Getting stuff back after a breakup..

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gonzo34

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Mar 20, 2011
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I recently broke up with my girlfriend - or maybe she broke up with me, its not all that clear.

Anyway, she still has a some t-shirts and a sweater that belong to me and I kind of want them back. They are old and have sentimental value, although after 2 1/2 years they probably have some sentimental value for her too.

I don't want to be a douchebag and maybe I should just forget about it and move on. Or maybe I buy her a new sweater and get mine back? Or maybe I'm just using this as an excuse to make contact (she doesn't want to talk because she says it makes her sad but I miss talking to her)?

Thoughts? And I realize I will probably get flamed for asking a question like this on an escort review board but it seemed sort of relevant-ish.
 
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gonzo34

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borko said:
Sounds like that to me. I'd say unless you actually want to be friends you should go with a scorched earth policy.
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You're probably right, although its a really nice sweater - she definitely looks better in it than I ever did though. And the t-shirt is a black Armani one that I got when I thought that owning a black Armani t-shirt made me just too cool for school and it cost about half a month's salary. It has aged well though so I guess it would have been worth it if I still had the damn thing.

Its been a week since we had any type of contact - no calls, no emails, no texts - so I'm probably just moving through the break up phases. I've still to get to crying myself to sleep, getting drunk and shouting abuse at her front door in the middle of the night, having to apologize for getting drunk and shouting abuse at her front door in the middle of the night, looking at old photos and, always the last part, being able to jerk off while thinking about her (nobody ever rubs one out thinking about the current girlfriend, right? You always flick back through the mental files and once she is in there then its time to move on for good).

yazoo said:
I can go over and get them for you...
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That's a sweet offer! I'll send you her address - tell her I say hi!
 
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GATSBY

Registered Newb
May 16, 2011
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^ Similar idea, but get a mutual friend to get it back if they don't mind that is. I'd get it back if it has significant sentimental value. Or ebay and look for the same stuff? Good luck.
 
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vancity_cowboy

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Jan 27, 2008
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buddy of mine picked a babe up at dick's on dick's one night. she had just broken up with her bf so she took him home for a rebound fuck

he says not a bad fuck and she made a nice breakfast the next morning. it was raining out and he only had his club clothes, so she said look through here, they're going to the clothes box this afternoon. it was all her ex bf's clothes: shirts, pants, sweaters, jackets, suits - and they fit!

keep them she says, it'll save me a trip... take them all!

so he did

think about your clothes when you re-read that
 
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Aleister Crowley

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Mar 10, 2011
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thanks Gonzo for the black Tee , it fits a bit snug ......but she says It looks better on me than her ex.
geez , I hope the monster GOO stain from her droool washes out.
 
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bcneil

I am from BC
Aug 24, 2007
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A t-shirt makes you sound very petty.

In highschool I broke up with a girl that lived in Vancouver, I was still living in Aldergrove.
After we broke up, about 4 months later she wanted a cd she left in my car, and for me to return it.
I bought a new jewel case for the cd and a bubble envelope and mailed it to her, she claimed it arrived scratched and wanted me to buy a new one.
She got her mommy to call mine over the $14. Maybe you can get your mom to call hers?
 
badbadboy

badbadboy

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Nov 2, 2006
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Start a fresh and go buy yourself new T's and a great looking sweater.

I went through this trying to get some of my gear back after a nasty breakup and it wasn't worth it in the end. It just brought up all those negative thoughts and comments all over again. Anytime I had a break up after that it was natural to go have some retail therapy post break up. Probably why I have a huge wardrobe :clap2:

Move on and look sharp Gonzo :thumb:
 
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storm rider

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gonzo34 said:
I recently broke up with my girlfriend - or maybe she broke up with me, its not all that clear.

Anyway, she still has a some t-shirts and a sweater that belong to me and I kind of want them back. They are old and have sentimental value, although after 2 1/2 years they probably have some sentimental value for her too.

I don't want to be a douchebag and maybe I should just forget about it and move on. Or maybe I buy her a new sweater and get mine back? Or maybe I'm just using this as an excuse to make contact (she doesn't want to talk because she says it makes her sad but I miss talking to her)?

Thoughts? And I realize I will probably get flamed for asking a question like this on an escort review board but it seemed sort of relevant-ish.
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Cripes dude you are worried about a couple of shirts and a sweater!!!!!....let it go as you got off light.

Try having a soon to be ex wife co-habitate with you from Monday to Thursday and staying with a friend
on the weekend whilst methodically cleaning out the marital home on a Saturday/Sunday when you leave
to do stuff.....slowly removing damn near everything from the house that has any value.The icing on the
cake was coming home one day and she was cleaning out all of the food in the fridge/freezer/pantry but
she bolted fast when I walked in and saw it and said "the food too?...YOU FUCKING CUNT!!!!!!"


Give up the clothes and let her go....and be happy that she cant take you to the cleaners.

SR
 
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luvsdaty

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Nov 12, 2006
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It's over dude, move on.Don't text, don't call,don't stalk,don't even reply if she texts you.Go find someone that actually wants to be with you,more than likely she's already got another dude on top of her(the smart ones always have an exit strategy) Just remember all the tasty tail you got from her fondly & move on my friend.
 
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Ray

Well-known member
Dec 21, 2005
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vancouver
The OP sounds like he's a teenager.

I had a friend who got divorced after 20+ years.
While they were fighting over the property and assets in court, they continued to live under the same roof, with him moving into the basement. She started banging her new boyfriend right away in the marital bed, while the ex was in the basement. He was extremely hurt.

Fucking t-shirt? Give me a break.
 
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gonzo34

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Mar 20, 2011
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luvsdaty said:
It's over dude, move on.Don't text, don't call,don't stalk,don't even reply if she texts you.Go find someone that actually wants to be with you,more than likely she's already got another dude on top of her(the smart ones always have an exit strategy) Just remember all the tasty tail you got from her fondly & move on my friend.
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That's some pretty solid advice (although you could have left the part about the other dude out, bro...).

Thanks all for the words of advice and kindness. Thanks even to those who chose to remind me that she is going to go out and "get pounded", something I'm sure I knew but prefer not to contemplate.

Still, its a really nice sweater..... ;)
 
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87112

Banned
Dec 13, 2004
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Exit strategies- welcome to the wonderful world of relationships. Never thought about it in my 20s but now do thanks to well I'll try to let it go.
 
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gonzo34

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No need to apologize LiJ. I've been round the block a few times, I know how things work. Whether I think she is banging some other guy or not, she doesn't owe me anything (other than a sweater and some T-shirts!) and has the right to do what she wants. I'm sure that if the opportunity to get lucky presents itself I will take advantage, even if it is only because that's usually the best way to clear your head after a breakup.

Most of the comments on this thread have been fair enough and its a good way to keep me from texting on her on the pretence of getting my things back. I'm sure we all know how easy it is to inadvisedly pick up the phone when you are on your own or have had a couple of drinks...

I wouldn't have put it out there if I wasn't ready for a couple of home truths.
 
badbadboy

badbadboy

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Nov 2, 2006
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Send her an email asking nicely for your stuff back and a neutral place to exchange it.

If she tells you to F off, up the ante like breaking a car window. $300 out of her pocket and do it again when she gets it replaced. Make it the most costly sweater and T shirts she has ever owned.

(this is the bad side of badbadboy giving advise :pound:)
 
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gonzo34

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I think this captures the feeling...

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/XVk_e31dnlE" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
 
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