Woman 18 Years Younger than Me

[poorboyv6]

So, I ran into this woman on Dec 31, 2011. I ended up standing around her desk waiting to do a favour for some fucker who ended up wasting my time by giving me an unuseable report that had to be tossed because it was full of mistakes. I had a good talk with her and she said she enjoyed talking to me and to drop by anytime.

She's a very attractive brunette with a great figure, who probably stands my height or an inch or two taller, but likes to wear heels, so stands maybe three inches taller than me.

I didn't drop by her desk too much because I work in an uptight workplace where only 20% of the staff are female. In retrospect, it was a good idea because a lot of guys ended up hanging around to get a look at her, and rumour is she had to file a complaint because at least one guy was sniffing around too much.

One time I was looking for passengers to go flying with me around White Rock, so I emailed her and she never replied. The next time I saw her, she looked away and appeared uncomfortable.

I let more time pass. Whenever I had to go to the other side of the building and saw her, I'd wave or share a couple of sentences with her before moving on. Towards the end of 2012, I saw her profile on eharmony. She made it clear in her add she didn't want anything to do with a guy who was a heavy drinker, smoker or drug user and was looking for someone about 5 years older and close to 6 ft. I contacted her and said hi on eharmony and good luck.

She volunteers at a foster home for a few hours a week, and has a cat. At the time I had a cat, so we'd talk about our cats. When I found out she was not getting her contract renewed because the permanent employee was coming back from maternity leave, I gave her a bunch of suggestions on how to make it through unemployment. I also gave her a way to contact me and mentioned if she wanted to do something to fill some time in between searching for a job, I'd be happy to take her to the shooting range or golf driving range. She never took me up on the offer.

A few months pass, and I see her again. She has another year long contract at another branch, and works part time at the main branch, so I have to email her to contact her because I also transferred. I asked what she was up to, and if she wanted to go up for a flight around White Rock, and she said she's usually pretty busy, but to let her know anyway the next time I go up.

I let some time pass, and then told her when I was going next, and she said she was busy. I told her I'd let her when I go the next time because I have to go whether or not I have a passenger to keep my rating.

I asked her how her summer was going, and again she said she was busy travelling around to Whistler, downtown Vancouver and Seattle. We both used to ride horses and exercise regularly. She even likes the city I live in as that is where she now works.

She was very well raised, and I'd say quite a catch. She hasn't mentioned a boyfriend, so I think she's single.

I haven't asked her directly for a date. While she is happy to correspond with me and has lots in common, I think it is because she may have no one to talk to at work. She never contacts me first. I get the feeling the age and height difference is too much for her to be genuinely interested.

 

[BORKO]

So, I ran into this woman on Dec 31, 2011. I ended up standing around her desk waiting to do a favour for some fucker who ended up wasting my time by giving me an unuseable report that had to be tossed because it was full of mistakes. I had a good talk with her and she said she enjoyed talking to me and to drop by anytime.

She's a very attractive brunette with a great figure, who probably stands my height or an inch or two taller, but likes to wear heels, so stands maybe three inches taller than me.

I didn't drop by her desk too much because I work in an uptight workplace where only 20% of the staff are female. In retrospect, it was a good idea because a lot of guys ended up hanging around to get a look at her, and rumour is she had to file a complaint because at least one guy was sniffing around too much.

One time I was looking for passengers to go flying with me around White Rock, so I emailed her and she never replied. The next time I saw her, she looked away and appeared uncomfortable.

I let more time pass. Whenever I had to go to the other side of the building and saw her, I'd wave or share a couple of sentences with her before moving on. Towards the end of 2012, I saw her profile on eharmony. She made it clear in hear add she didn't want anything to do with a guy who was a heavy drinker, smoker or drug user and was looking for someone about 5 years older and close to 6 ft.

She volunteers at a foster home for a few hours a week, and has a cat. At the time I had a cat, so we'd talk about our cats. When I found out she was not getting her contract renewed because the permanent employee was coming back from maternity leave, I gave her a bunch of suggestions on how to make it through unemployment. I also gave her a way to contact me and mentioned if she wanted to do something to fill some time in between searching for a job, I'd be happy to take her to the shooting range or golf driving range. She never took me up on the offer.

A few months pass, and I see her again. She has another year long contract at another branch, and works part time at the main branch, so I have to email her to contact her because I also transferred. I asked what she was up to, and if she wanted to go up for a flight around White Rock, and she said she's usually pretty busy, but to let her know anyway the next time I go up.

