*~* would you date an sp? *~*

[Cami Parker]

Agreed! Honesty is ALWAYS te very best policy and I rarely have sympathy for those who are burned by their own lack if honesty.... If someone truly loves you they will accept every part of you, and if they don't I think you're better off without them in your life....

Tough subject for me since I've never under any circumstances fucked around while in a relationship or knowingly fucked around with someone else while they are in a relationship. I don't know whether it's a personal integrity thing or what but being that way certainly would throw a wrench into things as far as this scenario goes.

Obviously there are a lot of people who do fuck around on the side, they make their decisions and justify it to themselves so it's not for me to be judgmental, but if they get caught and it ruins their lives, they're certainly not going to get any sympathy on my part.

 

[Cami Parker]

Ya, you must be honest from the very beginning... There is no amount of "getting to know your sparkling personality" that would make someone reconsider their stance on such a controversial topic. And like you said, even if they would have been ok with it, once you've been hiding it for a month or so, the fact that you're an sp is almost a non-issue, because you're now a liar....
But that's just me, of course!

At first I went, this doesn't makes sense.
Then re-read and went oh, so as a possible S.O to the SP, the S.O will always be fearful that she might accept the incredibly handsome or $$$$ offer for bbfs? Then her profile/name will be slandered on thedirty, thereby embarrassing the SP and the S.O?

So the only way the relationship can work is if the pooner quits pooning and the SP quits escorting.

I don't think the SP can quit in a dime, it's her job/career. Whereas the pooning is a hobby.

Here's my take,
Either tell him that you're an SP on the first/second date, before things become more. After that, your chance is gone. It'd be too far to go back and say you're an SP, when you realize you're in love. etc etc.

 

[Cami Parker]

You think? I'm always my 100% authentic self, regardless of present company or circumstance

Because she's the big fake SP version of her when you meet her and she will never be that version again when you start dating the real her with all the normal girlfriend problems. What attracted you to her the first time, other than the looks, will never be there again when you date her.

 

[Cami Parker]

For e in my relationships, I equate monogamy with honesty and nothing to do with the physical act of sex. I don't care if I'm the hottest thing on 2 legs, the best sex ever, the nicest person... Bla bla bla.... Men are not genetically wired for monogamy, and it's not always fair to expect it.... Their raging testosterone compels them to spread the seed lol
It's all biology baby!

My question is this:

Is monogamy really possible in this highly-sexed society? Very few men seem to think so (based on responses in other threads), even though many women claim that's what they want in their SO relationship.

 

[Cami Parker]

That's totally understandable... It's hard to be judged by your choice of romantic partner, and some people outside of our bubble can be less than open minded.... Wouldn't want to get shunned by the fam for your open-mindedness....

I would date an SP, it would not be a problem for me all personally... but having family and friends know would be problematic. But casual dating would be fine.

 

[Cami Parker]

I think it's possible, but we all have to agree it goes against the make human nature... Again, biology... Just as women are wired to nurture, men are wired to procreate.... Of course it's "do-able" but I'm not sure it's totally natural...

Thank you for your insight. Although I asked the question of AA_train, in reference to his post, of course I don't think that his initial comments nor his reply to my query would be the quantitative reply for the entire male species. Perhaps, rather than dabbling in the obvious, you would care to venture your own thoughts and opinion on the subject, PC...clearly I have expressed an interest in the male perspective.



Another interesting perspective...thus, from my (limited) experience, it would seem that "one of the people or both of them in the relationship is doing something wrong" (since I see many gentlemen who are in other S.O. relationships)...

Are you suggesting that, everyone who isn't single and requests the company of an escort has some serious problems? Wow, I wonder what that percentage of perbites would be?

 

[thebuttdance continues]

For e in my relationships, I equate monogamy with honesty and nothing to do with the physical act of sex. I don't care if I'm the hottest thing on 2 legs, the best sex ever, the nicest person... Bla bla bla.... Men are not genetically wired for monogamy, and it's not always fair to expect it.... Their raging testosterone compels them to spread the seed lol
It's all biology baby!

I beg to differ Ms. Parker. As a man, I'm straight up monogamous and dedicated to the right woman... AND she'd be the hottest, sexiest thing on two lovely legs! I'd only love her biology

 

[Cami Parker]

Isn't that the truth? If more people would open their hearts and minds and take an honest look at their own thoughts and feelings as opposed to what society tells s to think, a lot of people may realize their only opposition is the judgement of others.... If you can love with an open heart and not rationalize with your mind... Just follow your heart and do what feels good... The world would e such a better place...

of course honesty and love can overcome all obstacles and barriers, so you just never know.... the tricky part is the difficulty in finding truly honest and loving people nowadays, but there are some out there, I think...

 

[Cami Parker]

Incredibly insightful and refreshing. A lot to be taken from that. Thank you so much for sharing that with me.im really loving the feedback on this thread

Hey Cami, not sure if you've seen Cherise's thread on an article about dating a SP.

 

[Cami Parker]

Here here!!! I agree wholeheartedly! I have never told someone "you are not allowed to be with anyone but me" I tell them to make their own choices and always be honest with me... And I have ad many monogamous relationships born out of pure choice, just like yours. Isn't that so much better than having a relationship where you feel the second you let go of the leash they're going to "break your rules" and jump into someone else's bed? My attitude has always been.,, if you'd rather be with somebody else, who am I to stop you? It's your life and I don't own you.... I may ate decisions of my own based on choices they make, but those choices are still their own to make.... I'm not a jailer, after all...

