Any tips for a first timer?
- Thread starter hossa81
- Start date
W
Warl0ck
Sure
- see a reputable SP. You'll find a few on this forum and they may contact you (stay away from Backpage, Leolist, etc). You can try those out when you get some street skills
- Advise the SP you're a virgin. This will prepare them for your nervousness & maybe put them in educational/first time mode
- As you posted already, manscape, brush teeth, shower (and scrub)
- Ask if you want to try something.
- Give her the envelope/money as soon as you walk in the door
- Don't show up early or late. Show up right on time. It's not an issue with every SP but some women don't want a guy "hanging around" attracting attention near their in-call
- say hello, thank you and treat her with respect.
- have fun.
- see a reputable SP. You'll find a few on this forum and they may contact you (stay away from Backpage, Leolist, etc). You can try those out when you get some street skills
- Advise the SP you're a virgin. This will prepare them for your nervousness & maybe put them in educational/first time mode
- As you posted already, manscape, brush teeth, shower (and scrub)
- Ask if you want to try something.
- Give her the envelope/money as soon as you walk in the door
- Don't show up early or late. Show up right on time. It's not an issue with every SP but some women don't want a guy "hanging around" attracting attention near their in-call
- say hello, thank you and treat her with respect.
- have fun.
A few ideas for you. I hope these are helpful and not too overwhelming 
Avoid saying her working name at the buzzer, or at the door as soon as you enter. It’s best to enter the suite quietly and wait until the door is closed before introducing yourself. It might not sound like a big deal, but discretion is really important and every little bit helps!
Try to avoid loudly saying things “perb” “escort” “300 dollars” “Ive read all your reviews!” “wow you look better than your website pictures!” while you’re near the door, or preferably even at all
Some girls like receiving flowers, some don’t (for discretion reasons). If you’re planning on bringing flowers, it’s best to check with her first.
Try to avoid very fragrant foods and spices for a few days leading up to the appointment. Obviously it’s a free world and you can eat all the onions you want, but since this is a VERY special occasion for you and you’re spending a lot of money, I’m sure you want to take every step possible to make it memorable
I’m pretty sure all ladies are open to outfit requests, but it’s best to do this several hours (or preferably days) beforehand so she can make sure she has the outfit hand washed, dried, and ready to go. Also, if a particular outfit from one of her pictures has caught your eye, it’s best to send her the URL link to the photos, rather than saying “I like picture 11 from your January 17th Leolist ad, and pictures 9 and 43 from your website gallery”. Since most ladies use their phones for bookings, it’s SOOOO much easier to tap a link or two than it is to scroll around on multiple websites, looking for dates and numbers. Again, not a big deal, but it’s the little things!
If you’re nervous about the appointment, wear cool and comfortable clothes. You might be surprised at how quickly you can get sweaty when you’re face to face with your escort for the first time. A thick sweater or a wool suit will make you uncomfortably hot, which will make you more nervous, ad infinitum. Another little tip is to chew gum on your way to the appointment, as nervousness can make your mouth really dry!
Wash your hands when you arrive (after dealing with donation). If there’s mouthwash put out for you, take advantage of it. Don’t forget to be tidy in her bathroom - rehang towels and wipe up water and spills. You’re a guest in her personal space, she will appreciate it.
SMILE! Nervousness can sometimes be interpreted as hostility or boredom. Let her know you’re a little nervous, laugh it off and have a good time! Maybe ask to start with a massage to relax a little
Most high-end companions won’t rush you out the door as soon as your 60 minutes are up, but make sure to be respectful of her time. If she’s getting up and putting clothes on, that’s your cue to get ready to leave. When the appointment is over and you’re both fully dressed, it’s NOT the time to pull out your cell phone and give her a 20-minute slideshow presentation of your vacation photos. Even if you had a great time together and made a wonderful connection, she might have things she needs to do (eating, using the bathroom, making her safety call etc etc etc)
Lastly - Powerpose before your appointment! Get your stress levels down and your confidence up. Maybe do some meditation beforehand, or give yourself a little pep talk. Have fun! Don’t get down on yourself if you feel your “performance” isn’t living up to your expectations. Relax and enjoy the moment. And don’t forget to SMILE
Avoid saying her working name at the buzzer, or at the door as soon as you enter. It’s best to enter the suite quietly and wait until the door is closed before introducing yourself. It might not sound like a big deal, but discretion is really important and every little bit helps!