I let some time pass, and then told her when I was going next, and she said she was busy. I told her I'd let her when I go the next time because I have to go whether or not I have a passenger to keep my rating.

I asked her how her summer was going, and again she said she was busy travelling around to Whistler, downtown Vancouver and Seattle. We both used to ride horses and exercise regularly. She even likes the city I live in as that is where she now works.

She was very well raised, and I'd say quite a catch. She hasn't mentioned a boyfriend, so I think she's single.

I haven't asked her directly for a date. While she is happy to correspond with me and have lots in common, I get the feeling the age and height difference is too much for her to be genuinely interested.

Maybe you will turn that feeling into knowing if you directly ask her for a date?

 

[87112]

18 years is a freaking lot in Canada and USA, although it could be zero if you win the Powerball next week. Sorry to be harsh, I don't see this working out , maybe in Eastern Europe like Moldova or Hungary that kind of age difference is ok.

 

[normisanas]

18 years is a freaking lot in Canada and USA, although it could be zero if you win the Powerball next week. Sorry to be harsh, I don't see this working out , maybe in Eastern Europe like Moldova or Hungary that kind of age difference is ok.

19 years diff is working out for me just fine.

 

[bcneil]

From what you wrote..
I'd say she is a nice friendly lady, which could be part of her job? Is she a receptionist or something similar?
But she is not really interested in dating you.

 

[normisanas]

So, I ran into this woman on Dec 31, 2011. I ended up standing around her desk waiting to do a favour for some fucker who ended up wasting my time by giving me an unuseable report that had to be tossed because it was full of mistakes. I had a good talk with her and she said she enjoyed talking to me and to drop by anytime.

She's a very attractive brunette with a great figure, who probably stands my height or an inch or two taller, but likes to wear heels, so stands maybe three inches taller than me.

I didn't drop by her desk too much because I work in an uptight workplace where only 20% of the staff are female. In retrospect, it was a good idea because a lot of guys ended up hanging around to get a look at her, and rumour is she had to file a complaint because at least one guy was sniffing around too much.

One time I was looking for passengers to go flying with me around White Rock, so I emailed her and she never replied. The next time I saw her, she looked away and appeared uncomfortable.

I let more time pass. Whenever I had to go to the other side of the building and saw her, I'd wave or share a couple of sentences with her before moving on. Towards the end of 2012, I saw her profile on eharmony. She made it clear in her add she didn't want anything to do with a guy who was a heavy drinker, smoker or drug user and was looking for someone about 5 years older and close to 6 ft. I contacted her and said hi on eharmony and good luck.

She volunteers at a foster home for a few hours a week, and has a cat. At the time I had a cat, so we'd talk about our cats. When I found out she was not getting her contract renewed because the permanent employee was coming back from maternity leave, I gave her a bunch of suggestions on how to make it through unemployment. I also gave her a way to contact me and mentioned if she wanted to do something to fill some time in between searching for a job, I'd be happy to take her to the shooting range or golf driving range. She never took me up on the offer.

A few months pass, and I see her again. She has another year long contract at another branch, and works part time at the main branch, so I have to email her to contact her because I also transferred. I asked what she was up to, and if she wanted to go up for a flight around White Rock, and she said she's usually pretty busy, but to let her know anyway the next time I go up.

I let some time pass, and then told her when I was going next, and she said she was busy. I told her I'd let her when I go the next time because I have to go whether or not I have a passenger to keep my rating.

I asked her how her summer was going, and again she said she was busy travelling around to Whistler, downtown Vancouver and Seattle. We both used to ride horses and exercise regularly. She even likes the city I live in as that is where she now works.

She was very well raised, and I'd say quite a catch. She hasn't mentioned a boyfriend, so I think she's single.

I haven't asked her directly for a date. While she is happy to correspond with me and has lots in common, I think it is because she may have no one to talk to at work. She never contacts me first. I get the feeling the age and height difference is too much for her to be genuinely interested.

I doubt it very much, but you should ask her anyways.

Here's why I doubt it:
1) you said a lot of guys are always hanging around her, and you've been unable to resist the temptation to make passes at her. That's usually a no-go with hot girls because she'll think you're just like all the others. If you never made a pass at her or paid her much attention, you would've had a pretty good chance.

2) She turned you down each and every time, always one excuse or another.

3) You email her to go flying to White Rock. She never replies.

4) You contact her on E-Harmony, the biggest hint you've made, but she doesn't bite. That means she definitely is not interested.

5) You won't be able to salvage this by constantly making passes at her. In fact, you'll kill any remote possibility you might have left. And if you really want to kill it completely, become her friend.

