VICE guide to eating pussy

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A

anonanon

Vancouver Blond Expert
Aug 29, 2006
1,230
4
0
Downtown Vancouver
Mr.O said:
So if I understand it correctly a 96 would be the 2 of you with your backs to each other?

Hey, if ya can get off that way I think you should take your act to the sex circus!
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There's a sex circus? :p
 
H

HeMadeMeDoIt

New member
Feb 12, 2004
2,029
2
0
janesmithferret said:
Wow that is a lot to read.

Frankly I could care less if guys can read. So long as they can pay!
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An Honest ho! nice! do u bbbjtcim? if so msg me! LOL
 
P

privateeyes4u

New member
Jan 26, 2007
5
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THIS is how to make love to a pussy!!!!!!!!

I guess Im a lucky guy. Ive always been sexually sensitive. I love to make love to a pussy. (There is a difference between making love, fucking, and sex).

Tips that always leave my lover in a happy daze....

1. Lick the outside lips, slowly, gently. Its good to kiss the insides of her thighs and lick her around to her sides in her pelvic region. Slowly, yet hungrily. (Not a problem for me as I find my lover delicious!)

2. Let your toungue gently tease her inner labia, running up and down it and maybe sucking it very gently.

3. One thing Ive never heard a complaint about, is gently 'french kissing' her clit. Slowly running your toungue over it in a soft, passionate kiss (Leaving your toungue soft as well...dont ever poke at the clit with your toungue), and letting your lips move over it.

4. After about 10-20 mins of dong everything I described, let your toungue slowly wander into her love canal. Move it in and out as though your toungue was your cock. DONT thrust. Just make your toungue a bit harder and let the tip of it flicker inside her sexy tunnel. It will feel amazing for her and erotic for you.

5. Then go up to her clit and lick it softly, and build up speed. Ive heard most of my other guy friends think speed means rough. I always tell them what I do to my girl, they try it on thier gal and they come back thanking me for the tip! So remember, SOFT...your toungue is not a jackhammer and her clit is not cement!!!!!!!!!

6. There are now two options. Bring her to orgasm with your toungue only, Or move your toungue again into her love tunnel and ask her to stroke her clit while you again toungue her. This poitn is ok for going a bit faster. If you toungue cant handle moving back and forth for too long, then use your neck muscles. Dont be afraid to have your head bobbing a bit from the thrusting of your toungue. She doesnt care if you look silly and chances are she will be feeling so good she wont notice. These two techniques have always brought my lovers to heavy orgasm...

Good luck!
 
A

AustinIdol

New member
Mar 10, 2007
3
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I know this post is dated but I just read it for the first time. What great advise. I am going to print it out and have it laminated and reduced to wallet size. I use it as a cheat sheet next time I go scuba diving.
 
T

The Lizard King

New member
Jul 8, 2003
1,272
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You now have a good minute to get the condom on and take her from the quarters of Prince Muhammad Muhammad Saddat to the cockpit of an F-15.
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So after providing her the benefit of some superior, unprotected oral sex, you're supposed to desensitize your pud with some shrink wrap in the hopes of getting your own rocks off without some unprotected head of your own. Great, just fucking great.
 
T

TTTWISTER

New member
Jul 28, 2006
168
0
0
Chicago
Incall or Outcall

My rates for this service are 200 1/2 hr.

Of course YMMV:D :D
 
M

Mr.O

Banned
Dec 22, 2006
471
0
0
Here, there & in between, it's nicer in-between.
My Rates...

TTTWISTER said:
My rates for this service are 200 1/2 hr.

Of course YMMV:D :D
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... for this service are $200per hour.

I do however, give discounts for exceptionally clean & fresh beaver.

Unfortunately, I must decline service to those who are hygienically challenged.

I prefer clean shaven muffins & provide additional discount for the "baby smooth" variety.

Nice tight labia is also preferred as I already have ear muffs & like to be able to hear the moaning. Additionally having those lips wrapped around my head conjures up memories of horror flicks like "Alien" & "The Pussy that ate Manhattan"!

There is also the consideration for the "adjacent occupant" as I am well aware that every vagina has an asshole for a neighbour. I am perfectly willing to spend as much time visiting with miss "Vagina" as she would like so long as her asshole neighbour does not make an embarrassing comment & has acceptable hygiene such that I feel comfortable being in close quarters.

As a matter of fact I may be inclined to include Vagina`s neighbour in the "fun" if found to be pleasant!

So there is my brief rundown on the matter, for technique you may see my previous post:
https://perb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=564196#post564196


Oh... one other thing! ... I like peanut butter on my pussy!
What can I say... I`m a nutty guy!



Keep it real ladies!
 
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F

freakychef

Unregistered Abuser
Apr 23, 2003
727
2
0
55
In my own imagination!!
I dated a bi sexual girl once and she...........

.............often asked me if I learned to eat pussy from a woman as she thought I did it so well. She said I did it better than some of her female lovers. I love to daty. With the right girl I could go all night. I find the teasing factor to be the best get the woman yearning and squirming until she is ready to explode. Also I like to lick a woman from her feet to her pussy. Make it a foreplay event!!!! Since I learned how to eat pussy I have never had any complaints!!!!!!!
 
M

Miss*Bijou

Sexy Troublemaker
Nov 9, 2006
3,136
44
48
Montréal
BC_Boy said:
I'll be there July 9th
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why wait until July 9th?

I'll give you a private seminar.. ;) 1 on 1 with lots of "hands on" and very practical information, exercises....and maybe homework. You'll be graded based on how loud I get. The best exam you've ever taken for sure.

LOL

:p :p
 
T

The Lizard King

New member
Jul 8, 2003
1,272
0
0
Wow, a four and a half year bump! Funny how time flies but I for one am always up for talking about oral sex. At my age the opportunity and execution may be lacking but hell, I'll sure talk about it! For starters I'd like to know if there was any waiting until July 9th.
 
D

Dgodus

Banned
Nov 5, 2011
855
0
0
Here and There
I see someone click "how to" in the popular searches!

Just like to add there is a how to receive it for women as well:

Move your hips, make some noise/talk, and if it straight up isn't working - make suggestions or offer direction. You have nobody to blame but yourself if you get bad oral sex and you don't speak up. This applies to men as well, but we're generally pretty happy so long as our dick goes in your mouth and teeth stay away.
 
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