*~* would you date an sp? *~*

[Banger77]

WOW Ms.Parker, you touch off a interesting firestorm of a thread here.

Ok well if you treat your boy as good or better as any client, then are you available?

I know you're teasing me, but I'll indulge you Baby! YES, when I'm in a relationship, I'm cooking, massaging, cleaning and giving great bjs all day, doing whatever I can to make my man happy. If I commit myself to trying to develop and maintain a relationship I'm committed 100%. That being said, while I am currently single, I'm not available. I'm a full time student and I have you guys too, and my friends.... I don't feel that I can dedicate the time and effort required to nurture such a relationship right now. Besides, all you lovely charming gentlemen have so gallantly agreed to tend to all my physical needs, so I will be my own boyfriend for now... Take myself to dinner and a movie, get myself a dozen pink roses a week and buy my own chocolates. HOWEVER... If anything should change in the near future, I promise you will be the first to know!
Deal?

Hypothetical speaking here, you kind of have a unique situation Ms.Parker; you are not just a SP but one with some notoriety which makes any relationship your in just a little bit more tougher to navigate.

My thought on this would be more of a need for some psychological reinforcement for said future BF than the physical treatment. It doesn't matter how confident or assured that guy is; that tiny thought of you being shared is always in the back of his head. Not sure if that makes any sense to you.

Understandable... But I think you could keep that fact within the safety of your own relationship....I think the "100% honesty" applies only to each other. The story you tell others outside of your relationship can be drawn up between the 2 of you....

If you felt compelled to be honest with those outside if your relationship, you could always say "we met online" lol

If you were dating a former client, your second statement "we met online" is actually quite true. :eyebrows: lol

 

[Banger77]

Honestly, It is really challenging to find a partner that is ok with the lifestyle, It would be like a fairytale come true, but would most likely end bittersweet, in my experience. Sometimes I wish there was a man with enough courage to date me, but he would he be the right man for me, in the long run and it could also be too emotionally draining to try to balance a relationship with work, etc. He would have to be a very confident man to be able to handle what I do, and that would be worth it to make time for someone with that quality, although I also value my independence and freedom, so as I said, would take a very special person to be able to handle dating an sp and although I have met some amazing people in my lifetime, I prefer to technically stay single and reserved for those who need me most. If I met Prince Charming who was equally interested in me I would end up no longer being an sp and that would be fine if his heart was true and sincere...so far that has not happened and I'm happy the way my life has unfolded thus far!

so true, luv2lickpussy, being strong in one-self is very important and having no expectations in the other person is always a good idea. Lol, @ bcpete I would most likely date someone I did not have that issue with, they would have to be happy being with me for the sake of being with me, if you love something, set it free, lol, I do believe we are not anyone else's keeper, what's meant to be will be, without definition...

Truuuue that to both statements...this man would have to be a uniquely open-minded individual and loves you for who you are cause trying to change you would not be you anymore.
"temet nosce" is latin meaning "know thyself", sorry being too matrix-ey

 

[sevenofnine]

Just curious but is there a difference between recreational sex, and making love.

Is there a difference in fucking some stranger and never seeing them again, as opposed to making love to the person you love time and time again.


It really is difficult I think getting involved with an sp.
But I think its more about, my feelings, I mean in a sense I have to be open to it. It has to be something I want,

And I think it takes a lot of personal confidence, or maybe just stupidity,
To get involved with someone emotionally who has so many physical intimate relationships

It takes a hell of a lot of inner sort of strength and confidence in who you are.
Or maybe just a hell of a lot of stupidity.

But then as we go through life, we do many things, that are just plain stupid but we really get off on them and spend a lot of time and money doing them,

If you can't laugh and enjoy, no matter how it turns out and take it all in stride

well.

 

[Banger77]

Just curious but is there a difference between recreational sex, and making love.

Is there a difference in fucking some stranger and never seeing them again, as opposed to making love to the person you love time and time again.

It really is difficult I think getting involved with an sp.
But I think its more about, my feelings, I mean in a sense I have to be open to it. It has to be something I want,

And I think it takes a lot of personal confidence, or maybe just stupidity,
To get involved with someone emotionally who has so many physical intimate relationships

It takes a hell of a lot of inner sort of strength and confidence in who you are.
Or maybe just a hell of a lot of stupidity.

But then as we go through life, we do many things, that are just plain stupid but we really get off on them and spend a lot of time and money doing them,

If you can't laugh and enjoy, no matter how it turns out and take it all in stride

well.

