The Death of Good Manners

[Restless]

I ran across this topic on another board, where it generated a lot of interest and comments.

The original poster there was pointing out the poor manners of men who didn't remove their baseball caps when the national anthem was being played, or when they entered a restaurant.

This also led to the discussion of other social faux pas.

I'm curious what the Perbite family think of the topic.

 

[Restless]

I don't wear baseball caps myself, but I don't find that not removing them during the national anthem is disrespectful. As for a restaurant I guess it would really depend on what type of restaurant you're going to. Honestly, something is bad manners only if other people find it annoying & I'm not so sure those are the best examples.

I can tell you that it was about a 50/50 split between those that considered it very rude and those that felt the same as you.

 

[Ray]

Irritates the heck out of me, in no random order:

Spitting on the sidewalk

Flicking cigarette butts on the street/sidewalk

The whole cell phone courtesy thing

When people 'talk down' to waiters, waitresses, and generally, to folks in low income jobs. There's no need for that.

Butting in line.

When someone tells a story, and someone else needs to tell how they did the exact same thing but better, faster, whatever.

Using profanity loudly in common conversation.

Interrupting conversations.


I'll probably come up with more later.

 

[storm rider]

In short.....good manners are a way of making everyone around you feel as comfortable as you can...by being courtious and gracious.....it is not a way to feel superior.....it is a matter of decency/respect conveyed to other people...other people being strangers or people you know.....and it is lacking in todays society in general.....I had good manners ingrained into me as a child by my father...tis a shame that a good cross section of society did not experience the same thing.

SR

 

[curmudgeon]

Not sure if this is bad manners or not, but it's a pet peeve of mine. Happened just today.

It was lunch time, I stepped out and went to a fast food place to grab some take out.

There was a group of three people in front of me, chatting among themselves. It was not constant conversation, it paused for long stretches. When they arrive at the front of the line, the service clerk asks them for their order, and suddenly then, all three of them pause to look at the overhead menu board.

They then spend the next 5 minutes discussing what they are going to order, the nutritional value of the choice, what they ate yesterday, blah, blah, blah...

Hello? You were waiting in line for 5 minutes before you got the front, and had enough time to decide what you wanted. And do you really need to discuss it as committee? It's fast food lunch, for heaven's sake.

You're holding up the line, chose something and go!!

 

[kelli]

In short.....good manners are a way of making everyone around you feel as comfortable as you can...by being courtious and gracious.....it is not a way to feel superior.....it is a matter of decency/respect conveyed to other people...other people being strangers or people you know.....and it is lacking in todays society in general.....I had good manners ingrained into me as a child by my father...tis a shame that a good cross section of society did not experience the same thing.

SR

I ditto everything you said here SR. I am a big believer in manners, so simple yet they say so much. My parents taught me that manners were important and part of the social graces that seemed to be more prevalent 'back in the day'. I know for me being well-mannered has opened doors that may not have otherwise been opened. I have always appreciated my parents for ensuring this value was instilled in me.
x
kelli

 

[Muffdiver69]

since rain season will soon be upon us. Umbrella people. Why the FUCK do you all insist on walking under awnings and covered sidewalks
with the umbrella open thus forcing those without umbrellas out into the rain. HELLO!!! you have an umbrella!!!!!! it keeps the rain off your stupid
pea-brain head, get out from under the awnings you dipwads

 

[Muffdiver69]

another one that erks me is in stores... say like Capers.
it used to be that store clerks would thank the customer for the business and thus
keeping the snot nosed clerk in a job.
now it seems like you get the look of death if you dont thank the clerk who took the time
to do their job to serve you.

 

[HubbaHubba]

- dudes that cancel their session on my GF thereby pissing her off. Then she comes home and is a grump and I have to work extra hard to coax sex of out her (think about the other man guys).

LOL.....that's just too easy dood
It's right there waiting of one of my witty replies.......but I'm gonna let it slide....yup, let it slide.

