I was about to say the same thing! Wow. There's clearly an underlying disdain for Western SP's in most of his posts, obviously a jealousy over their rates. I will say my conversations with women have never sounded anything as awkward as that example. Hanging out happened very naturally, more of a continuation of a fun session because we both didn't have other plans afterwards. If that's how you think a guy should about it Tant, you are so so very wrong.
Taking an SP out socially, off the clock: any experience you want to share?
- Thread starter tantalizeme
- Start date
I agree. I find most SP's to be 'nicer' people than their civilian counterparts. I've encountered some really nasty civvies, but cannot imagine an exchange like the one that Tant described coming from a pro. If the answer is no, it would be said in a nice way.
Maybe I've just been lucky.
I don't think I have any special relationship with my sp.
I mean were friends and we go out and just do friend things from time to time.
I work, and guess what I have friends from work who I do just that with.
In everything I do as I go about my life, I kind of have friends and invitations from people to do things with, I don't have time to do them all.
Why should my being in this hobby be any different?
Yeah she is a women, But there are girls from work, and that I meet all the time. I try very hard to be respectful of them and not get into any sexual or emotional entanglements, that would cause drama or unwanted situations for both of us.
Yeah girls and guys are different, But that is kind of why I like girls.
Its fun to fall in love, sex is fun, again that is why I like girls.
But I think you have to know yourself. What is good for you.
And know the person your dealing with, what is good for them.
My sp I think has a lot of courage, She was stalked recently had a very trying time.
and here was I just a client a long time client. But gettin sort of involved.
I think she had a lot of courage to let me, and not send my packing.
Some one else would say, I might have been manipulated or whatever because Im still seeing her and paying her.
But I have enjoyed whatever feelings I have felt.
In a sense you have to want to care or be involved have a friend and fall in love. You can't blame some one for that.
Like I said Im an old guy, be there done that many times before, it didn't bother me, and I wasn't afraid of doing something stupid like stalking her or running away telling my wife and running away and ruining my life.
It was and is just nice to have her there.
I don't want to speak for her, but she must feel the same, we go out off the clock to pubs near her house where her friends and family frequent, and have bumped into people, but we still go there,
She has hidden nothing from me about her life.
But you know, I have seen her for years.
Just curious but isn't that the way its suppossed to work.
You know some one for years, isn't your trust and friendship supposed to grow and deepen.
I personally think that says something, I have seen her for say ten years ago, she was the second sp I saw in this.
I still see her, see her for sessions, and see her just because we want to.
I don't really know what that says, but it says a hell of a lot,
It really depends how you see it, on what your perception is. Your take on life and this hobby.
And I guess where you are in life.
I don't think there is a right or wrong.
Its only wrong when you start to force people into situations,
and it doesn't do you any dam good to blame some one for your problems.
Face them face yourself.
The hardest thing in the world you will ever have to deal with is yourself.
I mean were friends and we go out and just do friend things from time to time.
I work, and guess what I have friends from work who I do just that with.
In everything I do as I go about my life, I kind of have friends and invitations from people to do things with, I don't have time to do them all.
Why should my being in this hobby be any different?
Yeah she is a women, But there are girls from work, and that I meet all the time. I try very hard to be respectful of them and not get into any sexual or emotional entanglements, that would cause drama or unwanted situations for both of us.
Yeah girls and guys are different, But that is kind of why I like girls.
Its fun to fall in love, sex is fun, again that is why I like girls.
But I think you have to know yourself. What is good for you.
And know the person your dealing with, what is good for them.
My sp I think has a lot of courage, She was stalked recently had a very trying time.
and here was I just a client a long time client. But gettin sort of involved.
I think she had a lot of courage to let me, and not send my packing.
Some one else would say, I might have been manipulated or whatever because Im still seeing her and paying her.
But I have enjoyed whatever feelings I have felt.
In a sense you have to want to care or be involved have a friend and fall in love. You can't blame some one for that.
Like I said Im an old guy, be there done that many times before, it didn't bother me, and I wasn't afraid of doing something stupid like stalking her or running away telling my wife and running away and ruining my life.
It was and is just nice to have her there.
I don't want to speak for her, but she must feel the same, we go out off the clock to pubs near her house where her friends and family frequent, and have bumped into people, but we still go there,
She has hidden nothing from me about her life.
But you know, I have seen her for years.
Just curious but isn't that the way its suppossed to work.
