SP's and NA/AA, Thoughts?

[Monique Lush]

So im sure im not alone when i say i have spend my fair share of hard cash on parties and being broke by the next day. I decided to take another rout this time in my journey of Service Providing.
Thats the road of NA / AA. Not because i was a a raging alcoholic, (i only partied maybe a 5 times a month). Nor was i a drug pusher. But still i needed to find a way to save my money.
ALOT more of it then i have been anyway. Going to meetings helps me keep my head on straight with a wallet full of cash. I dont go nuts in the mall with clothes, i pay rent and bills instead.
I dont go out to expensive restraints i just cant afford, i pay my student loans instead. All this and i feel healthier and happier to be free from my bad spending habits and now in control.
I guess its more of a Money Anonymous Heheh. I wont leave out the need to go DT for drinks with the girls everytime i just got paid. My bills would most times be over $700 bucks. Money i just
couldn't be affording to throw away to a night.

Alot of people find an SP in NA/AA discouraging, but i would of thought they'd find it promising, To know someones gonna be in a good mind and good health when they see them.
All the people i meet that are clean are such wonderful people and they look so good. They work out everyday and go tanning, and they have a good head on their shoulders.

Is this not something that could too be found a good trait to have in an SP as well?

 

[VanessaofBC]

Monique......not one once do I see what you wrote " discouraging"!! Instead, I now see a smart lady who knows and sees what really matters in life. Changing to a better route is nothing but positive :thumb::clap2:.

There are a lot who say .... " I should do this " ...Ya, I know but...etc etc. That is what separates the good from the bad. Having a balance is the key as long as you know when the time to pull back is . Always pay yourself first and more if you can.

At the end of the day, when you see you are succeeding, you'll see how much stronger you really are

Never met you but I say.....you GO girl and conquer the goal you have. I applaud you :clap2:

Be safe


PS....I smoked cigs, indulged in other stuff way back and was over weight at one time. Now....reverse all of that. I quit all that smoking many yrs ago, I workout regularly and rarely do I drink now except the rare occasion that I go out for a beer or glass of red wine. Ya.....I'm boring now but I'm happier and feel much better

It is so rewarding and fulfilling to be able to pay all your bills on the first of the month. Even if they are not due until the end of the month I still pay them on the first. I also like to pay my rent early if I can. Keeps me looking good to the landlord!
For me, it was figuring out what I NEEDED and what I WANTED. As soon as I made that distinction I was able to cut down on my shopping habit. The days of buying clothes that I only wear once (maybe twice) are over. Now gone are the shirts that hang in my closet forever, tags still on.

Don't get me wrong. I still like to carry designer stuff, so I have a few things. I bought them after I paid my bills!

Good luck hun!

 

[mounty]

I think you need to take one step at a time. Make sure you hard earned money works for you. Check online their is tons of information on to save money or not spend it. Make a budget and try to stick to it. I always pay my bills and save money for my hobbies. Even though the day I get my pay check I want to spend all the money on my hobby. Then, I take a deep breath and count of debts usually I just have portion left for my hobbit and I make sure I spend it on the most reputable sp instead of someone who is not reviewed. I am kind of still new. I wish you all the good luck and do spend some money on yourself at least some portion. I think even thinking about it the first step in right direction.

 

[Monique Lush]

Thanks guys for your feed back <3 hope others find this thread helpfull as well

 

[PlayfulAlex]

So im sure im not alone when i say i have spend my fair share of hard cash on parties and being broke by the next day. I decided to take another rout this time in my journey of Service Providing.

Thats the road of NA / AA. Not because i was a a raging alcoholic, (i only partied maybe a 5 times a month). Nor was i a drug pusher. But still i needed to find a way to save my money.
ALOT more of it then i have been anyway. Going to meetings helps me keep my head on straight with a wallet full of cash. I dont go nuts in the mall with clothes, i pay rent and bills instead.

I dont go out to expensive restraints i just cant afford, i pay my student loans instead. All this and i feel healthier and happier to be free from my bad spending habits and now in control.
I guess its more of a Money Anonymous Heheh. I wont leave out the need to go DT for drinks with the girls everytime i just got paid. My bills would most times be over $700 bucks. Money i just couldn't be affording to throw away to a night.

