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Bad BDSM Pun Competition

dan1

New member
Jun 13, 2009
30
1
0
I suspect there are some pretty clever people on this website - so I am proposing a Bad BDSM Pun Competition. No prizes can be anticipated.

Here is my first attempt


When the Sub's urethra was touched, was there a sound?


I look forward to reading your entries

cheers

dan1
 

uncleg

Well-known member
Jul 25, 2006
5,652
839
113
Q: Why do men like women in leather ?

A: They smell like a new car.
 

bobo69z

New member
Sep 22, 2006
111
0
0
67
Not really a pun but...

Did you hear about the cross-eyed foot fetishist?

They kept getting off on the wrong foot....
 

uncleg

Well-known member
Jul 25, 2006
5,652
839
113
Women are always whining about how we're suffocating them. Personally, I think if you can still hear them whining you're not pressing hard enough onthe pilllow.
 

HB40

Condom User
Jul 30, 2008
3,068
41
0
To the right
Boy, those are some bad puns! :rolleyes:

I always request a ball gag now, I once innocently made a comment of that sounds nice.....and she stuck a metal rod into my penis! :eek:
 

PuntMeister

Punt-on!
Jul 13, 2003
2,292
1,486
113
Oh my!

An old GF of mine used to love to bake. One day she was making bread sticks and she had rolled out the sticks onto a cookie sheet before popping them in the oven. She had all the spices on the counter and was shaking a different spice onto each bread stick for some surprise tastes. I said "have you tried parsley?" 'yup, boring'. "have you tried oregano?" 'uh-huh'. "basil? savory?" 'yes and yes'. "how about dill?". 'WHAT ARE CRAZY' she said with a smirk. Taken aback, I said "what's wrong with dill?" 'only that I would shove it up your ass! Bastard wants me to make dill-dough for him"!

:D:eek::D
 

sub882

New member
Sep 29, 2008
96
1
0
Groan

I know a guy who is always coming up with really bad puns.

He is a real pain in the ass!
 

dan1

New member
Jun 13, 2009
30
1
0
The winner is Puntmeister !

Well,

First, thanks to all of you who contributed. Puntmeister, I like the dill-dough one the best. Hopefully you will get your reward somewhere.

Incidentally, I don't know if you heard about the machinist who was into CBT. His boss found him using the metal lathe on the weekend. He was making a heavy metal sphere. When asked what he was doing he replied I'm making a ball bearing

cheers (and my apologies)

dan
 

PuntMeister

Punt-on!
Jul 13, 2003
2,292
1,486
113
Well,

First, thanks to all of you who contributed. Puntmeister, I like the dill-dough one the best. Hopefully you will get your reward somewhere.

Incidentally, I don't know if you heard about the machinist who was into CBT. His boss found him using the metal lathe on the weekend. He was making a heavy metal sphere. When asked what he was doing he replied I'm making a ball bearing

cheers (and my apologies)

dan
Woooo Hoooo! I won I won I won! Victory is mine!

...and for my prize, a free session with a domme of their choice. er, ah, I considered saying a domme of my choice, but that would be presumptuous and un-sub-like. Hmmm, waiting for the prized PM....

I will bring the dill.

-Punt.
 

sub882

New member
Sep 29, 2008
96
1
0
Woooo Hoooo! I won I won I won! Victory is mine!

...and for my prize, a free session with a domme of their choice. er, ah, I considered saying a domme of my choice, but that would be presumptuous and un-sub-like. Hmmm, waiting for the prized PM....

I will bring the dill.

-Punt.
Hey... can I choose?
 

edmontonsubbie

Edmontonsubbie
Apr 22, 2006
1,307
19
38
114
uh...Edmonton.
No prizes can be anticipated.

cheers

dan1
I cannot believe this has gone on this long.....while I don't wish to be a stickler....the rules are and were clear. Spoken like the "soup Nazi".....No Prize for You!

nice to see ya punt....

cheers,

eddie.
 

dan1

New member
Jun 13, 2009
30
1
0
let's get together to put Punt though the goal post!

Hello Eddie

You are right. The rules were clear. I said there would be no prize. However if we are trying to make a community here perhaps we need reconsider that rule....

One of the key aspects of any community is how much social capital it has (you might like to read Bowling Alone). Social capital can be loosely defined as a willingness of community members to help each other out for the benefit of the individual and for the benefit of the community at large. We have all seen this sense of community being exhibited recently with the long discussion that occured with Shy Courage. Eddie, you, yourself, noted that the thread became much more to us as it continued.

So, in the spirit of creating a community, and to help our friend PuntMeister out, I have decided that I am willing to contribute $20.00 towards purchasing a prize. If there are a few (10-15) other like minded souls we can probably raise enough so that the Punt (lovely dimunitive) can get an hour with a magnificent Domme.

So Punt, if this works for you, post us all a note, letting us know who you would like to go to. (Judging from the posts I have read here, you could not go wrong with any the Dommes who help sponsor this forum). As far as payment, make sure it is someone who has PayPal and that SHE is okay with this arrangement.

To all of you out there who believe in the BDSM community, here is another opportunity to make our community and social connections stronger. Please make a contribution to put Punt Through the Goal Posts!

Cheers

dan
 
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edmontonsubbie

Edmontonsubbie
Apr 22, 2006
1,307
19
38
114
uh...Edmonton.
omg...too funny...

....this post has made my day. And, I, for one am more than willing to donate my $20 toward this most worthy cause. I don't have paypal but I have mastercard....or I can just mail the damn bill directly to wherever....for that amount of money, that's likely the easiest.

My only caveat....and, of course, at this point it can only be a suggestion as any caveat will need 50% + 1 for support....would be that the punt select a Domme that he has NOT seen in the past....further....we are able to suggest "things" that should happen during his session....lol!!!!....too much fun. Now I must go to work but I will do so with a rather large smile.

kindest,

eddie.
 

HB40

Condom User
Jul 30, 2008
3,068
41
0
To the right
Please make a contribution to put Punt Through the Goal Posts!
I would be happy to make a contribution in the honour of team spirit. He already made the touchdown with the best pun, he should get the opportunity for the point after. :)
 
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