Massage Adagio

why is it so fucking complicated,

sevenofnine

Active member
Nov 21, 2008
2,016
9
38
ok
first there is a guy,
who thinks a sp is just there for him to use abuse and trash,
when he is done with her,

maybe a little strong,
but there are guys that fit into this catagory,
guys that don't even know it and they fit into this catagory,

and i find it actually hard to blame a guy who falls into this catagory,
the price is expensive,
and the ladies sort of set themselves up for this
i wish at times i was more like this guy,


because having feelings and caring for your sp, is actually quite a bit more expensive,

and then there are guys like me, on the other end of the scale,
worry and wonder and care about there sp;s,.
ask them what they like there preferences are, not what is on their menue but what they like to do.

we spend time and money on suppers multiple hour sessions, when were older and mutliply hours are mostly filled with talk and drinks and long fore play.
instead of just wam bam thank you mam,
and msog.
if we can,

i wrote a thread once, saying i did everything wrong in this hobby,
such as loyalty to an sp,
having strong feelings for an sp, maybe even love,
bad time managment wasting my time talking,

most guys i think fall into the middle somewhere,

and i would think most sp;'s would like there guys to be some where in the middle ground somewhere to,

the fact of the matter is,
some guys are just wired differently,
i want to be that guy, who just uses that sp and is done with her,
because im married i don't want a relationship,
i spend all this money on my sp, and care and worry about her,
but some sob pays less, and gets more,
simply because he is more aggressive, and doesn't give a shit,

i give a shit, i worry about her i dont know why because i paid, and when its over its over, there is nothign special between us.
even though we say there is, is there,
when i run out of money its over, when i walk out the door its over, so why do i worry about her,

she sees me, just like she sees the s.o.b.

i have wondered about this, and even taken some flak,
am i just a sucker a fool,
it doesnt matter,
because its what i want,
its the way im wired,
its the way i see people.

im seeing a lady this friday off the clock,
she asked to see me professionallly, twice before, i declined,
i used to write lots on another board, she liked the way i wrote, and asked to see me,
i was into some one else, still am,
but she has asked to meet me several times, even though she is retired,
so were meeting for drinks, on friday,

another lady wants to see me, as well, off the clock,

if i was an s.o.b. i would milk it for all its worth,
off the clock i would still try to get into her panties,
but i thought and worried about it,

what if they want to do more then just have coffee or some drinks,

and for fuck sakes, my first impression is to say no,
because i don't want a relationship,
im married with a couple of kids, im not leaving that,


why is it so fucking complicated,
 

Holly Taylor

New member
May 27, 2007
405
9
0
Vancouver
I'm sorry, but...

I'm very sorry that right now you are going through a rough patch emotionally.

I can definitely understand how you would develop emotional attachment to the lady you are seeing- it's very normal. After all, you are spending a lot of time talking, and spending intimate time together. Don't feel bad about yourself for this. It's actually very nice to know that you are so thoughtful and thinking about her well-being.

However, I take issue with the following comment:

ok
first there is a guy,
who thinks a sp is just there for him to use abuse and trash,
when he is done with her,

maybe a little strong,
but there are guys that fit into this catagory,
guys that don't even know it and they fit into this catagory,

and i find it actually hard to blame a guy who falls into this catagory,
the price is expensive,
and the ladies sort of set themselves up for this
i wish at times i was more like this guy,
No escort sets herself up for abuse, whether by virtue of charging a high rate, or by virtue of being an escort. There is no excuse for being violent to an escort, and it is not acceptable to claim that a lady "sets herself up for it."

This is akin to blaming the victim, and I wanted you to know that even if you didn't mean it that way, that's how it came across (at least, to me), and I thought it was inappropriate.

I wish you all the best in your current situation, and I hope you feel better soon.
 

Hoe_watch

New member
Dec 30, 2008
67
0
0
so wait a sec here, let me see if I got this straight.

you've been seeing these ladies for awhile now, I gather. and now they want to spend time with you in their free time as well? and you're whining about it?! what is your secret?!



lol! reminds me of when I was much younger slimmer and prettier, and I told my mama about all my girl troubles too many of em chasing me at once, "what am I gonna do?!" she told me "I dunno....enjoy?"

seems to me that a married man would do well, to get in, do his stuff and get out. why tarry on the edge and risk getting noticed any longer than need be??
 

chris2008

New member
Aug 25, 2008
130
1
0
I'm going to make a generalized comment without not really knowing you but it sounds like what you are looking for is emotional cheating.
Don't know where the breakdown between your wife and you is but pooning is for the most part about the physical aspect.

Whatever you are looking for, you will not find it pooning. You should probably go on Madisons?? *that website that has married peolple cheating with each other, not that I am condoning what you are doing here, we all have our secrets*

Regardless, you should probably talk to a psychologist regarding your intimacy issues.

Good luck.
 

Holly Taylor

New member
May 27, 2007
405
9
0
Vancouver
pooning is for the most part about the physical aspect.
Actually, I think it's different for everybody.

I've had 5 hour long appointments where the gentleman just wanted to talk to me, and there was no sexual contact at all.

