Jim's Last Post?

[jim]

Just When You Think Things Are Settling

So as I was getting settled into my cage after being let out to take care of some 'business'

(nudge nudge, wink wink, know what I mean? know what I mean?).​

I was all ready to have a bite to eat (great eats in my little bit of heaven, gawd she's great at a LOT of things including cooking!) when I heard the door open, she was on the phone and said yes certainly I can lend him out for a bit.

I'm think wtf? 'lend'? Well I was told that I was flying home for an 'adventure'. That's all I was told, other than I'd need to be in my room at the old folks home before 5:30pm. A plane would be waiting for me to take me 'home' to the cage when my 'adventure' was done.

I'm not sure where to begin to describe my adventure other than to say I will have to wait till I see the sun of the morning to figure out if this has just been a dream or real incredible treat.

Well we are on the runway so I got to submit this. See you on the other side assuming I can get some cell reception.

 

[jim]

Things Are A Changing

Well, you'd think that once you reach my age that life would kinda be 'normal', you know a nice walker, good room at the old folks home, the odd sponge bath from the hot nurse.

BUT​

That would be just boring wouldn't it? I wish we could embed videos in the General Discussion area. Did any of you note that I embedded a link to a video about 6 posts before this one? You didn't? You should go back and check.

Well good old Jim found on YouTube a song by that young whipper snapper Sam Cooke that describes an update to my situation.

Yes another change in my situation. This time she didn't spring it on me (whoops did I let it slip that my captor is a she? ), I've been informed that I will need to accompany my darling on a trip back to E-Town. We'll be rolling in on the weekend, I've asked if I could sit in the front seat but I think she wants to extend (whoops she again my bad!) the whole sex slave thing until we are back in town, so into the trunk with me in a day or so.

 

[uncleg]

So, Jim since you are becoming a travelling trunk expert, a quick question. Since eddie is considering a trip to the wet coast to straighten out MERL issues with the local chapter..............................and he is demanding, can you imagine, eddie demanding, a limousine to pick him up, do think the trunk of a Lincoln towncar is large enough for him and a suitcase or two ?????


By the way, why is the "sex" in the "whole sex slave thing" so small, something to do with dick size.....................or amount of......... or..........................?

 

[edmontonsubbie]

So, Jim since you are becoming a travelling trunk expert, a quick question. Since eddie is considering a trip to the wet coast to straighten out MERL issues with the local chapter..............................and he is demanding, can you imagine, eddie demanding, a limousine to pick him up, do think the trunk of a Lincoln towncar is large enough for him and a suitcase or two ?????


By the way, why is the "sex" in the "whole sex slave thing" so small, something to do with dick size.....................or amount of......... or..........................?

Oh.....it's to be a domestic vehicle. I had thought that I was Benz worthy at the least. But, no matter. Don't you worry about the junk in the trunk Jim, I've got the holy napkins with me and an agenda engraved on to the head of the Merl pin. We'll get these Western upstarts looked after.....or, at least, get them so hammered they will give up on the W.

 

[mistressfreyja]

Screw the Benz, ask for a Malbach or Bentley.

Maybe I will get to drive.....hold on!!!!!!!!!!!!

Actually, just kidding. The only vehicle I can pass on the highway is the VW bus'. I'm used to gutless grandma driving. You should hear my horn, though. Meep meep....(think Little Miss Sunshine.)

Eddie, you should stuff Jim in your suitcase. Clearly he enjoys tight, confined spaces.

PS: Good luck on that, Eddie WERL.

Oh.....it's to be a domestic vehicle. I had thought that I was Benz worthy at the least. But, no matter. Don't you worry about the junk in the trunk Jim, I've got the holy napkins with me and an agenda engraved on to the head of the Merl pin. We'll get these Western upstarts looked after.....or, at least, get them so hammered they will give up on the W.[/QUOTE]

 

[uncleg]

Oh.....it's to be a domestic vehicle. I had thought that I was Benz worthy at the least. But, no matter. Don't you worry about the junk in the trunk Jim, I've got the holy napkins with me and an agenda engraved on to the head of the Merl pin. We'll get these Western upstarts looked after.....or, at least, get them so hammered they will give up on the W.

or so hammered we won't be able to tell the difference between M & W. Mind you that will involve significant overtime on your behalf to be able to afford to get everybody that drunk................I hear Hunka and the Punt are bottomless pits in that regard.

Screw the Benz, ask for a Malbach or Bentley.

Maybe I will get to drive.....hold on!!!!!!!!!!!!

Actually, just kidding. The only vehicle I can pass on the highway is the VW bus'. I'm used to gutless grandma driving. You should hear my horn, though. Meep meep....(think Little Miss Sunshine.)

Eddie, you should stuff Jim in your suitcase. Clearly he enjoys tight, confined spaces.

PS: Good luck on that, Eddie WERL.


Actually, most guys enjoy tight spaces..........................MERL on............