Alot of people find an SP in NA/AA discouraging, but i would of thought they'd find it promising, To know someones gonna be in a good mind and good health when they see them.
All the people i meet that are clean are such wonderful people and they look so good. They work out everyday and go tanning, and they have a good head on their shoulders.

Is this not something that could too be found a good trait to have in an SP as well?

Good on you, Miss Monique, for recognizing that things had to change, and then for finding a support network. I've also heard that some people find this 12 step group helpful for shopping and spending addiction...

http://debtorsanonymousvancouver.com

 

[Elle Diablo]

Wooo Hooo! A standing applause :clap2: Monique.

So many girls get into this business without a plan or goals and perhaps no direction and at some time or other get stuck. Good on you for taking a stand and looking out for yourself. And that you do it now with what sounds to be a clear mind. The mountain is high, but the way down is a breeze.

 

[Ms Erica Phoenix]

I have had more than a nodding acquaintance with the 12 Steps in my life, since the late 90s in fact. I have said in the time that there ought to be a Human Beings Anonymous where we can all go to learn how to be better people, be accountable for our own behaviour, put right things we've made wrong, and help others get through the same shit we have without having to go through the rough shit we all go through. Although I was a nice respectable upper middle class lace curtain binge drunk, I sat in 'the rooms' and listened to my story being told by street sex workers, and thieves, and a convicted murderer, but they were all talking about the same things as I felt!

When I had my cushy union job that I assumed would always be there, I thought I was done being able to help people and teach. Teaching is what I loved most in the world. I love to watch somebody's eyes light up when the connection is made in their brain and they think "Aha!"...but I had no money, no savings, and I hated my life. I have learned how to save and how not to spend. I spend carefully, and I read pricetags, and I comparison shop. I am building a 'war chest', and when it hits the magic full mark, Spain and its marvelous beaches, incredible horses and handsome people are calling my name.

Have a goal, then make a plan. A goal without a plan is just a wish. Best of luck to everyone!

 

[dickotoole]

I think many people struggle to learn how to manage money so it doesn't manage them - or the constant shortage of it manages them. Lottery winners are typically broke (worse off than before 'winning') in seven years after winning. Having a lot of money early in life (oil rig workers, providers . . .) allows people to get away with binge spending and "I can afford anything" attitudes. Some never recover and wind up destitute and having to work way longer than they ever imagined.

Congratulations Monique, and to help you out next time I am in Vancouver I will drop by and contribute to your holiday fund - perhaps a large deposit for a trip to Greece?

 

[Monique Lush]

I think many people struggle to learn how to manage money so it doesn't manage them - or the constant shortage of it manages them. Lottery winners are typically broke (worse off than before 'winning') in seven years after winning. Having a lot of money early in life (oil rig workers, providers . . .) allows people to get away with binge spending and "I can afford anything" attitudes. Some never recover and wind up destitute and having to work way longer than they ever imagined.

Congratulations Monique, and to help you out next time I am in Vancouver I will drop by and contribute to your holiday fund - perhaps a large deposit for a trip to Greece?

You know whats sad? i never even been outside Canada... like iv been to California but that was on a family road trip.... lol its sad how much iv wasted in my life... Greece i heard has the most beautiful beaches <3

 

[myselftheother]

Hey there Monique. Read your post on you using NA/AA meetings to deal with your shopping addiction. I think it's great that you've recognized you have an issue that's gotten out of control, and that you can't stop. I would, if I were you, find support in 12 step groups that deal with money related issues....somewhere out there are support groups that will help you figure out the why you are blowing huge amounts of money instead of the bills and obligations that need to be taken care of. But, I would suggest that in the meantime to continue to go, listen to what's being said about addiction, how they got to rock bottom, and what they had to do to get to where they are somewhat functioning in society. I also noticed you said that you only party 5 times a month...honey, that's once a week. And, if the definition of partying is what most of us understand what partying entails...booze,etc...which is quite alot since that equates to being at least once a week....binge shopping can be replaced by other addictions, activities.

Keep going, talk to other women there, get a few phone numbers, start reading about the 12 steps, what they mean to others, what they might mean to you. I don't know if you have started or gotten that far, as it's tough coming out of your comfort zone. Join a step group, do the steps, sort out some shit....one day at a time.