Going to swingers clubs: I've never been but I'm curious about it

[LoadShooter]

As a single guy who is not involved in the swingers or fetish community, I'm pretty curious about experiencing it. All I really know is that single guys rolling in, is a frowned upon situation. Single women and couples would be ok, but not guys. I've surfed on the fetish lifestyle website at the profiles, and found alot of the women to be more gothic and less into staying fit and healthy. Some were pretty hot and fit though.

Also, on Facebook recently, I've noticed on someone's profile they had friends that had a profile that was a couple.. like "John & Mary" as the name. I'm guessing this is sort of a standard way couples in the community keep in touch with each other on Facebook.

Can anyone fill me in on the swinger lifestyle around the city? Is there a way to get into it as a single guy..or do I basically need to find a partner to go with? Also, I'd would just be curious about the types of fun and experiences that go on there.

 

[Sphubby]

Oh oh, here we go again.

https://perb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?234354-Any-perberts-belong-to-this-club&highlight=swinger

None of the clubs are paid advertisers here so the thread gets shut down fairly quick. As said by perbmod their websites have most of the info on them. Google lifestyle or swinger club Vancouver and you will find them. Or kats or allure or eden. Only kats is single guy friends on certain nights. If you want pm me and can give more infoo.

 

[LoadShooter]

Oh oh, here we go again.

https://perb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?234354-Any-perberts-belong-to-this-club&highlight=swinger

None of the clubs are paid advertisers here so the thread gets shut down fairly quick. As said by perbmod their websites have most of the info on them. Google lifestyle or swinger club Vancouver and you will find them. Or kats or allure or eden. Only kats is single guy friends on certain nights. If you want pm me and can give more infoo.

Thanks for the reply. I wasn't however replying about a particular website or a particular club. If anyone had feedback as to what goes on at the parties in generally, that was what I was more curious about.

 

[deathreborn]

seems to be more common in the states. went to a good one in portland called the velvet rope a couple summers ago. hooked up with one of the single ladies there. it was a club type set up, not a residence.

 

[Sphubby]

Loadshooter, tried to respond to your a pm, your inbox is full.

 

[Warl0ck]

I've visited them before. Some of them can be a makeshift night club with a social area, the sex area & you bring your own alcohol. More recently I've noticed a trend to more upscale places that have theme nights (CFNM nights for instance). Google Oasis Aqualounge in Toronto. Many of them have certain nights where they allow single males. The women like fresh meat too ;-). Do understand though it's not like some porn, it's regular folks with regular bodies. And, no means no. Get aggressive or pushy and you'll probably be tossed quickly. Not everyone is a swinger either. Some women like to role play, dress up, etc and the club allows them to do it safely. So if you want to watch a chick in a spandex cat suit dance you may enjoy it.

My experience is that each club is different. Generally you'll be interviewed if you want to join. Great place to meet like minded people and a potential SO provided you don't mind some other guy doing her while you're finishing your beer.

 

[LalaniElectrica]

I actually have run literally hundreds or thousands of swinger and fetish/bdsm type style events previous to being a Perb member. Some misconceptions is it's a huge orgy. Its not a huge orgy, you need to get to know people. Making friends is the most important thing. They sometimes have areas where orgies take place, you need permission to be involved by the participants. Some participants are more interactive than others... there are soft swingers, they may only touch caress and softer activities, some people do not wish to share bodily fluids until they know you more, or they only enjoy teasing with friends. Some people want to get hard core fucked like a gangbang.

Some women want to do women-only things, basically when i was running my parties if the door was open you could watch, but you cannot join unless you are invited. If the door is closed, you do not have permission to open it. Some people are exhibitionists and only want to be seen... so basically it's a bunch of open minded regular people getting together with like-minded people getting to know each other and throughout the evening people will come and go and groups and couples will go off with each other or switch partners... In bdsm it's not about sex per se, its about sensations like sharp nails running up and down your body, control and intensity, it's a different goal in the fetish and bdsm world than in the swinger world for sure!

Tips:
~do not get too drunk at the party, lol (especially for newbies)
~be respectful at all times and get to know people on various levels, not only to get in their pants (swingers are also just normal people who want to play with their partners, rather than cheating on them)
~always ask permission to touch...

If you do all these things, are healthy, arrive super squeaky clean showered and groomed and minty fresh, you will most likely attract some play, especially if you have a good dick, lol. That being said, some clubs are into hosting height weight proportionate, and also age appropriate (to avoid 20-27 yr olds running into their parents group of friends ) so it can be picky to try to attend the right event... Keep it fun for the start and see where it takes you, make some lasting friendships so you are invited back... There are single dudes I used to invite to the parties who the ladies loved who were really jovial and great attitudes and not too grabby or expectational... It's a tight knit community from what I've experienced.

