fuck Dolls"? I think the common theme is the many of the posters expect to "fuck" a SP not just chat with them (Sorry its a little harse).

As for your last point, they can always change jobs if the behavior is too much for them. That's what most people do. Many jobs have aspects that others would not put up with, mine's dealing with stupid, whiney, sales people all day.

 

[totravel]

Care to show some quotes of where posters said they expect SP's to act like "Fuck Dolls"? I think the common theme is the many of the posters expect to "fuck" a SP not just chat with them (Sorry its a little harse).

Look carefully, both on this thread and the one you started with the poll, and you will see that some go to see SP's to fuck only and not chat at all, they consider it their right to demand the SP shut up (except for allowing for the filling of orifices).
This can be accomplished for less money, and without the socially abhorrent behavior, simply by using a blow-up doll (and when the doll's pussy gets less tighter than you like, you can just get another one.)

 

[Damaged]

Look carefully, both on this thread and the one you started with the poll, and you will see that some go to see SP's to fuck only and not chat at all, they consider it their right to demand the SP shut up (except for allowing for the filling of orifices).
This can be accomplished for less money, and without the socially abhorrent behavior, simply by using a blow-up doll (and when the doll's pussy gets less tighter than you like, you can just get another one.)

Abhorrent behavior? Why do you think you are better than others simply because you choose to talk to your SP rather than just have sex. If the SP doesn't like clients that just want to go straight to the sex part then all they need to do is refuse to see them. I've seen more than a few SP's that want to get straight to the sex yet you seem to condem that behavior.

 

[totravel]

Abhorrent behavior? Why do you think you are better than others simply because you choose to talk to your SP rather than just have sex. If the SP doesn't like clients that just want to go straight to the sex part then all they need to do is refuse to see them. I've seen more than a few SP's that want to get straight to the sex yet you seem to condem that behavior.

Wrong, it's not "abhorrent behavior" to be condemned if it is consensual.
As for an SP "refusing to see a client" that is easier said than done.
A client/john may not reveal enough of his personality or expectations through a screening process. A potentially dangerous situation for the SP could ensue, should she try to terminate a session and he's unwilling to leave.

 

[Damaged]

Wrong, it's not "abhorrent behavior" to be condemned if it is consensual.
As for an SP "refusing to see a client" that is easier said than done.
A client/john may not reveal enough of his personality or expectations through a screening process. A potentially dangerous situation for the SP could ensue, should she try to terminate a session and he's unwilling to leave.

The situation you describe has no solution according to you. You say she can't successfully screen them and she can't kick them out so there is nothing to debate.

I think you should stick to romancing your SP's with Enya CD's.

 

[totravel]

The situation you describe has no solution according to you. You say she can't successfully screen them and she can't kick them out so there is nothing to debate.

I think you should stick to romancing your SP's with Enya CD's.

You should ask SP's how safe they feel in that situation.

As for Enya, that's uncalled for. I would never use her boring music in a session.

 

[zepher]

Ok now I have to pipe in ...what the hell is so bad about Enya, cuz I just had the best session with a gal that rocked my world when she introduced the singer to me ...and then gave me my donation back simply becuz I respected her and treated her well & got along so well!

This thread is exactly why I still come on here at times just for the entertaining debates and to learn about the characters who I think I would like to meet and the ones I'm likely to ignore.

Everyone is correct. We adults are engaging in encounters here ...but what the big E represents to us individuals should be and is personal. There is no cookie cutter to all Es. Yes, We (including SPs) all have minimum expectations or the deal is not likely to complete as in any contracting we do in our daily lives. Good E = Good reviews + repeat + SP's special YMMV services. Bad E = Bad reviews + no repeat + SP's warning

We all expect to be serve a good meal in a restaurant...but try ordering for it if we say "Fucking bring my burger now bitch cuz here's my fat wallet".

PS everything written here/above, is only written purely for entertainment purposes only. No Perberts or SPs should actually be hurt as we are all fictional. Have a nice day.

 

[zepher]

Ok now I have to pipe in ...what the hell is so bad about Enya, cuz I just had the best session with a gal that rocked my world when she introduced the singer to me ...and then gave me my donation back simply becuz I respected her and treated her well & got along so well!

This thread is exactly why I still come on here at times just for the entertaining debates and to learn about the characters who I think I would like to meet and the ones I'm likely to ignore.

Everyone is correct. We adults are engaging in encounters here ...but what the big E represents to us individuals should be and is personal. There is no cookie cutter to all Es. Yes, We (including SPs) all have minimum expectations or the deal is not likely to complete as in any contracting we do in our daily lives. Good E = Good reviews + repeat + SP's special YMMV services. Bad E = Bad reviews + no repeat + SP's warning

We all expect to be serve a good meal in a restaurant...but try ordering for it if we say "Fucking bring my burger now bitch cuz here's my fat wallet".

 

[JustAGuy]

Referring to a few posts previous to this, I'd like to point out there's a difference between "abhorrent" behaviour and "aberrant" behaviour. I think one was typed but the other may have been meant.

 

[totravel]

Referring to a few posts previous to this, I'd like to point out there's a difference between "abhorrent" behaviour and "aberrant" behaviour. I think one was typed but the other may have been meant.

I meant the original "abhorrent".