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- I don't need a sex swing, I have a personality. (boom, bedshot!) - I don't even own perfume, let alone glitter. You won't be surprised to learn that I've been using men's deodorant and shave 'ems for ages. - I've had some pretty heartbreakingly good orgasms... thanks friends. - If I...

... damnit. shoot me an email with pics, I could probably be swayed. But don't tell anyone else. elsidawson@gmail.com

I used to have PBR as my go-to duff, but now it's reserved for anniversaries (my buddy isn't here to crush a case anymore, so we pour one out). I have one Penny right now, she's my fifth or sixth rabbit. I lost count. She's okay, I guess... $15 if you want her and her cage. Obviously 500...

Depends on my mood, really. They're different sessions but they're both great. Maybe alternating through the week and then one of each on Sunday? That's my vote.

Ooooooooh, I like this one. Top five games, no particular order: -Borderlands (1, 2, 3, but not so much the Pre-Sequel) -Halo (usually replay the third one, nostalgic game for me) -COD: Modern Warfare 2 -Spore (I've lost days playing this dumbass game, and it never stops me from doing it...

Call spoofing. Yucky, yucky game that one is. Yes, people trying to scam people don't garner much sympathy from me.

Okay, fine. Maybe I'm not new at this. Maybe I know exactly what I'm doing. Muahahahah

You're head of relations from now on, JD. Bang on.. Collect one blowie.

I read a great thing the other day a standup comedian did, something something "if you put me in a room with crack in it, I wouldn't have a problem because I'm not into crack. A room full of cocks scares men who are worried they'd do it if they were left alone." What were you saying about...

But not MitM attacks or Trojans or "this fun app will keep you happy on your commute" but you gave it access to your messages and gallery. But if Signal gets hacked, that should be fine...

My first job was as a telemarketer. I was 14 and heading downtown in winter after swim class and reading the scripts, "can we count on you for your support with BC Deaf Kids" or whatever. Had a guy who thought that he would ask about me, where I'm calling from, "Oh, Vancouver? Do the...

Then you shouldn't have anything to worry about.

Ahhh, misunderstanding here--sex work isn't anonymous, it's confidential. If you think that there's a risk that I'm going to out you or leave my phone unlocked somewhere for anyone to find, then maybe we aren't a good fit. It's more likely that you're a client who's left your location services...

According to canon, my full name is Elsi McGriddles Dawson.

Pay them to? Pay them to.

The last time you were here, you proposed to me. So, yeah. Probably best we keep it long distance. You'll always be my first, T8E.

I always prefer the plug n' play models, there's nothing worse than having a vibe die before you nut. I've had four Hitachis, and my favourite one has a death rattle but whenever I try to move onto the other ones, I miss the jerking... Ol' Faithful.

Before I retire, I want a workshop but I'd also settle for some place to build one and a plug to run the extension cord to. Oh, and I wanna see Maya Odelle in action. That babe knows how to ruin a life and I like that in a person.

The man said it, and since I have a badge, I'ma sing praises and say it louder. Be a big boy. Make good choices. Don't ask sex workers to use a bespoke app to talk to you because you think you're extra special and require separate security protocols. You're on a forum that went live just...

GFE sessions $250h incall, $300h outcall The standard issue session. If you're new to the scene or you're just looking for a bit of full-service company, come share a drink and have some attention paid to you. PSE sessions $300h+ For when you want something a little more 'I wish my wife...