What was the worst BJ you've ever had?

[georgebushmoron]

I have 2 that will forever stay in my memory:

1) With Yuki of Dynasty. She started going down on me when I got a sudden itch in my eye. I closed my eyes and put my hand to one of them to scratch, and two seconds later I was done, put my hand down, opened my eyes, and bj was finished and she was putting on the cover for FS. Thinking back, I don't think I even felt her mouth.

2) This could be either the best bj in the world, or the worst: with a former GF, she was angry at me because earlier in the day she saw me hanging out with another girl at a park (we were just friends). She was incredibly jealous and dumped me, but I convinced her to get back together. Anyway, that evening she was still pissed off. We had sex anyway, and she went to work giving me what started out as a great bj. She sucked and sucked. The pressure was unlike anything I had from her or anyone else before (or after). I can take a lot, but it actually hurt like hell. I swear the head was gonna get ripped right off (and she wasn't even using her teeth), and I begged her to stop. But she kept going and going. I tried to withstand it, but finally I had to actually use my leg to pry her off of me. The next day I woke up to take a piss and found that my underwear was sticking to my dick. As I was prying it off, it turned out my underwear was stuck to the skin under my dick - which was bleeding. I freaked out thinking she had given me a disease, but it was just from the pressure of her mouth.

 

[youngninnocent]

I had this one chick that thought she could lick it like a vagina... It was rather pitiful

 

[elaine]

worst for me was this summer, my partner and I partied all night, we were hung over driving to a colony in the middle of southern manitoba, when we decided to pull over for some fun. As I sat he fed his cock to me standing in the truck, he leaned in so fast and hard, my back molars started to rake him, we were to into the moment, I guess to notice, but after plenty of plunges down my throat, I had broken skin, and rake the crap out of him. Oh it was natsy.

 

[kalel]

.

mine was from one of my ex girlfriends a few years ago. this girl was super nice as a person but fucking clueless about sex so i was kinda teaching her as we go along and she wasn't a good learner. i can't even describe the technique she tried to use but she didn't like putting her mouth directly over the head and just kinda tried to sweep in from the side. i told her to stop cuz it's obvious she was only doing it to please me.

 

[LonelyGhost]

Vancouver.

High Track.

Hot Blonde.

$250.

Supposed to be a CBJ,

turned into a pathetic HJ.

Yeah, you get what you pay for.

 

[LonelyGhost]

Oh yeah, best:

Victoria.

Hot brunette standing outside nightclub waves, so I pull over
(I may be an idiot, but I'm not stupid).

She says she needs $$$ to party with friends (see above )
and quotes $60 for CBJ.

Go to BH Park ... she tells me she's really good at BJ's and proves it ...
then mentions she's horny too ... so we get out of car and have sex
standing up behind car ...

Drop her off back at nightclub.

Go have cheesecake.

mmmmmmmmmmmm Victoria.

 

[Quarter Mile'r]

The worst bj I've ever had is the one I didn't get.


.............QM'r

 

[DJLAW]

mine was from one of my ex girlfriends a few years ago. this girl was super nice as a person but fucking clueless about sex so i was kinda teaching her as we go along and she wasn't a good learner. i can't even describe the technique she tried to use but she didn't like putting her mouth directly over the head and just kinda tried to sweep in from the side. i told her to stop cuz it's obvious she was only doing it to please me.

i had the same experience. only mine didnt even do that side to side thing she was just opening her mouth as wide as humanly possible and makeing a face like i was strangling her kittten. we stopped immediatly.

 

[chilli]

I don't know if I can describe it, but I'll try.

For one we had just started dating and she was bragging about her "oral" skills.

So I am lying on my back, she is standing over top of me - puts her mouth on my member and proceeds to "jump" down on to me.

If you could see the look of horror on my face, my body tensed - waiting for my poor guy to snap.

whew - I can laugh about it now, but it was truly the weirdest bj I've ever heard of or seen.

ps - I never let her near Stanley again. (not that we lasted that much longer after that).

 

[TTTWISTER]

The worst bj I've ever had is the one I didn't get.


.............QM'r

Agreed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[georgebushmoron]

Gee, I forgot to add this one from 3 years ago.... not sure if it's the worst or not, but became the worst as a result of trying to be the best:

Told my GF that only one girl in my life was able to deep throat me, and that she only succeeded twice. So my GF decided she would try to impress me. She tried and tried, gagging a lot (and I had to put up with hitting her molars a lot too). Anyway, finally she relaxed enough and I could feel the head sliding down her throat bit by bit ..... then suddenly, she gagged and puked her whole steak dinner plus rice, peas, corn and wine all over my dick.

Needless to say I lost my hardon right away. The only good thing was that I didn't puke myself and that it was in a hotel room so my bed (nor her's) was soiled.

 

[Nickthenoob]

never had a bj to complete satisfaction nudge nudge wink wink say no more say no more