This. And I bet, most times, you can sense the intent behind the gesture.I am able, capable, independent and all that jazz. I can open my own door (car or otherwise), pull out my own chair, even carry my own heavy things and that's fantastic, go Katey! But I happen to like the chivalry, I feel it is respectful and on the chance they were just pretending to be respectful to check me out, they were going to perv on me either way, they may as well open the door or carry my heavy things at least it keeps their hands busy.
Xo
Katey
Welcome to Hell
- Thread starter ElsiDawson
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When I see a cute puppy, I noticed! When I see a beautiful flower, I notice! When I see a stunning women, I notice! When I see a man pleasing to my eyes, I notice! Seems like human nature to visually take in what we enjoy, I couldn't care less about people taking me in as long as there are no crude comments and everyone keeps their hands to themselves.
Xo
Katey
I think so, I can't remember the last time I got more than a smile and "Have a nice day young lady" from a man holding a door for me. Always makes me smile.
Xo
Katey
Wow Elsi, way to steal my thoughts on this and pass them on as yours! :heh: As someone who spent equal time in Europe, Asia, and Canada growing up, I never had the whole chivalry thing instilled into me. It's a genuinely confusing phenomenon to me, given that in my mind we as human beings have an obligation to assist when we have the means to. So, using the seat as an example, the moral calculation is that exactly, would this person benefit more from sitting more than my lard ass. Often times it's a resounding yes.
On another level, I have been given weird looks on multiple occasions from female coworkers when they mention certain things such as not being able to borrow a male coworkers jacket as it could be misconstrued as sending "signals." My brain nearly broke trying to parse out why borrowing an article of clothing would cause so many issues, especially since it's just borrowing outerwear... I can't imagine what it's like to be bombarded with bizarre, illogical behaviour like that on a daily basis. I am nearly certain I would melt in a puddle of wtfuckery. Dudes are weiiiiiird.
I agree but some ladies view it as being chauvinistic, I was raised to be a gentlemen towards all ladies and its 2nd nature to me. Sometimes though I get the evil eye if I hold a door open for a woman. It gets confusing at times since each lady seems to have a different opinion on whats wrong or right. Therefore ive decided to do what I feel is right. I will be the gentleman and hold the door open because my heart tells me that the correct thing to do.If it lands me a spot in hell, no worries ive got lots of friends there.
If someone thinks I hold a door open or give up my seat, for nefarious reasons, that’s their problem.
I'll hold the damn door open for anyone, male or female.
It is common courtesy, and I've helped many a young lady in the Home Depot parking lot load something in the vehicle.
Here in the interior.....it's always met with a thank you.
It's called Old School, and I belong to the Ibuprofen Chapter.
It is common courtesy, and I've helped many a young lady in the Home Depot parking lot load something in the vehicle.
Here in the interior.....it's always met with a thank you.
It's called Old School, and I belong to the Ibuprofen Chapter.
Just kindly remember that not all white men are part of the power structure, or grew up with privilege.
That said, here's an anecdote about the one time privilege as a white guy was really made obvious to me. I was working in Latin America, the only gringo among a staff of local professionals. The boss and another colleague had to take care of some dreary business at a government office. They asked me to come along, which puzzled me, because I really had no knowledge about the problem they were dealing with. They explained it to me. My job was to stand there in my suit looking like an impatient pissed-off gringo, while they dealt with the bureaucrats. I didn't have to say a word, which was a good thing because at that time I was just learning Spanish.
They got their business done in record time.
So yeah, I have had some experience where I couldn't miss the possession of privilege. It took the foreign environment to make it obvious.
My hairdresser brought up the topic of "privilege" last time I was getting my hair done. She mentioned her family is from a small village in India, a place that doesn't even have electricity. When you want milk there, you don't go to the store to buy it, you go outside and milk the cow. In her opinion, everyone here has "privilege" and it's in no way exclusive to "race"
What she said really resonated with me.
What she said really resonated with me.
I guess that's mostly true, since more than 80% of Canada's population is urban. However I've spent time at places in BC where we did exactly the same thing - went out and milked the cow. Churned our own butter too.
Well - I didn't milk the cow. The matron of the house did that. There was one cow that probably would've killed me if I'd tried to milk it with my clumsy city-boy fingers. But I churned the butter.
Anyone who realistically believes that they can opt out of being prejudged for their race, gender, etc. are experiencing privilege.
(Edit: to be clear, not being prejudged should be the norm and a "right". That some are but others aren't is what makes people call it a privilege.)
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The concept of different “races” is outdated anyways. There’s minimal genetic difference between humans. What we see visibly as physical differences is merely a difference in phenotype expression.
I really didn’t buy all the white privilege noise until Justin Trudeau was re-elected. I have come to realize it exists. How else could someone who wears blackface with a banana stuffed down their pants be re-elected as PM? What is surprising though is that the demographic who complain the most about white privilege are the same demographic that voted for him. Young, hip, “progressive.”
Well, there is such a thing as white privilege. But there is also such a thing as "white guilt". Weird sort of symbiosis between the two there. It's like both sides of this (very American) "culture war" feel justified by having each other as a foe - and neither side seems interested in the idea that "minority" people are fully autonomous humans, capable of having different opinions and being responsible for their own choices.
What does one do when your black knights have white faces, and your white knights are in blackface ? :der:
I'm a complete bastard and a right royal prick because: I thought this thread was about the Venom album, and feel cheated because but it wasn't. :drama:
Another perspective... If any identifiable group other than middle aged white males was targeted it would be condemned as hate speech.
I'm glad Miss Hunter said that. Whenever I say it, the response I get is "OK, boomer".
Ah, but that is a useful response. You immediately know who you are dealing with. If an SJW says that, they also demonstrate they don't practice what they preach.
It's pretty much the same as people who mean "this is gay" as an insult. Except ageism is more stupid. It's like the person is trying to promote a mentality that will kick them in the butt when they get older.
Depends on what "targeted" means. Often, when white males object to being "targeted" it means something that made them feel indignant rather than consequentially impeded. Comments are more readily interpreted as hate speech when they carry an implicit threat.
I guess what I'm saying is that the ego is more fragile. They see other people objecting to tangible constraints on their liberty and get upset because their feelings supposedly aren't being considered too, but not realising the other groups' problems exist on a whole other level. It's a person with a stubbed toe complaining to an amputee.
I'm not sure what your point is. I'm not a white male so I'm not feeling targeted, indignant, believe my feelings are't being considered, or have had my fragile ego shattered by the comments directed about white males. The point was, and remains, that the comments directed at white males on this thread would be considered hate speech if directed at any other identifiable group. If you are going to respond to my post please stick to the point and stop with the quasi-intellectual pontificating.
I'm confused by your reply. You make a "quasi-intellectual pontification", I respond, and you ask me to stick to the point? I was sticking to the point. I contest your conjecture that there is white male hate speech in this thread. Could you be more specific about what you believe is hate speech here?
Edit to add: I was suggesting the only way a white male could interpret this thread as hate speech was via a fragile ego. And while obviously you are not a white male and I fully understand you didn't feel personally targeted, I was suggesting that maybe it was overkill to empathise to such fragility.
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