Caught feelings - what do you do?

[Once you go black]

Step back , cold turkey .

Stop going for 2-3 months , your head will clear .

Dont say anything , not necessary, she doesn’t even want that awkwardness.
If she texts , politely let her know life has been busy .
if you get sentimental , go see another sp you have some history with but one w more like a female buddy / fuck buddy vibe .

Some Hang time w friends never hurts .

Your feelings will pass and this will pass cause you’re not really in a relationship.

When it does , one day you’ll know you can see her again , when you do , it will be way better than now and more fun again .

You’ll be on the same page again , she will sense your intense feelings have calmed down and she’ll be able to relax and go back to being like it was when you met .
Back to Fun , no emotional expectations, just fun vibes .

Someone should link all the former posts about this subject and link it in the sticky threads ,
There have been many .

You aren’t the first , you won’t be the last , you are not even the first to fall for her .
She’s probably not judging ,
odds are likely she does truly appreciate you as a client and may even enjoy your company ( professionally speaking ) over the norm that she see’s ,
and would like this faze to pass as much as you would .

Step back , give it some time to cool .

 

[Jim Morrison]

I'd just like to say there's been some great responses in this thread..
Ironically not one SP has offered there perspective...isn't that interesting..
The gal that told me about the nasty tasting cum also shared " she's only in it for the money 💰 💰 💰.. 💯
And not every guy is prince charming..
Sure if they muster there way through an unpleasant or unattractive date they can just never book them again but can you imagine..
Being a male SP and having some fkng monster show up, fat, with acne, foul body odor or gross perfume saying they want you to eat their pussy, and tongue fk their asshole till they gush all over your face... 🤮 🤮 🤮 Dental dam or not...even with a 1000 showers, douches, and enemas prior.. NOT A FKN CHANCE IN HELL would I subject myself to that ever in a million fkn years !!!
I remember 1 girl telling me about a guy who showed up with a micro penis and the condoms she had were to big and it was weird..forget all the details..she blocked him but he booked under a different #...
Point is I can't imagine some of the fkd up scenarios they deal with..even for the 1 unpleasant time before blocking the client from future service..
I found a awesome East Indian provider at an agency who blocked me from service cause my dick was to big and hurt her the previous date..and I really liked her, and was an awesome fk ! Man I was disappointed but oh well moved on and found another...theres always new fk toys on the horizon..
We are just money to SPs, and hey if were good looking, we click, and have nice chemistry cool..all the better for them
We get great service, they get cash...
THATS IT !!! ITS TRANSACTIONAL !!!
ITS THE BUSINESS OF PLEASURE!!!
Oldest profession on the planet since the dawn of time...
That's it !!!
And in the immortal words of Bugs FKN Bunny..
("stuttering like a muthrfukr") Thhhhats all folks...
Happy bangin 😁

 

[jjm86]

Appreciate the comment about no SPs commenting

We are work to them no more, start seeing someone new and youll see she'll run the same sweet lines on you
Or get an AI / robot gf if you are feeling lonely

I've been seeing an SP consistently for about a year at an AMP. I went from seeing her once a month to lately once a week. She's really kind to me and I do everything I can to be a great client for her. She's always happy to see me and we have great physical chemistry but we've just never found our social stride in that time. Talking is downright awkward even though there's a lot of trust and connection physically. I realized today that I've created a weird fantasy around her in my mind and I think I'm subtly (I hope subtly!) forcing a type of intimacy on her that she doesn't want.

My problem is that I don't know what to do. I realize I'm the dummy for turning this into something bigger in my head when she was just doing her job! Do I just have to stop seeing this person? I'm so attracted to her that it breaks my brain, and obviously I don't want to stop going! But I genuinely can't perform lately because of the fantasy version that's not happening and my self-judgement about it all. It's like I'm torturing myself and I'm so in my head about it.

Surely this has happened to some gents before - a sort of unrequited desire for more intimacy and care. Is the solution to go cold turkey? Do I book a session just to talk to her and let her know I caught feelings and I'm sorry and that's why I won't be back? I've really lost perspective on this. Any help is appreciated!

Ask to see her without compensation

The way she looks at you with confusion or doesnt respond to your text

That should snap you back to reality

The sad part is she knows you like her, she can see it in your eyes, hear it in your voice.
She'll continue manipulating you, until things fizzle out

 

[GeeBeeP]

The problem is you are loyal to one SP, build a roster, then youll see things from their perspective.

They didnt get into this career field to have their Pretty woman fantasy come true.