 

[badbadboy]

Definitely the baseball hats and not standing during our National Anthem is top of my list. A certain group does not believe our National Anthem is also theirs and they show it by not showing any manners by standing. This bugs me a hell of a lot.

Other ones that bug me are:

Holding a door for someone whether male or female and they don't even acknowledge any courtesy.

Saying "thank you" and their response is "no problem". Am I old fashioned or what? Whatever happened to you are welcome? At least here there is a response. In many places in the USA, you are lucky if they say "uhuh".

People who walk like they are not watching where they are going and just bump into you.

People with umbrellas who do not watch what they are doing with it. I am tall and have been hit in the eye a few times. Now when I see an umbrella coming at me I knock it out of my way first.

 

[HubbaHubba]

Definitely the baseball hats and not standing during our National Anthem is top of my list. A certain group does not believe our National Anthem is also theirs and they show it by not showing any manners by standing. This bugs me a hell of a lot.

Agreed...very disrespectful. On a side note, I personally don't think National Anthems should be played at sporting events. The exception being if it's a world event.

 

[tboy]

Not standing for the National Anthem is at the top of my list at sporting events. I see people all the time walking to their seats or remain seated during the playing of the National Anthem.

One that bugs me is when people board buses or trains before letting others off. That really ticks me off.

Definitely the baseball hats and not standing during our National Anthem is top of my list. A certain group does not believe our National Anthem is also theirs and they show it by not showing any manners by standing. This bugs me a hell of a lot.
.

 

[Restless]

Good items.

I'm curious though. How many find the ball cap thing an issue?

I'm betting it is a generational thing.

Older people find it rude not to remove the cap, younger people don't get why you would ask the question.

 

[HubbaHubba]

Good items.

I'm curious though. How many find the ball cap thing an issue?

I'm betting it is a generational thing.

Older people find it rude not to remove the cap, younger people don't get why you would ask the question.

I'm betting you're wrong. Nothing to do with being a generation thing and everything to do with lack of parenting or respect. It's common sense to remove a cap during the National Anthem.....having said that......

Black guys calling each other the N word wasn't ever socially acceptable either.....now it's a punch line. In my books it's an absolute slap in the face to those who had to endure a period of slavery or outright bigotry.

Blame it on a generation gap.....I blame it on ignorance.

 

[Bartdude]

The anthem thing, and other such ceremonial things, I can understand.

But restaurants, I don't know. I see farmers with stetsons and caps on all the time in restaurants. I can see in a formal dining room how it might be out of place, but in a Denny's?

This one time, I went golfing, and it was blazing hot, so I wore a cap to protect my head.

From there, I had to go straight to dinner with relatives. I did not have time or opportunity to take a shower or change. Because I was about due for a haircut, my hair was quite long (for me).

I met my relatives in a casual dining steakhouse, nothing fancy. But my mom insisted I remove my cap. I told her my hair was a disaster, and I was keeping my cap on to avoid looking stupid in front of 200 people. But she relented.

I took my cap off, and my hair was ridiculous. I got stares and funny looks all night long.

So, you tell me. What would have been more disruptive?

 

[HubbaHubba]

The anthem thing, and other such ceremonial things, I can understand.

But restaurants, I don't know. I see farmers with stetsons and caps on all the time in restaurants. I can see in a formal dining room how it might be out of place, but in a Denny's?

This one time, I went golfing, and it was blazing hot, so I wore a cap to protect my head.

From there, I had to go straight to dinner with relatives. Because I was about due for a haircut, my hair was quite long (for me).

I met my relatives in a casual dining steakhouse, nothing fancy. But my mom insisted I remove my cap. I told her my hair was a disaster, and I was keeping my cap on to avoid looking stupid in front of 200 people. But she relented.

I took my cap off, and my hair was ridiculous. I got stares and funny looks all night long.

So, you tell me. What would have been more disruptive?

You made your mom happy, so you did the right thing

 

[jnewton]

You made your mom happy, so you did the right thing

Didn't someone write earlier that it was about making other people (your mom) comfortable? I didn't see anything about making you comfortable. LOL