Romantic emotions getting in the way.
- Thread starter Paris
- Start date
There's much to be said for the single life, Caryn. I'm closing in on 60 a LOT faster than I like and have never married, though I came close on two occasions. What's essential, I find, is liking yourself. Someone who doesn't definitely isn't cut out for the single life because there's a perpetual void that they need someone else to fill. But if you're happy with who you are, enjoy your time alone every bit as much as your time spent with others and don't ever find yourself saying "I'm so bored!", remaining single forever might indeed be a viable option for you. In my case, there was the added incentive of disliking children immensely and wanting them in my everyday world about as much as I want to be tarred and feathered.Paris said:
I think business is business,and it ain't anybody's business, but my business,but I have not seen a relationship work out in this business.. Please correct me if I am wrong...
Please correct me if I am wrong...I do believe the apt phrase is Service Provider. Anyone who cannot seperate the two, is not ready for any type of relationship.sherrihates69 said:
Some people have asked me why someone would pay for sexx?? My reply is always the same, to those who ask.
Service & performance, without all the mind games and baggage that comes along with a relationship.
Only a fool would make you feel that way.sherrihates69 said:
Regards
EVIL Teken . . .
I've been close to marriage too,thank god it didn't work out.I just feel its easier to see a lady and have a good time . otherwise you go into the whole dating thing,phonecalls and why didn't you call me and dinners and drinks and at the end of the night you MIGHT get some. I enjoy the no hassle and the good sex I get.As for getting involved with an sp,,Theres a few I'd love to date,but honestly not sure I could handle all the other sex shes getting from working.So I 'll just keep doing what I'm doing...lol
I don't know if (I) could actually date a SP. Just being honest with everyone as alot of people say they could blah blah blah.
Not like I would be in a position to tell her to quite her day job.
Regards
EVIL Teken . . . <--- Who misses those friends with benefits !
Not like I would be in a position to tell her to quite her day job.
Regards
EVIL Teken . . . <--- Who misses those friends with benefits !
time frame of a relationship
Is there a time frame for a relationship, I have had a wonderful relationship with an sp for almost a year now, outside what is considered a s/p - client relationship. I respect her and don't judge her for what she does, she is independent and does what it takes to make a life. Sure she could have a job working for minimum or a little better, but we would'nt be able to spend the time together that we do or do the things we do. As I said she is independent and doesn't want to accept monetary help from me, so I don't push her. Do we have to have a 5, 10, or 15 year relationship before its a relationship? We have discussed this and its what in your heart that matters, and how you feel about and the respect you have for your partner, s/o or sp. We have talked about taking this farther, but for now status quo is where it is going to stay.
bigwoodsman
Is there a time frame for a relationship, I have had a wonderful relationship with an sp for almost a year now, outside what is considered a s/p - client relationship. I respect her and don't judge her for what she does, she is independent and does what it takes to make a life. Sure she could have a job working for minimum or a little better, but we would'nt be able to spend the time together that we do or do the things we do. As I said she is independent and doesn't want to accept monetary help from me, so I don't push her. Do we have to have a 5, 10, or 15 year relationship before its a relationship? We have discussed this and its what in your heart that matters, and how you feel about and the respect you have for your partner, s/o or sp. We have talked about taking this farther, but for now status quo is where it is going to stay.
bigwoodsman
Caryn
Caryn anything is possible, this is why this great world of ours is sometimes the most fantastic place to be and at others it just sucks!
Wow too deep fo me~!
Any relationship can work if based on mutual respect, friendship, and love.
I have never been in a relationship that has broken up ugly - either romantically or in business - must be why I send out over 300 Xmas cards and my email list contains over 3,000 contacts!
Caryn anything is possible, this is why this great world of ours is sometimes the most fantastic place to be and at others it just sucks!
Wow too deep fo me~!
Any relationship can work if based on mutual respect, friendship, and love.
I have never been in a relationship that has broken up ugly - either romantically or in business - must be why I send out over 300 Xmas cards and my email list contains over 3,000 contacts!
Dating a Client
I had the misfortune of falling for a client. (I'm not talking love, it was just a crush) I'm not sure if I scared him away, or he was really turned off by the thought of actually dating an SP. Either way, he stopped returning my calls.
i'm not saying that a relationship between a client/sp couldn't work, but it would have to be an open relationship with no lies.
Sherri, you said that you couldn't date a client because he would know what you did for a living..... Does that mean when you meet a guy elsewhere, you DON'T tell him what you do?! To start a relationship with a lie/omition is the WORST way to start it.
Even when I meet a guy at the park with my kid, when we start dating, I'm 100% honest with him about what I do BEFORE we ever engage in any sort of sexual relationship. So what if 95% of them run for the hills, at least I'm not going to feel guilt for our entire relationship.
I had the misfortune of falling for a client. (I'm not talking love, it was just a crush) I'm not sure if I scared him away, or he was really turned off by the thought of actually dating an SP. Either way, he stopped returning my calls.
i'm not saying that a relationship between a client/sp couldn't work, but it would have to be an open relationship with no lies.
