I disagree. Even though the businesses are fundamentally different, the process/concept of booking an appointment remains the same. Whether it's an appointment to get your teeth cleaned or your nob polished, the fact remains that an agreed upon segment of time has been set aside for the exchange of services for reimbursement. And that missing an appointment is rude and disrespectful whether it's the dentist, the pooner, the patient or the sp. Do we expect a higher level of flakiness in the world of escorting? Of course, but that doesn't make it any less inappropriate.
First off...
- Thread starter Creole Lady Marmalade
- Start date
It happens...
I wouldn't usually bother saying anything about this crap but since there's a thread going I'll hop on to rant/vent.
I had a client call at 8pm tonight for an appt ASAP. I asked him to call back in 10 min's. I changed my plans for the night because he wanted a 2 hour session which is good money and he sounded like fun.
He called back, we booked for 9pm. (He was calling long distance, which is common for guys from out of town, but the point is that it cost him to call me and it cost me to call him).
At 9:20pm when he hadn't shown up I called and he said he was having trouble finding the place, but he didn't even have the street name right...?
I gave him the info again and expressed my displeasure (I am a Domme afterall). He called me again about 5 min's later asking about parking.
It's now 9:53pm and he's not here, no other phone call.
WTF?
Was he was a prankster, a flake or someone with mental problems that now knows where I live and enjoys screwing with me? Someone who never intended on showing up in the first place?
Guys, sp's deal with this shit all the time, so cut them/us some slack. It's the business and it goes both ways.
I wouldn't usually bother saying anything about this crap but since there's a thread going I'll hop on to rant/vent.
I had a client call at 8pm tonight for an appt ASAP. I asked him to call back in 10 min's. I changed my plans for the night because he wanted a 2 hour session which is good money and he sounded like fun.
He called back, we booked for 9pm. (He was calling long distance, which is common for guys from out of town, but the point is that it cost him to call me and it cost me to call him).
At 9:20pm when he hadn't shown up I called and he said he was having trouble finding the place, but he didn't even have the street name right...?
I gave him the info again and expressed my displeasure (I am a Domme afterall). He called me again about 5 min's later asking about parking.
It's now 9:53pm and he's not here, no other phone call.
WTF?
Was he was a prankster, a flake or someone with mental problems that now knows where I live and enjoys screwing with me? Someone who never intended on showing up in the first place?
Guys, sp's deal with this shit all the time, so cut them/us some slack. It's the business and it goes both ways.
My results---NO OBLIGATION!!!
I have entertained the possibility that it was a deliberate attempt at making me look foolish however two things to consider
a) I tried the new booking policy (appointment is confirmed at the time of request) that Wednesday (September 26) morning and well before the disciplined procedure was active for 4+ years, so I basically went back to the old method that I started the business with and used for about 6 months this time for 4+ days.
b) This distinguished PERBert has seen two SPs, one of which I have a personal relationship with, the other a firm association with. The client/PERBert was well referenced and also not into playing games. I don’t think it’s premeditated as he has also PMd me on several occasions for a couple of years in admiration.
I’ve now been told, he had seen that associate of mine for 2 hours at the time he wanted me to see me using the experimental policy and has posted since and possibly on the thread that was axed, though I can’t be sure as I was preoccupied in frying a member throwing out some unsubstantiated claims about me.
Since Wednesday (September 26) I had decided to hybridize my day in booking policies, my way or the clients preferred way as detailed in recent threads (appointment is conceded as confirmed at the time of request). What I have found is that not only did my booking guideline yield more appointments but that it didn’t discriminate whether or not they had found my listing online through various directories and review boards or by print.
The method in which appointments were good to go at time of request to occur hours or days ahead yielded not one booking. To be sure I did this properly I didn’t ask for a confirmation call instead took their name and desired time down but left out the address (funny thing is not one person asked for the address). I left it all to faith. I also noticed that upon asking where they have come to find my contact number, they were either from directories (I specifically asked what ones) or the print ad.
After my first day of doom I had posted my experience. Neutral sympathy for the client who had not confirmed our appointment. A few have had to say that there may have been mitigating circumstances preventing him seeing me. I would have accepted that had I not known about the my associates visit with him at the time we were to be together. Others were more accusatory painting the client as responsible. After reading your comments that it occurred to me...