Oh.....it's to be a domestic vehicle. I had thought that I was Benz worthy at the least. But, no matter. Don't you worry about the junk in the trunk Jim, I've got the holy napkins with me and an agenda engraved on to the head of the Merl pin. We'll get these Western upstarts looked after.....or, at least, get them so hammered they will give up on the W.[/QUOTE]

 

[jim]

Back in E-TOWN!!!

So, Jim since you are becoming a travelling trunk expert, a quick question. Since eddie is considering a trip to the wet coast to straighten out MERL issues with the local chapter..............................and he is demanding, can you imagine, eddie demanding, a limousine to pick him up, do think the trunk of a Lincoln towncar is large enough for him and a suitcase or two ?????


By the way, why is the "sex" in the "whole sex slave thing" so small, something to do with dick size.....................or amount of......... or..........................?

I believe that Eddie should be picked up in an AMG S63. After all you need to make a good impression in order to retained your satellite chapter status.


As far as the size of the descriptor of the kind of slave I have been was only an attempt on my part to not sound like I was bragging.

 

[Synshine]

Jim, there's only one Jim who's allowed to split his infinitives; unfortunately, you're not that Jim.

I can force any man to "split an infinitive"............

 

[jim]

I can force any man to "split an infinitive"............

Whenever I think of you my zipper splits

 

[jim]

On The Road Again.....

Whenever I think of you my zipper splits

Sunday afternoon I had to head to the store to buy some new pants because well....

Old man Jim has an update on my status. Over the last week or so I've shared some background on how I get myself into 'those situations'...

From various postings:

I shuffle in through the front doors, it's much better now that they installed the automatic doors, and who should I spot at the front desk but good old Attila the Hun aka Nurse Mildred Ratched. She's a real witch who isn't a people person at all. I caught her more than once unplugging my scooter from it's recharging station so that I miss out on the extracurricular activities like shuffle board at the Lions Club.

As most of you know I have been away for a while and a week ago I started my trip back to E-Town. This afternoon I was reading the newspaper in the solarium at the old folks home I reside in when Nurse Ratched came up to me. Now I've never admitted this but both times I ended up in the trunk of a car, it was Nurse Ratched who played an integral in getting me in there. (I keep forgetting cause I think she substitutes sugar pills for my Ginkgo Biloba).

WTF? Why in tar-nation is someone knocking on my door at this hour? Hmmm it's Nurse Ratched.

Well Milly (She hates it when I call her that) told me to get my warm coat, gloves and hat on. I say what for? She replies "It's a fire drill you old coot, now get your skinny ass out there or burn to a crisp. Either way I get paid." I muttered under my breath, "you biatch" as I shuffled passed her to the exit. It was a very quiet evacuation, nobody was in the hallways and nary a siren or flashing red light t be seen.

As I get out, Ratched firmly grabs my arm and says "since you are my favourite lecherous old man I've arranged a ride for you to keep you out of the cold". Tears started to well up in my eyes as this expression of humanity was being expressed by Mildred. Now with the cold weather the tears froze and blurred my vision. I hear Mildred say "We are here, now climb in" I lifted my leg and suddenly I was picked up and rolled onto my back, then a sudden "thud" and a banging over my head, I heard a muffled "Okay he's all yours god bless you lady". Suddenly I sense that I'm in motion. There is a some heat here and my tears melt and as I wipe my eyes I realize; hmmm this place looks familiar.

On the road again I am. Once I have some time to update my status I'll do it here.

Take care all.

 

[Bad Santa]

On The Road Again........

Jim, you are growing far too fond of this "blessed" lady's trunk. What is it about her "rear end" that you find so fascintating anyway??

 

[jim]

Well it was a longer than usual trip but the trunk has been upgraded with a few more creature comforts. I'm back in behind the main house in my cage which has really become a comfy place as well. I have no full time internet access but I do find ways to spend my time productively. As usual I do not know how long I'll be here or if I'll ever be back in Edmonton.


Today I did get a chance to get to my iPhone and I decided to share my updated status with you. I did read what Bad Santa wrote below:

Jim, you are growing far too fond of this "blessed" lady's trunk. What is it about her "rear end" that you find so fascintating anyway??

Bad Santa, as I stated above the trunk has been made a little more comfortable and while I'm not 'fond' of the travel method the destination is truly a piece of heaven and well worth the trip.

On to your question, all I can say is:

ARE YOU DAFT??????​

That is the only reason I can think of for you even posing the question. Well there are a couple of others. You do seem to spend a LOT of time with those pointy eared male elves with the high pitched voices.... Perhaps you really do no have a clue why it is so facinitating After all we know the whole Mrs Claus thing is a sham, hell she's gone on record as saying you only cum once a year!

The other reason you would have to ask that question is: after all those years of sitting behind the reindeer and inhaling reindeer farts you are suffering from grievous brain damage.

I guess I've pretty much nixed any chances of an Xmas gift from the jolly old red suited elf. I hear the back door opening. It's time for my mid morning (nah I better not say, you'd be jealous). Gotta hit submit reply and get ready for....

 

[Bad Santa]

Well it was a longer than usual trip but the trunk has been upgraded with a few more creature comforts. I'm back in behind the main house in my cage which has really become a comfy place as well. I have no full time internet access but I do find ways to spend my time productively. As usual I do not know how long I'll be here or if I'll ever be back in Edmonton.


Today I did get a chance to get to my iPhone and I decided to share my updated status with you. I did read what Bad Santa wrote below:



Bad Santa, as I stated above the trunk has been made a little more comfortable and while I'm not 'fond' of the travel method the destination is truly a piece of heaven and well worth the trip.

On to your question, all I can say is:

ARE YOU DAFT??????​

That is the only reason I can think of for you even posing the question. Well there are a couple of others. You do seem to spend a LOT of time with those pointy eared male elves with the high pitched voices.... Perhaps you really do no have a clue why it is so facinitating After all we know the whole Mrs Claus thing is a sham, hell she's gone on record as saying you only cum once a year!

The other reason you would have to ask that question is: after all those years of sitting behind the reindeer and inhaling reindeer farts you are suffering from grievous brain damage.

I guess I've pretty much nixed any chances of an Xmas gift from the jolly old red suited elf. I hear the back door opening. It's time for my mid morning (nah I better not say, you'd be jealous). Gotta hit submit reply and get ready for....

WOW! What brought that on Jim???

I just asked a simple little "ironic" question. Your old hide seems to be getting pretty thin. Must be your ass rubbing on that trunk lid while you're trying to grab a peek at your lady driver's rear end through your peephole.

Glad you're getting your mid morning Ooh La La. Otherwise, you'd just be too cranky even for an old guy!

 

[jim]

YAWN Stretch

I'm just up from my recuperation er nappy nap and the cell coverage gods are working for me!

WOW! What brought that on Jim???

Bad Santa,

I didn't mean to come across as an ornery old geezer and for this I apologize. (Must use more in my replies) What I was trying to convey is that while I welcome your interest in my little adventure I really must question the older guy's sanity if he has to ask a question such as:

What is it about her "rear end" that you find so fascintating anyway??

My god Santa, I thought that would have been as obvious as the big black belt around your waist!

I just asked a simple little "ironic" question. Your old hide seems to be getting pretty thin. Must be your ass rubbing on that trunk lid while you're trying to grab a peek at your lady driver's rear end through your peephole.

I'm a good boy and never try to peek. The surprises have always been pleasant and I know I'm in good hands .

Glad you're getting your mid morning Ooh La La. Otherwise, you'd just be too cranky even for an old guy!

No worries about being cranky with my schedule .

I hear the back door again, time for some pre dinner exercise.

P.S.

I'll still be putting out a high fiber cookie and a glass of skim milk out for you and carrots for your herd. Not sure where yet, but I believe that you will find me.

 

[Bad Santa]

P.S.

I'll still be putting out a high fiber cookie and a glass of skim milk out for you and carrots for your herd. Not sure where yet, but I believe that you will find me.

Thanks for being so thoughtful Jim. I guess you know what it takes to be a "regular" guy!

 

[jim]

Wow How Did It Get To Be 10:15?

Once the sun goes down it is so easy to lose track of time. I was summoned from my cage late this afternoon and I was just sent back about 10 minutes ago. I'm going to have a great sleep tonight, totally spent.


You know Bad Santa, I don't think I've ever been called a 'regular' guy. Usually called an extraordinary guy, an extremely nice guy or even a 'special' guy. (Not the short yellow bus kind of special).

Thanks for being so thoughtful Jim. I guess you know what it takes to be a "regular" guy!

Santa, I hope you got my note with my gift requests.

Night night big guy!

 

[Bad Santa]

You know Bad Santa, I don't think I've ever been called a 'regular' guy. Usually called an extraordinary guy, an extremely nice guy or even a 'special' guy. (Not the short yellow bus kind of special).

Jim, at your age you should know that it's easier to be "extraordinary" and "special" when you are also "regular".

Obviously you do know that regularity is important since you keep those high fibre cookies in your pantry!

Milk and cookies, oh so important. Believe me Santa knows!

 

[uncleg]

Jim, at your age you should know that it's easier to be "extraordinary" and "special" when you are also "regular".

Obviously you do know that regularity is important since you keep those high fibre cookies in your pantry!

Milk and cookies, oh so important. Believe me Santa knows!

Think we found your missing elf..................

probably why Jim likes that trunk so much..........................

Oh indeed, milk and cookies...................

 

[Bad Santa]

Think we found your missing elf..................

probably why Jim likes that trunk so much..........................

That's where she went!?!

Oh indeed, milk and cookies...................

Now, now Uncle G, are you implying I get into more than just the milk and cookies. I assure you I rarely fall off the wagon, er, I mean sleigh!

 

[jim]

Beautiful Day in the back 40

Great day out here and to top it off I have some cell coverage.

Seems to be pretty quiet on the board which is good since I don't have much time. Uncleg please don't be mistaken about the reason I 'like' the trunk. I've said from the beginning that I am alone in said trunk. The driver is who makes the trip in the trunk worthwhile.

[/B]

Think we found your missing elf..................

probably why Jim likes that trunk so much..........................

​