Here's what you should do if you want to have any chance in the future:
1) stop talking to her completely. Acknowledge her presence like you would an ugly girl at your work, ie: just say "hi" and walk right on by.
2) don't make any more passes.
3) don't look at her... she knows you're looking. Don't look.
4) forget about her until you've basically forgotten about her, it will be apparent in your manner but don't focus on how you will appear to her.
5) flirt with other girls a lot in front of her, and don't give her the time of day. Be sure the girls flirt back, otherwise don't do it.
6) if what you say is true, that she has nobody to talk with at work, rejecting her is your best bet because the isolation will make her miss you.

 

[kauffman]

I doubt it very much, but you should ask her anyways.

Here's why I doubt it:
1) you said a lot of guys are always hanging around her, and you've been unable to resist the temptation to make passes at her. That's usually a no-go with hot girls because she'll think you're just like all the others. If you never made a pass at her or paid her much attention, you would've had a pretty good chance.

2) She turned you down each and every time, always one excuse or another.

3) You email her to go flying to White Rock. She never replies.

4) You contact her on E-Harmony, the biggest hint you've made, but she doesn't bite. That means she definitely is not interested.

5) You won't be able to salvage this by constantly making passes at her. In fact, you'll kill any remote possibility you might have left. And if you really want to kill it completely, become her friend.

Here's what you should do if you want to have any chance in the future:
1) stop talking to her completely. Acknowledge her presence like you would an ugly girl at your work, ie: just say "hi" and walk right on by.
2) don't make any more passes.
3) don't look at her... she knows you're looking. Don't look.
4) forget about her until you've basically forgotten about her, it will be apparent in your manner but don't focus on how you will appear to her.
5) flirt with other girls a lot in front of her, and don't give her the time of day. Be sure the girls flirt back, otherwise don't do it.
6) if what you say is true, that she has nobody to talk with at work, rejecting her is your best bet because the isolation will make her miss you.

how exactly is ignoring her rejecting her and making obvious (and ridiclously immature i might ad) attempts to get her attention by flirting with women while ignoring her going to make someone who was never interested in this guy in the first place miss him? Sorry that sentence was written so poorly.

 

[Smilf]

OMG you guys .. sheesh just ask her out and if she says no, she says no and move on. There's nothing worse than people who play games while attempting to date or whatever. Do you like when ladies play games when you're paying them for it? No you don't! Well same thing applies in dating.

 

[BORKO]

how exactly is ignoring her rejecting her and making obvious (and ridiclously immature i might ad) attempts to get her attention by flirting with women while ignoring her going to make someone who was never interested in this guy in the first place miss him? Sorry that sentence was written so poorly.

I'd assume it's from all that PUA/Game stuff.

 

[badbadboy]

poorboy this is the wrong place to look for dating advice. From what everything you have said I think its pretty clear that she is not into you and may even be creeped out by your continual advances.

Find a nice SP and carry on.

 

[poorboyv6]

Thanks for the input from everyone.

Sometimes the line between being realistic and negative can be foggy for me. I just wanted to confirm my suspicions were correct and that I wasn't being too negative about the whole thing.

I'm sure things will work out for her. She's got a lot going for her.

 

[vancity_cowboy]

it's been my experience that there's two types of non-escort heterosexual women in this world:

those that don't mind going out with a man 18 or more years older than them, and those that draw the line somewhere between the 5 - 10 year mark

they are pretty much hard-wired that way and there ain't a lot of grey area in between (no pun intended )

what you have to do first is find out which of the two she is. however, if you can't get close enough to her to outright ask her, i think you have the answer to that question

 

[VanessaofBC]

Sorry after reading what I read the only thing I could think was STOP!

Stop contacting her. You gave too many different scenarios to which she is NOT receptive I am sorry.

Here's what you should do if you want to have any chance in the future:
1) stop talking to her completely. Acknowledge her presence like you would an ugly girl at your work, ie: just say "hi" and walk right on by.
2) don't make any more passes.
3) don't look at her... she knows you're looking. Don't look.
4) forget about her until you've basically forgotten about her, it will be apparent in your manner but don't focus on how you will appear to her.
5) flirt with other girls a lot in front of her, and don't give her the time of day. Be sure the girls flirt back, otherwise don't do it.
6) if what you say is true, that she has nobody to talk with at work, rejecting her is your best bet because the isolation will make her miss you.

I think this is good advice to. If she see others wanting him, it may make her realize that SHE actually wants him. Makes sense to me.

 

[grusse]

Good afternoon, old sports.