No one is responsible for a missed opportunity at the confirmation standpoint. A SP isn’t responsible for not picking up the phone to confirm just as the client that “stood me up” isn’t responsible to call me to confirm. We’ve confused courtesy for responsibility. In either case you can’t force someone to dial the phone or pick it up on the other end. It’s no ones fault. There is no obligation from either side unless there is a deposit of sorts.
That being said, we should all take a breather on calling each other flakes. If appointments are to be confirmed and the other party isn’t successful, there could very well be a good reason for it, a reason that is none of our business. However if there is an opportunity to reach the other party after the failed attempt, again it’s not just out of responsibility but courtesy, to inform.
I also move to have SPs consider booking on short term notice if confirmations become a problem. Again, you don’t have an obligation to pick it up, it is just desired. If your confirmation has been blown, then it’s up to you to contact the client and discuss alternate arrangements, that is if you intend on staying alive in this business.
As for those that had insulted me, perhaps that I finally got what was coming to me, I’m afraid not. I was duped when I tried the booking method most of you applauded. It doesn’t work for everyone and I would love to know precisely what those SPs are doing to make those clients inevitably call to confirm ultimately taking the responsibility onto themselves. So as it stands, my record remains intact, when the policy I've developed over the years, is used
To correct you and many others, I don't defend SPs booking policies because I don't know their policies. I do however inquire if all steps were taken before the let down.
I have entertained the possibility that it was a deliberate attempt at making me look foolish however two things to consider
a) I tried the new booking policy (appointment is confirmed at the time of request) that Wednesday (September 26) morning and well before the disciplined procedure was active for 4+ years, so I basically went back to the old method that I started the business with and used for about 6 months this time for 4+ days.
b) This distinguished PERBert has seen two SPs, one of which I have a personal relationship with, the other a firm association with. The client/PERBert was well referenced and also not into playing games. I don’t think it’s premeditated as he has also PMd me on several occasions for a couple of years in admiration.
I’ve now been told, he had seen that associate of mine for 2 hours at the time he wanted me to see me using the experimental policy and has posted since and possibly on the thread that was axed, though I can’t be sure as I was preoccupied in frying a member throwing out some unsubstantiated claims about me.
Since Wednesday (September 26) I had decided to hybridize my day in booking policies, my way or the clients preferred way as detailed in recent threads (appointment is conceded as confirmed at the time of request). What I have found is that not only did my booking guideline yield more appointments but that it didn’t discriminate whether or not they had found my listing online through various directories and review boards or by print.
The method in which appointments were good to go at time of request to occur hours or days ahead yielded not one booking. To be sure I did this properly I didn’t ask for a confirmation call instead took their name and desired time down but left out the address (funny thing is not one person asked for the address). I left it all to faith. I also noticed that upon asking where they have come to find my contact number, they were either from directories (I specifically asked what ones) or the print ad.
After my first day of doom I had posted my experience. Neutral sympathy for the client who had not confirmed our appointment. A few have had to say that there may have been mitigating circumstances preventing him seeing me. I would have accepted that had I not known about the my associates visit with him at the time we were to be together. Others were more accusatory painting the client as responsible. After reading your comments that it occurred to me...
No one is responsible for a missed opportunity at the confirmation standpoint. A SP isn’t responsible for not picking up the phone to confirm just as the client that “stood me up” isn’t responsible to call me to confirm. We’ve confused courtesy for responsibility. In either case you can’t force someone to dial the phone or pick it up on the other end. It’s no ones fault. There is no obligation from either side unless there is a deposit of sorts.
That being said, we should all take a breather on calling each other flakes. If appointments are to be confirmed and the other party isn’t successful, there could very well be a good reason for it, a reason that is none of our business. However if there is an opportunity to reach the other party after the failed attempt, again it’s not just out of responsibility but courtesy, to inform.
I also move to have SPs consider booking on short term notice if confirmations become a problem. Again, you don’t have an obligation to pick it up, it is just desired. If your confirmation has been blown, then it’s up to you to contact the client and discuss alternate arrangements, that is if you intend on staying alive in this business.
As for those that had insulted me, perhaps that I finally got what was coming to me, I’m afraid not. I was duped when I tried the booking method most of you applauded. It doesn’t work for everyone and I would love to know precisely what those SPs are doing to make those clients inevitably call to confirm ultimately taking the responsibility onto themselves. So as it stands, my record remains intact, when the policy I've developed over the years, is used
Short version for the other blondes on the board-READERS DIGEST VERSION OF CLM
This post wasn't actually to complain about a missed appointment. It was to prove the point that there is a double standard. She posted it knowing that the general reaction of the perb community would be "let the dude of the hook CLM geez!"