Try to avoid loudly saying things “perb” “escort” “300 dollars” “Ive read all your reviews!” “wow you look better than your website pictures!” while you’re near the door, or preferably even at all
Some girls like receiving flowers, some don’t (for discretion reasons). If you’re planning on bringing flowers, it’s best to check with her first.
Try to avoid very fragrant foods and spices for a few days leading up to the appointment. Obviously it’s a free world and you can eat all the onions you want, but since this is a VERY special occasion for you and you’re spending a lot of money, I’m sure you want to take every step possible to make it memorable
I’m pretty sure all ladies are open to outfit requests, but it’s best to do this several hours (or preferably days) beforehand so she can make sure she has the outfit hand washed, dried, and ready to go. Also, if a particular outfit from one of her pictures has caught your eye, it’s best to send her the URL link to the photos, rather than saying “I like picture 11 from your January 17th Leolist ad, and pictures 9 and 43 from your website gallery”. Since most ladies use their phones for bookings, it’s SOOOO much easier to tap a link or two than it is to scroll around on multiple websites, looking for dates and numbers. Again, not a big deal, but it’s the little things!
If you’re nervous about the appointment, wear cool and comfortable clothes. You might be surprised at how quickly you can get sweaty when you’re face to face with your escort for the first time. A thick sweater or a wool suit will make you uncomfortably hot, which will make you more nervous, ad infinitum. Another little tip is to chew gum on your way to the appointment, as nervousness can make your mouth really dry!
Wash your hands when you arrive (after dealing with donation). If there’s mouthwash put out for you, take advantage of it. Don’t forget to be tidy in her bathroom - rehang towels and wipe up water and spills. You’re a guest in her personal space, she will appreciate it.
SMILE! Nervousness can sometimes be interpreted as hostility or boredom. Let her know you’re a little nervous, laugh it off and have a good time! Maybe ask to start with a massage to relax a little
Most high-end companions won’t rush you out the door as soon as your 60 minutes are up, but make sure to be respectful of her time. If she’s getting up and putting clothes on, that’s your cue to get ready to leave. When the appointment is over and you’re both fully dressed, it’s NOT the time to pull out your cell phone and give her a 20-minute slideshow presentation of your vacation photos. Even if you had a great time together and made a wonderful connection, she might have things she needs to do (eating, using the bathroom, making her safety call etc etc etc)
Lastly - Powerpose before your appointment! Get your stress levels down and your confidence up. Maybe do some meditation beforehand, or give yourself a little pep talk. Have fun! Don’t get down on yourself if you feel your “performance” isn’t living up to your expectations. Relax and enjoy the moment. And don’t forget to SMILE
Thank youA few ideas for you. I hope these are helpful and not too overwhelming
Avoid saying her working name at the buzzer, or at the door as soon as you enter. It’s best to enter the suite quietly and wait until the door is closed before introducing yourself. It might not sound like a big deal, but discretion is really important and every little bit helps!
Try to avoid loudly saying things “perb” “escort” “300 dollars” “Ive read all your reviews!” “wow you look better than your website pictures!” while you’re near the door, or preferably even at all
Some girls like receiving flowers, some don’t (for discretion reasons). If you’re planning on bringing flowers, it’s best to check with her first.
Try to avoid very fragrant foods and spices for a few days leading up to the appointment. Obviously it’s a free world and you can eat all the onions you want, but since this is a VERY special occasion for you and you’re spending a lot of money, I’m sure you want to take every step possible to make it memorable
I’m pretty sure all ladies are open to outfit requests, but it’s best to do this several hours (or preferably days) beforehand so she can make sure she has the outfit hand washed, dried, and ready to go. Also, if a particular outfit from one of her pictures has caught your eye, it’s best to send her the URL link to the photos, rather than saying “I like picture 11 from your January 17th Leolist ad, and pictures 9 and 43 from your website gallery”. Since most ladies use their phones for bookings, it’s SOOOO much easier to tap a link or two than it is to scroll around on multiple websites, looking for dates and numbers. Again, not a big deal, but it’s the little things!
If you’re nervous about the appointment, wear cool and comfortable clothes. You might be surprised at how quickly you can get sweaty when you’re face to face with your escort for the first time. A thick sweater or a wool suit will make you uncomfortably hot, which will make you more nervous, ad infinitum. Another little tip is to chew gum on your way to the appointment, as nervousness can make your mouth really dry!
Wash your hands when you arrive (after dealing with donation). If there’s mouthwash put out for you, take advantage of it. Don’t forget to be tidy in her bathroom - rehang towels and wipe up water and spills. You’re a guest in her personal space, she will appreciate it.
