One-Timers Vs. Regulars
- Thread starter PuntMeister
- Start date
I may totally have the corner on repeat visitors (not sure, but I could have) as my business has always been built on providing an experience so good that a gentleman would want a do-over. My most-often-repeated visitor dropped by over 90 times before I left the Burnaby area. More commonly is the repeat visitor who has dropped by 20-30-40 times.
I recently wrote a blog post where this topic came up a lot...
http://alexisreadytoplay.blogspot.ca
i cant speak for other ladies, but i find that quite often one or the other starts getting TOO attached . ...and i hate to say it but more often than not the pooner decides he shouldnt be expected to offer the donation any longer if the relationship takes a more personal/intimate turn. then there is jealousy ...just the other day i had received a text fromne of my favorite long time clients. sadly it was to say that he had just read a review of me and couldnt handle it and so had to stop seeing me. it saddens me greatly when something like that happens....not due to the loss of income ,but rather the loss of a friend. not to mention i am in this industry to try to make people happy and feel good; so awful when it backfires
Most ladies who provide excellent service as you described here want your repeat business but they don't need it. None of us are that special.
I spoke with a lady about this many years ago and she mentioned the "extra effort" herself and some ladies put into encouraging a customer to repeat and lack of effort they put forth in order to discourage others. Excellent service and compatibility gets customers to repeat. Ladies providing that level of service are busy enough and don't need to mention to a client that they hope to see him again as she stares longingly into his eyes. But I guess some clients need to hear that.
I am of the same mind on this too.Just not enough Badger to go around hey
I'm going the opposite direction. It took a long time to figure out but for me, now that I've found a small handful of really good regulars, stranger sex has started to lose its appeal. I'm sure I'll still see new ladies from time to time, but I'm pretty content.
I saw one SP pretty regularly for three years and have been venturing out a lot more ladies in 2013. 2014 has arrived and I will see myself keeping to a select few ladies. There are some really nice ladies here that are great to be around outside the bedroom and I always have a great experience with my small group of friends.
Quality wins over Quantity every time in my book :nod:
*Note: the following is solely the opinion of Roxanne Ritchi*
There is something to be said for regulars. You know them, they become friends at some point, and more often than not you can trust them. However, many times there slips in the element of "why should I pay your full rates or stay the alloted amount of time when we are friends?" Unfortunately, this is a very different industry than say, selling shoes and giving people the wholesale price because they are a pal. There is no wholesale price or discounts for friends when the up front costs are the same.
Also, they can fall in love or become infatuated with you and you with them. It either becomes an affair (paid or unpaid) or you stop seeing them. Out of any industry, this one demands objectivity more than any other. There shouldn't be room for compromise when selling intimacy and/or sex. It has to be considered a service/job first, friendship second. Emotional attachment means that the job isn't just the hours you do the job, it means you take it home with you after hours. Between friendly emails and texts and such, the average independent SP does that enough anyways, never mind having to worry about another person's personal life. She has her own family, her own friends, and, in the end, this is how she earns her living. If the lack of objectivity means she cannot earn her living and support herself and her family because the cost to effort ratio is excessive, she has a responsibility to herself to stop seeing the client. Because it is no longer a job.
She is making herself a fantasy woman in a fantasy location having fantasy sex. All SPs are primarily entertainers/performers/artists. The sexual performance is a performance, even with real orgasms (that's a side benefit of the job). You are paying her so you can have unattached sexual relations with your fantasy girl, whatever that may be, and she provides that for you. Ideally, she is also witty and entertaining and makes you feel good, because that is part of providing good service. She wears your chosen costume and make-up (or lack thereof) because she is providing a service for you, and she is taking time away from her studies or family or what-have-you in order to make a living by doing so.
The ideal client meets the following criteria, regular or not:
1) Shows up for appointments on time,or calls if they are going to be late or early.
2) Knows your rate and doesn't negotiate.
3) Knows your limits (time, whether you do Greek,etc,) and doesn't negotiate.
4) Understands boundaries. (Doesn't try to hug you at Superstore or yell out your stage name across a crowded room. Doesn't attempt to interfere in your personal affairs.)
I get what Puntmeister (who is supercool and I'm totally sure meets all criteria for an awesome client) is saying about the look in the eyes and the request for repeat business, but sometimes this can be the last thing you want to do with someone, as they will potentially take it as a sign that you want more than an SP/client relationship. I did this once and received a marriage proposal. Yes, a 100% sincere marriage proposal from someone I knew for 2 hours.
