Do you feel a difference in quality between paid sex, hook ups, and relationships?

[Chessmen]

can you feel the difference in quality and intimacy when it comes to paid sex, random one night stands, friends with benefits and long term relationships?

 

[jgg]

can you feel the difference in quality and intimacy when it comes to paid sex, random one night stands, friends with benefits and long term relationships?

Yes, all at the same time.

 

[KinkyKatey]

I like this question. I have never had a a one night stand as it's not my thing, I lost my V card to a friends with benefits situation to a wonderful man I met on a fetish site (that is the only fwb situation I had) and I have had two long term relationships (outside of the hobby). I think at the end of the day the difference in quality and intimacy boils down to chemistry regardless of the "relationship". For example one of my long term relationships was a bit of a joke most of the time there was no real quality or intimacy, a lot of the time it felt forced, going through the motions of being in a "serious relationship". The other one however was great, every time we were "together" felt energized, passionate, carnal and liberating. I have been with men in the hobby that didn't like kissing, talking, cuddling or the lights on... safe to say I could have been any ransom lady and it wouldn't have made a difference, then there are the gents that made me feel as if I could fly, the ones that text me later and with just a message I am tingling in anticipation. Then of course the fwb, maybe bias as he was my first, but every time was new and exciting even the things we had already done, every touch electric and every smile or eye twinkle exhilarating! So do I feel a difference in quality and intimacy basised on the circumstances of our meeting, no I do not, I notice a difference on whether we have chemistry and whether we were simply just meant to be "entangled". I look forward to reading other thoughts on the matter

Xo
Katey

 

[ExpCharlee]

I mean, I have guys tell me all the time I can do things that non-professionals can't. So, I assume that people pay for a higher quality experience and that's one of the reasons why this business exists.

 

[LalaniElectrica]

I personally prefer seeing clients, as much as I put into getting ready, shower, waxing, hair lashes, nails and smelling fresh, dressing hot, the gents usually put in a good effort to be clean and sweet smelling, they are usually sober and on their best behaviour and willing to be more adventurous, and interested in pleasing the woman as much as they enjoy being pleased. They have a goal, a purpose and it's not to try and get married and have kids, lol... So it's more fun and less complicated!

The difference between that and a one night stand is night and day. I'm not usually much of a one night stand person, especially drunken one night stands, not my thing, I do not like drunken sex for the most part, or people if a person is drunk they are less aware of themselves and their partner... I would make an exception if it was a vacation and I was with a girlfriend, I love exhibitionist activities, that's very rare but when it does happen, it's very hot!

Having a partner has it's merits and it's downfalls. Let's just say I've been there, done that, either in marriage or boyfriend, it never ends up working out for me, I end up putting in way to much and get hurt, so I think I'm done with anything really, really serious, I'm way too positive to let another person get me down. It's not fun anymore to have that kind of co-dependency, not that all relationships are like that, but mine seem to be the constant checking in and other weirdness associated now with being a mistress, it's not worth it for me in the long run.

Trust is a huge thing, and I only trust the people who see me, and/or my personal friends, that is my final outcome from the accumulation of all the information and my own life experiences.

 

[masterblaster]

I have a good friend that is an SP. Have had a few instances lately when I have gone to see her for a social evening and we end up in bed together. It is much more intimate and satisfying than a paid date with her. She is much more passionate and expresses how good it feels to her when we end in bed unplanned.

 

[onslaught13]

big difference if having a hookup anything goes. Paid sex is limited and relationships.. well you gotta do a ton of work!

 

[2bfair]

I like this question. I have never had a a one night stand as it's not my thing, I lost my V card to a friends with benefits situation to a wonderful man I met on a fetish site (that is the only fwb situation I had) and I have had two long term relationships (outside of the hobby). I think at the end of the day the difference in quality and intimacy boils down to chemistry regardless of the "relationship". For example one of my long term relationships was a bit of a joke most of the time there was no real quality or intimacy, a lot of the time it felt forced, going through the motions of being in a "serious relationship". The other one however was great, every time we were "together" felt energized, passionate, carnal and liberating. I have been with men in the hobby that didn't like kissing, talking, cuddling or the lights on... safe to say I could have been any ransom lady and it wouldn't have made a difference, then there are the gents that made me feel as if I could fly, the ones that text me later and with just a message I am tingling in anticipation. Then of course the fwb, maybe bias as he was my first, but every time was new and exciting even the things we had already done, every touch electric and every smile or eye twinkle exhilarating! So do I feel a difference in quality and intimacy basised on the circumstances of our meeting, no I do not, I notice a difference on whether we have chemistry and whether we were simply just meant to be "entangled". I look forward to reading other thoughts on the matter

Xo
Katey

Wow. Well put! My experience is about the same as yours. It is the chemistry that makes the difference for me too. I too have gone through the motions of a relationship and even seeing an sp or casual hook up/ one night stand only to feel , ah that was okay. . With most sp's there isnt a chemistry but there have been a few that the intimacy energy seems more intense, energizing, almost like we were lovers who were torn apart and just found each other again. that is awesome.
The intimacy of a few sp's have made me feel like i am 23yrs old, tingling like a puppy, rather than feeling like I am an older gentleman with a younger gal.
I could not feel that way with a gal my own age. I enjoy a woman my age if the energy is good but when a gal way younger than me sees me with a gfe , that is the fountain of youth for me.
ps. I am glad that gfe does not include me having to account for my time away from my gf/partner/. That drove me nuts and I never cheated when in a relationship but always got questioned.

