To cum or not to cum

[the old maxx50]

When i first got started in the activity .. I could not cum with any of the escort i saw .. and we all got use to that fact , The pressure was there .. but i knew it was not going to happen .. I was a bit of a disappointment to my self and the all the effort the girls put in ..

Then it happened on day , after F*** for 3 yrs , i real was horny and wanted to cum . and i did .. With a bit of effort and a lot of wanking .
It was another while before i managed to do it again .. Same scenario
I was horny as ever and was into the girl I was with .. and with a bit of effort i managed to wank one off ..

But that was it until i met one very special girl that for some reason turned me on more then most .. and then i stated to cum all most every time . Still whacking my self off but it was just easier , i found that place in my mind that allowed me to come to climax with some one .

Then i was able to do it with most escorts I saw .. as long as i could find my place in my mind .

Well it has been 3 yrs or so that I have been cumming .. even though i actually see less escort these day i still manage to perform . But that is what it has become .. I figure i must cum or i am failing ..

It is getting harder to do some days .. and I still have not found any girl that can whack me off to climax or that i can cum inside ... So there is some thing missing ..I keep hoping i will find that one girl that can make it happen ..

What i am wondering is if i should just not bother to try to cum if i real am having to try this hard .. And just go back to long F***ing sessions

 

[lenny]

.. I figure i must cum or i am failing ..

That's how a lot of SP's feel when i don't ejaculate. At least until they learn that i usually prefer not to and usually have the self-control to accomplish it. This must be quite unusual in their experience.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coitus_reservatus

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coitus_interruptus

 

[the old maxx50]

just not being into them body and soul would be the real excuse .. ..

In my case i am older , started having sex late in life ,50 and masturbated most of my life , so it is a number of "handy" caps ..

I think fore play is the most important .. getting arrowsed hours before , by expectation , by talk , by physical contact or proximity to the person // That all helps in bring some one to climax .. It seldom happens with an escort unless you are friends with them . and not paying for all that time ..

In my case i am friends with most of the girls i see and spend time with them , before and after . One person i have lived with .. but seldom have sex with..

I say it is a mental situation that may be solved when i am in a real loving relationship , but it that case it would not really matter if i cum or not ... And also it is about finding some woman that actually wants to take to time , and want to understand what makes me cum.. I have not found one yet .. They see to be happy i can whack off on their tits .

 

[sevenofnine]

i kindof think the physical part the arousal is easy.
im a guy, for christ sake.

the emotional part the finish is the hardest.
my father was and was jailed for sex crimes ok, my mother at times told me i was just like him.
i got aroused like any guy when it came to women sex, but fuck i was so messed up intmacy was scary the emotional part of sex was scary as fucking hell. not with my wife, i was married that was that married people do,
but with escorts, if i had time to think about it, i would just get messed up.
there was an escort i saw we would just fuck no or little talking no time to think about it.


the escort i see now its different in that we spend a lot of time talking,
but its like we talked through it,
i asked her permission to desire her, kept asking her if she was ok, every time i asked her permission to see her again,
i even asked her to forgive me for wanting to come back and well to fuck her.
i saw her for years and years. and most times i could cum enjoyed her company and desired her,
she put up with me laughed at me was amused by me,
but we kindof became close
and i desired her even more.
wierd the relationship between john and an escort.
the emotional part of this hobby.

i posted once along time ago, my father in a nursuing home senile didn't remember who i was over eighty at the time, he could have had sex with every women in that place, he was just wired that way horny always horny and never gave a fuck about any one but himself.
me i care i worry to fucking much im to empathetic,
i worry so much about the person im with, i don't enjoy myself some time.


dont know what the hell im trying to say but there is more then just the physical side to sex.

 

[the old maxx50]

I do agree with you 70f 9 , the emotional part is hard to fine and convey to the person you are with . I have one person that i can be emotional with and we can say we love each other .. It is one of those loves , where you will love some one for the rest of your life , understand them , accept them for who and what they do and care for them all ways .. But sex is not part of it , Only on the rare occasion does it happen . all though she is one woman that gets me aroused with just thinking about her or when we hug , and yet seeing her walking around naked each day does not.

So even though i all ways post these comments about cumming or erections problems . I know it is not all about F***ing and getting off ..

The intimacy is what is missing in most of the encounters with escorts ,that is why i am always just seeing the same one over and over again .. it does help to build that familiarity that make sex better.