Monogomy is successful when it is chosen, not when it's imposed. Find sonmeone that you admire that you are attracted to that makes you feel like you are amazing, that accepts and supports you and doesnt need tosuffocate you and monogomy will be a natural result... a lot of the time. I was in a relationship once where it never crossed my mind to look elsewhere (which is generally not like me) because he was so amazing and was imho miles ahead of any competition he may have thought he had.;

 

[Cami Parker]

Great insight. I'm totally into your totally candid and honest though process in regards to this issue. Thanks so much for that!

Maybe a different thought on this.

A lot of my life I spent alone.
A big part of my life, after being alone I spent learning this social thing.


I don't really understand, why is it so hard, for people to have relationships.

I mean every where I go, I get into relationships with people it is so easy.

Having a thing with an sp is pretty normal. Like seriously.
the first time I saw an sp socially it was like what the fuck, what is going on here.

But like now its if she doesn't want to know me better, and see me socially, its like what the fuck, what is going on here.
People are social, if I meet someone, anyone and they don't want to know me better its like whats wrong.


sps are no different, its just a job.
you could be seeing someone go out to a party a bar, and she disappears and you see her flirting with some guy dancing with some guy,
do you fly off the handle get jealous, or do you trust that you will be the one going home with her.

I think monogamy is an issue, its not just sex. But different people give you different things.
My wife and me have a good time she is my companion friend. But so is my sp in a different way. Even my sp that I have seen for like ten years doesn't fill it all.

Can a person have to limit themselves to one person or even two.

This board seems like a relationship site at times, and I don't really get it.
Just be a nice guy, fake it if you have to, and laugh at yourself and pretty much everything don't take anything seriously, and trust me, everyone will want to be around you.

 

[Cami Parker]

Not cool if she wasn't honest with you upfront. Whether or not to date an SP is a very personal choice, and yours alone to make, not someone else's choice to make for you via deception... I hope you weren't badly hurt emotionally by the revelations...

This is interesting and amazing because I have dated a few chicks that I later found out to be escorts.

 

[Cami Parker]

Never say never, huh?
I like that

For me this is would be pretty subjective (like everything is ). With the right person in the right relationship structure? Sure.

It would definitely be a departure from any other type of relationship I've been in but life is all about new experiences.

 

[Cami Parker]

You're a very insightful and intelligent lady. I've really enjoyed reading your thoughts here. Thanks you for sharing so candidly. :cheer2::clap2::cheer2:

This is probably the topic of a whole new thread but I think what happens is that people promise monogamy because they think they should, or they think that's what it's going to take to get the girl/guy. Then, as time goes by, they can't keep the ruse up, and they find themselves with a 'situation' on their hands. They then have to scramble around looking for a solution that will not cost them their relationship, while still getting their needs met. Kinda complex, huh?

 

[hiddencloud]

Never say never, huh?
I like that

Never locks you out of possibilities that you'd otherwise never consider. I'm definitely not a "where the wind takes me" kind of guy but neither am I one with tunnel vision.

 

[Cami Parker]

Lol!!! I'm not saying that! I know a lot of men are truly monogamous, but it's a mental choice, it's not how biology was meant to be, I don't think.... And no it doesn't bother e if the person I end up dating is/was/started as a client. Not in the least. I look past titles to see people... My mind is open to everyone as I should be the last one to judge or generalize... But I think you are right that we could get into this quite a bit further, you and I, if we so choose. I love a friendly debate, they are one of the great joys of my life! A good debate is like the gym for your brain....

With all due respect doll.....I don't agree 100% with u on this. Most guys in general society, will not risk cheating due to a variety of reasons. 1) Kids -- endless reasons here. 2) ..religious / family reasons ..3) ..financial reasons which may come with age as well. Some guys could lose their future / fortune if they are in that postion.

I think you are listening to much to Gene Simmons ound: .




Your response to Borkos comment. If you are not worried what people around u think about what you are doing ( being a lady escort ) (I'm sure you said something along the lines in this thread ), then it shouldn't bother you whether the person you date is a client or not. In fact, a client, if you took a liken to him, would probably work out a lot better, simply because he already understands what you are involved in.

I'm not debating you and I tend to agree that men have that " cheating instinct " im them, I'm just saying that most, and I mean most, would not go through with it. Also, woman cheat as well. Just saying. But thats another ball game.

Wow....you and I could have a very interesting convo over drinks regarding this lol.

 

[Cami Parker]

It's nice to approach every situation in life with an open mind... Not to say that you won't decide against, but it's nice to give anything and everything life throws your way a fair shake...you never know how things could turn out!

Never locks you out of possibilities that you'd otherwise never consider. I'm definitely not a "where the wind takes me" kind of guy but neither am I one with tunnel vision.

 

[hiddencloud]

It's nice to approach every situation in life with an open mind... Not to say that you won't decide against, but it's nice to give anything and everything life throws your way a fair shake...you never know how things could turn out!

Exactly. I wish I could say I approach everything with an open mind but I'm not there yet.

 

[vancity_cowboy]

yes, of course

 

[BORKO]

You think? I'm always my 100% authentic self, regardless of present company or circumstance

Well then I'd think you are the only one then...

Wait, is Cami Parker your real name?