SP Asking for reference from other SP/Agency! Doesn't make any sense.

[blackbeard23]

Hello everyone, first post but I'm on LL and perb since last November.
I have seen a total of 9 SP as of now. (I might post reviews later but I don't like posting much)
Recently I came across some SP who wants a reference from others, which is a bit weird! it's like going to the store to buy something and asking the owner if the other store next door have the product.
my question is for the Independent SP, Agencies (LuxAff /Coco/AF) or anyone with experience into that matter.
Is it okay/normal with you to go through the hassle of giving a reference to someone you met maybe once/twice, don't you feel "betrayed" if he is returning customer and now he want's to try someone else!
and what does a "reference" looks like? they just call/text you and ask you about me in general or what. considering some agencies have hundreds of customers, how could they remember/know me.
Thank You

 

[The Black Allure]

References are usually optional. You don't have to go that route if you don't want to, though it depends on what screening methods the provider offers. References also tend to help provide peace of mind if the SP knows that the person they're seeing has a great track record with other providers/agencies.

We have no problem providing references. Variety is the spice of life!

 

[milemiles]

All the agencies communicate with each other and many of the SWs too. Safety is a priority, so it just makes sense to share info for everyone, and it's not just about competition.

 

[masterpoonhunter]

Well if it helps I have been pooning for over 50 years and have yet to be asked to provide a reference.
However I do know many SP's keep track of the text/phone call and the details probably an OK or a not OK reference so as noted prior, they do communicate.

 

[vanperb]

Question to supporting members that requires reference - what if i dont have one? Does that mean i cant partake until i get a reference?

There are alternatives usually. They take the form of a valid LinkedIn profile, a photo of blacked out government ID, a deposit in the form of a gift card, etc,.
Basically a good faith gesture that show you're not wasting their time. Ask the interested provider and they will usually give you a list of acceptable alternatives.

 

[vanperb]

I have seen a total of 9 SP as of now. (I might post reviews later but I don't like posting much)

Thanks for adding back to the community!

Is it okay/normal with you to go through the hassle of giving a reference to someone you met maybe once/twice, don't you feel "betrayed" if he is returning customer and now he want's to try someone else!
and what does a "reference" looks like? they just call/text you and ask you about me in general or what. considering some agencies have hundreds of customers, how could they remember/know me.

So.. each person is different. Some provider can see being asked for a reference as a betrayal, or they can see it part of the business, or they can see it as helping out a community in a business that can be fraught with danger.
SP's do remember their clients, even if they number in the hundreds. Maybe not all the details but if you leave a good or shitty impression they'll definitely remember. They also have correspondence and calendars that help jog their memory.
References themselves are usually just a quick exchange of information about a client. As a courtesy a client should contact the provider ahead of time to ask them if they can be used as a reference. This is a opportunity to refresh their memory of who you are and give them a heads up about the potential contact from another provider.

As for references, let's take an empathetic route.
Pretend you're running a business with sensitive data. If at all possible you'd want all potential employees dealing with sensitive data to have background checks, drug screening, and maybe a few references from prior employers. I mean a bad employee could potentially cost you a ton of money or ruin your business.
Now instead of sensitive data, imagine it's your life you're letting a complete stranger potentially take control of while completely naked. Way scarier, and a distinct possibility as a provider. Can you see how minimal a reference from another provider can seem when it's their lives they're worried about?

 

[westwoody]

Reputable sp’s who are professional have no problem with references or referrals.

 

[Mr. J]

I get that it's obviously for some security and peace of mind. Though I've never had to give a reference, I have no issue with providing references.

 

[Big_Guy_Rye]

Question to supporting members that requires reference - what if i dont have one? Does that mean i cant partake until i get a reference?

...kinda of like this? *after replacing 'experience' with 'reference'; and insert 'blow' before 'job'...lol

I'm sure those in this practice would allow some latitude to skip this step. But like this person said:

There are alternatives usually. They take the form of a valid LinkedIn profile, a photo of blacked out government ID, a deposit in the form of a gift card, etc,.

...they expect you to leave a paper-trail, and chip away at your anonymity and personal discretion. In all fairness, it's a practice reserved for top shelf VIP providers and/or agencies; so it's not like they'll burn you with your own person information threatening to expose you to your wife or valued career; at that level of service they have a reputation to maintain themselves. I mean, why would a $1,000/hour provider blackmail you?

 

[SolidSnake]

Some will accept a Perb handle in good standing. (I'm sure they will DM for confirmation.) However not sure if it works for lurkers or newbies.

 

[vanperb]

...they expect you to leave a paper-trail, and chip away at your anonymity and personal discretion.

A person gives out more information to the guy delivering their pizza...
But yes, if you are feeling utterly threatened there are providers that don't need references so everyone can feel like a winner.

 

[Forum mod]

I guess we are going to have to start treating complaining about offering references the same way we treat complaining about deposits? Trying very hard to be patient and understanding here, but these topics have been discussed ad nauseam here for ages.