SMILE! Nervousness can sometimes be interpreted as hostility or boredom. Let her know you’re a little nervous, laugh it off and have a good time! Maybe ask to start with a massage to relax a little
Most high-end companions won’t rush you out the door as soon as your 60 minutes are up, but make sure to be respectful of her time. If she’s getting up and putting clothes on, that’s your cue to get ready to leave. When the appointment is over and you’re both fully dressed, it’s NOT the time to pull out your cell phone and give her a 20-minute slideshow presentation of your vacation photos. Even if you had a great time together and made a wonderful connection, she might have things she needs to do (eating, using the bathroom, making her safety call etc etc etc)
Lastly - Powerpose before your appointment! Get your stress levels down and your confidence up. Maybe do some meditation beforehand, or give yourself a little pep talk. Have fun! Don’t get down on yourself if you feel your “performance” isn’t living up to your expectations. Relax and enjoy the moment. And don’t forget to SMILE
Not necessarily. If someone is extremely used to the feeling of their hand, and is a chronic hard masturbator, and have death grip, they feeling of a woman can be extremely different. Add on the anxiety, I'd say you may not even finish altogether.
I'd suggest not cheaping out and booking a longer session, at least 90 minutes, so you two can both take the time to be patient about what you're doing.
Pick a more experienced provider rather than someone brand new. If a lady says she doesn't see first timers, cross her off your list & pick someone with a reputation for being good with first timers!
If you are like me, I had extreme death grip for my first time and barely finished. Just remember that its fine if you finish too fast, or not at all. Providers are professional and are not there to judge you, its just about having a good time.
Be sure to shave down there not the day of, but the day before. Be very formal if you're calling or texting, say your name, ask the menu, how long you want, and what day and time to see if it is available. Use full sentences and always be polite via phone and in person.
What I like to do is super scrub myself before I leave my place, and then quick rinse when I get there. The second rinse is for her peace of mind, even though I'm super clean. Also let her knows its your first time, and that you would like her to take the lead. I'd book 90 min to 2 hours for your first time, or an hour. Dont do half hour for first time, it flies quickly.
Be sure to shave down there not the day of, but the day before. Be very formal if you're calling or texting, say your name, ask the menu, how long you want, and what day and time to see if it is available. Use full sentences and always be polite via phone and in person.
What I like to do is super scrub myself before I leave my place, and then quick rinse when I get there. The second rinse is for her peace of mind, even though I'm super clean. Also let her knows its your first time, and that you would like her to take the lead. I'd book 90 min to 2 hours for your first time, or an hour. Dont do half hour for first time, it flies quickly.
W
Warl0ck
I think if you're a guy whose mid 20's and up and still a virgin losing your virginity to an SP just makes sense. You'll obviously be nervous the first time with an SP, but that's easier to deal with than being nervous with the first woman you fuck. An SP is not likely to point out you're not a great lover or that you have a small dick whereas a civilian woman, bitter at the lousy performance, just might. To a guy whose already insecure about meeting women that's absolute destruction. I think for the right SP it's also got to be a lot of fun showing a rookie his way around the female body. I can see this becoming more of a thing down the road too with so many of us only having digital friendships and losing the skill to actually interact with real humans on a personal basis.
Not to hijack your thread, you have been with PERB for a year and a half (since Aug 2015). You still haven't seen any sp yet, based on what you are claiming. I am not questioning you but I must say you sure have been doing lots of research.
Seems like you really like to kick tires. Good for you. As for tips, you got plenty of them already.
The biggest tip would be go to an experienced lady and just tell her that. Keep it discrete on the phone and texts and have an impeccable hygiene.
Another advice would be; do not bargain and push for services she doesn't offer. (A secret tip.... things do get better with repeats, trust me. Many veteran ladies keep adding more each visit ).
Be respectful, be VERY respectful.
Good Luck
Seems like you really like to kick tires. Good for you. As for tips, you got plenty of them already.
The biggest tip would be go to an experienced lady and just tell her that. Keep it discrete on the phone and texts and have an impeccable hygiene.
Another advice would be; do not bargain and push for services she doesn't offer. (A secret tip.... things do get better with repeats, trust me. Many veteran ladies keep adding more each visit
). Be respectful, be VERY respectful.
Good Luck
Just for a completely different take on things...
Don't do it.
