socializing in clubs

[the_shogun]

Well i just got back home from a night out, pretty decent altogether. of recent i decided i'm going to try to work on my game, and of course by game i mean picking up girls. of course the best way to pick up girls is simply just to talk to them (and no i don't mean pick up lines......)

here's where my problem comes in, finding good conversation starters that will create an interesting conversation with someone you just met. and this doesn't go for just women only, i would like to be able to strike up a good conversation with anyone that i've just met. in all i'm trying to be a more social person.

 

[ihatemyskirt]

Yo Shogun, don't TRY so hard, it will show and it won't work in your favour. Try being an asshole, that is sure to work. You will get laid all day long, probably even find the woman of your dreams.

 

[the_shogun]

well yeah, i mean that's basic common small talk. i mean eventually it runs dry. the same ole boring questions like "who are you with?" "what do you do?"

i usually try to find something interesting about the person and commenting on it.

 

[Mr Blonde]

rant...

i've never been able to socialize in a club atmosphere. with the noise, and crowded people and such, its just a pain. if i'm in a pub atmosphere, or a lounge it's not so bad. but if you see me in a club, chances are i'm just there to drink with my buds and have a good time. in all honesty, the women in clubs are of about the same quality as the men. not that i would know the female's perspective.

and when it comes to "macking bitches" nothing beats confidence and a sense of humor.

in any situation, i approach women not on the basis that i'm trying to get them to go out with me, but rather from the perspective of; would i want to go out with them. if i'm talking to a girl and she's copping attitude on me, then chances are she isn't going to change much further on down the road.

be yourself. and all that crap. it's true, and it keeps thing simple.

crap i look for:
if she's playing with her hair while we're talking, you go in for the kill. that's a subconscious indicator of interest for a female.
is her laugh genuine? does she even like to laugh? (charis, from the cfox morning show has THE sexiest laugh ever)
does she keep eye contact?
does she have anything to say? does she bring anything to the conversation, or does she just sit there and try to look fuckable

i am at the point in my life where when it comes to sex my mind starts to wander half way through the second time around. so there's got to be more to keep me around then a nice bum and perfect skin. but that's getting away from the point in the thread.

one more thing. if you get past the whole socializing in the club thing. and you actually find yourself dating someone. i heard this in "A Bronx Tale" with Robert DeNiro and Chaz Palminteri. And I swear to god this is as close to the truth as you'll ever get. When you pick a girl up for a date. You pull up to her house, when you get out of the car make sure both doors are locked. You bring her to the car, unlock and open the door for her, let her get in, then close the door behind her. walk around the back of the car and stop at the rear window. If she doesn't reach over and unlock your door for you. You dump her. As soon as possible. Why? Because if she doesn't reach over and lift that button for you it means she's selfish and all you're seeing is the tip of the iceberg.

it isn't exactly original, but i swear to god, in my experience, its the truth.

 

[the_shogun]

shoes eh? that's a good one' i'll remember it.

i like to challenge girls to dance offs sometimes

 

[BC_Boy]

some ideas

talk about something in the context, talk about something she is wearing/doing, ask her a question where u r asking for her opinion

with all due respect to Miss Shay, small talk usually aint good cause its boring and she has probably been talked to 5+ times that night.

tease her, poke fun at her, make fun of her yet without insulting her.

 

[BC_Boy]

A woman luvs when you compliment on their shoes, toes, and hair. Well, it works for me!!!

true, as long as you dont compliment too much or make exaggerated compliments. and be very casual about it.

 

[BC_Boy]

To us sensitve girls who are, *ahem* a little "touchy" we may take honest teasing, and "Poking" the wrong way!!
But a friendly NUDGE, instead ofa poke may be better. Poking is Juvenile anywy!

true.....but the purpose isn't to insult her, make her cry and destroy her self-esteem......its to make her laugh, get under her skin a little, show confidence.........besides, IMHO, if she can't take a little harmless teasing, she wouldn't be the girl I want to be around.

On a related note, I once called a girl (who I know for a while) fat (which I wouldn't normally suggest), and then she asked me out

 

[87112]

If a woman touches you any way , whether its a small tap on the arm, shoulder, anywhere FIRST you are in. This test has never failed.

 

[BC_Boy]

Teasing the first day you meet her???? Uhhh, I donno bout that. Most people wait, and get to know a person first before the go into any type of teasing I would think!
I could be wrong, but EVERYONE is different!


She asked you out!!! Good for you!! Great pick-up line on your part I guess. I like the term PHAT. Pretty Hot And Tempting!

Oh I wasn't "PHAT" I called her.........she was pretty pissed off at me; but once she cooled down, she asked me out

 

[MrPeterNorth]

The key is to bust the balls of the 9's and the 10's. Complimenting their hair, their shoes, etc. is what every OTHER guy does. But if you tease a 9 or a 10, it rattles them a little. It takes them off their pedestal for a brief enough time to get past their built-up fortress. eg. You see a lady wearing those over-sized shades and you walk up to her and say something along the lines of : "Nice shades, I think my grandmother has a pair just like them!" and walk away.