As a general rule, no matter what the profession, there are people you like more than others. Your doctor may prefer seeing your brother to you because they both play golf or share interests, but the service he provides to both of you should be exactly the same, as this is the mark of professionalism.
Sure, if a person is well-versed in Heidegger or knows a lot about The Simpsons (my interests vary), sure I'd like to chat them up about it....what a bonus! However, if they want to talk about football or peat moss or whatever, that's what the good SP talks about, as it's part of providing good service.
IMHO
Very well said :clap2::clap2::clap2:*Note: the following is solely the opinion of Roxanne Ritchi*
There is something to be said for regulars. You know them, they become friends at some point, and more often than not you can trust them. However, many times there slips in the element of "why should I pay your full rates or stay the alloted amount of time when we are friends?" Unfortunately, this is a very different industry than say, selling shoes and giving people the wholesale price because they are a pal. There is no wholesale price or discounts for friends when the up front costs are the same.
Also, they can fall in love or become infatuated with you and you with them. It either becomes an affair (paid or unpaid) or you stop seeing them. Out of any industry, this one demands objectivity more than any other. There shouldn't be room for compromise when selling intimacy and/or sex. It has to be considered a service/job first, friendship second. Emotional attachment means that the job isn't just the hours you do the job, it means you take it home with you after hours. Between friendly emails and texts and such, the average independent SP does that enough anyways, never mind having to worry about another person's personal life. She has her own family, her own friends, and, in the end, this is how she earns her living. If the lack of objectivity means she cannot earn her living and support herself and her family because the cost to effort ratio is excessive, she has a responsibility to herself to stop seeing the client. Because it is no longer a job.
She is making herself a fantasy woman in a fantasy location having fantasy sex. All SPs are primarily entertainers/performers/artists. The sexual performance is a performance, even with real orgasms (that's a side benefit of the job). You are paying her so you can have unattached sexual relations with your fantasy girl, whatever that may be, and she provides that for you. Ideally, she is also witty and entertaining and makes you feel good, because that is part of providing good service. She wears your chosen costume and make-up (or lack thereof) because she is providing a service for you, and she is taking time away from her studies or family or what-have-you in order to make a living by doing so.
The ideal client meets the following criteria, regular or not:
1) Shows up for appointments on time,or calls if they are going to be late or early.
2) Knows your rate and doesn't negotiate.
3) Knows your limits (time, whether you do Greek,etc,) and doesn't negotiate.
4) Understands boundaries. (Doesn't try to hug you at Superstore or yell out your stage name across a crowded room. Doesn't attempt to interfere in your personal affairs.)
I get what Puntmeister (who is supercool and I'm totally sure meets all criteria for an awesome client) is saying about the look in the eyes and the request for repeat business, but sometimes this can be the last thing you want to do with someone, as they will potentially take it as a sign that you want more than an SP/client relationship. I did this once and received a marriage proposal. Yes, a 100% sincere marriage proposal from someone I knew for 2 hours.
IMHO
(It took me awhile to figure this out,...lol... )
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reply to the OP: Yes I absolutely prefer regulars, I find 80-90% of first timers become regulars/repeat visitors. They absolutely become friends and since it is such an intimate connection, the bond can last for years! I have found that not only am I a lover/Mistress/girlfriend, I am also a confidant and at times a councillor/life coach… all roles I thoroughly enjoy, I try My utmost to be available and attentive in whichever ways I am needed most. Touching base via email/texting is always good in between visits
I would have to agree on both! It's great to see new faces but once they become regulars You get to know how to really make him go crazy!
Exactly so, Chest Rockwell (had to repeat that name...fantastic) this is why professional therapists,psychologists,medical doctors etc. maintain a degree of professionalism with their clients. I think the same degree of professionalism needs to be applied to being an SP.
Many of you are married men with complicated lives and families and you don't need additional complications. Speaking as a woman who has been married more than once, I can say with absolute certainty that a wife or SO would be more able to forgive her spouse fulfilling sexual needs (that perhaps she is incapable of providing) than someone who has essentially taken her role as your mate. If anything, the role of an SP should be more like that of a fuck buddy.
It is the responsibility of both parties to keep things from getting too deep, unless the SP/client relationship is no longer such and just becomes a love relationship and in my case, if I fall in love with someone, I can't charge them for sex. Unless the basic element of we are going to keep this on a warm,intimate,friendly, yet reality-based level of client and SP, it will be a "let's run away to Costa Rica together, consequences be damned" situation and all our lives are turned upside-down.