And she is thinking..."well...ya say that but if it happened to you guys...you write 22 pages about sps....what gives??? "
Did I decode CLM language properly my large breasted friend??
This post wasn't actually to complain about a missed appointment. It was to prove the point that there is a double standard. She posted it knowing that the general reaction of the perb community would be "let the dude of the hook CLM geez!"
And she is thinking..."well...ya say that but if it happened to you guys...you write 22 pages about sps....what gives??? "Did I decode CLM language properly my large breasted friend??
If that was her point then she failed miserably. She is the last sp who should start a thread like this.This post wasn't actually to complain about a missed appointment. It was to prove the point that there is a double standard. She posted it knowing that the general reaction of the perb community would be "let the dude of the hook CLM geez!"
I'm actually surprised that this thread isn't 22 pages of LOL's and "told you so's".
O.K. let's...
see if I get this right. Called to make an appointment, you got ready, called him to confirm, no answer no appointment. Now you find out he was with another SP while he was to be with you. At no point did he bother to call to explain. Not seeing the guy is not a bother, being out of pocket is, him not having the courtesy to call is. I'd say you got a right to be pissed, even if only because he wasted your time. Would your feelings have been hurt if he called to cancel and told you it was because he was booking with somebody else ?
see if I get this right. Called to make an appointment, you got ready, called him to confirm, no answer no appointment. Now you find out he was with another SP while he was to be with you. At no point did he bother to call to explain. Not seeing the guy is not a bother, being out of pocket is, him not having the courtesy to call is. I'd say you got a right to be pissed, even if only because he wasted your time. Would your feelings have been hurt if he called to cancel and told you it was because he was booking with somebody else ?
I would say that it's primarily to prove that her method of booking supposedly ends up in less no shows; ergo, it must be better. It's kind of pointless as every woman is free to conduct her business the way she wants and also misses the point, as I see it at least, of what most of the debates have revolved around.This post wasn't actually to complain about a missed appointment. It was to prove the point that there is a double standard. She posted it knowing that the general reaction of the perb community would be "let the dude of the hook CLM geez!"
As for the double standard argument, I would say that CLM didn't get more sympathy not because she's an SP and there's a double standard, but more due to the fact that it's CLM, so less people are inclined to sympathize with her specifically.
I also always thought there were threads in the past where an SP complained about a no-show and the perbs would commiserate as much as when it's the other way around. Could be wrong though.
To the contrary Miss TTT...And she is thinking..."well...ya say that but if it happened to you guys...you write 22 pages about sps....what gives???
When a thread reaches 22 pages, it can be safely assumed that 19 to 21 pages of the thread can be attributed to CLM's meanderings, with your tacit approval...
I mean a hybridized day, please...
Lol
Aww whatever though...it's perb....it takes all kinds! We're all pretty bonkers!
PS- I hear she likes it when clients block their numbers, call her from payphones or text message her....that's how to book properly with CLM LOL
AGREED! As one of CLMs friends I will completely agree she is one big wind bag with giant knockers! Just be glad she doesn't have your personal number because she bugs the hell out of me when she rants to me in person
Aww whatever though...it's perb....it takes all kinds! We're all pretty bonkers!
PS- I hear she likes it when clients block their numbers, call her from payphones or text message her....that's how to book properly with CLM LOL
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I had booked this client under the preferred PERBerts guideline of appointment confirmed once requested. You see, it would appear at least to me in recent threads that if the person who had asked to have a confirmation call and didn't answer, that it was their responsibility. I just don't see it. I don't see how it's anybodies responsibility. You're obligated to visit your doctor/dentist/lawyer, unless you cancel in time otherwise you would get charged for the visit. You don't get the same policy with SPs, unless they ask for a deposit or have pre-paid.
I've had many, many clients call to cancel, both established and prospective and I've had nothing but respect for those who have had the courtesy to call. I've given more props to those who have requested an appointment that was not yet confirmed that they have had to pull out (no pun intended), I mean they weren't obligated to contact me to tell me that they couldn't make it. And that's at the confirmation step.
Where is the obligation for the client to make the call to confirm? Where is the obligation for the SP to answer the confirmation call? The answer is no one is owed anything.
My feelings aren't hurt because he chose to see my colleague and that he didn't have the courtesy to call, this was just an experiment with my time and space as subject. I got my answer and he left a message on my voicemail an hour ago...