Also, in multi-hour appointments, most clients seem to enjoy both the physical aspect and the intellectual/emotional aspect.

However, you are mostly right when it comes to the 1 hour appointments (there simply isn't much time to move beyond the physical, and for people who are only looking for a sexual encounter, the 1 hour appointment is probably best).
 

chris2008

New member
Aug 25, 2008
130
1
0
Good point, do these tend to be older gentleman that are in it for the intellectual/emotional aspect?

Actually, I think it's different for everybody.

I've had 5 hour long appointments where the gentleman just wanted to talk to me, and there was no sexual contact at all.

Also, in multi-hour appointments, most clients seem to enjoy both the physical aspect and the intellectual/emotional aspect.

However, you are mostly right when it comes to the 1 hour appointments (there simply isn't much time to move beyond the physical, and for people who are only looking for a sexual encounter, the 1 hour appointment is probably best).
 

Holly Taylor

New member
May 27, 2007
405
9
0
Vancouver
Good point, do these tend to be older gentleman that are in it for the intellectual/emotional aspect?
No, actually.

Speaking for myself, it seems that some people simply like a short, sexual encounter, and other like a longer, more personal encounter. There's no "typical age" or anything like that for the longer appointments.

In fact, my very first overnight (12 hours) appointment was booked by a gentleman in his mid-20s.

The average age of my clientele is anywhere from 25 to 60. People of all ages book long appointments, and people of all ages book short appointments.
 

bigguy

Member
Sep 28, 2002
549
2
18
vancouver, b.c., canada
Yo LAG

I do hope you had your tongue firmly planted in your cheek when you talk about being "deep"!

When you talk about POUNDING senseless . . . ughhh, I give up!!! I guess there's still room for cavemen and their club.

bigguy
 

TheGuy

Banned
Jul 26, 2003
1,184
7
0
Vancouver
I think many escorts refuse to get emotionally involved because it is difficult work for them and if they brought their emotions into the work it may become impossible.

The other issue is that they are being paid to be nice - like waitresses - and some guys mistake being nice for real emotion.

Being an emotional and caring person in this world will always leave you open to being hurt. That is the risk. The reward is that at times you will make a true connection and other will never feel. Sometimes when we care for others we feel they should care for us in return but nobody has that obligation. When we don't get rewarded for our feelings that can hurt.

Accept the good with the bad and you will feel better about caring for others.
 
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Stoo

Member
Apr 5, 2004
67
1
8
Far, far away... well Ontario
7of9, I am only an occasional visitor to Perb, but spend a lot of time on Terb. I have found myself in a very similar situation and it has worked out fine.

There was a favorite SP in Kitchener Waterloo, who only worked for about 6 months. I never saw her during that time... Just never got around to it.

Sometime after she retired (she got too emotionally involved in her craft and it was causing her great stress) she reinvented herself on Terb, keeping her identity a secret, but we all knew she was a provider. Somewhere along the way, we started to chat via PM, then email, then in person, over dinner. And that was it.

Before long, I ended up at her place. I insisted on paying her for her time, but she declined to accept the payment. After that, we chatted more, and it was clear that we were very fond of each other, but I am much older and we want different things in our lives at this point, so we knew a real "relationship" wasn't going to work.

So it became "professional" again. I see her regularly, but not frequently, perhaps every three or four weeks. We have dinner out, or I bring something, then spend two or three hours romping about at her place. And I pay her... admittedly the rate is a little vague, but whatever the amount, it works for both of us.

This has been going on for a couple of years I think now. I bought her a little Christmas present, she gave me a card. I think the word to describe it best is it's "nice". Uncomplicated. We talk, eat, and have great sex. She has boyfriends and I have a serious girlfriend.

I don't know what you call this sort of thing, but it works and it's great.

As an aside, you mention how some guys are just "wired" differently, and you are so right. Someone very close to me was recently punched by her (ex) b/f and I have encouraged her to go to the police, but she is afraid to and lives in some fear of this asshole. I can't imagine ANY circumstances where I would ever hit a woman (well, I suppose if she was coming after me with an ax!) but dicks like him are out there who consider women to be their "possessions" to use and abuse as they see fit. There are guys on Terb that I think perhaps fall into this category and I imagine they're here too unfortunately...
 

sevenofnine

Active member
Nov 21, 2008
2,016
9
38
first of all, when i said use abuse and then trash
i really didn't mean physical abuse

but i guess it can come close to that, depending on your denintion and what your limits are,

i have listened to my sp, read lots on the subject, and listened and talked to when i don't know but alot of sps.

