Yo Momma's so poor..

[Randy Whorewald]

YO MOMMA'S SO POOR...

...when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, she said, "Moving."

...she can't afford to pay attention.

…when someone rings her doorbell, she says, "Ding!"

…she went to McDonald's and put a milkshake on layaway.

...I stepped through her front door and fell out the back.


...when she goes to KFC, she has to lick other people's fingers.

 

[hitrack]

Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."

 

[rygu]

Yo mamma's so fat, she sells shade in the summertime.

 

[Witty1]

Your family is so poor, they have to eat a large pizza outside.

Your house is so small, I threw rock in the window and hit everybody.

Your dick is so small, you have to pee on your nuts.

Your momma is so fat she has to iron her pants in the driveway.

 

[dirtydan]

Here's my 10

10) Your momma is so ugly that after she met Bill Clinton he's been completely faithful to Hillary.


9) Your momma is so fat and ugly that you know when your daddy is hard up for sex is when he comes home with baking soda and a brown paper bag.


8) Your momma is so fat that when your daddy calls her "the little woman" he falls to the floor laughing his guts out.


7) Your momma is so fat that her farts register on a seismograph in China.


6) Your momma is so ugly that a lesbian would give your daddy a mercy fuck.


5) Your momma is so fat that your daddy's mini van is a train locomotive and flatdeck car.


4) Your momma is so fat that when she waddles by a farm even the pigs yell in disgust "you're a fat fucking pig!"


3) Your momma is so fat that when she is in a foreign country there is a famine the next day.


2) Your momma is so fat and ugly that the only work she can get is posing naked for calenders for Catholic priests.


1) Your momma is a so goddamn fucking ugly that in a contest for the world's ugliest woman that the runner-up looked at your momma and then committed suicide.