IMHO
i saw my sp last night,
and you know Im kind of done with this hobby, it was never really for me, though I have to admit the need was there,
But her and me will still see each other, I am not much of a hobbiest I am a relationship sort of guy, and that is what we have become, friends and more, but will leave it there,
She has improved my life, as a friend as a confidant as lover, not just someone with a body part or two she lets me use in exchange for money,
I think sex for money is rather a cheap thrill, but admit I have had a lot of cheap thrills,
It is nice to meet and be friends with some one in this, it changes things,
and I guess, depending on ones maturity and place in life, changes might not necessary mean good.
But for me it has and is wonderful.
for her, I don't want to say, or put words in her mouth, but i would say similiar things, or feelings. it has been good
for both of us.
and you know Im kind of done with this hobby, it was never really for me, though I have to admit the need was there,
But her and me will still see each other, I am not much of a hobbiest I am a relationship sort of guy, and that is what we have become, friends and more, but will leave it there,
She has improved my life, as a friend as a confidant as lover, not just someone with a body part or two she lets me use in exchange for money,
I think sex for money is rather a cheap thrill, but admit I have had a lot of cheap thrills,
It is nice to meet and be friends with some one in this, it changes things,
and I guess, depending on ones maturity and place in life, changes might not necessary mean good.
But for me it has and is wonderful.
for her, I don't want to say, or put words in her mouth, but i would say similiar things, or feelings. it has been good
for both of us.
Thank you for this Roxanne. This was eloquently put. I do so often wonder about the emotional side of this (although my experience has been so sporadic, this hasn't become an issue yet), and how that would be negotiated. Having read this, I can see that it should always be the lady who initiates that. Us men are probably too vulnerable to falling head-over-heels in love if we find someone we can really click with after a long time of hurt, lack and loneliness. But then, women can also be good actors, and making men feel good and soothing those emotional hurts are all part of your profession. Very well put. Thank you.*Note: the following is solely the opinion of Roxanne Ritchi*
There is something to be said for regulars...
She is making herself a fantasy woman in a fantasy location having fantasy sex. All SPs are primarily entertainers/performers/artists. The sexual performance is a performance, even with real orgasms (that's a side benefit of the job). You are paying her so you can have unattached sexual relations with your fantasy girl, whatever that may be, and she provides that for you. Ideally, she is also witty and entertaining and makes you feel good, because that is part of providing good service. She wears your chosen costume and make-up (or lack thereof) because she is providing a service for you, and she is taking time away from her studies or family or what-have-you in order to make a living by doing so.
Sure, if a person is well-versed in Heidegger or knows a lot about The Simpsons (my interests vary), sure I'd like to chat them up about it....what a bonus! However, if they want to talk about football or peat moss or whatever, that's what the good SP talks about, as it's part of providing good service.
IMHO
You're welcome
Having sex with a man already establishes an intimacy that may be lacking in his life. However, the truth is is that there is an exchange of money involved in the transaction. This makes it a job, no matter how you look at it. In my personal experience, I have always been the type of lady that supported myself. My family wasn't wealthy and I've had some type of job since I was 10. I had my own apartment at 16 (working as a model and as a waitress) and I was managing a pub at 18. Yes, going to school the entire time as well. Then I was stripping through college and started my first business (tutoring service). Then there was the adult film business, then my other businesses.
I worried while SPing about leaving a trail of emotional damage in my wake from improperly set boundaries. IMO, this is unethical. As an SP, with a stage name and the position of anonymity, I can walk away at any time. So, when people would get too attached and I could see that happening, for their sake, I pulled away. When a client gets jealous about the SP seeing other clients, or says "I love you", you have to let the poor guy go free, because unless you feel the same way about him, he will be hurt at some point. None of us really know how deeply another person can feel hurt either, so it's best to be safe and nip it in the bud before he gets in too deep.
To sum it up: I think it's completely ethical to fuck someone for money, but not to fuck with someone for money, IMO.
p.s. Thanks for saying I'm eloquent, it's my favorite compliment!
Monty Python! I love it. I grew up on that.
But, I think they pinched the idea for this skit from down under and a comedian by the name of Fred Dagg. Bruce, Bruce and Bruce? I remember them from a lot longer ago than I care to remember (and I may even have a cassette tape with that somewhere). I subsequently used the Bruce persona for a standup comedy class in the States some years later...
You are welcome. I like to make people (ladies particularly) happy in all manner of waysYou're welcome
Just wish my SO would be a willing recipient...
