Dating an escort

[tukmol]

Hello guys and girls, pooners and providers. I am making this post because there has been something that I have needed to get off my chest that has been bothering me. I need and welcome your help and advice.

About me: I am in my late twenties that has had zero experience in dating girls for last 15 years or so. I am awkward, have confidence and self-esteem issues. You might as well call me beta. I'm certainly not an alpha.

When I get lonely I go to see a provider. Most of the time the experience is awkward for me because I guess I am looking for that emotional connection? I saw a provider - I'll call her "N" - about four weeks ago and as always I was awkward. I did not even get to do the deed. But there was something about N that caught my attention, something beyond the sex and service. So I a few days later I see her again. Same thing. This may sound stupid and I feel like it may be but I start seeing her just to get to know her. I start booking her for long "dates" so that she does not have to work. Eventually we start going out but all while I had the time booked. She even gave me her personal number and we start texting. I find out though that she gives her number to other potential regulars that might also want to book long dates with her. As she says, she needs the money and there is competition.

We talk about stuff, some personal and some just random stuff. I am afraid I have fallen for her. I told her this. I was very straight forward and maybe I shouldn't have been. Because now I get the feeling that she may be just misleading me. I have asked her out on different occasions and she has always said she'll let me know when she has a day off or just simply "I'll let you know." I have my flaws and she has been very honest with pointing it out with me. Like what I am doing wrong and whatnot. I know it is a very weird situation, for me especially. I feel like when I see her it doesn't even feel like I'm just another client anymore. I don't know about her though. We don't even do the usual accompanied shower, scrub down, etc - unlike the first couple times I saw her. We just go straight to her room and talk. She shows me affection. She's a totally different person from when I saw her the first couple times.

I don't know... Maybe I'm being neurotic and over thinking things but I fear that maybe she is already involved with someone else. Maybe another person just like me that has taken a liking to her but also someone that is better than me. An alpha. I've sensed from out conversations that she's most likely attracted to those kind of guys. She's said that I'm too nice sometimes. I hate the fact that the only way I get to see her is when I book an appointment with her. I know I am being neurotic or even insecure but I also need to know if she is just leading me on. Whenever I am with her I'm happy and I've even slowly changed a bit. More confident and just more relaxed and not worried that I am not good enough for her.

I have rambled on for too long. My apologies if this post has been all over the place and incoherent but that is how my state of mind is right now. If there are any of you who, providers and pooners alike, who have had a similar experience, I would appreciate your help and advice.

Many thanks.

 

[the old maxx50]

I been in the same boat as you , lack of confidence , and shy around women i still am today but i was 50 i stated seeing escorts which help me a lot .. and i fell for a few . But if i had to book a session I still did what i went for .. . It is not dating .
Where i got involved is out side of a booked session. helping out if they need ed it .. money wise also . But you do get taken advantage of , and i have ..

You will find that the old saing hooker with a heart of gold is often true ,, but it does not mean that they are attracted to you , just that they care .. Don't take advantage of it and don't let them take advantage of you . i know it will happen because we are lonely ..

these days i have a few girls i have meet through the business i look at them as good friends . but not my girl friend .. we just l get a long ad i help them out Good or not it is what i have and makes every day a little better..

We will have feeling the same as if we are dating and have a girl friend .. lets face it that is what we are missing and it is ni each mans nature ..

But unless she is the one calling you up and wanting to go out will with on a date . and not a payed booking then .. she is not a girl friend ..

Your feeling of fear , of doubt will only get you in shit .. Respect her boundaries .. Respect her privacy . If she want to tell you personal stuff, she truest you .. but don't think of it more then that .. Our thoughts are our biggest enemy .. with any relationship ..

 

[tukmol]

Yes I know she is not my girlfriend. And I have asked her about it and she said time will tell. We have been intimate and it has been getting better lately.

You are right though, I need to respect her boundaries and privacy. I am learning a lot actually. Both about her and for me personally.

I guess my main problem is my lack of experience coupled with the fact that the girl I fell for happens to be a provider.

Am I giving her too much benefit of a doubt? That maybe she's not that kind of person to take advantage of someone?

 

[tantalizeme]

Here we go again!

I start booking her for long "dates" so that she does not have to work. Eventually we start going out but all while I had the time booked. She even gave me her personal number and we start texting. I find out though that she gives her number to other potential regulars that might also want to book long dates with her. As she says, she needs the money and there is competition.

We talk about stuff, some personal and some just random stuff. I am afraid I have fallen for her. I told her this. I was very straight forward and maybe I shouldn't have been. Because now I get the feeling that she may be just misleading me. I have asked her out on different occasions and she has always said she'll let me know when she has a day off or just simply "I'll let you know." I have my flaws and she has been very honest with pointing it out with me. Like what I am doing wrong and whatnot.