Sherri, you said that you couldn't date a client because he would know what you did for a living..... Does that mean when you meet a guy elsewhere, you DON'T tell him what you do?! To start a relationship with a lie/omition is the WORST way to start it.
Even when I meet a guy at the park with my kid, when we start dating, I'm 100% honest with him about what I do BEFORE we ever engage in any sort of sexual relationship. So what if 95% of them run for the hills, at least I'm not going to feel guilt for our entire relationship.
I could never imagine you having an ugly break-up. You really are probably one of the nicest people I know.zodiak said:
However......I have always had really bad luck with relationships. Don't think I ever dated ANYONE in my life that didn't cheat on me, or forgot to mention that they were married. Don't mean to sound like a whiner here, but it's the truth.
Just thought if two people met under the circumstances of this business it would be so much more complicated. But then my experiences have warped me somewhat.
Anyone who can...then I suppose it would be a good thing.
Paris/Caryn
Just out of curiosity.....did it break your heart that he was not returning your calls any longer? And if so how did you handle it?BobbiVan said:
Paris/Caryn
Falling in Love with an S/P
I fell in love with an S/P but she doesn't believe me even though I spend more time doing non-sexual activities with her than sexual ones. She resents the fact that I want her out of the sex trade even though the only reason I want this is for her own good.
There's so much deception in this lifestyle that no one believes anyone. Any overtures of emotion are always seen with a sinister angle... it's really sad because many S/P's are very special people... IMHO I believe they just want to be loved and love and the clouds of deception don't allow them to distinguish between the truth and the lies.
I fell in love with an S/P but she doesn't believe me even though I spend more time doing non-sexual activities with her than sexual ones. She resents the fact that I want her out of the sex trade even though the only reason I want this is for her own good.
There's so much deception in this lifestyle that no one believes anyone. Any overtures of emotion are always seen with a sinister angle... it's really sad because many S/P's are very special people... IMHO I believe they just want to be loved and love and the clouds of deception don't allow them to distinguish between the truth and the lies.
Not neccesarily true. If a friendship is strong enough....then the cloud of deception I believe can be lifted.Stan said:
It's what happens down the road when an SP gets out of the business, and her SO/former client believes she may still be doing it.
Holy shit this thread is becoming damn confusing isn't it?
I really didn't think there would be such a big response.....but good feed back non the less.
Pais/Caryn
open minds
I guess when an SP claims to be open minded it means something different than being open minded in a relationship. A client who falls for an SP has to be open minded in a lot of his thinking if they are to form a good relationship outside of the business and even outside after leaving the business. Makes sense?
I guess when an SP claims to be open minded it means something different than being open minded in a relationship. A client who falls for an SP has to be open minded in a lot of his thinking if they are to form a good relationship outside of the business and even outside after leaving the business. Makes sense?
I would suspect that both sides would have to be very open minded and to understand that, at least for awhile, this sort of relationship will not be like lots of other relationships. I hestitate to use the word "normal" because like you Caryn, I'm increasingly confused by what that could possibly mean.
But anyway ... I suspect that with a lot of trust and honesty it could grow into a more "typical" relationship, but for a long time it might be quite different and both sides have to get themselves into a head space that allows for that.
But anyway ... I suspect that with a lot of trust and honesty it could grow into a more "typical" relationship, but for a long time it might be quite different and both sides have to get themselves into a head space that allows for that.
Broken Heart
Yea, it pretty much broke my heart being rejected. I don't take rejection well for some reason. I'm learning to deal with it.
I have had a hard time finding an SO (Not that I'm looking) that is ok with what I do for a living. I've heard that so many girls lie to their partners as long as possible, HOPING they won't find out their Secret life. In all honesty, I would rather be single than have to lie to get a man.
Dating a client just takes out that akward step of telling him what I do, cause he already knows. As for the age gap someone else mentioned, I LOVE it. I only like older guys. Guys my age are dumbass' and are only able to think with one head. Guys my age also have a tendency to see how much money I make and then start Mooching. I like my men to be much older than me.
Yea, it pretty much broke my heart being rejected. I don't take rejection well for some reason. I'm learning to deal with it.
I have had a hard time finding an SO (Not that I'm looking) that is ok with what I do for a living. I've heard that so many girls lie to their partners as long as possible, HOPING they won't find out their Secret life. In all honesty, I would rather be single than have to lie to get a man.
Dating a client just takes out that akward step of telling him what I do, cause he already knows. As for the age gap someone else mentioned, I LOVE it. I only like older guys. Guys my age are dumbass' and are only able to think with one head. Guys my age also have a tendency to see how much money I make and then start Mooching. I like my men to be much older than me.
I would think that I would worry about that.....yes. Good point.tom25 said:
Guess it would depend on how much I trusted the individual or how intense the communication was.
Sorry, I wasn't trying to imply in my last post that it would only be one way.
Paris/Caryn