Dude book another provider, itll help you understand the connection is strictly transactional,
Have you paid for every session?
Has she ever offered to see you outside of work?
Is the effort mutual? She texts you thru the day to see how you are, to share a funny meme

Yep, the OP needs to see a couple of other well reviewed GFE providers. Once you see several quality SP’s you realise just how good they are at building that “connection” and making you feel great. Every great SP feels like she could become your girlfriend, but it's an illusion. That’s why they’re pros.

I’ve said this before. The best SP’s are the best character actors in the freaking world, in addition to their sexual skills. And we lucky pooners are the beneficiary of their talents.

 

[Tsubame]

This is definately not a suggestion for OP. The exact opposite actually.

Some guys book SPs for short getaways or hotel stay-cations. Unless it goes terribly, a little closeness must develope. Eating meals together, sightseeing, entertainment, sex in a couple type setting. Mostly just fantasy, but some unexpected true connections might be there too.

It must take dicipline to think, "okay that was fun, but it's over now". A guy could empty his bank account if he got too attached.

 

[Once you go black]

This is definately not a suggestion for OP. The exact opposite actually.

Some guys book SPs for short getaways or hotel stay-cations. Unless it goes terribly, a little closeness must develope. Eating meals together, sightseeing, entertainment, sex in a couple type setting. Mostly just fantasy, but some unexpected true connections might be there too.

It must take dicipline to think, "okay that was fun, but it's over now". A guy could empty his bank account if he got too attached.

Yup ,
There are so many guys desperate for any female affection they are making AI girlfriend apps ( more than one ) and loads of guys are using them .

They are so desperate, that they are ok w settling w false affection from an AI app as a substitute for real life females .
I feel bad for these guys .

Pretty much says it all .

 

[jjm86]

Yup ,
There are so many guys desperate for any female affection they are making AI girlfriend apps ( more than one ) and loads of guys are using them .

They are so desperate, that they are ok w settling w false affection from an AI app as a substitute for real life females .
I feel bad for these guys .

Pretty much says it all .

Is fake affection from an AI different than fake affection from a provider? Fake affection, care, from a provider is more sad. But its part of the silent social contract you sign when you see one

 

[Neelsmith1234]

Lot of valid advice here. I will add one more thing. Even if she reciprocates your feelings, would you be ok with your girl sleeping with several other men? That alone would be a reason to walk away before feelings get too strong.

 

[80watts]

Get a girlfriend who loves giving blowjobs and rimjobs....
Marry her....
Have kids with her...
You won't have time to think about her....

 

[Tsubame]

Lot of valid advice here. I will add one more thing. Even if she reciprocates your feelings, would you be ok with your girl sleeping with several other men? That alone would be a reason to walk away before feelings get too strong.

The jealousy would be too much for me.

 

[Rusty razor]

In this industry if you are paying for her time to be with her then you are a customer, period. That being said you can have favourites and be a regular and receive special treatment and totally enjoy each other, but you are still a customer.
If she sees you after hours, goes for dinner, movies, skiing, etc. whatever for free then that’s a different dynamic.
And you have to ask yourself if you can handle having a relationship with someone who fucks multiple guys per day because it’s a mind game that few can handle. I’ve had a couple of girlfriends in the industry, both did half service and they would talk about their day, one day you would think it was hot as fuck and wish you could have joined in and the next day made you feel like choking the life out of some asshole bad customer. Having a girlfriend in the industry is not for the weak of heart

 

[Larry's Torch]

(snip)
Talking is downright awkward even though there's a lot of trust and connection physically.

This says a lot. Can you maintain a relationship on this? Not likely.

(snip)
Your feelings will pass and this will pass cause you’re not really in a relationship.

It can be difficult because you're dealing with YOUR feelings and what you THINK she might be feeling.
Best to just step away. It might feel cruel etc., but you need to protect yourself emotionally and financially.
I'm speaking from personal experience of a broken heart and bank account. After the hormones clear out of your brain you see things as they realy are.

" The brain chemistry of infatuation is primarily driven by a surge of dopamine, norepinephrine, and phenylethylamine (PEA), alongside a significant drop in serotonin.

• Dopamine: Often called the "pleasure chemical," it activates the brain's reward circuit, creating feelings of euphoria, craving, and intense motivation similar to the effects of cocaine.
• Norepinephrine: Similar to adrenaline, this chemical triggers physical symptoms like a racing heart, sweaty palms, loss of appetite, and sleeplessness.
• Phenylethylamine (PEA): A natural stimulant that causes "butterflies" in the stomach and initiates the release of dopamine and norepinephrine.
• Serotonin: Levels decrease to those comparable to people with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), leading to obsessive, intrusive thoughts about the loved one.