Hey brother,

Heartwarming first post. There're dozens of long threads on the topic of "Dating an SP"—you might want to use the search function.

All the same, I foresee this too is going to become a long thread, full of profound advice. So I'll give you my perspective, as someone who also once fell for an SP (a Chinese AMP lady with a degree in English literature!)

Dating an SP has definite advantages, especially if you're sexually insecure. The SP can give you pointers about how to be a better lover.

And, for a masochist, dating an SP is ideal—especially if she keeps charging you for social time.

The more your romantic feelings deepen, the kinkier the gratification you can derive from knowing she's being lustfully ravaged by other pooners while you mostly just hold hands with her, perhaps smooch a little, and talk about possibilities for the future.

Sure hope you've meanwhile gotten around to physically consummating this relationship? Brother, this SP must be very impressed by you, the way you delayed acting on brute sexual desire to give the loving feelings a chance to build!

It's always a sure sign of the magnitude of a woman's respect for a man that she's very honest in letting him know of his flaws. You can probably milk this particular relationship for a truckload of bittersweet pain, at least until you're broke.

Just out of curiosity, how much have you invested in this lady so far? Clearly, if the investment is already fairly large, you don't want to lose it all by pulling out. A relationship like this is bound to work out if you only keep pumping enough cash into it.

 

[tukmol]

Hello tantalize,

First of I would like to say what an honor it is for you to reply to my post. I have read your reviews and they are the stuff of legends. For me, at least. :thumb:

Almost everytime I've seen her there has been physical intimacy. Everytime it happened it was unavoidable. Sometimes she initiated it, sometimes I did. But like I said I was awkward the first few times. We even talked about this. Particularly me not lasting long enough. She did say however that I am doing one thing right. I didn't bother asking her what that is. The last time I saw her was better. She even said it herself that I was getting better and went "wow, who are you??" lol. Not to give details but the encounter was not the typical service she provides.

Well that's another thing I worry about. I am not made of money and eventually the time will come when I won't be able to see her as much anymore and that will be it. I talked to her about this before and she said she understood. She did say one time that she wanted to see me more.

 

[tukmol]

Just out of curiosity, how much have you invested in this lady so far? Clearly, if the investment is already fairly large, you don't want to lose it all by pulling out. A relationship like this is bound to work out if you only keep pumping enough cash into it.

That is something I'd like to keep to myself.

 

[FunSugarDaddy]

I am not made of money and eventually the time will come when I won't be able to see her as much anymore and that will be it. I talked to her about this before and she said she understood. She did say one time that she wanted to see me more.

Put it this way if I were you I'd get off the clock ASAP, then you'll know exactly where you stand.

 

[westcoast555]

Hello guys and girls, pooners and providers. I am making this post because there has been something that I have needed to get off my chest that has been bothering me. I need and welcome your help and advice.

About me: I am in my late twenties that has had zero experience in dating girls for last 15 years or so. I am awkward, have confidence and self-esteem issues. You might as well call me beta. I'm certainly not an alpha.

When I get lonely I go to see a provider. Most of the time the experience is awkward for me because I guess I am looking for that emotional connection? I saw a provider - I'll call her "N" - about four weeks ago and as always I was awkward. I did not even get to do the deed. But there was something about N that caught my attention, something beyond the sex and service. So I a few days later I see her again. Same thing. This may sound stupid and I feel like it may be but I start seeing her just to get to know her. I start booking her for long "dates" so that she does not have to work. Eventually we start going out but all while I had the time booked. She even gave me her personal number and we start texting. I find out though that she gives her number to other potential regulars that might also want to book long dates with her. As she says, she needs the money and there is competition.

We talk about stuff, some personal and some just random stuff. I am afraid I have fallen for her. I told her this. I was very straight forward and maybe I shouldn't have been. Because now I get the feeling that she may be just misleading me. I have asked her out on different occasions and she has always said she'll let me know when she has a day off or just simply "I'll let you know." I have my flaws and she has been very honest with pointing it out with me. Like what I am doing wrong and whatnot. I know it is a very weird situation, for me especially. I feel like when I see her it doesn't even feel like I'm just another client anymore. I don't know about her though. We don't even do the usual accompanied shower, scrub down, etc - unlike the first couple times I saw her. We just go straight to her room and talk. She shows me affection. She's a totally different person from when I saw her the first couple times.

I don't know... Maybe I'm being neurotic and over thinking things but I fear that maybe she is already involved with someone else. Maybe another person just like me that has taken a liking to her but also someone that is better than me. An alpha. I've sensed from out conversations that she's most likely attracted to those kind of guys. She's said that I'm too nice sometimes. I hate the fact that the only way I get to see her is when I book an appointment with her. I know I am being neurotic or even insecure but I also need to know if she is just leading me on. Whenever I am with her I'm happy and I've even slowly changed a bit. More confident and just more relaxed and not worried that I am not good enough for her.

