Life Lessons

[HappyHarryHardOn]

What happens when you become adept at shutting down your emotions? I find my experiences with sp's are not without their merit.

I seem to be getting better at compartmentalizing my feelings like they do. Always keeping in mind to separate intimacy with the mechanics of the evening. As a form of manipulation, this hobby of ours is truly Machiavellian in nature.

 

[HappyHarryHardOn]

The question you should think about HHHO, in your heart of hearts, is:

Do you want to be the kind of client for whom the SP must shut down her emotions to be able to tolerate her time with you or do you want to be the kind of client that the ladies like to see come in the door, ring their phone or drop them an email? That is entirely within your control.

Not to come off as sounding patronizing, but you do realize this hobby is a complete facade? It's just a form of entertainment, there are no real feelings here between the sp's and their clientele! The way I look at it is similar to exploring theater and acting classes, just with more of an "adult" twist.

To answer your question, it entirely depends on who your booking your time with? Some girls whom I've seen, I find there's a certain chemistry present while others there's none. Yet even if I find we have great chemistry, and we're both comfortable with each other, and we enjoy our time together, I constantly keep in mind that these experiences are not real. These are PAID fantasies.

Have no illusions about the reality of this industry, please try to keep in mind that these women are professionals. THEY ARE NOT OUR FRIENDS, OR ENEMIES, as clients we pay them to be whatever we fantasize. It's just business. That's all

 

[sevenofnine]

i kndof disagree that this hobby is just a fantasy an illussion.

the first lady i met in this, was magic, it took me years to get back to her,
but her comment was what happened to you,
we were on the same page from the beginning i needed no words.

i had a bad time in this hobby a few years ago, i asked her once did she get me,
she said perfectly,
she told me once i don't have to leave, ever,
when we got together, we did our thing that she would just invite me to stay and she told me the most intimate details of her life. she wanted to get together on the weekend and just hang out.
sorry but there was no illussion there no fantasy there, never was with me and her from the first time we met.

i see a lady now another lady i saw early on, she was like the second or third lady i saw in this, and i still see her regularly
she also told me once i never have to leave period.
with her it took along time to find out friend ship
and its alot different sort of relationship and i see her regularlly.

and she is definatly not a fantasy and illussion she is a women and a friend.
and she and me have no secrerts we talk alot about our personal life, and stay in touch no matter what.
i don't know what to say but it sure as hell is not a fantasy me and her, we share our life one evening at a time but we share our life.

i have met women in this and that is all it is a fantasy, the most fantastic sex, but didn't want to know me at all,
i have met women in this that we just didn't get each other,

my job is working with people ok i see alot of people.
and personally i think its rude not to look at people and see them whether i see them for two seconds and give them directions or our interaction is longer
but im a human being they are to whether i hold the door open for a person at the mall i want to be noticed
i am a person god damit,
and i try and do my best to see the person in the people i see all day long at work

i find it rude from an escort to see me as just dollars or a john or another guy with a cock she has to deal with,
i am a person and so is she.

the lady i see i will say it again,
she is a women, and we share our life, an evening at a time,
no fantasy about it.

 

[Robert Upndown]

Not to come off as sounding patronizing, but you do realize this hobby is a complete facade? It's just a form of entertainment, there are no real feelings here between the sp's and their clientele! The way I look at it is similar to exploring theater and acting classes, just with more of an "adult" twist.

To answer your question, it entirely depends on who your booking your time with? Some girls whom I've seen, I find there's a certain chemistry present while others there's none. Yet even if I find we have great chemistry, and we're both comfortable with each other, and we enjoy our time together, I constantly keep in mind that these experiences are not real. These are PAID fantasies.

Have no illusions about the reality of this industry, please try to keep in mind that these women are professionals. THEY ARE NOT OUR FRIENDS, OR ENEMIES, as clients we pay them to be whatever we fantasize. It's just business. That's all

I completely disagree, it is not just a business to all in this line of work. Not all can shutdown their feelings and emotions and some do not even try. Yes this is a business and many SP's can and do successfully supress their emotions and do not cross that emotional line. However, client and SP are still human and sometimes mother nature simply overrules the so called rules.

I personally have developed some very strong friendships and relations with some amazing woman over the years, who I met first as a client. I have also dated, a few for years, that I also initially met as a client. I have a beautiful daughter that was the result of a short term relationship with an SP I met in a strip bar in Calgary years ago. So you can't tell me that "this hobby of ours is truly Machiavellian in nature, because in my personal experience, that simply has not been the case.

