Things Porn Teaches

[Cock Throppled]

Women are as horny as men all the time.
Nobody has any body hair.
It is a real turn on to spit on your partner's genitals and even in their face.
Women enjoy rough sex.
All women like anal sex.
Women never get tired jaws.
The more uncomfortable the position the better women like it.
Women need no foreplay at all - ever.
Women love it when you go down on their ass and then kiss them.
All men are hard all the time.
Women never get jealous.
Nobody smells funny - anywhere.
Tearing your partner's clothes turns them on.
Coming on a woman's face is all they really want from sex.
Nobody worries about the furniture.
Even taking off a watch can induce moans of satisfaction from many women.
All men know everything there is to know about pleasing a woman.

 

[bartendr]

Nobody has any body hair.

Ron Jeremy?

 

[Cock Throppled]

Hedgehogs don't count.

 

[Hardatwork]

Nice list but you forgot a couple...

Handyman, delivery guy, pool boy etc aren't glamourous jobs but they all get laid a lot.
All men have schlongs that are hung at least 9 inches.
Bass guitar solos makes for an acceptable soundtrack.

 

[john23]

Nobody minds having 10 bored people standing around watching them while they do it.

 

[georgebushmoron]

Porn teaches that most of the time, real sex sucks.

 

[gravitas]

Things Porn Teaches

you're supposed to wear your socks while having sex

 

[Randy Whorewald]

You're not supposed to come in her mouth, but you should pull out at the last ver millisecond and blow your jizz all over her face and at the same time you're expected to pull a funny face and make your eyeballs bulge.

 

[gravitas]

Things Porn Teaches

there's never ever any problems in getting your cock into a woman's asshole and usually just a little spit on the tip of your dick provides enough lube

 

[Sir Jim]

there's never ever any problems in getting your cock into a woman's asshole and usually just a little spit on the tip of your dick provides enough lube

I've wondered about that too. They rarely show the guy or the gal lubing up. Most of the time the anal scene is cut to after the insertion and then they go at it for 20 mins. I usually have to stop after a bit and reapply for both of our pleasure.

 

[SG4EVAH]

I laughed so hard, just about cried! In other words it was funny!

 

[gordfurb]

And

Women ALWAYS..... have really loud orgasms........

 

[dirtydan]

Another thing porn teaches

All women are bi.

 

[wilde]

Ron Jeremy?

Are you in the right century?




Women can reach orgasm whilst she is giving a HJ, Bj or Russian with no stimulation whatsoever by the dude.

.

 

[bartendr]

Nobody has any body hair.

Are you in the right century?

Did I studder?

 

[Moose]

It's extremely easy to pick up a hot woman that you have never seen let alone know to have sex with. What a world that would be.

 

[dexi]

Every single time you have sex, it'll be preceded by a long, wet, slobbering blowjob, where she will worship at the altar of your johnson, like it (and it alone) gives her the will to go on living.

She will beg you to let her swallow your man chowder.

Girls moan with pleasure while giving blowjobs.

If one of your friends come over and catches you fucking, it won't even phase her, let alone have her scrambling for a towel. In fact, she'll probably pull his prick out of his pants and inhale it. You, of course, will also be OK with this arrangement.

No one ever locks doors. Not front doors, back doors, or bathroom doors. Ever. This often leads to the situation above.

There are no sexually transmitted diseases.

 

[georgebushmoron]

1. Almost all women have pimples on their asses, and you won't lose any wood whatsoever at the sight of them. Hey, that's true!

2. Men don't fall asleep right after sex.

3. Sometimes the guy just disappears in the middle of sex. This is absolutely astounding.


What I've never understood is why the women don't immediately go to the kitchen to bring the man a beer and a sandwich with a smile right after sex. Porn sure isn't realistic.