I have rambled on for too long. My apologies if this post has been all over the place and incoherent but that is how my state of mind is right now. If there are any of you who, providers and pooners alike, who have had a similar experience, I would appreciate your help and advice.

Many thanks.

Laddie... be careful. You're walking down a road you will regret. Don't do this. Just walk away... and don't think of yourself in terms of Alpha/Beta. It's counterproductive.

There's lots of girls out there.. find one.

 

[newatit]

Threads have run on this subject so many times. Look Back at the thread on being manipulated that ran a month ago. You are being manipulated out of a lot of money likely but if you're getting service equal to the value go for it. When you wake up come back and tell us.

 

[badbadboy]

tukmol

I am speaking from experience as I have seen one SP weekly for a pretty long time. Sure I text on her personal number, call her by her real name, have lots of play in and out of the bedroom, we go shopping together, we have similar hobbies and we go on vacations together. I know she has her regulars and that is part of her life that I respect and will not try to change it.

I suggest you sit back and enjoy your time for what it is when you are together. She has another life as do you (of at least you should ).

Most SP's are not looking for a White Knight to rescue them from their chosen career and no matter how much money you throw her way it will not change the inevitable. These Indy's are running a business and that will not change until they decides to make a change.

 

[PlayfulAlex]

Speaking in strictly general terms, most single SPs would probably like to meet someone, maybe even fantasize about getting together with a client (I'm quite sure that has actually happened).

But, since the job involves being nice, and receiving remuneration for doing so, you will always wonder about her true intentions. If you can afford to make her an offer she can't refuse, do so, and see what her response is. Her answer will tell you what you need to know.

You probably don't want to hear what we're all saying here, that you may be delusional about her feelings, because your feelings are getting in the way of seeing clearly. But you wouldn't have come here to ask it, if you didn't think the folks here were the right folks to ask! So listen up!

 

[bigbark]

Buddy,
One word of advice, don't spend another penny seeing this girl.. If you are a beta and awkward go find some sp that
Makes you feel at ease do the deed. Keep doing that gain some confidence learn to get comfortable around women. You will be amazed how doing that will make you become an alpha male. Why do you think she wants to see you$$$$$
I know lots of women who want to go out when I am offering a great meal night out and tab on me. I want the women who calls me just wanting to hang out.... Spend some time around some good sps read reviews be honest with the sps and take the first step to really changing your life brother.......

 

[bigbark]

You might be served well to start with the hottie vannesssa those pics get anyone drooling......

 

[PlayfulAlex]

A little gender-reversal but this song is about a guy who has the money and wants to spend it on the girl. But she's not after the money, she just wants to be with him...

Here are some of the important lyrics from the song:

"But I mean it when I say the world is your's
Hear you said something
There's something to be
She said I want you, the bling mean nuttin' to me
She said let's chill
I said my hotel tell sit 5 star
Said said naw
We'll go to motel 6
And the eyes don't lie
Nether do I
Neither does she
We just wanna ride the vehicle
It can be in any part of the world
Any side of the seat
She don't care, if she ride with me"

Is this making sense to you, Sweetie?

 

[87112]

After reading all these dating SPs threads, just who do SPs end up with in the end when they quit. It can be Joe Blow on 20 bucks an hour living in Vancouver cause he will be facing a life with mortgage payments and that is obscene words to a SP. Really why dont guys just chase a working girl from the bank, grocery store? Youre not going to please them EVER.

 

[the old maxx50]

Actually .. as i have seen .. the ex Sp does just want a hot working guy that makes 30$ hr , likes to go to bars. but has enough sense to buy a house and look after the family because in the end that seem tobe what every one want , a happy family .?/???

Prob expecting to much from most single men .. unless they are in there 50s , But even then most have had a marriage or to , a few grown kids and are set in their ways ..

Bad girls , and bad ass guys... not sure what there choses are .

 

[normisanas]

You may be looking for any sign that there is hope for u and her, be it going outrageously overtime, personal details, real name, bbfs, etc., But if she never has actual sex with you without you paying for it, despite anythkng she says, you're her client first before anything else.

 

[tukmol]

Yea I don't know her real name yet.

 

[Lurker 123]

Yea I don't know her real name yet.

I am sorry for being blunt. You haven't set your foot in her heart yet!
Please listen to all the advice from all the experienced guys here.

All the best!

 

[jblurps]

Tukmol, you sound similar to me. I'm about the same age as you and I see providers for the same reason. I've been in this hobby for almost 9 years now. I've never tried to date an escort outside the hobby though.