Bottom line.. Best sex and best energy connections has been with sp's. But i have no regrets as I do have two wonderful children from my x.

 

[nightswhisper]

Sex in a relationship is always always better.

I am very communicative with my partners about what I like and what I don't like. Opening up in the bedroom opens up a lot more in the relationship. I am particularly selective about my partner anyway.

I seldom see SPs unless I go more than a few months without a girl or girlfriend. I've always been disappointed with SP experiences compared to a romantic partner.

 

[Elmore]

Sex in a relationship is always always better.

I am very communicative with my partners about what I like and what I don't like. Opening up in the bedroom opens up a lot more in the relationship. I am particularly selective about my partner anyway.

I seldom see SPs unless I go more than a few months without a girl or girlfriend. I've always been disappointed with SP experiences compared to a romantic partner.

Agree completely.

I also find the notion that sex workers are more skilled to be false. Maybe better actresses and have a much higher tolerance for the crsp they deal with but actual sexual prowess-not so much.

 

[duneek]

I can't say that I've been with a SP who cracked my top 5 sexual partners.

I've found that when the sex is based on an authentic mutual attraction, as opposed to a business transaction, the effort from both parties is much greater and not just to please each other but ourselves.

Plus there's no time restriction, which of course makes for better segues into future rounds where you get to learn more about each other's likes and limitations.

 

[ExpCharlee]

I can't say that I've been with a SP who cracked my top 5 sexual partners.

challenge accepted

 

[duneek]

challenge accepted

Clementine throwing down the gauntlet, lol. Okay then.

 

[johnnydepth]

Can't say I really notice a difference, but I'm always a little happier when I get paid.

 

[jgg]

Can't say I really notice a difference, but I'm always a little happier when I get paid.

Paid or laid?

 

[lukom]

There is an obvious difference, I don't know if we can substantiate the differences with the word "quality". I've been in great relationships, but also shitty ones. I've had great sessions, and also some shitty sessions. I gave up on hookups when I entered this hobby. I like the no strings attached aspect behind it. I don't have to wine and dine a girl (unless she's an SP I've seen enough times and like my sessions with her enough to take her out). Similarly I'm not stuck letting a girl I hooked up with spend the night with me at my place, nor do I have to go spend the night at her place. With an SP I pay my donation for the hours or two, we enjoy our time together, and then part ways when the time comes. No strings attached, no issues.

 

[UhOh]

There's no comparison between a relationship where you chill with a girl all evening followed by hours of sex at night versus paying a girl you don't know to start the one hour countdown. Sex with SP's scratches and itch but nothing special about handing over cash for sex.

 

[Big_Guy_Rye]

Long term Relationships are probably the best balance of quality and intimacy, because you know you're investing yourself for the long haul and into marriage. If you truly love each other, then the sex can be wonderful, making love to more than just the body but the soul as well. But it's not without it's downfalls, because as the relationship goes on, the desire, the energy, the 'spice', dwindles to the point it just become routine, and even though you still love each other, the act itself feels emotionless, but at least there is still some catharsis.

So then you look to paid sex, to get the girl to do things your wife will no longer do for you. And with the right SP, she'll make you feel 20 years younger and fucking like it too. But depending on the type of sex with a type of girl, and how much you pay..... there are varying degrees, where intimacy doesn't matter, you just want the quality.

Opinions about "friends with benefits" differs due to personal experience for me. As a teenagers, it was a lot of fun trying to figure out what sex was all about. As young adults in college, there were friends who just wanted 'one night stands' to relieve the stress from studying all the time. As older adults, it's still fun,,.... but unlike a friend of mine, it becomes a trap......

 

[PierreCoeur]

If we are talking the quality of a sexual experience how does one compare in generalities? A relationship is so much different as it is over a period of time. It ebs and flows. Paying for sex is a singular act to fulfil an urgent need or a desire. Sometimes it is awesome and sometimes it really sucks. Especially if the provider rushes you through the act to get you out the door. In those instances you realize you are paying to get your rocks off and all the girl cares about is the money.

You are just one John on a fucking assembly line in a pussy factory. Then there are others you pay that are total opposite. One SP, I handed her the cash for a one hour session and we ended up talking for 2 hours. I finally realized it was way past midnite and I had to get up at 5 am. I was happy to leave without the sex, but she insisted I stay. We went at it for a half hour and it was fabulous. But I did not expect it.

While I have no experience with a real hookup, one of my hottest experiences was a bit of a hookup with a stripper in a VIP booth. After a series of four lap dances she asked if I wanted to have sex. I told her I didn't have the money and she said she didn't care. She had broken up with a boyfriend a month early and hadn't fucked anyone in that time.

It was one of the best sexual experiences I ever had because it wasn't expected and it was in a club. Plus she was the hottest girl at the club and she was horny for me.

So I guess what I am saying is sex when you aren't expecting it might be the best from my perspective.

 

[UhOh]

Sex with a SP is sex with a condom. Sex in a relationship is without a condom and that's a far better experience you'll never have or want to have with a SP.