I presently know a few local active SP's that I consider to be a close freind and remain close freinds with a few long retired SP's, a few for over 20 years. I also see some SP's that it is strictly business, but sexually we click, so we still have some great fun, checking our personal emotions at the door.

As in life, I think you get back what you put in. If you look at an SP as a woman first, and an SP second, treat it less as a business transaction and more like a very FUN time with a beautiful lady, while treating the lady with respect and manners, you just might find that not all SP's are simply "PAID fantasies", but so much more than that.

PS
I am now in my early fifties, saw my first SP when I was 18, on a one day pass when I was in the Navy and have simply never stopped seeing SP's. Certainly not all of my encounters have been stellar, many have been downright ugly, but I have some AMAZING memories of my exploits and continue as a very active participant in this hobby. I have also never been married, so that does allow me a little more freedom than most hobbyists.

 

[leoghaire]

Not to come off as sounding patronizing, but you do realize this hobby is a complete facade? It's just a form of entertainment, there are no real feelings here between the sp's and their clientele! The way I look at it is similar to exploring theater and acting classes, just with more of an "adult" twist.

To answer your question, it entirely depends on who your booking your time with? Some girls whom I've seen, I find there's a certain chemistry present while others there's none. Yet even if I find we have great chemistry, and we're both comfortable with each other, and we enjoy our time together, I constantly keep in mind that these experiences are not real. These are PAID fantasies.

Have no illusions about the reality of this industry, please try to keep in mind that these women are professionals. THEY ARE NOT OUR FRIENDS, OR ENEMIES, as clients we pay them to be whatever we fantasize. It's just business. That's all

This response makes you sound like a very sad and bitter person and I doubt that you would be much fun to be around.

 

[HappyHarryHardOn]

From kerb crawling to Internet hookups I've seen my share of action in this hobby. In all that time, I have never once invited an sp to a family outing, likewise ... neither have they, wonder why? It's because WE'RE NOT FRIENDS. However, I have publicly socialized with my barber outside of his working hours and he didn't even charge me for social time as some escorts do. Gentlemen, do you see the difference here, the separation between real life and fantasy?

In real life I am friends with my barber, or dry cleaner or plumber. What kind of relationship do you men have with escorts outside of the PAID sessions? Do you guys hang out with them, help them with their shopping, talk about the most intimate details of your lives, discuss the future plans and dreams you have for your children or other family members. Could you openly introduce them as prostitutes to your colleagues, I don't think so, social convention does not permit it. Do you even acknowledge them when you see them at a shopping mall? I'm willing to bet the answer is no.

Some of you really believe that because you have seen an escort 20 times that you're now pals and buddies? Are you fucking kidding me, I'll bet their pimps have something else to say about that. As a matter of fact, I've had long conversations with some hookers and pimps, others with cops while others with clients. It's always the client who believes the fantasy.

Perhaps I think this way due to the criminal elements which are prevalent in this industry. I don't know I kinda find it difficult to connect with an escort who may be jonesing for her next fix. Such is the brutal reality of life.

 

[the old maxx50]

Yes I think Happy harry is the one living in a fantasy .. The reality is some where in the middle between being friends with girls that work as escorts and the worst that Happy can think of .

As i have said many time I know a number of girls out side of there work , i am friends with a few , help them out , go shopping with them and have even lived with them , baby sat for them and visit them in other parts of the country .. they are just like everyone else and deserved to be respected the same way .

Just look around and you will find people you know that you may think of as the ordinary people , are drug attics , hustlers .. and some one that i would not trust . because they are not honest about what they do , .I have found most girls in the escort business are and we can be just as honest with them. I have a group of friend form the escort boards guy that are clients and girls that are escort ,, and we get along find in social setting ,and we can talk about what reality is .

If you got just a low opinion of people in the escort business , you probably don't think much of the guy that see them ether .

I .

I think if people have so much to hide and are afraid of others outing them ,, then it would be best not to partake of the sex trade pleasures
Life is not all sweet many thing can cause a bitter taste as we experience more . But also are eye our opened and our attitudes become more open minded .

Not every thing that society as been told to believe about the escort and sex trade business is true , and some is .. But it all is tempered by choses and attitudes

 

[the old maxx50]

I would like to comment every one on their writing ability
I enjoy ready well written and rounded commentary ..I am envious.
I have to whole heartedly agree with most of the positive comments But not with Happy. I guess that is evident in my own post .

 

[HappyHarryHardOn]

Different schools of thought ...

Do you guys know what a lapdog is?