7of9, I think more indepth deeper feelings when making love to their SO. I have to say both a major inner sort of strength&confidence and some stupidity to be in a relationship with a SP. lol

 

[PlayfulAlex]

Haha...I'll have to go back and look for the thread where I suggested the site:

www.PoSPF.com

Plenty of SP Fish! ound:

 

[Ms. Yoko Anna]

Just curious but is there a difference between recreational sex, and making love.

Is there a difference in fucking some stranger and never seeing them again, as opposed to making love to the person you love time and time again.


It really is difficult I think getting involved with an sp.
But I think its more about, my feelings, I mean in a sense I have to be open to it. It has to be something I want,

And I think it takes a lot of personal confidence, or maybe just stupidity,
To get involved with someone emotionally who has so many physical intimate relationships

It takes a hell of a lot of inner sort of strength and confidence in who you are.
Or maybe just a hell of a lot of stupidity.

But then as we go through life, we do many things, that are just plain stupid but we really get off on them and spend a lot of time and money doing them,

If you can't laugh and enjoy, no matter how it turns out and take it all in stride

well.

I am not sure if it is the same thing, but I can say I am extremely comfortable about who I am.
I tend to think I am an awesome human with some wicked skills and some weaknesses.

I had a SO while I was working full time.
He was extremely comfortable with who he is, and perfectly fine with my business.
We actually decided together that I get into the business.
We had a mutual goal which required tons of money, and it just made sense so much in realistic and practical way that I become an escort.

We treated my job like any other job.
Sometime I was tired and bitch about the nature of the business, but mostly I enjoyed it.
I shared my feeling towards the job in both good time and bad time.
He handled it just so well.

Also, he had some fun sex with other girls, his coworker, some SPs, or my friends or whoever willing to have sex with him.
I had no problem with that either.
It was a bit of chore on my end to sexually fulfil his need by myself after long day of working, so I was glad that someone else was doing it for him.
But I knew that he won't leave me for someone else.
I was more than sexual muse to him, I was a life partner of him.
So I had no single issue that he have sex with others.

In fact, I was extremely affectionate with him, but did not really have sex, mainly because that was my job.
He understood, never nagged me for not fucking him or anything.
He played with himself, or go somewhere else to find his need filled.

It takes both parties to have absolute understanding of who you are.
It cannot be relative though. Once you value yourself in relationship with others (like I am cuter than her), you have a high risk of being insecure.

Also, fundamental trust is required.
Ladies will have to tell the guy that they are escorts, (guys have to tell their lady that they cannot be faithful for the rest of their life). Being open book about everything, and build the trust. Build the trust to the point that you don't really need to "report" everything but not concealing anything.

I must say some of the ladies I met through the business are simply "cool chicks".
It is so much fun to hang out with them.

Escorts are cool bunch as relationship materials.
I M H O.

 

[PlayfulAlex]

snip...If you don't want that conversation with ANY man, then I hope you are not selfish enough to just keep that little detail to yourself knowing full well that your SO has no idea.

Just to clarify, no that isn't what I meant...I mentioned earlier in the thread that dating and SPing did not go hand-in-hand for me. I will return to dating when my SPing days are behind me!

 

[PlayfulAlex]

snip...Knowing you as much as I can from posts on Perb, I think that when you do start looking, some lucky dude is going to win the lottery! :nod:

Thanks so much but I'd better not wait too long; you know how time flies when you're having fun.............. ound:

 

[Banger77]

I am not sure if it is the same thing, but I can say I am extremely comfortable about who I am.
I tend to think I am an awesome human with some wicked skills and some weaknesses.

I had a SO while I was working full time.
He was extremely comfortable with who he is, and perfectly fine with my business.
We actually decided together that I get into the business.
We had a mutual goal which required tons of money, and it just made sense so much in realistic and practical way that I become an escort.

We treated my job like any other job.
Sometime I was tired and bitch about the nature of the business, but mostly I enjoyed it.
I shared my feeling towards the job in both good time and bad time.
He handled it just so well.

Also, he had some fun sex with other girls, his coworker, some SPs, or my friends or whoever willing to have sex with him.
I had no problem with that either.
It was a bit of chore on my end to sexually fulfil his need by myself after long day of working, so I was glad that someone else was doing it for him.
But I knew that he won't leave me for someone else.
I was more than sexual muse to him, I was a life partner of him.
So I had no single issue that he have sex with others.

