I am a new member but been watching the board for a while. I have read this thread and i know late response but have first hand knowledge with this topic. I married a lady 2 years ago that was in the buisness at the time. Yes she is chinese and was only in the business a short time about 6 months. She left the buisness before we married and will never return.
I dont feel i rescued her i found someone who is a special person who was only trying to take care of her parents. She is mature smart and of course very loving. Her english is good so comunication is fine and she is honest. She is working a regular job now and has never been a burden or a drain on me financially.
At first when we dated i worried about running into someone she dated but over time that is a non issue as she has not been working for 3 years now.
It happened one time but we just walked away. She is loving and a very good person. We have been together 2 years and we have our problems like any couple but in life there is nothing for sure.
She feels very guilty about doing the work and didnt like it. We talked about the dark side of it and she decided the money was not worth the risk.
That chapter of her life is behind her and we never talk about it anymore even if angry.
I guess my point to this is to give my view is that anything can work if you respect each other and as i said i am proud of her for what she does today not the past. All is i know there are risks in life but i am happy overall.
Hey dave443,
Congratulations, brother, on your courage to see the relationship potential in a "mature, smart and of course very loving" Chinese lady that, by force of circumstance, worked for a period as an SP. She has no good reason to feel "guilty"—there's
absolutely nothing morally wrong with spreading happiness through giving massage with one's hands, or using any other part of one's body to give pleasure.
It's also great that your wife has adjusted to "working a regular job" for maybe $10-20/hr when before, she could make ten times that for possibly way less effort. The difficulty of such adjustment would be one of my major worries.
May I ask if you had to sponsor your current wife as an immigrant—which, I understand, entails the risk of 10 years of financial responsibility for a person? If so, I admire your guts to take a leap of faith here; I wonder if I could. It would take a very special lady, that's for sure.
I've met about half a dozen mature but still very pretty micro girls over the past 2 years—none, alas, with much education, ability to communicate in English, or any evident sense of purpose or direction—who gave me the impression (or told me outright) they would love to give up their current, deeply unsatisfying situation for a nice husband and a regular job. For the right kind of guy, they could make terrific life partners.
Sure beats travelling life's journey nursing one's solitude, doesn't it? I wish you continued happiness with your chosen lady, brother. I certainly don't want to idealize Asian ladies—and overgeneralize about the traits of realistically available Western women—but you probably feel, most of the time, that you've hit it lucky. Hope also you have the kind of great sex life that most married guys in our society can only dream about.
Should you run into serious trouble—and are willing to consider counseling—PM me, and I'd happily recommend an exceptional counselor who specializes in these kinds of relationships and has helped me get through several tough spots in the past.
Thanks for coming on here and contributing. And if, in spite of being in a committed relationship, you seek occasional erotic diversity with SPs, that's totally healthy for a normally-sexed guy. Don't let anyone suggest there's something wrong with it. Of course, if your wife approves—as does my GF—so much the better!