One thing I noticed about you is that you have a very compassionate heart towards sex workers, and that's understandable because of personal relationships you've had with them, and the work you do with helping find missing women.
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When Being Reviewed is NOT a Choice
- Thread starter escapefromstress
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Warl0ck
Instincts work and you should listen to them but they aren't fool proof. Serena Abbotsway was interviewed on a Pickton documentary and told a reporter she wasn't worried because she listened to her 6th sense. Sadly, that woman was found at the farm.
I have compassion towards people in general. Having a partner and taking part in her profession opened my eyes to many things & broke down many of my own stereotypes. I came to understand I wasn't quite as open minded as I thought I was. Unfortunately I'm all too aware of the very ugly side of this industry and that side goes hand in hand with missing women (and people). Nothing takes away my breath like talking to a mother whose daughter is missing. I think the most fitting quote I ever saw about missing women was from Criminal Minds "To Hell and Back". It was the TV portrayal of the Pickton farm. The main character is a former US army sergeant seeking his sister (based on a real life person too). He comments to a cop "bad news stops us for awhile but then you move on. Hope is paralyzing". I think it sums up how families feel when their sons and daughters go missing. Monsters do live among us. It's only when you can really see them you realize holy fuck.
i've been a member/contributor to this board for over a decade. It has been an invaluable source of information. Perb isn't perfect by any stretch but is definitely the best source of information we have available. I've written both lengthy reviews and other shorter less detailed ones as well. I guess it really depends on my mood and how much effort I wanted to put in the review. I read both types of reviews and don't have any disdain for either. I appreciate any review if it gives the pooner more info to make a decision to see that sp.
I personally don't agree with the DNR but i understand it's availability to paid advertisers on this forum. This site is for PROFIT. They make money getting sp's to sign up. If they didn't offer benefits to the paid advertisers then PERB wouldn't make any money and this site would not exsist. The paid advertisers do have a choice if they want to be reviewed or not. As much as internet free speech is out there it's not in a private for profit site like Perb.
Nevertheless I am a fan of this place and will continue to contriubte when I can.
I personally don't agree with the DNR but i understand it's availability to paid advertisers on this forum. This site is for PROFIT. They make money getting sp's to sign up. If they didn't offer benefits to the paid advertisers then PERB wouldn't make any money and this site would not exsist. The paid advertisers do have a choice if they want to be reviewed or not. As much as internet free speech is out there it's not in a private for profit site like Perb.
Nevertheless I am a fan of this place and will continue to contriubte when I can.
DNR is not for profit on PERB. SPs can request it even if they don't advertise.
There are different free speech limitations (such as, only advertisers can respond to reviews). But not this.
This is true. I had a review pulled by Mods since the SP's ad on Erslist said DNR and she has never advertised here.
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Warl0ck
Oh I'm not saying I'm against role playing or fantasy. If a woman can provide that, all the power too her. What I'm saying is for a percentage of the customer base they take the act too literally. It's no secret there are a fair number of men out there who become too attached to their SP's and when she refuses them service they're suddenly angry at her & may lash out in a review. Recall a month or so ago a pooner on here posted his regular SP just cut him off. The thread got a dozen posts or so & there was very little "maybe you stepped over a boundary bud". It was all about what she did. Had he written a review it may have become nasty. As a species, males often get their wires crossed when a woman is friendly to them. So if the waitress smiles, flirts a bit, etc, the male sometimes thinks "she's into me". Escorts face that reality too. They're job is to give the male a sexual fantasy. It's the males job to understand it's only a fantasy & not start thinking "she likes me". Isn't that what "resting bitch face" is about? It's that hard look women get solely to push away male attention. Same reason for sunglasses. Look at a guy and he might start approaching you and hitting on you. We cross our wires, we get let go by an SP and out comes the bad review because we're emotionally upset (and we should not be)
Personally I like the dual rating system. I see a real benefit to the industry if women could rate males. It needs not to be personal, just questions of "was he respectful" "did he negotiate" etc. Nothing about body size, dick size, performance, etc should be shared. And it's beneficial to the pooner. If "Lance Alot" is a respected pooner well his value increases because SP's want regular respectful clients. And that respect just might give you certain benefits others don't get. Apparently Uber uses the same style system but I've never used Uber. Dual rating seems to be part of the new sharing economy. As a techie guy I find it fascinating. It's a quiet way of forcing people to be a little more respectful of each other and god knows we need that.