You know some one for years, isn't your trust and friendship supposed to grow and deepen.
I personally think that says something, I have seen her for say ten years ago, she was the second sp I saw in this.
I still see her, see her for sessions, and see her just because we want to.
I don't really know what that says, but it says a hell of a lot,
It really depends how you see it, on what your perception is. Your take on life and this hobby.
And I guess where you are in life.
I don't think there is a right or wrong.
Its only wrong when you start to force people into situations,
and it doesn't do you any dam good to blame some one for your problems.
Face them face yourself.
The hardest thing in the world you will ever have to deal with is yourself.
If there is a lack of equity, as in one party doesn't get much out of hanging out, then why would they agree to go do something? If both parties have something to offer in the way of great conversation, knowledge of an excellent restaurant or event that suits the other person's tastes, ect... then why shouldn't they hang out?
Perhaps a difference in age? I never think of it, but despite going bald at 20, (3 cheers for jobs working with horrible chemicals...) I suppose I am relatively young as compared to your average poster here. Maybe since I've met SP's normally in some of my course work, and within social circles, that's why it seems perfectly normal to grab a drink, or hit up an art show?
My suggestion, see her professionally and chat during downtimes. If you find you have similar interests then explore them. If you want to try dating that 20 year old petite cutie with mildly submissive tendencies, who is both open minded and super intelligent, then get in line, and abandon all hope, because so does almost everyone else who meets her.
Smarmy Condescension! That's the exact phrase I was looking for, after deleting and retyping so many different things I finally ended up with passive condescension but that just never felt right. Thanks
God I miss lasagne, I don't know why I've never bothered to learn how to make it myself... I make crazy time consuming pastas all the time but lasagne is never one of them.
Poor Tant, comes out with some honest sharing of his lif experience to he gets lambasted by the psycho-anylitcal cheap seats.
If you don't like his posts.... Don't read them.
No need to get personal and judge someone you don't even know....
If you don't like his posts.... Don't read them.
No need to get personal and judge someone you don't even know....
Indeed...there seems to be a "I hate Tant' club here who seem to think he's 'creepy' for being honest and open in his reviews and for attempting to inspire a thoughtful topic by relating his experiences and observances. Since most are local Sp's and their 'white knight' supporters who are against stretching your horizons, maybe stepping out of your comfort zone once in a while....what was the harm with Tant asking on the spur of the moment an Asian Sp out who is not from here, has no friends and is bored and lonely? Did he take her to his pig farm? No...and he paid her way, and paid her for a romp afterward. Oh and watchout...he gave her eye shadow to wear...how sinister!
As a few of you think that jumping and piling on Tant is fun, flaming and shitting on him and his ideas....kinda like bullying, isn't it? Did it make you feel more righteous and better than him? Morally superior? Hijacking his thread on what could have been an interesting thread turned into a flame fest on Tant. Misogynist....creep...serial killer? Wow. Get over yourselves....really.
Hi Tant. I'm also learning some mandarin and seeing asian sp's. She likes helping me with mandarin. When I told her I wanted to go to a karaoke club she said yes. We spent an hour or so in a private karaoke club (pretty cool actually I can imagine what goes on in those rooms late night) singing in both mandarin and english then went to a chinese restaurant for dinner.
I haven't been out socially with a woman for decades so I really enjoyed this.
o7O
I haven't been out socially with a woman for decades so I really enjoyed this.
o7O
I have a favourite long time client I see, who faithfully brings me the most lovely stalkings with every visit..and only once did he not rip them off me. At my request. They were just too nice, you know, silk and patterned, and absolutely a delight to slide on, probably in the $40 range. And after we are finished, we go for bubble tea. True story.
The way you folks are using the term rent or buy means the same thing.
Definition of 'Economic Rent'
The amount of money an owner of a factor of production must receive in order for that owner to rent out that factor of production. Factors of production include labor, capital and land.
Definition of 'Economic Rent'
The amount of money an owner of a factor of production must receive in order for that owner to rent out that factor of production. Factors of production include labor, capital and land.
The way I see this dog pile on Tant is because he is unabashed sexual adventurer with Asian ladies. He probably poons many times per week and would be unable to afford to see many of the advertisers here because of the cost. I know I had one week where I saw three different (advertiser) SP's for 90 minutes each. Memorable week for sure but crazy expensive and I had to pull back on the hobby as a result for a while. Tant on the other hand can see someone every day and the cost is always under $200.