I realized something many years ago. It is not men who choose their women; rather, it is the women who choose their men.

A man can woo and court a woman but if she does not want him and shows no interest in him, then he is done, old sports. He can do no more. It is the woman who casts the final vote.

What I have noticed, old sports, is that a woman will always notice and show interest in a man who has a strong personality, a man who is not afraid to speak his mind on various subjects and topics, a man who does not care what others think of his views. Of course, old sprots, this man still needs to be respectful of others around him but he is not afraid to speak his mind for fear of ostracization. He is not there to win a popularity contest, old sports.

A few years ago a much younger and very attractive lady at work always gave me flirtatious little hugs and even called me "pumpkin" when she gave me a hug from behind and I must admit I was flattered. Yes, there is an age difference between the two of us and we both share the same height (5' 7"). The reason she was drawn to me is because I am very opinionated on many matters and very outspoken. It did not hurt I dress far better than my colleagues. I think she was drawn to my forceful nature. She is not drawn to Clark Kent, if you catch my drift; meek and mild doesn't do it for her, old sports.

Good day, old sports.

perhaps she was drawn in by your unassuming modesty....old sport

 

[VanessaofBC]

Good afternoon, old sport.

I failed to mention I am quite immodest and borderline arrogant, as well; I also possess a snarky wit and take no nonsense from anyone including those above me. I say what I need to say. I take no shame in that.

............................

 

[grusse]

Good afternoon, old sport.

I failed to mention I am quite immodest and borderline arrogant, as well; I also possess a snarky wit and take no nonsense from anyone including those above me. I say what I need to say. I take no shame in that.

well said,old sport.

maybe one day we will be treated to examples of your wit?

 

[juniper]

Re Jay's reply: He is right on the mark. Metro men will want to disagree but, nonetheless, it's the men with "cohones", masculine men, independent men, to whom almost all women are drawn in spite of what they (women) say in honour of socio/political correctness. They (women) can't help themselves. In short, women are drawn to power. Make no mistake. And that's as it should be.

 

[BORKO]

Re Jay's reply: He is right on the mark. Metro men will want to disagree but, nonetheless, it's the men with "cohones", masculine men, independent men, to whom almost all women are drawn in spite of what they (women) say in honour of socio/political correctness. They (women) can't help themselves. In short, women are drawn to power. Make no mistake. And that's as it should be.

I think there is a fine line between being an "alpha male" and just being an asshole, and many men that try to be one and end up the other.

 

[Caramel]

To the OP, you've already asked her enough times both within and outside of company communications to get nailed with harassment or stalking.
If you piss her off, she can ruin your life.
Walk away dude.

totally agree, she has said no so many times, your post also gave me anxiety and I am a woman...

 

[New]

I doubt it very much, but you should ask her anyways.

Here's why I doubt it:
1) you said a lot of guys are always hanging around her, and you've been unable to resist the temptation to make passes at her. That's usually a no-go with hot girls because she'll think you're just like all the others. If you never made a pass at her or paid her much attention, you would've had a pretty good chance.

2) She turned you down each and every time, always one excuse or another.

3) You email her to go flying to White Rock. She never replies.

4) You contact her on E-Harmony, the biggest hint you've made, but she doesn't bite. That means she definitely is not interested.

5) You won't be able to salvage this by constantly making passes at her. In fact, you'll kill any remote possibility you might have left. And if you really want to kill it completely, become her friend.

Here's what you should do if you want to have any chance in the future:
1) stop talking to her completely. Acknowledge her presence like you would an ugly girl at your work, ie: just say "hi" and walk right on by.
2) don't make any more passes.
3) don't look at her... she knows you're looking. Don't look.
4) forget about her until you've basically forgotten about her, it will be apparent in your manner but don't focus on how you will appear to her.
5) flirt with other girls a lot in front of her, and don't give her the time of day. Be sure the girls flirt back, otherwise don't do it.
6) if what you say is true, that she has nobody to talk with at work, rejecting her is your best bet because the isolation will make her miss you.

From what I read she doesn't seem interested at all. Every single offers been ignored or rejected, and if she was atleast interested she would of counter offered. Girls know what they want and they know everything, they just pretend to be stupid. I'll have to completely agree with normisanas as his way is the challenge approach, she'll start wondering why your ignoring her. Or why you stop inviting her or even stop talking to her. In the end you'll be at the back of her mind and it will drive her nuts as to why you are cold towards her. That's my reasoning as to why I would follow this.

If not then the simplest way is to just ask her out if she declines forget about her because you'll just end up in the friend zone or worse, you waste even more of your time.