An SP started a mutual review AirBnB style here years ago.
Turned out there were a whole lota Butt Hurt individuals, mostly guys that couldn't take the "opinions", so that idea got nuked pretty quick.
My bet, its not gonna happen.
It wouldn't bother me one bit if we had mutual reviewing process and I'm into self improvement so any feedback from an acknowledged professional is good in my book. Maybe the mutual reviews could assist with the references required? I don't know, that's a thought in process for me.
Turned out there were a whole lota Butt Hurt individuals, mostly guys that couldn't take the "opinions", so that idea got nuked pretty quick.
My bet, its not gonna happen.
It wouldn't bother me one bit if we had mutual reviewing process and I'm into self improvement so any feedback from an acknowledged professional is good in my book. Maybe the mutual reviews could assist with the references required? I don't know, that's a thought in process for me.
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Warl0ck
No, it's probably not going to happen. It would take a woman with some real fortitude but it's possible she could pull it off. As the idea takes hold elsewhere it might find some fruition in this industry. There will always be the butt hurt types who won't accept it, but they're not her clientele. Just like a guy who likes cheap whiskey or cheap beer will never pay for a craft product. She starts an ecosystem like that & her mutual reviewing system might work with other women. Suddenly you've got an entirely new ecosystem which is beneficial to both women and men.
The results of a poll of clients' votes, for or against reviews, & for or against allowing a DNR policy, might be enlightening.
Ok, that's where my line is. Warlock, name names or can the unfounded accusations. PERB has NEVER tolerated that kind of crap and anyone trying it has been banned permanently. Review boards are by no means perfect, but when you post blatant falsehoods, that isn't going to fly here either.
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Warl0ck
Warl0ck didn't name Perb specifically.
I can testify to the fact that it does happen on other boards, and I know that in the distant past it has happened here on perb. I could name names but I won't.
I'm glad perb takes a strong stand on this issue and doesn't tolerate it.
Thanks Warlock and EFS, we are working hard to keep PERB a positive, open and friendly place, if these kind of scum are here, I'd like to know so we can cull them from the herd.
We've come a long way since the old days, haven't we?
It used to be "the wild, wild west" here on perb, and sometimes terb was even worse.
Admins, Mods and members have all learned a lot about posting responsibly on public forums.
Agreed, that is one of the best features around here that the community is able to warn others of rip offs, pimps and the like.
You make it sound like it was the pooner's who instigated this whole GFE, Social Time thing and pushing the boundaries rather than the provider's who may be offering more which may make them more exclusive to pooners who enjoy multiple hour engagements. Seems to me every higher end SP with a website also has targeted pricing for social engagements or as a package over a multi hour date in which they might do the Grouse Grind or the may walk hand in hand in Stanley Park.
On the GFE sex side which came first (question for some of the "experienced SP's" not specifically you) allowing DATY or BBBJ? I seem to recall reading that DATY was prevalent while CBJ ruled the day. Usually and I am speaking 10 years ago that SP's would default to BBBJ only if you were a regular client. There was a tipping point maybe a decade ago when the GFE thing became a competitive advantage of one SP over another. They all soon jumped on board or had a non GFE package costing less than the full GFE package.
Whether we like it or not, the YMMV quotient does play a part in any date. This past year, I have visited SP's who didn't get the most glorious reviews from pooners here and found my time was very much different than what was posted about them. When I enquired about the poor reviews the responses were quite telling in that some clients had hygiene issues or their expectations were unrealistic and were not advertised as such by the SP.
So I have read this passage a few times and honestly I can not recall any so called "super star" review from any "prolific pooner" who used their online personae to get more out of an SP (are you insinuating against her will?) or pay less for that matter. I say if you are making these accusations, it be best you provide some facts to back up your claims. I'd say in the past ten years here, I have not seen anything like what you claim. Nor have I noted these things on other forums. Something of this magnitude on any forum would get the attention of all active pooners here on Perb.
Kindly post some links so I can see what has wound you up about these prolific people. If its searchable on other forums please advise.
Agreed, some of these SP's can be brutal towards their own sisters. I shake my head sometimes wondering what motivates someone to actively fuck with another persons livelihood and denigrate their character too. This shameful behaviour is happening all the time.