Guys, if you want to see her, provide the information asked for. If you are not comfortable meeting the screening requirements, take your business elsewhere. Don't complain about it here, it's not up to you! The ladies set the terms with which they are comfortable being intimate and exposing themselves to danger with complete strangers. If you don't like it, stay home and jerk off. Drop the sense of entitlement and the paranoia. Stick to reputable providers. Don't give your info to a random off leolist with no history or website. If you do pursue an unknown and get taken for a ride or ripped off, it's a self inflicted wound, while you might get some sympathy, what you really need is to give your head a shake. Do you conduct all your other business in life with that little care and attention?

Seriously guys, how many times must the same common sense advice be repeated?

 

[Lowproperv]

Hello everyone, first post but I'm on LL and perb since last November.
I have seen a total of 9 SP as of now. (I might post reviews later but I don't like posting much)
Recently I came across some SP who wants a reference from others, which is a bit weird! it's like going to the store to buy something and asking the owner if the other store next door have the product.
my question is for the Independent SP, Agencies (LuxAff /Coco/AF) or anyone with experience into that matter.
Is it okay/normal with you to go through the hassle of giving a reference to someone you met maybe once/twice, don't you feel "betrayed" if he is returning customer and now he want's to try someone else!
and what does a "reference" looks like? they just call/text you and ask you about me in general or what. considering some agencies have hundreds of customers, how could they remember/know me.
Thank You

Sorry dude. You lost my interest after you stated that you have seen 9 providers but have not shared any feedback. You "might" post some reviews later lol? Now you're asking for advice. All take this guy.

I assume perb has helped you with a percentage of the Sp's you've seen. Give back a little bud. Your input can make or break someone's day.

If an agency requires a reference - that is their buisness model. Do what they require or find an agency that has less restrictions.

I for one, will not go to an agencmythat requires my LinkedIn/ social media handle/ drivers ID or perb handle because I assess that as too risky. It is unknown what, if anything, can happen to that information in 10 years. plus, having my id stored in some pooning database is waaay too risky. What if someone hacks it? Or a disgruntled employee does something nuts? too many possibilities = too many risks for me and my private life.

 

[Cock Throppled]

If members want to continue discussing something, where's the problem? I've never understood why "this has been discussed before" is an issue if members still post in a thread. How mant times do guys sit around in a bar and discuss pussy, baseball, the weather, cars, or anything else over and over? It is called a Lounge, after all.

 

[rebelwithsomecause]

If members want to continue discussing something, where's the problem? I've never understood why "this has been discussed before" is an issue if members still post in a thread. How mant times do guys sit around in a bar and discuss pussy, baseball, the weather, cars, or anything else over and over? It is called a Lounge, after all.

Because it's likely you're not adding anything new to the discussion and people are honestly tired of - and over - these topics......mods are people too who have had to read the exact same questions and comments worded differently over and over when there are likely tons of threads...moreover clients discussing or debating how SPs choose to conduct their own business practices is drastically different than neutral and irrelevant group discussions on the weather or sports.....finally the thread doesn't come off as discussion oriented it comes off as a complaint or vent looking for like minded individuals to validate their feelings.

 

[Forum mod]

Thanks to those chiming in, Cock Throppled is entitled to his opinion. If you note, I haven't closed this down, just asked a question about why this is such an imposition and pointed out some opinions of my own. CT has had issues with mods making posts for years, doubt anything will change that. In the end, the topic will either die out on it's own or admin will make a call based on the board rules to move references into the same territory as pricing. Deposits too. In the meantime, post away.

 

[Cock Throppled]

In the end, the topic will either die out on it's own ...

Exactly. If members don't want to discuss something, it will die out on its own. If it continues to be of interest to some, it will still eventually die out without interference.

 

[Big_Guy_Rye]

A person gives out more information to the guy delivering their pizza...

Except it's legal to order a pizza, whereas as soliciting still isn't; that's what's at stake here. But as I said, VIP-level providers tend to take discretion just as seriously and respectfully, as a pizza parlour would, because they understand the sanctity of a good business relationship. But in cases of the past, when pizza-delivery guys steal your credit card information and address when you order at least you can call the cops and get it sorted out, and they'll be on your side. Who's going to help you if a less-professional provider decides to burn you with the information you give as an alternative to a reference? (Again, it's a doubtful at those higher-tier providers, but there those poseurs out there too).

But yes, if you are feeling utterly threatened there are providers that don't need references so everyone can feel like a winner.

This is true, not disagreeing, if too much is at stake for the client to leave a paper trail or exposure to their real-world aliases, then of course move along. And the end of the day, "the lady decides; and there is plenty of fish in the sea"....

 

[Cock Throppled]

Because it's likely you're not adding anything new to the discussion and people are honestly tired of - and over - these topics......mods are people too who have had to read the exact same questions and comments worded differently over and over when there are likely tons of threads...moreover clients discussing or debating how SPs choose to conduct their own business practices is drastically different than neutral and irrelevant group discussions on the weather or sports.....finally the thread doesn't come off as discussion oriented it comes off as a complaint or vent looking for like minded individuals to validate their feelings.

Then ignore the thread, and it will die.

 

[westwoody]

If you can’t get a positive reference from a woman you have seen before she must have a reason. Ok…maybe not and she’s just being a jerk, there are some who don’t give references. But overall it doesn’t look right that you can’t get a reference.