 

[Warl0ck]

I actually have run literally hundreds or thousands of swinger and fetish/bdsm type style events previous to being a Perb member. Some misconceptions is it's a huge orgy. Its not a huge orgy, you need to get to know people. Making friends is the most important thing. They sometimes have areas where orgies take place, you need permission to be involved by the participants. Some participants are more interactive than others... there are soft swingers, they may only touch caress and softer activities, some people do not wish to share bodily fluids until they know you more, or they only enjoy teasing with friends. Some people want to get hard core fucked like a gangbang.

Some women want to do women-only things, basically when i was running my parties if the door was open you could watch, but you cannot join unless you are invited. If the door is closed, you do not have permission to open it. Some people are exhibitionists and only want to be seen... so basically it's a bunch of open minded regular people getting together with like-minded people getting to know each other and throughout the evening people will come and go and groups and couples will go off with each other or switch partners... In bdsm it's not about sex per se, its about sensations like sharp nails running up and down your body, control and intensity, it's a different goal in the fetish and bdsm world than in the swinger world for sure!

Tips:
~do not get too drunk at the party, lol (especially for newbies)
~be respectful at all times and get to know people on various levels, not only to get in their pants (swingers are also just normal people who want to play with their partners, rather than cheating on them)
~always ask permission to touch...

If you do all these things, are healthy, arrive super squeaky clean showered and groomed and minty fresh, you will most likely attract some play, especially if you have a good dick, lol. That being said, some clubs are into hosting height weight proportionate, and also age appropriate (to avoid 20-27 yr olds running into their parents group of friends ) so it can be picky to try to attend the right event... Keep it fun for the start and see where it takes you, make some lasting friendships so you are invited back... There are single dudes I used to invite to the parties who the ladies loved who were really jovial and great attitudes and not too grabby or expectational... It's a tight knit community from what I've experienced.

Well said. I'd love to meet my Dad at a swinger club. Solely for the "WTF" on both sides.

 

[johnA27]

I actually have run literally hundreds or thousands of swinger and fetish/bdsm type style events previous to being a Perb member. Some misconceptions is it's a huge orgy. Its not a huge orgy, you need to get to know people. Making friends is the most important thing. They sometimes have areas where orgies take place, you need permission to be involved by the participants. Some participants are more interactive than others... there are soft swingers, they may only touch caress and softer activities, some people do not wish to share bodily fluids until they know you more, or they only enjoy teasing with friends. Some people want to get hard core fucked like a gangbang.

Some women want to do women-only things, basically when i was running my parties if the door was open you could watch, but you cannot join unless you are invited. If the door is closed, you do not have permission to open it. Some people are exhibitionists and only want to be seen... so basically it's a bunch of open minded regular people getting together with like-minded people getting to know each other and throughout the evening people will come and go and groups and couples will go off with each other or switch partners... In bdsm it's not about sex per se, its about sensations like sharp nails running up and down your body, control and intensity, it's a different goal in the fetish and bdsm world than in the swinger world for sure!

Tips:
~do not get too drunk at the party, lol (especially for newbies)
~be respectful at all times and get to know people on various levels, not only to get in their pants (swingers are also just normal people who want to play with their partners, rather than cheating on them)
~always ask permission to touch...

If you do all these things, are healthy, arrive super squeaky clean showered and groomed and minty fresh, you will most likely attract some play, especially if you have a good dick, lol. That being said, some clubs are into hosting height weight proportionate, and also age appropriate (to avoid 20-27 yr olds running into their parents group of friends ) so it can be picky to try to attend the right event... Keep it fun for the start and see where it takes you, make some lasting friendships so you are invited back... There are single dudes I used to invite to the parties who the ladies loved who were really jovial and great attitudes and not too grabby or expectational... It's a tight knit community from what I've experienced.

That's pretty interesting to know. I do hear a lot of first time goers end up just being spectators, most people probably don't actually want to jump in right away, even single horny guys may not feel comfortable jumping into an orgy.

I doubt I am attactive enough or have a nice enough cock to be able to participate in a swingers club as a single male =( unless you say otherwise Lalani *wink*

 

[Warl0ck]

That's pretty interesting to know. I do hear a lot of first time goers end up just being spectators, most people probably don't actually want to jump in right away, even single horny guys may not feel comfortable jumping into an orgy.

I doubt I am attactive enough or have a nice enough cock to be able to participate in a swingers club as a single male =( unless you say otherwise Lalani *wink*

I'd be happy to take you John. No charge.