It's an easy hobby to get addicted to and can be very expensive. I've been in this hobby for many years and have spent thousands and thousands of dollars. Yes I've gotten a chance to have sex with some amazing women, women that I probably wouldn't have had a chance with without paying for it but when I think back I do have some regrets.
I know it sounds hypocritical to say that on this type of board but if I had a chance to talk to someone before entering this hobby maybe things would be different. And I consider myself a lucky guy. So far the only thing that has been damaged has been my bank account. I've been tested many times and thankfully have never picked up any diseases. I almost picked someone off the street but someone else beat me to her and they ended up getting caught in a police sting. I've been robbed and cheated but that kind of goes with the territory if you do it long enough and think with the small head instead of the big one.
Having said all that if you are still going to go through with this the best advice I could give is, set a budget and don't go over budget. Be respectful of the lady, be clean and don't assume things. And be mindful of the community and get tested every now and then. There's threads on this board about anonymous testing.
Good luck to you.
Don't do it.
It's an easy hobby to get addicted to and can be very expensive. I've been in this hobby for many years and have spent thousands and thousands of dollars. Yes I've gotten a chance to have sex with some amazing women, women that I probably wouldn't have had a chance with without paying for it but when I think back I do have some regrets.
I know it sounds hypocritical to say that on this type of board but if I had a chance to talk to someone before entering this hobby maybe things would be different. And I consider myself a lucky guy. So far the only thing that has been damaged has been my bank account. I've been tested many times and thankfully have never picked up any diseases. I almost picked someone off the street but someone else beat me to her and they ended up getting caught in a police sting. I've been robbed and cheated but that kind of goes with the territory if you do it long enough and think with the small head instead of the big one.
Having said all that if you are still going to go through with this the best advice I could give is, set a budget and don't go over budget. Be respectful of the lady, be clean and don't assume things. And be mindful of the community and get tested every now and then. There's threads on this board about anonymous testing.
Good luck to you.
Don't be cheap and try to find a bargain price.
Spend the money to get top of the quality and read her reviews.
Those 150 hour gals should not even be on your radar.
Most pros have a shower so go use it before you hit the sheets.
Let her know you are inexperienced and ask her to take the lead but gently.
Do not go see a gal who does domination.
There is time to try that later but not your first time.
You asked about bringing condoms.
She will supply them but sure if you want to go buy some just in case, although 99.99% of the time she will have plenty.
Don't be embarrassed about lasting 1 or 2 minutes as you likely won't last long.
After you recharge go for another round or two so make sure she offers multiple shots.
Be polite.
Don't ask overly personal things, keep it to pleasant chit chat.
My last words are don't try to get all fancy.
Keep it simple and basic like Mish and cowgirl, or possibly doggie for round two.
Forget every porn you have ever watched and any silly thoughts of trying to stand her on her head or any such moves.
Spend the money to get top of the quality and read her reviews.
Those 150 hour gals should not even be on your radar.
Most pros have a shower so go use it before you hit the sheets.
Let her know you are inexperienced and ask her to take the lead but gently.
Do not go see a gal who does domination.
There is time to try that later but not your first time.
You asked about bringing condoms.
She will supply them but sure if you want to go buy some just in case, although 99.99% of the time she will have plenty.
Don't be embarrassed about lasting 1 or 2 minutes as you likely won't last long.
After you recharge go for another round or two so make sure she offers multiple shots.
Be polite.
Don't ask overly personal things, keep it to pleasant chit chat.
My last words are don't try to get all fancy.
Keep it simple and basic like Mish and cowgirl, or possibly doggie for round two.
Forget every porn you have ever watched and any silly thoughts of trying to stand her on her head or any such moves.
Another word of advice is that if you're a virgin, please be aware that you may not be able to keep your feelings in check. Note that these ladies are professionals, and outside of the money exchange for a service, most likely do not feel for you, not even as a friend. Be prepared to feel attached, and know how to cut off those feelings almost immediately. There are providers that make me feel like I am in love when I am there, its not necessarily a good thing, and I avoid seeing them later.
Also, it depends on how you are to begin with, but if you've spent years putting the ladies/pussy on a pedestal, be prepared to feel quite a bit of guilt even if you've repeatedly told yourself not to.
Also, it depends on how you are to begin with, but if you've spent years putting the ladies/pussy on a pedestal, be prepared to feel quite a bit of guilt even if you've repeatedly told yourself not to.