In fact, I was extremely affectionate with him, but did not really have sex, mainly because that was my job.
He understood, never nagged me for not fucking him or anything.
He played with himself, or go somewhere else to find his need filled.

It takes both parties to have absolute understanding of who you are.
It cannot be relative though. Once you value yourself in relationship with others (like I am cuter than her), you have a high risk of being insecure.

Also, fundamental trust is required.
Ladies will have to tell the guy that they are escorts, (guys have to tell their lady that they cannot be faithful for the rest of their life). Being open book about everything, and build the trust. Build the trust to the point that you don't really need to "report" everything but not concealing anything.

I must say some of the ladies I met through the business are simply "cool chicks".
It is so much fun to hang out with them.

Escorts are cool bunch as relationship materials.
I M H O.

Hi Yoko,

It sounds like your SO is in the past tense?
Are you still together, if not, did the break up have anything to do with you being an SP?

Thats what it sounds like to me too...past tense.

 

[sevenofnine]

I am not sure if it is the same thing, but I can say I am extremely comfortable about who I am.
I tend to think I am an awesome human with some wicked skills and some weaknesses.

I had a SO while I was working full time.
He was extremely comfortable with who he is, and perfectly fine with my business.
We actually decided together that I get into the business.
We had a mutual goal which required tons of money, and it just made sense so much in realistic and practical way that I become an escort.

We treated my job like any other job.
Sometime I was tired and bitch about the nature of the business, but mostly I enjoyed it.
I shared my feeling towards the job in both good time and bad time.
He handled it just so well.

Also, he had some fun sex with other girls, his coworker, some SPs, or my friends or whoever willing to have sex with him.
I had no problem with that either.
It was a bit of chore on my end to sexually fulfil his need by myself after long day of working, so I was glad that someone else was doing it for him.
But I knew that he won't leave me for someone else.
I was more than sexual muse to him, I was a life partner of him.
So I had no single issue that he have sex with others.

In fact, I was extremely affectionate with him, but did not really have sex, mainly because that was my job.
He understood, never nagged me for not fucking him or anything.
He played with himself, or go somewhere else to find his need filled.

It takes both parties to have absolute understanding of who you are.
It cannot be relative though. Once you value yourself in relationship with others (like I am cuter than her), you have a high risk of being insecure.

Also, fundamental trust is required.
Ladies will have to tell the guy that they are escorts, (guys have to tell their lady that they cannot be faithful for the rest of their life). Being open book about everything, and build the trust. Build the trust to the point that you don't really need to "report" everything but not concealing anything.

I must say some of the ladies I met through the business are simply "cool chicks".
It is so much fun to hang out with them.

Escorts are cool bunch as relationship materials.
I M H O.

I think its interesting in what you said.
In that, when your involved emotionally with an sp. The sex is not the most important thing.

Its there its part of it, but if you end up competing with all the other guys she has sex with or maybe critiquing yourself with other guys comparing yourself to other guys it just seems to be a down hill slope.
Its no way its going to work.

The emotional side the need to just be with each other and the trust you have in that, has to be first and for most. Sex happens or doesn't happen you have to be ok with the fact that your together,

 

[Jethro Bodine]

I CAN't wait to hear everyone's insight. I'm sure it will be fascinating.....

Okay, since you asked nicely, I'll date you.

 

[bmwdriver]

I know you're teasing me, but I'll indulge you Baby! YES, when I'm in a relationship, I'm cooking, massaging, cleaning and giving great bjs all day, doing whatever I can to make my man happy. If I commit myself to trying to develop and maintain a relationship I'm committed 100%. That being said, while I am currently single, I'm not available. I'm a full time student and I have you guys too, and my friends.... I don't feel that I can dedicate the time and effort required to nurture such a relationship right now. Besides, all you lovely charming gentlemen have so gallantly agreed to tend to all my physical needs, so I will be my own boyfriend for now... Take myself to dinner and a movie, get myself a dozen pink roses a week and buy my own chocolates. HOWEVER... If anything should change in the near future, I promise you will be the first to know!
Deal?

I have no doubt that you would be quite the girlfriend Cami. As for dating an sp, when I was younger I would have said no. Now, that I'm a bit wiser, I would say maybe. I mean, I would date an sp, but the question for me, is could I see the relationship lasting? Her being an sp would not, by itself, prevent me from dating her. Unlike some, I think that I would prefer to have met the sp as a client, before dating.