It was natural to be offended that people would take a stab at all SPs at a general standpoint. However, I haven't alluded to what you're suggesting. I've merely posted my experiences in those threads. If people were to ask about how I book I tell them how I book. As said before...aznboi9 said:
Creole Lady Marmalade 07-07-2007 said:
I got sympathy as well as an explanation as to why the client didn't pick up the phone.aznboi9 said:
And I was one of possibly many, who had started a thread asking ones opinion of appointments being confirmed or not. A guy went ballistic when he made his way over a great distance when I had initially asked him to call before coming (again, no pun intended). So it's my problem the spazz didn't listen?aznboi9 said:
Actually it's "hybridize my day in booking policies, my way or the clients preferred way as detailed in recent threads (appointment is conceded as confirmed at the time of request). "hunsperger said:
I'd ask for you to empathize but I don't see that happening, so really what are you criticizing here? Only one way to know for sure H, take a walk on my stillettos well at least book the appoinments for me.
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I would disagree. While it’s all very well and good that you put the disclaimer, it doesn’t change the fact that the referred post still makes a comparison between booking policies showing how your policy yielded a higher number of appointments during your hybridized period.
Regardless of whether it was deliberate or not, the implied conclusion is pretty easy to make. So, yes, you did allude to it. Since you went through all the trouble to include it in your post, it’s hard to believe it wasn’t, at the very least, in the back of your mind when writing it.
I know. I was just responding to TTT’s double standard statement. She was implying that there is a double standard applied when pooners miss appointments as opposed to SP’s which is why you didn’t more support from perberts about your no-show versus, say, athaire. I was saying no, that it was probably just you. I didn’t say it was right, as I don’t believe that; but it is my observation.
No, and that wasn’t my point; so I don’t know what you’re supposed to be asking.
And I think that you are missing the point somewhat, as the previous booking debates did not really centre around what was preferred or what was better; but, rather, what were appropriate expectations and courtesies when booking appointments. At least that’s how I’ve read it.
Happy Thanksgiving
Good GOD
Can this not be put to rest
I am one of those that do book on initial email/call and NO I do not have more no shows than others. I cannot comment on your "experiement" or you experience with it, however I can say that if no one should up, I would have been out of business a year ago..and that isn't the case.
This has been going on for months and months.
My thought!
Check with the lady! Check with the reviews! AND communicate.
If CLM wants confirmation for confirmation and you are not comfortable, visit another lady. On the flipside of that if you appreciate the double checking - GO FOR IT
CLM, my only concern when you post regarding other SP's who have missed appointments is that you tend to generalize. Several ladies do not have second confirmations in place ( other than calling on arrival to area to get final address) and I know myself do not appreciate other's suggesting they know my policies etc.
While TTT is right, most ladies do not conduct this business as they would any other, there are many that do.
If you have seen threads regarding no shows, being late etc, it is up to you as the client to decide if you want to make the appointment.
Simple...or maybe not??
Can this not be put to rest
I am one of those that do book on initial email/call and NO I do not have more no shows than others. I cannot comment on your "experiement" or you experience with it, however I can say that if no one should up, I would have been out of business a year ago..and that isn't the case.
This has been going on for months and months.
My thought!
Check with the lady! Check with the reviews! AND communicate.
If CLM wants confirmation for confirmation and you are not comfortable, visit another lady. On the flipside of that if you appreciate the double checking - GO FOR IT
CLM, my only concern when you post regarding other SP's who have missed appointments is that you tend to generalize. Several ladies do not have second confirmations in place ( other than calling on arrival to area to get final address) and I know myself do not appreciate other's suggesting they know my policies etc.
While TTT is right, most ladies do not conduct this business as they would any other, there are many that do.
If you have seen threads regarding no shows, being late etc, it is up to you as the client to decide if you want to make the appointment.
Simple...or maybe not??
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Whoa! What?Can this not be put to rest
I am one of those that do book on initial email/call and NO I do not have more no shows than others. I cannot comment on your "experiement" or you experience with it, however I can say that if no one should up, I would have been out of business a year ago..and that isn't the case.
This has been going on for months and months.
My thought!
Check with the lady! Check with the reviews! AND communicate.