W
Warl0ck
Not necessarily. I had a friend who was a virgin. He could date but wasn't able to make the move to having sex, so he saw a reputable SP. He was nervous as hell going in but then went through a very quick transformation and was a changed guy. He suddenly had game around females & was on the path to sex with a civilian. I admit, I was astounded how quick it happened too.
This hobby is only damaging and expensive if you let it be. It's the sexual equivalent of having social media friends. As long as you can differentiate between a FB "friend" and a real life friend, you'll be fine. Same for paid sex versus casual sex/intimacy. When you start getting lost in the fantasy and believe it's real that's when you have a problem. That's usually a symptom of a deeper issue too. It's like understanding that Bryan Cranston, the actor, is NOT Heisenberg, he just played that part in a TV show. But, in a world that's so impersonal it's not hard to see why guys get swept away. The ironic part is visiting an SP is part of the problem, not the solution, when it comes to loneliness & isolation.
Paid sex is like gambling. As long as you aren't spending your kids diaper money, you're good. If you can't make your obligations then you have a problem. And having the been on the SO side of working women in this industry for nearly a decade I know that sex addiction is a real thing.
just a thought,
but just don't ask advice, its all common sense pretty much,
and if it doesn't come to you at some point, I mean manners and respect, it never will
and if the lady is any good and decent, she will take care of you,
see the most respected lady you can find. and she will show you the way.
these ladies can size you up in a heart beat they don't have to be told anything,
I think that is the key find the most respected ladies you can no drama at all every associated with them. and they will show you the way,
once your feet are wet, branch out and experience different things different ladies.
and like someone said maybe you shouldn't.
sex is no big deal sexuality is nothing really,
but at times in your life, its the only thing that matters.
funny how it works.
but guys have spent decades in this hobby and countless thousands of dollars, for what.
is this really what you want.
im not saying its wrong.
but listen to the men on this board. read between the lines. a lot of men are very lonely and angry.
not everyone.
its hard and you can get addicted real fast.
make sure you have a life first.
I would say that again, its the most important thing,
make sure you have a life first before you enter into this. you can get swept away and lost very fast.
don't look for a life or a friend in this hobby,
though some of us have found good friends here, it kind of just happened to me any way.
I think that is the fucking hard part in this hobby, not something as silly as brushing your teeth. if you have to be told that your fucked,
take it for fun, have friends and family and hobbies and a full life, before you even start down this road.
my 2 cents.
and
don't spend your future on this hobby, make sure your financial future is well on its way, before, like a secure job and investments, etc penions etc etc.
there was some old guy trying to borrow money on here once if I remember, spent a fortune on sp's now he is old and broke.
don't be some pathetic old guy, broke and spent everything on sp's
have a life have fun. make sure you have that taken care of first.
but just don't ask advice, its all common sense pretty much,
and if it doesn't come to you at some point, I mean manners and respect, it never will
and if the lady is any good and decent, she will take care of you,
see the most respected lady you can find. and she will show you the way.
these ladies can size you up in a heart beat they don't have to be told anything,
I think that is the key find the most respected ladies you can no drama at all every associated with them. and they will show you the way,
once your feet are wet, branch out and experience different things different ladies.
and like someone said maybe you shouldn't.
sex is no big deal sexuality is nothing really,
but at times in your life, its the only thing that matters.
funny how it works.
but guys have spent decades in this hobby and countless thousands of dollars, for what.
is this really what you want.
im not saying its wrong.
but listen to the men on this board. read between the lines. a lot of men are very lonely and angry.
not everyone.
its hard and you can get addicted real fast.
make sure you have a life first.
I would say that again, its the most important thing,
make sure you have a life first before you enter into this. you can get swept away and lost very fast.
don't look for a life or a friend in this hobby,
though some of us have found good friends here, it kind of just happened to me any way.
I think that is the fucking hard part in this hobby, not something as silly as brushing your teeth. if you have to be told that your fucked,
take it for fun, have friends and family and hobbies and a full life, before you even start down this road.
my 2 cents.
and
don't spend your future on this hobby, make sure your financial future is well on its way, before, like a secure job and investments, etc penions etc etc.
there was some old guy trying to borrow money on here once if I remember, spent a fortune on sp's now he is old and broke.
don't be some pathetic old guy, broke and spent everything on sp's
have a life have fun. make sure you have that taken care of first.
This is probably the correct answer for over 3/4 of the guys asking this question on these boards, but I don't know OP so it's hard to tell if he's in the 3/4 or the 1/4.
If you're going to go through with it, all the tips so far are good and standard.