 

[Pacific Coast]

I haven't read this entire thread because its a long one. But to answer Cami's original question I could only date an SP casually. If I were in love with the lady it wouldn't work for me. When I'm in love I'm monogamous and it would hurt me too much that she wasn't so I would move on.

 

[Cami Parker]

That's so sweet... I love guys that aren't afraid to show their authentic feelings. Thanks for being real!!

I haven't read this entire thread because its a long one. But to answer Cami's original question I could only date an SP casually. If I were in love with the lady it wouldn't work for me. When I'm in love I'm monogamous and it would hurt me too much that she wasn't so I would move on.

 

[Cami Parker]

Depends on the person, and the chemistry, but certainly you wouldn't be completely written off because you're a member f perb....

Would an sp want to date the male members of perb?

 

[Cami Parker]

I don't really see it as a business, personally.... I mean, it is, but it's not since they say if you can do what you love and still managed to get income out of it you'll never work a day in your life. And I can only speak for myself, but I'm not necessarily selling sex... I mean, you can get laid anywhere for $100, right? In my personal opinion, people need companionship and affection and a real friend to talk to more than just sex.... Of course the sex is excellent too!!!! But I don't considder myself to be "in the business of selling sex"... I have a brain, I have a heart, I have opinions, I have a good sense of humor along with many other redeeming qualities that people seem to appreciate... After all, I'm a woman not just a hole, you know??

I'm sorry I'm so direct and meant no offense. I love women so much that they sense it and, women liking a challenge, dont seem tonlike me as much. I love sp's even more and have fallen stupidly, madly in love after just ONE session. However, is an active sp "dating" someone nothing more than polygamy? I mean I know you have to think of sp'ng as a business, but what exactly are you selling? Intimate, sexual, relations. Isn't it? Put it less romantically: COITUS, you are selling coitus nes pas? Now, everyone is as free to have as much coitus with as many people, paid or not, as they please, but if you wanna bang a bunch of guys at the same time that pay for that privilige and call the guy who gets to bang you for free AND gives you the foot massage and oh how was your day your "boyfriend", you are also free to do that but the validity of that relationship, based on the simple fact that you get to have "meaningless" sex with other men while at the same time puprport to have some kind of monogomous relationship is suspect. If I have a "girlfriend", love her, live with her, share a life with her and get to copulate with as many women as I like but call it my "job" that would be .....pretty swell. Oh no, I think I get it. Play on playette.

 

[Cami Parker]

Talk about a lady who gets it.... LOVE the alway brilliant insight!

This is a really interesting perspective. So the monogamy is suspect because the (numerous) penis (es) is (are) entering the (singular) vagina.

Whatever happened to that age-old excuse (delivered mostly by guys), "C'mon honey, that was only sex...I LOVE you..."

Thus, as long as she has other penises that are entering said vagina, even if they are work-related and give her limited amounts of personal pleasure (read: personal choice), he should enjoy the same/opposite right/privelege, ie. placing his penis into as many vaginas as he wishes (pay would be nice but not likely and thus not necessary)?

As I said in my earlier comments in this post, I so don't wish to ever have this conversation while 'dating'! ound:

 

[Cami Parker]

Awww Baby, I'm betting that you just don't give yourself enough credit....

Being single for a few yrs now, I should then be a shoe in. I get the feeling I've lost some sense in dating etc. I'm clueless now

 

[Cami Parker]

Agreed!!! :cheer2::cheer2::cheer2:

Honestly, It is really challenging to find a partner that is ok with the lifestyle, It would be like a fairytale come true, but would most likely end bittersweet, in my experience. Sometimes I wish there was a man with enough courage to date me, but he would he be the right man for me, in the long run and it could also be too emotionally draining to try to balance a relationship with work, etc. He would have to be a very confident man to be able to handle what I do, and that would be worth it to make time for someone with that quality, although I also value my independence and freedom, so as I said, would take a very special person to be able to handle dating an sp and although I have met some amazing people in my lifetime, I prefer to technically stay single and reserved for those who need me most. If I met Prince Charming who was equally interested in me I would end up no longer being an sp and that would be fine if his heart was true and sincere...so far that has not happened and I'm happy the way my life has unfolded thus far!

 

[Cami Parker]

So you weren't really dating... More like a booty call? Heehee ain't nothin wrong with that! LOL:clap2:

I have dated a SP in the past and in my opinion, it was only successful because we weren't romantic. We got together to have sex and that was pretty much it, save an odd movie or two. Once she started to move towards the relationship avenue, I ended it.