The last time an SP very eloquently posted a review of a client it eventually turned into a shit show with a lot of infighting. I can't see Mods tolerating that stuff here again because its apparent some people prefer bad nasty reviews vs something that may be enlightening from an escorts POV. I would have zero problem with it being a guy who is always into self improvement in whatever I do but don't see it happening here unless the new Admin agrees to offer it.
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Warl0ck
I wrote the Mod about this. It's just a case of forensically extracting the information from 2 smart phones that have sat in a box in my office forever. They weren't wiped. FYI, as a side note to all this even wiping the phone doesn't mean the data goes especially for Android. It's related to SQLite & the VACUUM command. So if you have old 'Droid's destroy the circuits before you recycle them. Even if I did get the information (and I can remember one pooner here now banned who did this) I can't post it. Doing so violates the rules of this forum and if the party was to read it well I'd have to "prove" he wrote it and that would require email headers. I am not going to waste my time doing all that stuff solely to prove a point.
Now, with all due respect BBB. Yes, you are a frequent pooner and you have a good grasp on the industry. But, how would you see such things? It's not likely an SP is going to share those details with you as a pooner (and even as a friend). I realize some people believe I'm making this up, but I really did live with an SP in a serious long term relationship. Being in that situation for an extended period helps one understand this trade from a different perspective than a client. And, as I reiterated to the mod no where did I mention Perb nor did I name anyone. Further, Escape From Stress, who to my knowledge, was in the industry for an extended period agreed with my statement.
As for the move toward GFE that comes about because of natural market forces. As I stated prior, I have no issue with what services a woman sells. What I did say was that there are an element of males who are using sex workers as a replacement for a girlfriend because they're lonely. In a situation like that it's possible that the male could become overly attached (and they do). When/if the SP pulls back on the service they react emotionally because they are emotionally attached. That emotion may lead to anger and spite which results in negative reviews. Do you see many guys falling for an Asian woman at an AMP versus an Indie? No. Ask a woman who is on a dating site what happens when she declines a males offer for a date. Sometimes they are targeted with threats, intimidation, hell...even violence. Same for males though who reject women just the intimidation is less about physical violence.
Perhaps the solution is a review template? I don't know what the answer is to be honest. What I am doing is sharing my knowledge as a person who lived together with someone in the industry.
For this industry to flourish it requires good men as much as it requires good women. Good respectful men make for good clients which makes the lives of these women much easier which makes the industry much better. That's good for all of us, whether you're a pooner or a partner.
There is a lot that goes on behind the scenes on all review boards, that most members are blissfully unaware of.
I could provide names and examples on perb and on other boards, but I won't violate confidentiality.
I've communicated with PerbMod privately about this too.
Let's drop the topic before a good thread gets locked please.
One SP posted her entire excel worksheet of client's information the morning she retired. It was up and available for a couple of hours before the mods killed the thread. Several posters were banned for using reviews as a bargaining tool for sexual services. One SP joked she'd "fuck for food" in chat and had a guy offer food for sex. He's the same the guy that would threaten to "out" SPs for providing Bareback if they didn't give him Bareback.
Reviews should be space limited like Twitter and they shouldn't be able to be commented on. The long "Penthouse" style reviews are usually bullshit anyway - yes an SP called Bullshit on one right after it was posted - and they create an expectation that every Pooner should be entitled to the same service. Despite their budget, hygiene or demeanor. A lot of the "damage" caused by a review is the comments on the review.
"Checkbox" style reviews are not the way to go. People think that they have to check all of the checkboxes or they are not getting the service they are entitled to.
The reality is that the service that a pooner is "entitled" to is governed by budget, hygiene and demeanor. Cheap, smelly, surly Pooners don't get what Generous, polished, kind Pooners get.
What's important in a review is:
Contact Information - how does the interested review reader find her.
Is she real? - pictures real, description real
Does she Cock Block? - does she "make sure the condom stays on", does she position herself so access is denied.
Does she upsell services that she then doesn't provide? - I'm not talking about her booking agent's promises, I'm talking about what she said she would do, and then didn't do.
Did you leave because you felt yourself to be in danger?
Service provided is going to vary according to budget, hygiene and demeanor. If you "negotiate the price", haven't showered in a week or are angry or drunk - she may need the money and just provide what is necessary to get you out of the door.
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