marrying a working girl

[clu]

I once (or twice) had somewhat of long term relationships with SPs
Yes I met them while i was their paying customer
Fell in love or at least I thought I was
Took them out of the business and supported them through their back-to-regular-life

One of them
She had my gold credit card for emergency
I was paying her rent + her tuition + cash for monthly expenses
I was on a business trip for 8 days but ended up coming back 1 day early and went straight to her place
No answer on the phone, no answer at the door
Well ... made a phone call to you-know-where and the receptionist told me someone was back and available for 1 day only
She sort of ran low on funds and decided to make some $ by herself rather than calling me to wire some
Still don't understand the logic but apparently it had something to do with "pride" I was told later

So... no never.
https://youtu.be/V3MwQjUag8A

Out of curiosity, whose idea was this arrangement? Did she say "I don't want to work" or did you say "you don't have to work"?

One of the motivators for women to get into this business is independence and autonomy. Going from that to effectively "kept woman" can be a difficult and emotional transition. She has to convince herself that's what she wants. Until the confidence is there that it's the right path, both sides can have their moments of doubt and insecurity. My POV is if you love the person rather than covet them, then supporting them doesn't just (or necessarily) mean financially.

 

[monger99]

Good point BIGOZZIE.

I also thought it was an unlikely request from the author of "Elsi Dawson is a slut" advertisement.

As for calling women girls, it would be easier to eradicate if the women in general insisted on being treated their actual age. As is, it's still a common usage and more likely to be a compliment than an offence.

girl (noun) 2. a young or relatively young woman. 'he settled down with a nice girl'

Here's my take on this use of these words. I don't think it's necessarily the phrase "working girl" itself that many here find disturbing. I believe it is the perception of intent. Whether PERBites want to believe it or not, the men here have a pretty bad track record of speaking about the SPs in derogatory and/or condescending ways. Instead of talking about the providers here as human beings, we have a tendency to objectify them as a collection of body parts and services. Of course, all of us are not like that, but there are a number of pretty vocal ones that do this regularly. When this type of attitude prevails on a discussion board, it is quite natural to be defensive. I believe the simple acknowledgement of this behavior has applications across the world. Don't make a habit of talking down to or demeaning folks only to throw your arms up in surprise when they take offense. IJS

 

[doctordoom]

So you only date virgins?

No I think the odds of running into an ex of a civilian lady is much less than running into an ex client of a provider. Maybe about 20-5000 odds if she was in the business for awhile? I don't think this works for calculating odds but you probably get the drift. 20 partners compared to 5,000 partners.

 

[Ms Erica Phoenix]

Here's my take on this use of these words. I don't think it's necessarily the phrase "working girl" itself that many here find disturbing. I believe it is the perception of intent. Whether PERBites want to believe it or not, the men here have a pretty bad track record of speaking about the SPs in derogatory and/or condescending ways. Instead of talking about the providers here as human beings, we have a tendency to objectify them as a collection of body parts and services. Of course, all of us are not like that, but there are a number of pretty vocal ones that do this regularly. When this type of attitude prevails on a discussion board, it is quite natural to be defensive. I believe the simple acknowledgement of this behavior has applications across the world. Don't make a habit of talking down to or demeaning folks only to throw your arms up in surprise when they take offense. IJS

BRAVO!!! This exactly. They don't just do this on the board out in public either. Some of them do it in their basement all by themselves & fire off nasty texts or emails that are designed to tear down for no other reason than to cause other people emotional pain. You should read some of the shit that winds up in my inbox, or on my phone!

 

[ddcanz]

Here's my take on this use of these words. I don't think it's necessarily the phrase "working girl" itself that many here find disturbing. I believe it is the perception of intent. Whether PERBites want to believe it or not, the men here have a pretty bad track record of speaking about the SPs in derogatory and/or condescending ways. Instead of talking about the providers here as human beings, we have a tendency to objectify them as a collection of body parts and services. Of course, all of us are not like that, but there are a number of pretty vocal ones that do this regularly. When this type of attitude prevails on a discussion board, it is quite natural to be defensive. I believe the simple acknowledgement of this behavior has applications across the world. Don't make a habit of talking down to or demeaning folks only to throw your arms up in surprise when they take offense. IJS

So referring to an SP as anything other than an SP is in some way demeaning? Should Rule #5 be re-worded to suit, or will this soon become Rule #19?
Look, I get what you are saying about poor prevailing attitudes, but in this case I think everyone is making a mountain out of a mole hill.
You mention perception of intent. Whose? The OP's for using an innocuous term like working girl? ElsiDawson- who promotes herself as a slut? Or most of us that can use common sense and understand that in this case there really is minimal harm. Unless of course every single term needs to be dissected and broken down into it's rawest and potentially most crippling form.
I know there are a lot of twisted, useless, mentally stunted fucks out there that beat off to their own misogynistic mutterings.
However, extrapolating the OP's comment out that far is really reaching.
This thread was started to ask our thoughts on marrying a 'woman' who formerly worked in the industry.
Nit-picking over semantics and phraseology would be better addressed in a fresh thread- start it up and see where it goes.

 

[clu]

No I think the odds of running into an ex of a civilian lady is much less than running into an ex client of a provider. Maybe about 20-5000 odds if she was in the business for awhile? I don't think this works for calculating odds but you probably get the drift. 20 partners compared to 5,000 partners.

