Socially, is a coffee shop with laptop the same as chilling at home on desktop?

[LoadShooter]

Right now, I don’t have much of a life outside of work. I don’t really have any single friends to hang out with and most of my friends are wifed up. I spend a lot of my free time after work sitting at home infront of my desktop computer. I mostly surf pretty normal/not too exciting stuff like:
-Online dating
-Following my favorite sports teams
-Watching downloaded tv shows and movies
-Reading forums
-Looking for jobs
-NSFW: watching and masterbating to porn, and looking at prostitute ads and reading reviews

To get myself out of the house more, I was thinking of buying a lap top in addition to my desktop. That way, I could just do most of my internet activities outside of the house at a coffee shop. My question is for people that normally hang out at coffee shops with their laptops:

Will it help my life in any way socially to be out at a coffee shop hanging out with your laptop? Or will the effect be the same as if you were sitting in your own home? The idea sounds interesting in that a laptop would get me out more often, but I could also see months and months going by of not meeting anyone new because coffee shops aren’t exactly the social equivalent of a nightclub. I could see my experience being me peeking up from my computer to spot an attractive girl here and there, and that being the extent of it. Anybody have any advice/input on chilling at coffee shops with a laptop instead of nerding out on the computer at home?

 

[Dgodus]

I don't frequent coffee shops or use a laptop. I can however assume if while you surf the web you look absorbed in what you're doing people won't really approach you. Can't be much different than frequenting a gym. After awhile you can tell who's there just to do their business and who is open to social contact. Being passive or absorbed in your laptop won't net you much, pretty much what you guessed will happen. Like any social situation you'll get better results being active, which requires figuring out who's there just to do their business and who's open to social contact.

 

[PlayfulAlex]

I've been in some coffee shops where there is definitely a 'regular' crowd. So, if you're gonna pursue this, I'd pick a coffee shop where you like the vibe of the people. Then pick the time of day, and head over at that time frequently. As you become a regular, you'll start to notice which staff are always there at that time, and soon you'll have some familiar faces to say Hi to. Then, don't get so absorbed in your laptop that you can't be friendly to the other patrons. I think this idea has merit....certainly more interesting than sitting at home every night with your desktop. That is, unless you wanna take a dance class, or racquetball lessons! All the best, with expanding your social world!

 

[InTheBum]

I don't frequent coffee shops or use a laptop. I can however assume if while you surf the web you look absorbed in what you're doing people won't really approach you. Can't be much different than frequenting a gym. After awhile you can tell who's there just to do their business and who is open to social contact. Being passive or absorbed in your laptop won't net you much, pretty much what you guessed will happen. Like any social situation you'll get better results being active, which requires figuring out who's there just to do their business and who's open to social contact.

Usually the person that is open to social contact at coffee shops is the old fart that wants someone to talk to...:fear:

 

[InTheBum]

I've been in some coffee shops where there is definitely a 'regular' crowd. So, if you're gonna pursue this, I'd pick a coffee shop where you like the vibe of the people. Then pick the time of day, and head over at that time frequently. As you become a regular, you'll start to notice which staff are always there at that time, and soon you'll have some familiar faces to say Hi to. Then, don't get so absorbed in your laptop that you can't be friendly to the other patrons. I think this idea has merit....certainly more interesting than sitting at home every night with your desktop. That is, unless you wanna take a dance class, or racquetball lessons! All the best, with expanding your social world!

Personally, I can't stand people at coffee shops that sit on their laptops for countless hours...

 

[Dgodus]

Usually the person that is open to social contact at coffee shops is the old fart that wants someone to talk to...:fear:

Well back in nineteen aught six we used to put an onion on our belt, now these onions all came from this little farm the next town over, now Margaret who ran that farm had one leg just a little shorter than the other from a cow falling down on it, the doctor who badly set her leg never did get on too well in that town due in fact from that Little oriental wife he kept in tow all the time I never understood any dislike of her a very polite little thing unlike Jed down the street who always tried to..... Did you know we used to put an onion on our belt

 

[Luvda_silicone_crinkle]

Looking at your list of computer surfing activities the only one i dont think would be appropriate at the coffee shop would be watching and masterbating to porn... who knows though this might work for you!!