With reference to his reviews, they are really no different than some I have read from other pooners who get into fairly graphic detail about their adventures. Most, I would guestimate almost all advertisers here would not appreciate these types of graphic reviews. Tant and others are able to do it because many of the Asian SP'S probably have no idea what Perb is and they probably don't care either.
Whether we like it or not, Perb is divided down the middle racially where we have pooners looking for a good Asian bang for the buck and other pooners wanting to hook up with hot non asian SP's. People may be turning a blind eye to this fact but it is there for sure.
With respect to the OP's question about socializing off the clock; yes I have many times whether its simply meet for coffee, lunch, hang out at a park and talk, do a few errands together etc. Do some retail therapy too and then head back to her place for some fun. It's all about connection and treating people with respect and being totally non judgemental.
With reference to his reviews, they are really no different than some I have read from other pooners who get into fairly graphic detail about their adventures. Most, I would guestimate almost all advertisers here would not appreciate these types of graphic reviews. Tant and others are able to do it because many of the Asian SP'S probably have no idea what Perb is and they probably don't care either.
Whether we like it or not, Perb is divided down the middle racially where we have pooners looking for a good Asian bang for the buck and other pooners wanting to hook up with hot non asian SP's. People may be turning a blind eye to this fact but it is there for sure.
With respect to the OP's question about socializing off the clock; yes I have many times whether its simply meet for coffee, lunch, hang out at a park and talk, do a few errands together etc. Do some retail therapy too and then head back to her place for some fun. It's all about connection and treating people with respect and being totally non judgemental.
..........really, how does that work..........?
.....................couldn't resist.......
That's one thing that I've been wondering about. Would this thread be different if ethnicity wasn't a factor? What is the OP's ethnic background? Does it make the conversation different if he's Caucasian or Asian? Just wondering if the views here are a reflection on society's views of different ethnic SPs in this hobby...
Wow, not often a thread gets pushed to over 100 posts!
Warms my heart to hear of your constructive steps in reaching out to women again...after decades of not "being out socially with a woman"??!!
Please tell us more about your karaoke ventures with Asian SPs. Yes, even a smattering of Mandarin—and knowing a few Chinese songs like "Yueliang daibiao wode xin"—can endear you massively to some of these contact-hungry Asian SPs.
The topic of "Taking an SP out socially" seems to have touched a nerve. I'm proud we've lured even a few infrequent posters out of the woodwork. For me, it's all in the interest of good clean fun.
I'm pleased by my share of sympathizers on this Board. I especially appreciate posts by Alexandria, cuteangie, NMR, vancity cowboy, badbadboy, ratfink, myselftheother, summerbreeze, yazoo, sevenofnine, Tim McGee, Death or Glory, honda 761 and barny-stinson. I also thank Sleepmonger for his somewhat ambivalent invitation to buy me a beer anytime (no worry, I'd not want to dress you up in pantyhose and fuck you!)
A few brothers on here—and the occasional SP—seem quick to anger and sometimes use intemperate language. One of them called me a "troll" filled with "swarmy condescendingness." Mercifully, he promises to put my posts on "ignore." We'll see if he sticks to his promise. Awfully tempting to dump on tantalizeme's posts, isn't it?
I ended my imaginary little dialogue between an SP and a moonstruck pooner with a bit of cruel honesty, for the sake of dramatic effect. Obviously, a real-life SP would very probably be far more diplomatic in getting rid of a pooner who pesters her for off-the-clock time.
As for Caramel's knee-jerk response that I've "misogynistic feelings," I can assure her I'm one of the most women-loving men on this planet.
Appreciate havetonguewilltravel's compliment that "lovers of purple prose" would find my writing style "eloquent."
Miss Melody has been the most vocal contrarian here. But she seems conflicted about exactly what she wants to accuse me of. So she's not opposed to ripping pantyhose after all—just to my bringing my own brand-new pair, rather than arranging for my SP to buy one herself! Only a serial killer, she suggests, would bring his prefered brand of sexy lingerie to an SP (though I see, a sweet lady named Alexandria disagrees).
What especially raises Miss Melody's ire is that I sometimes talk about "my SP" rather than "an SP"—which, to her, indicates possessiveness on my part. Women, she says, are not objects to be owned or rented.