There's no right or wrong when it comes to personal taste (well, within the confines of consent and age of majority anyway, but I digress...) so this is in no way a criticism... I'm just curious... what about this makes you uncomfortable? In the past, I've crossed paths with a bunch of people a "civilian" ex-girlfriend of mine slept with (similar social circles) and it never occurred to me to be uncomfortable with it. Meanwhile, more currently, a 1000 people may have seen my girlfriend naked and again I don't really feel one way or the other about it. She chose me. For what it's worth, they probably wouldn't even recognise her today, in street clothes with normal make up, anyway. We all have our history.

 

[Autonomous]

No I think the odds of running into an ex of a civilian lady is much less than running into an ex client of a provider. Maybe about 20-5000 odds if she was in the business for awhile? I don't think this works for calculating odds but you probably get the drift. 20 partners compared to 5,000 partners.

I think you have the odds backwards. “Low odds" means something is likely, and "high odds" means something is unlikely, but many people get the two confused.

 

[chitown]

No I think the odds of running into an ex of a civilian lady is much less than running into an ex client of a provider. Maybe about 20-5000 odds if she was in the business for awhile? I don't think this works for calculating odds but you probably get the drift. 20 partners compared to 5,000 partners.

Your math is really questionable here. 5000 partners? Even assuming a provider sees two people a day, 365 days a year, for five years, that puts them only at 3650. And even that is a ridiculous number because no one works every single day, and clients often repeat visit, so it's not just a non-stop stream of new dicks showing up. In fact an established lady with a good reputation will more likely than not have a pool of regulars they see on a regular basis and not really see that many new people at all.

 

[Lindsey]

Yesssssss! Amen to this. Just seeing this now, but very well said.❤

 

[doctordoom]

Your math is really questionable here. 5000 partners? Even assuming a provider sees two people a day, 365 days a year, for five years, that puts them only at 3650. And even that is a ridiculous number because no one works every single day, and clients often repeat visit, so it's not just a non-stop stream of new dicks showing up. In fact an established lady with a good reputation will more likely than not have a pool of regulars they see on a regular basis and not really see that many new people at all.

Wow, I didn't mean to make so much controversy on numbers. I didn't really put much thought into, just picked a few numbers that I thought were in the ballpark. Perhaps the 5k was high, lets half it to 2.5 for argument sake. So now the odds whatever they may be of bumping into a ex with someone that has had 20 partners to someone that has 2500 partners I think is less.

 

[bdan]

I'm not going to wade through six pages of stuff I've read before but

Here it is!
If your masculinity is threatened by how many partners your significant other has had. Don't ask

Ever!

If you realize it doesn't and has NEVER mattered ... go forward.

Or don't ...

The world will keep revolving

 

[80watts]

Or no matter how many people she has slept with and she decides to be with you...... She chose you.... that should be enough. Relationships are tough and you both have to put work into it for it to be successful. You have to communicate with each other. Don['t assume that is what he/she wants, talk about it. Have goals together. Strive to be happy together.

Piece of advice: The grass is not always greener on the other side....

The unsung heroes our every society are the mothers and fathers that sacrificed alot for their kids, raising them, putting them through school, working second jobs, crawling through the mud so their kids can keep their heads above the cesspool (so the kids have a better life).

 

[creepyuncle]

How would we as pooners be viewed by our significant other, be it someone we met during or after we stop pooning?
I for one believe in looking at the future as oppose to being fixated on the past. If I am so lucky to end up with one of my special SPs, my biggest concern would be if I could keep up with the special lady!

 

[sybian]

With some women....after they've been in my bed a few times, might ask how many partners I've had.
Some you can give an estimated number......others are on a need to know basis.
....and it's easier in the long run.....if they just don't know

 

[badbadboy]

If the 'average' person in society has six sex partners in their lifetime; this subject for the majority of the clients and SP's on this site is totally irrelevant.

If an SP is considering a LTR with anyone, I would think a good partner wouldn't even look at 'numbers' but the whole person. We are not perfect people and if you have a connection with someone all that really matters is how you feel about the person now vs what they have done in the past. Cliche terms like 'living in the moment' apply.

 

[Tim22]

Growing up and living in a small town you run into exgirlfriends or exboyfriends its just a fact of life you may even work with a guy dateing your x. You cant really see a woman or man that hasnt been with somebody you know. Its just a fact of life.
So my answer would be i would date /marry the sw i have a crush on in a second . Doesnt really matter what happened in the past if you choose each other and are happy fuck the people that say anything there just jealous that there paying to see a person that you get to live laugh and love everyday with sounds great to me .

 

[sybian]

Growing up and living in a small town you run into exgirlfriends or exboyfriends its just a fact of life you may even work with a guy dateing your x. You cant really see a woman or man that hasnt been with somebody you know. Its just a fact of life.
So my answer would be i would date /marry the sw i have a crush on in a second . Doesnt really matter what happened in the past if you choose each other and are happy fuck the people that say anything there just jealous that there paying to see a person that you get to live laugh and love everyday with sounds great to me .

Yeah.....in these small interior towns, the most confusing day for most kids.....is Fathers Day.

 

[uncleg]

With some women....after they've been in my bed a few times, might ask how many partners I've had.
Some you can give an estimated number......others are on a need to know basis.
....and it's easier in the long run.....if they just don't know

........asked because you were that good or that bad ????

 

[sybian]

........asked because you were that good or that bad ????

I don't know.....but that's something to ponder.

 

[Regan Azazel]

I would marry a lady of the sheets in a heartbeat. We would be badass bitches well into our 80s. I can't think of non-sp's who are more comfortable with their sexuality and willing to explore emotions.