If CLM wants confirmation for confirmation and you are not comfortable, visit another lady. On the flipside of that if you appreciate the double checking - GO FOR IT
CLM, my only concern when you post regarding other SP's who have missed appointments is that you tend to generalize. Several ladies do not have second confirmations in place ( other than calling on arrival to area to get final address) and I know myself do not appreciate other's suggesting they know my policies etc.
While TTT is right, most ladies do not conduct this business as they would any other, there are many that do.
If you have seen threads regarding no shows, being late etc, it is up to you as the client to decide if you want to make the appointment.
Simple...or maybe not??
I double confirm?
I believe I've made clear on sevaral occasions that I'm not familiar with SPs booking policies. Even those that are very close to me am I reluctant to make the claim I do.
I can only observe and make references to my own.
Whoa! What?
I double confirm?
I believe I've made clear on sevaral occasions that I'm not familiar with SPs booking policies. Even those that are very close to me am I reluctant to make the claim I do.
I can only observe and make references to my own.
Honestly, if I wanted to spend the energy finding the threads where you defend no show Sp's by reason of " did you get a confirmation call" I would. I have no desire to do that, however I am certain on many occassions you have suggested what the "norm is"
I have no desire to argue with you...honestly and my point was it is entirely up to you, how you control your appointments. I do not require the 1 hour before confirmation as I stated.
For example... Gent "A" emails me and says
Aynia I would like to see you on Monday at 11am. If I am open, I do respond and ask him to confirm with a return email that I will see him at that time.
Usually that comes on the same day of booking and can be as far as a week out. I then tell him, I will see them at 11 on Monday and to please call when in the area and I will get them the rest of the way here.
That is why I said "double" confirmation.
REGARDLESS, my main point is this has been beaten to death I am sure your site is clear with policies and I would think most ladies communicate thiers...can we not just put it to rest
I agree with you however when someone posts a thread and says how disappointed they are with not being able to get together with their SP choice then there is hardly an argument that the issue has been or needs to be put to rest, with or without my input.
Why not try to figure a solution out by looking at the root of the problem?
My point! I don't see the problem...never have, my procedures work fine, and while I get no shows ( as we all do) it is not at some record breaking pace.
Here is where I step out, I really have no desire to go back and fourth and was simply stating my thoughts....
Honesly, whatever works for you.... great... onward and upward!
I think you have mistaken my point to post this thread and the results that came from it.
This wasn't part of the grand scheme to get SPs to use my policy. That wasn't it at all! You even had the balls to criticize me for sharing how I conduct, and in no way was it even a suggestion, yet you do the same thing in this thread. This was to see just how the attitudes change when the issue has been reversed. I got my answer and something else.
My answer was that people were very quick to paint the PERBert as the ungracious, one balking on his responsibilities to me.
The "something else" was that I realized that the silent absent PERBert didn't have an obligation to pick up the phone to confirm our appointment booked in the manner many preferred and endorsed. An SP doesn't have the obligation to pick up the phone to confirm the appointment, only assuming there isn't a retainer of some sort even then there could be mitigating circumstances but depending on the SP what she does with the retainer.
I don't know how many peoples names I jotted down when requesting a time to meet, but all had not returned a call to at least get the address to where they were going. So what obligation did those fellows have when they called, book a time and not call back get more info on whereabouts? And before anyone can say I must've lead the closing of the sale by saying "call back to confirm", nope, I politely took their names, and their requested times. Couldn't have been simpler.
I'm not trying to push a system that has worked for me I was trying to see what made people feel the way they did. People on PERB often feel the need to place blame on someone if things don't go smoothly. It happened to the SP that Pantsnake tried to book with and it happened to me, well the PERBert that tried to book with me.
Have we all become so lazy that we would just hold someone accountable without having investigated the matter or dissected evidence? If you don't, someone could really get hurt in the process. Pantsnake did a good thing in not revealing the SPs name, it could've been a cyber blood bath if he had.
I have chimed in on threads where appointments were a miss but if I hadn't asked, in some cases, a SPs business could've really been affected by it. That's not about to change. I think it was about 4 threads I've contributed to: VanIsleLisa, TTT, Carmen that I remember off hand. I know this business can seem cuttthroat for some SPs but it needn't be, we can co-exist and support one another.
By the way, I haven't had no shows with the way I usually book, outside of my experiment, and hope I don't in the future.
What a pointless exercise. It's not about obligations (aside from the aspect of an SP running her own business); it's about etiquette, what is rude and thoughtless behaviour. You've been the only one steering the discussion to appointment protocol.