Well, I won't go into renting someone's time as opposed to renting someone's personhood—I see that distinction has been covered by brothers havetonguewilltravel & death and glory. Let me just stress, I don't want to own anybody, and I'm in this hobby precisely because any form of monogamous commitment smacks far too much of mutual ownership to me.
Couldn't help noticing a certain meanness on this Board lately. The reasons for the number of grumps and meanies around here is probably that many people in this hobby are walking bundles of frustration, resentment and hostility—which they then displace on posters whose opinion they don't like.
Let me give them one piece of totally non-condescending advice: having a short fuse is a major handicap in this hobby, no matter whether you're a pooner or an SP.
As a person I would probably like tant, he's intelligent enough, articulate, and gentlemanly in a passively condescending way. I'd buy him a beer anytime; I'd just feel uncomfortable if he put me in pantyhose before trying to fuck me.
Hey rat fink,
Warms my heart to hear of your constructive steps in reaching out to women again...after decades of not "being out socially with a woman"??!!
Please tell us more about your karaoke ventures with Asian SPs. Yes, even a smattering of Mandarin—and knowing a few Chinese songs like "Yueliang daibiao wode xin"—can endear you massively to some of these contact-hungry Asian SPs.
The topic of "Taking an SP out socially" seems to have touched a nerve. I'm proud we've lured even a few infrequent posters out of the woodwork. For me, it's all in the interest of good clean fun.
I'm pleased by my share of sympathizers on this Board. I especially appreciate posts by Alexandria, cuteangie, NMR, vancity cowboy, badbadboy, ratfink, myselftheother, summerbreeze, yazoo, sevenofnine, Tim McGee, Death or Glory, honda 761 and barny-stinson. I also thank Sleepmonger for his somewhat ambivalent invitation to buy me a beer anytime (no worry, I'd not want to dress you up in pantyhose and fuck you!)
A few brothers on here—and the occasional SP—seem quick to anger and sometimes use intemperate language. One of them called me a "troll" filled with "swarmy condescendingness." Mercifully, he promises to put my posts on "ignore." We'll see if he sticks to his promise. Awfully tempting to dump on tantalizeme's posts, isn't it?
I ended my imaginary little dialogue between an SP and a moonstruck pooner with a bit of cruel honesty, for the sake of dramatic effect. Obviously, a real-life SP would very probably be far more diplomatic in getting rid of a pooner who pesters her for off-the-clock time.
As for Caramel's knee-jerk response that I've "misogynistic feelings," I can assure her I'm one of the most women-loving men on this planet.
Appreciate havetonguewilltravel's compliment that "lovers of purple prose" would find my writing style "eloquent."
Miss Melody has been the most vocal contrarian here. But she seems conflicted about exactly what she wants to accuse me of. So she's not opposed to ripping pantyhose after all—just to my bringing my own brand-new pair, rather than arranging for my SP to buy one herself! Only a serial killer, she suggests, would bring his prefered brand of sexy lingerie to an SP (though I see, a sweet lady named Alexandria disagrees).
What especially raises Miss Melody's ire is that I sometimes talk about "my SP" rather than "an SP"—which, to her, indicates possessiveness on my part. Women, she says, are not objects to be owned or rented.
Well, I won't go into renting someone's time as opposed to renting someone's personhood—I see that distinction has been covered by brothers havetonguewilltravel & death and glory. Let me just stress, I don't want to own anybody, and I'm in this hobby precisely because any form of monogamous commitment smacks far too much of mutual ownership to me.
Couldn't help noticing a certain meanness on this Board lately. The reasons for the number of grumps and meanies around here is probably that many people in this hobby are walking bundles of frustration, resentment and hostility—which they then displace on posters whose opinion they don't like.
Let me give them one piece of totally non-condescending advice: having a short fuse is a major handicap in this hobby, no matter whether you're a pooner or an SP.
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my problem is with the leech comment, my concerns that a ride was offered with the knowledge that she would then be in an unfamiliar place in a country where her fluency in the language and personal network of friends is limited with no backup plan for how she would get home if she ticked this guy off, reviewing an off the clock experience on a professional board, and then making a point of saying he wouldn't hang out with her again if she wanted to.
I think its a fairly shitty way to treat a human, personally, and he posted it with the full knowledge it would be getting feedback, so why are we pulling the race card?
you're welcome
how did you get so danged wise pardner? you read this stuff in a book somewhere... :thumb:
