Crablouse

[KITT]

Here's a nice little ditty about one of our favorite tag along friends....
I just thought it was funny.
Any other songs about such disgusting things like STD's?

Crablouse

by Lords Of Acid

I wanna talk to you about forbidden pleasures of the flesh
The most thrilling satisfaction for all mankind
Better than everything you ever imagined in your wildest dreams

The secret of the crablouse
Here's a message for the girls about vaginas
And the consequence of fiddling with a partner
Mind your labia they're never out of danger
If you're gonna go to bed with a stranger
Creatures might be hidden in his pubic area
It's the crablouse that's out to get ya!
It's gonna grab you by the pubic hair
Shake your pussy when the bastard's there

It's there to stay, sucks all day
It's there to bite, my parasite

The little vampire, horny and so greedy
It doesn't care about a penis and it's envy
It's intelligent, nasty and it's sick
A party animal, a pervert and a pig
If a crablouse gets mixed up in your saliva
Stumbles through your body right into your vulva
Then waits patiently until a penetration
Gets it out of there and right into salvation

It's there to stay, sucks all day
It's there to bite, my parasite

Now we know the little crablouse is a raver
You can't get rid of it unless you use a razor
It's unbearable, funky and so cool
A real smartass and nobody's fool
If you meet a guy who's scratching at his totem
We all know that it's connected with his scrotum
He might tell you that his undie is too tight
But you'll know that it's the crablouse and you're right

It's there to stay, sucks all day
It's there to bite, my parasite
My love machine, my maddest dream
Turns me on, makes me come

 

[Massagegirl]

No but detachable penis is worth a laugh, I thought it was by Primus, but it's also done by King Missile.

I woke up this morning with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
It's detachable.

This comes in handy a lot of the time.
I can leave it home, when I think it's gonna get me in trouble,
or I can rent it out, when I don't need it.
But now and then I go to a party, get drunk,
and the next morning I can't for the life of me
remember what I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment, and I couldn't find it.
So I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn't seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
'cause for some reason I leave it there sometimes
But not this time.
So I told them if it pops up to let me know.
I called a few people who were at the party,
but they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate.
I really don't like being without my penis for too long.
It makes me feel like less of a man,
and I really hate having to sit down every time I take a leak.
After a few hours of searching the house,
and calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
so I went to the Kiev, and ate breakfast.
Then, as I walked down Second Avenue towards St. Mark's Place,
where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket
next to a broken toaster oven.
Some guy was selling it.
I had to buy it off him.
He wanted twenty-two bucks, but I talked him down to seventeen.
I took it home, washed it off,
and put it back on. I was happy again. Complete.
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached,
but I don't know.
Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis.