Your favorite quote(s)

[seannachie]

"Lead, follow, or get out of the way!"

"Change can happen at the speed of thought."

"Don't let your mouth write cheques that your body can't cash."

 

[ComicalKazee]

I was in a restaurant once. I ordered a chicken sandwich. The waitress obviously didn't understand. She said "How would you like your eggs?" I said "Incubated. Then raised. Then with the head cut off, and plucked. Then cut up and cooked and put on a bun". Then I said "Fuck it. This is taking too long.... Scrambled".
Mitch Hedberg

 

[Danika]

Men are like parking spaces...

All the good ones are taken...

And the rest are handicapped.