The Old Pooner's Lament.........

[Bad Santa]

The Old Pooner's Lament

I was pissed off and horny
And I didn't know what to do
When I saw her on PERB
Sayin', "Honey let's screw"
Well you know how it is
When you're down in the shits
And there's a skinny young babe
With long legs and big tits
I said, "sure, c'mon darlin'
I could use some of this!"

Well things didn't go quite the way I had planned,
I had her and three friends try to make old dick stand
The girls laughed and they left, said they'd done their best!
And me, I was left most sorely depressed,
My wallet was empty, the girls had all gone
And suddenly 'old dick head' was again feelin' strong!
And me, I'm left pissed off and horny again
Drownin' my sorrows 'till I'm feelin' no pain
I'm downer than a dead dog buried deep in the dirt
Downer than down, I'm pissed off and hurt
Oh me, oh my oh, what can I do
'Cept to sing this lament for the Old Pooner's blues....


*All rights reserved by The "Sappy Old Pooner"


P.S. I just made this up, it's not a true story! Really!!!
It just "rings" true!

 

[Bad Santa]

I beleive in truth and honesty on PERB, and sure this does not represent the standard that the gals here follow. I too am an old pooner, and this partly could be my song, but the gals have stuck with me till it all happened.

Better luck to you.

Honestly, there is no truth or honesty to this story.

And it's a lament, not a review!

 

[Man Mountain]

That was very creative and I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. Nice work!

 

[edmontonsubbie]

A delightful lament indeed. As I sit here surrounded by the wreckage of 4 years of unfiled taxation issues, I am driven toward thinking this lament would best be put to song with a simple acoustic 6 string and a mouth harp enhancing the more poignant moments. If you like Santa, I can have this turned into a song just like that by an artist whom I retain for just such purpose. She's expensive though....$50. She's funny and has done one for me...turned out great...AND she had to write it too. Maybe I could get it done for $40 since you have put all the effort into the composition of the lyrics.

All smiling aside, a song about yourself is like a special painting hung on the wall. It has that timeless quality to it. And, your lament has all the elements of a good Tom Waits tune....humour and humanity. Well done!

kindest,

eddie

 

[Bad Santa]

That was very creative and I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. Nice work!

A delightful lament indeed. As I sit here surrounded by the wreckage of 4 years of unfiled taxation issues, I am driven toward thinking this lament would best be put to song with a simple acoustic 6 string and a mouth harp enhancing the more poignant moments. If you like Santa, I can have this turned into a song just like that by an artist whom I retain for just such purpose. She's expensive though....$50. She's funny and has done one for me...turned out great...AND she had to write it too. Maybe I could get it done for $40 since you have put all the effort into the composition of the lyrics.

All smiling aside, a song about yourself is like a special painting hung on the wall. It has that timeless quality to it. And, your lament has all the elements of a good Tom Waits tune....humour and humanity. Well done!

kindest,

eddie

Aww thanks MM and Eddie.

So Eddie, you think this girl would lend some music to an old pooner's blues, do you?

Somehow I think her price would go up after she reads those lyrics.

They usually do with most girls after I tell my sad story.....