 

[Holly Taylor]

I think that using a laptop gives off the "I'm busy" signal. I know that I often pull out my phone when I'm waiting in a coffee shop or a a bus stop and I want people to leave me alone.

That being said, it's better than staying at home. When you're at home, you have NO chance. When you're out, you have SOME chance, even if it's small.

If you're really serious about expanding your social network, I would try other activities. I've heard that walking your dog at a dog park really increases your chances of meeting new people. (Dog owners, do you think this is true?)

Do you have any interests that you could pursue in social groups? For example, joining a wine tasting club?

Yoga might be another good option. I think women would be intrigued by a guy willing to try yoga - also, the male/female ratio would probably be in your favour. Plus, even if you don't meet anybody, at least you'll have done something good for your body.

Finally, I would suggest volunteering. You could pick a cause you support, and you'd be likely to meet people who share your value system, because obviously they've also chosen to help that cause. It could be anything from volunteering with a political party you support, to helping out at the SPCA, to helping out with homeless people. If you choose a political party, you know you'll meet people who share your values. If you choose a vulnerable population, you'll likely meet a kind, compassionate woman (always good, right?).

That's just off the top of my head. At any rate, get out there and try SOMETHING! Good luck

 

[Dgodus]

Yes walking your dog through hiking paths, parks will have you stopping and talking with other dog owners, provided your dog is either a good looking dog or a social dog (mine is both, he rocks). Better yet are specific dog parks (if your intention is meeting people). As when walking your dog you need to cross paths with someone, at a dog park the owners just tend to stand around while the dogs do their thing, much more opportunity for social interactions.

 

[HeMadeMeDoIt]

On a lighter note when you're on your laptop in coffee shops try to avoid surfing pros ads and masturbating, both are socially frowned upon for some reason

Can't go wrong with a dog, my friend used to joke about me turning the dog into my own private whorehouse because of all the action I got from there, young chicks, older chicks, cougars, milfs you fucking name it! It does help that I have an awesome large breed very handsome great with other dogs 4 legged son. I swear he sometimes gave me the look of "here we go again" lol

 

[Dgodus]

On a lighter note when you're on your laptop in coffee shops try to avoid surfing pros ads and masturbating, both are socially frowned upon for some reason

Can't go wrong with a dog, my friend used to joke about me turning the dog into my own private whorehouse because of all the action I got from there, young chicks, older chicks, cougars, milfs you fucking name it! It does help that I have an awesome large breed very handsome great with other dogs 4 legged son. I swear he sometimes gave me the look of "here we go again" lol

Yea I got a Shepard/husky mutt. Super friendly and walkable without a leash. I noticed with my other dogs before people always call an unknown friendly dog buddy or fella, so I named him buddy. Now he's even friendlier to strangers because most of them already know him as far as he's concerned. Because there is no leash he picks who I'll be talking to wether I want to or not!

 

[HeMadeMeDoIt]

Yea I got a Shepard/husky mutt. Super friendly and walkable without a leash. I noticed with my other dogs before people always call an unknown friendly dog buddy or fella, so I named him buddy. Now he's even friendlier to strangers because most of them already know him as far as he's concerned. Because there is no leash he picks who I'll be talking to wether I want to or not!

I hope your taste in bitches is similar ! hahahaha

 

[vancity_cowboy]

my buddy's gf has this little chihuahua they ask me to look after when they go hiking...

YEAH!! tell me about it - little chick magnet, lol (oh he's so cuuuuuute...) :thumb:

 

[Dgodus]

I hope your taste in bitches is similar ! hahahaha

Well we both love em on all fours!

 

[Flanders]

You actually CAN go wrong with a dog if you haven't put in the time and effort to train and socialize it. You won't get much action when "REX" is the biggest idiot aggressive dog in the park. As said earlier, a handsome and social dog is as close to a sure thing as you can get.

Here is a pretty accurate summation of coffee shop laptop guy...
http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=APATLrEte9s

 

[westcoastjoe]

Flanders....that video is perfect....there should also be one for the people who drag their big textbooks out to make it look like they are working on their PHD....gimme a break