there comments like those guys that sticks thier tongue in my mouth and a finger in my pussy pretty much before we say hello,

complaints about rough sex, rough hands and treatmeant in general,

no talking no foreplay, no getting to know each other,

guys comments like pound the shit out of her,
she really takes a a pounding, fuck facing her, until she gags, or amazaed when she doesn't

you tell me a lady likes to be treated like that,

and my comments were a lady sets her self up for stuff like that,
is more or less the way this hobby is set up,

talking takes time rommance takes time, and well that becomes expensive,

and why bother the feelings aren't geniune are they,
you can spend a fortune gently carressing a lady whishper in her ear, slowing seducing her, with candle light and wine and fine dinnning,
she looks at her watch three hours are up,

and next day you read some ones reveiw of how they pounded away on her, for a quick hour with msog, and he goes wow,
definatly not a clock watcher, i went over my time
the lady sends back great fantastic time,
love you babe,

it seems to me to bother caring for a girl is a waste of time, and worry about her is generally a waste of time, and money

just my thoughts,
but its the way i am in not going to change,

and as far as seeing some ladies off the clock,

no i havent seen them professionally,
two ladies are emailing me wanting to see me socially,
one for a while, i was quite busy seeing some one else,
never felt the need to see someone else.

she is retired now but still wants to get together, were going to friday,
another lady, we met in chat briefly,
she asked to see me, i politely declined, saying i usually see someone,

latter she just started saying lets get together, socially ,


but it means a relationship, coffee drinks whatever, it goes,
im married i don't want a relationship,

these ladies both know im married, have kids,
both of them i think do have there own kids.
one is way to young for me, to see romanticlly or socially,

i chose to do this because im married didn't want any complications, any entanglements,

but yet i act with every session i have, like im seducing her, like i have to win her over, and enjoy it i do, its fun its great,
taking my time trying to rommance the lady i see,

but yet walk away wondering at times what the fuck am i doing,

now i have two ladies who want to see me socially, and shit, im scared to, because that would mean a relationship,

how did it get so complicated,
 

susi

Sassy Strumpette
Supporting Member
Jun 27, 2008
1,501
397
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@the Meat Market!!!lol
friends with benefits!....i like seduction, i like being intimate with clients, i don't hold back my emotions and have long and loving friendships with some of my guys. some as long as 18 years...i guess 19 years now...

that's not to say i don't like a good hard pounding!rough sex and animal like behavior can be very liberating!fucking for the sake of fucking!raw...dirty...sometimes i do the craziest shit...and just am the "town slut":p

the point being both ways have their place and appeal. sometimes it's good to be intimate...other times it's fun to just go animal!!

part of what is wrong in the world today is people fear of feeling. feeling, whether pain/pleasure or good/bad, defines us as people. we have all become so reluctant to share and feel with each other we have difficulty when emotions overwhelm us. i say embrace it!

these women know you are attached and as former sp's will understand and respect confidentiality. and if you are unsure about their assured discretion as it were, set up some safety measures and boundaries to ensure your privacy.

friends with benefits can be a great experience!it doesn't have to be complicated.

love susieXXXO
 

oppai

ilikeasianswithbigtitties
Oct 6, 2002
1,160
9
38
As you said, some people are wired differently. I think I fall along the same lines as you, except that I am not in a relationship. I have also seen girls "off the clock" and have even tried out a relationship.

Like you I feel emotional attachments to certain SP's that I am fond of. But I leave it at that.

Think about how you would feel if you did take advantage of the situation, I don't think you would be happy with yourself and I think the doubt or insecurities or whatever it is that is currently bothering you would become more so and you would become worse for it.

I would say something is lacking either from your marriage or other relationships that you have. There is probably some loneliness stemming from somewhere OR a desire to be the hero (take care of the less fortunate, injured, etc etc) that is giving you this instinct to feel strongly towards SP's without wanting a relationship.

I think a lot of us do this because we know there is an non-permanence to it. As men I think we are hardwired to fear commitment. Some more than others but in nature it is also most often the case with males of the species. We want to pass along our seed and move along. Over time that has lessened and we have become more commitment based due to religion, societal norms etc etc. With an SP we are able to be ourselves and let our guard down because at any time we can back off and switch to someone else without any repercussions.

You sound like a good guy who is obviously conscientious, caring and down to earth. Asides from cheating on your wife I don't think anyone could really fault you for your thoughts and feelings. I would stick to your game plan and if you feel bad about that maybe take a step back from the hobby for awhile. I think you would be worse if you "became a dick".

Best of luck,

Oppaaaaai
 

vidwindow

New member
Jul 1, 2008
195
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0
Passion

I fall passionately in love with each sp I spend an hour with. I embrace that time for all its worth, and for what it is: a passing moment in both our lives. Its like that girl in an elevator, or on the bus, or at Safeway who with a certain tilt of her head, a moment of beauty in her eyes, or a flash of a smile briefly touches my heart. All the world is in that moment.
Doesn't mean we will have a relationship or will pursue any kind of connection. Its fantasy. But it is these moments that comprise our lives.
Enjoy your time with an SP. Embrace that moment, express yourself passionately, love life and move on.

Vid :)
 
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HeMadeMeDoIt

New member
Feb 12, 2004
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Grow a pair you pathetic wimp! That was the saddest worthless puppy dog diatrible I've ever heard. You want romance and "getting to know her" bullshit go get a girlfriend and make sure you pound the shit out of her too, they also expect it.

Now i'll go puke!
 

HeMadeMeDoIt

New member
Feb 12, 2004
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As I said, I imagine you have them "here" too... :rolleyes:
Its ok he's allowed to be sensitive.

Sevenofnine here's a
]
 
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