 

[sevenofnine]

i just want to ad that that its a mistake to think that every women dislikes what they do, or perhaps is broken some how

i don't want to speak for women or put words in there mouth, but i have known two women quite well in this, and if they are broken then so is every other person in the human race
every person has there issuses and deals with them i think the fact that they are escorts get highlighted and guess what that is why there escorts something is wrong with them
but guess what every person has something wrong with them

and for sure there are stesses and trials and tribulations for escorts i don't imagine its easy or is for everyone.
but the women i see says she likes it likes sex. treats it almost as her social calender or a dating sight,
even likes seeing new guys and feels the thrill when her door bell rings.

certainly there are down sides to this hobby, cops and there are creeps who pretend to be men out there, i don't want to pretend its easy.
and i guess for escorts over there life time in this, things change, money the thrill of wild sex with a stranger the ego of being desired by lots and lots of guys,

i think this fades away with time and again i don't want to put words in any ones mouth, but i think as sps get older or mature in this hobby,
its enjoyable for them to have regular clients,
and i guess most important of all they look for in there clients is saftey hygiene and respect.
like i said i can manage those, and i won't brag and say im the best lover she has ever had but we do is mutual and agreed to by both of us, and i mean that,

im not sure what im trying to say, but i pay her a hell of alot of money, and i don't think its hard money at all. its pretty mutual. i may not rock her world but i don't throw rocks either,
and i think there are a few of us guys out there, and as an sp gets older, an all the thrill of this hobby is left in the past.
that is what they look forward to, spending an hour or an evening with a nice or decent guy

im not perfect nor do i think this hobby is perfect, but we try, or should try,

 

[HappyHarryHardOn]

and yes I've drank pimp beer and watched hockey games

What the hell is pimp beer?

 

[HappyHarryHardOn]

I dunno, I think that you are a bit jaded maybe?
I have had clients turn into friends, one of those friends and I and another wonderful woman are hosting a dinner party at his house and inviting girls and clients/friends who we think are cool and who would make for a fun evening.

Sounds like one of Berlusconi's famous 'bunga bunga' parties.

 

[Larry Storch]

From your "Please help" thread:

Thank you all for the help

I will be seeing a girl tonight and I'd read somewhere about tipping ... how does that work, not sure how much I should give

What happened to your first review? Sounds like things didn't go so well based on your more recent posts.
Maybe you were burned or played?
I don't have any illusions about either side of this business, but I'm not painting everyone with the same brush.

 

[HappyHarryHardOn]

From your "Please help" thread:



What happened to your first review? Sounds like things didn't go so well based on your more recent posts.
Maybe you were burned or played?
I don't have any illusions about either side of this business, but I'm not painting everyone with the same brush.

Just dealing with a crisis of conscience

 

[blazejowski]

What the hell is pimp beer?

No idea.... but I bet it gets served in this:

 

[uncleg]

Just dealing with a crisis of conscience

Try this..............................

..............should take care of conscience issues.........saves you money too.

 

[HappyHarryHardOn]

Try this..............................

..............should take care of conscience issues.........saves you money too.

Or I could focus my energies on dating civilian women

Just goes to show how incredibly lazy I am. Instead of meeting women in the real world, I opt to go with a prostie.

lazy and low self esteem, time to dig up the old Tony Robbins cd's

 

[the old maxx50]

Yes i have had my crises of conscience while seeing escorts ..and no doubt i am guilty of not listening to it .

I am see girl , on drugs , with emotional problems and personal crises of their own .. and know i should of done more some times

As it is I have done what i can for those that are in my life .. I think maybe each of uses take some advantage of the other .. but we are honest about it.

For me the so called real world is knowing and loving the escort I know.

 

[HappyHarryHardOn]

For me the so called real world is knowing and loving the escort I know.

That need for human contact can be overwhelming, especially the feeling of being held in the arms of a beautiful woman.

That's why I find that when I focus on other interests in my life, I could safely explore and grow without interruption.

 

[the old maxx50]

I have to admit that that need for connection with a women , and seeking it out .. has disrupted my life a fair bit, i It has helped me grow on one level and stopped me from growing in others. In fact i have lost interest in many of the things that i would get joy and contentment from .. Now there is very little fulfillment with out a women in my life in some capacity . Even though I have to say that none of my relationships are close to what i am looking for .. they are far more then what i have experienced through the previous 50 yrs

I know i use the word escorts to when talking about the women i know ,, I use it only here on the board . because it is the walk of life i meet them in . But it not how i look at each .. Most are not very active in the business ,, and are moving on .. My relationship with them is more social then sexual .. all though .. as a man i all way am sexual attraction to women , , not that it has to be full filled ,and it is not .