 

[johnA27]

I'd be happy to take you John. No charge.

Lol really warlock, dont think we've interacted much directly here so don't think you would think very much of me. I am flattered.

 

[encarsia]

I have been to several swing events. Both had open nights that allowed singles and many theme events. Im a bi male so not hung or height weight normal. I have had many encounters from starting out with foreplay and eatiing pussy to fucking sharing. If you go with a good attitide and dont come off as a perv creap you will get lots of fun interaction. Also if you g back on a regular bassis many will make you as a friend and play outside the club.

 

[Warl0ck]

I have been to several swing events. Both had open nights that allowed singles and many theme events. Im a bi male so not hung or height weight normal. I have had many encounters from starting out with foreplay and eatiing pussy to fucking sharing. If you go with a good attitide and dont come off as a perv creap you will get lots of fun interaction. Also if you g back on a regular bassis many will make you as a friend and play outside the club.

Yeah, it's a social club and not a place if you are awkward. If you can't engage a woman at a coffee shop you likely won't at a swingers club. Not everyone is a swinger either. Exhibitionism is commonplace as are bisexual partners. Sometimes it's just a good place to go when a couple wants to experiment. A swingers bar is a MUCH better place to play than finding someone in a club or on the internet.

 

[johnA27]

Yeah, it's a social club and not a place if you are awkward. If you can't engage a woman at a coffee shop you likely won't at a swingers club. Not everyone is a swinger either. Exhibitionism is commonplace as are bisexual partners. Sometimes it's just a good place to go when a couple wants to experiment. A swingers bar is a MUCH better place to play than finding someone in a club or on the internet.

So you're saying the best way to start is just to be social, enjoy a drink, enjoy the scenery, and talk and be interesting? Then maybe eventually someone will offer sex but don't expect it? Take it as a night out to be social?

 

[Warl0ck]

So you're saying the best way to start is just to be social, enjoy a drink, enjoy the scenery, and talk and be interesting? Then maybe eventually someone will offer sex but don't expect it? Take it as a night out to be social?

Yes. It's a social club that allows sexual interaction. You still have to talk your way into a woman's pants (even if she isn't wearing any).

 

[johnA27]

Yes. It's a social club that allows sexual interaction. You still have to talk your way into a woman's pants (even if she isn't wearing any).

So I guess you just kinda chat and watch with no intention of being fucked for the night, and don't be surprised if you leave without getting fucked? Are you usually allowed to relieve yourself in the bathroom or something at least?

Tho the problem still remains how hard it is to get in as a single male. Seems like you'd still have to have dashing looks, otherwise how would us average joes get in?

Also, the application seems like you'd have to give quite a bit of personal information. How safe is it?

 

[Warl0ck]

So I guess you just kinda chat and watch with no intention of being fucked for the night, and don't be surprised if you leave without getting fucked? Are you usually allowed to relieve yourself in the bathroom or something at least?

Tho the problem still remains how hard it is to get in as a single male. Seems like you'd still have to have dashing looks, otherwise how would us average joes get in?

Also, the application seems like you'd have to give quite a bit of personal information. How safe is it?

Clubs will have "young" nights where they only permit men under a specific age. If you join a club you'll be interviewed by the owner to see if you are a fit. I don't frequent the places anymore but looks were never an issue. They're more interested in if you're a stable normal person that's not a creeper.

I think porn draws an incorrect version of the swinger club. Guys imagine you walk in, drop your pants and 20 hot chicks race over to you and seduce you. It's not like that. Go over and look at the website of Oasis AquaLounge in Toronto. I believe they are a Terb advertiser. They have videos and codes of conduct. Each club is different. Rule 1 is No Means No.

 

[wetnose]

I have been to several swing events. Both had open nights that allowed singles and many theme events. Im a bi male so not hung or height weight normal. I have had many encounters from starting out with foreplay and eatiing pussy to fucking sharing. If you go with a good attitide and dont come off as a perv creap you will get lots of fun interaction. Also if you g back on a regular bassis many will make you as a friend and play outside the club.

Which clubs are your favorite?

 

[deathreborn]

the interviewing thing is more for the residential clubs. i've been to 3 building specific clubs. Velvet Rope in Portland, Thads in San Diego and Red Rooster in Las Vegas. None required an interview. You just pay your fee and go in. Can be pricey though especially in USD.

 

[escapefromstress]

Something else you could try is hiring a SP to go with you to a club. You'll probably get accepted in more easily as a couple than a single guy, and have someone experienced to play with while you're there.