AI-generated answer. Please verify critical facts. "

 

[Once you go black]

This says a lot. Can you maintain a relationship on this? Not likely.



It can be difficult because you're dealing with YOUR feelings and what you THINK she might be feeling.
Best to just step away. It might feel cruel etc., but you need to protect yourself emotionally and financially.
I'm speaking from personal experience of a broken heart and bank account. After the hormones clear out of your brain you see things as they realy are.

" The brain chemistry of infatuation is primarily driven by a surge of dopamine, norepinephrine, and phenylethylamine (PEA), alongside a significant drop in serotonin.

• Dopamine: Often called the "pleasure chemical," it activates the brain's reward circuit, creating feelings of euphoria, craving, and intense motivation similar to the effects of cocaine.
• Norepinephrine: Similar to adrenaline, this chemical triggers physical symptoms like a racing heart, sweaty palms, loss of appetite, and sleeplessness.
• Phenylethylamine (PEA): A natural stimulant that causes "butterflies" in the stomach and initiates the release of dopamine and norepinephrine.
• Serotonin: Levels decrease to those comparable to people with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), leading to obsessive, intrusive thoughts about the loved one.

AI-generated answer. Please verify critical facts. "

I would argue that serotonin levels increase when you’re around the person you are infatuated with and even more so when you’re being physically intimate. I’d agree w the rest .
I’ve personally only experienced infatuation w woman w whom the physical chemistry is off the charts ,

However that being said , that infatuation and all the love chemicals that came with it have lead me to ending up in a few otherwise less than ideal relationships .
When the chemicals dropped off w time and my head cleared I realized I’d been fooled by my own brain ( or lack of ) .
This has happened to me a few times .

 

[Dante22]

Lot of valid advice here. I will add one more thing. Even if she reciprocates your feelings, would you be ok with your girl sleeping with several other men? That alone would be a reason to walk away before feelings get too strong.

This man 🎯🎯🎯

 

[Larry's Torch]

(snip)
However that being said , that infatuation and all the love chemicals that came with it have lead me to ending up in a few otherwise less than ideal relationships .
When the chemicals dropped off w time and my head cleared I realized I’d been fooled by my own brain ( or lack of ) .
This has happened to me a few times .

Yep. Been there. Done that. Got the t-shirt and the hat.

 

[Bang4thebuck]

Go to a sexworker forum and read about how they talk about their clients. Most of them think we're losers who they can easily seduce for the $$$. A lonely, nice man is super easy prey. No different than the pretty girl who gets the nerd in highschool to do her homework for her. Hell, your money probably goes to her deadbeat boyfriend you never knew about. He probably treats her like garbage and drives around in a nice car paid for by dozens of men she's charmed along the way.

 

[sybian]

"Catching Feelings", imo, usually implies that you're envisioning a future with this person.... marry her.. have kids.. mortgage... yearly vacations to Disneyland....white picket fences,..dog and cat.

Now I'm guessing you yourself are a gentleman, since she's allowed you to see her every week. Otherwise, if you weren't, or even if she found you a little too clingy to a neurotic level, she'd probably start ghosting you for her own protection. But if this has been going on for a year, then that could only mean she's found a steady stream of reliable and 'safe' income that she can shorten her network. If she can rely on 10 other 'nice guys' to see her once a week at (ie) $500 an hour, including extras... then she doesn't need to spread herself too thin, finding other clients to top up her demanded income.

Reading the rest of your post, you're going off attractiveness, and I'll assume her 'skills' too... but I'm not hearing anything from a personal level, beyond just 'intimacy'. Not hearing how you two see each other outside those professional boundaries, or go above and beyond with her, or she with you... she's just looking good and giving your great sex.

How much do you know of her personally? Has she opened up to you completely in any small way? Told you a tragic story, farming for sympathy...?

From my own second-hand experience, as in my brother dabbled with the trade and fell into this trap with someone he saw frequently. She might be all 'sugar and spice' but once the 'transactional' becomes 'personal' there's a good chance you're going to get sucked down her spiralling life that she's kept hidden under her professionalism. One step, you're having the best sex of your life with a goddess tier provider; next step, you're in the middle of a street-beef with her 'ex-boyfriend-pimp' who's shaking you down for money she owed from a drug debt...

Now I'm not saying "Cinderella/Pretty-Woman" scenarios don't happen, they probably can... but those odds are better used buying lottery tickets.

You forgot alimony, and divorce lawyer fees in your list…

 

[Forum mod]

Ok, since some guys can't stay on topic and due to the fact this is a repetitive theme that's been covered many times before, it's closed.