In general I think it's a good test to see how they respond to teasing and sarcasm. It's amazing when you can banter with someone who has some backbone. Usually leads to decent sexual chemistry if they're on the same page, and well... the rest is history

The goal isn't to make anyone cry - but if they can't handle some joking, such a turn-off for me.

And if you aren't comfortable with teasing - another good opener is asking a woman for an opinion - on anything.

 

[BC_Boy]

The key is to bust the balls of the 9's and the 10's. Complimenting their hair, their shoes, etc. is what every OTHER guy does. But if you tease a 9 or a 10, it rattles them a little. It takes them off their pedestal for a brief enough time to get past their built-up fortress. eg. You see a lady wearing those over-sized shades and you walk up to her and say something along the lines of : "Nice shades, I think my grandmother has a pair just like them!" and walk away.

In general I think it's a good test to see how they respond to teasing and sarcasm. It's amazing when you can banter with someone who has some backbone. Usually leads to decent sexual chemistry if they're on the same page, and well... the rest is history

The goal isn't to make anyone cry - but if they can't handle some joking, such a turn-off for me.

And if you aren't comfortable with teasing - another good opener is asking a woman for an opinion - on anything.

well said.

 

[InTheBum]

Try This One...

Hey girl, bend over, I'm horny!

 

[the_shogun]

Teasing the first day you meet her???? Uhhh, I donno bout that. Most people wait, and get to know a person first before the go into any type of teasing I would think!
I could be wrong, but EVERYONE is different!

well that's how i feel. now don't get me wrong, i tease all my friends, guys and girls, its a great way to keep things fun and fresh. however i feel that first impressions are usually the strongest and i usually keep the jokes to a minimum until i find out where the persons boundries are. then i'll know what i can and can't say.

 

[MrPeterNorth]

well that's how i feel. now don't get me wrong, i tease all my friends, guys and girls, its a great way to keep things fun and fresh. however i feel that first impressions are usually the strongest and i usually keep the jokes to a minimum until i find out where the persons boundries are. then i'll know what i can and can't say.

And that's the guaranteed way to stay in the "friends" zone forever. Unless of course that's what you prefer... I think teasing and being playful in general is what being 'human' is all about to be honest. Without that sort of instinct, we'd be nothing. And boring...

 

[kalel]

.

I just meant that teasing may not be the best on THE FIRST DAY. You dont know eachother well enough yet. Me and my dude tease all the time (actually i tease him a tad more) but anyhoo, it make us laugh, and we have fun, and most of the time we end the day with a bang becasue of the "touchy touchy" and the laughing cuddling, and . Dont take me for a shrewd!! LOL

you are entitled to your own opinion and i won't tell you that you're wrong. but in any given nite at a club setting or whatever do you want to spend 20 minutes getting to know all the potential bedmates or weed thru them fast and efficiently? women have tests they put men thru and the weak ones fail. well it's about time men played the same game. i'm guessing as a guy your goal is to find the one you're going home with and make sure she's hot. if she's sensitive, doesn't respond, has a boyfriend, doesn't find you funny there's only one solution - MOVE ON TO THE NEXT ONE! miss shay you mentioned that if a guy teased you or behaved like an asshole you'd pretty much tell him to fu** off. and that's your right, but many girls will respond to that. i'm personally against showering a girl with compliments because i don't beleive any woman should be put on a pedestal until she's proven that she's earned it. so the compliments come much later on down the road.

the whole concept of teasing comes from being different - if you see a hot girl who's had her ass kissed all nite long be the guy who tells her she looks fat in her jeans. she may call you an asshole but she'll still call you. and if she's insecure she'll probably be haunted by that comment enough to come talk to you and then you can tell her whether you meant it or not. warning: do not do this to girls with eating disorders. that's just mean.

 

[BC_Boy]

the whole concept of teasing comes from being different - if you see a hot girl who's had her ass kissed all nite long be the guy who tells her she looks fat in her jeans. she may call you an asshole but she'll still call you. and if she's insecure she'll probably be haunted by that comment enough to come talk to you and then you can tell her whether you meant it or not. warning: do not do this to girls with eating disorders. that's just mean.

im guessing this only works for the 8s, 9s and 10s?

on a related note, any find it difficult to conversate with anyone in a nightclub cause its too loud?

 

[Man Mountain]

i don't beleive any woman should be put on a pedestal

Really? Because I believe that a woman should be set on the highest pedestal ------- so you can look up her dress!

I can't take credit for that one. It's a slightly bastardized version of an old Steve Martin gag.

 

[Sir_frixalot]

I wish I had this when I was younger - David Deangelo's Double your Dating - book(s) and videos etc. Can find them for free out 'there'...

DD is a smart guy and teaches/coaches how to 'communicate' with a woman to reach her 'attraction program' - every woman is genetically programmed to be attracted to guys. She doesn't even know how it works herself - she is just attracted to certain behaviors that MOST guys DO NOT exhibit - unless they learn how.

Most guys use a logical approach - for example: treat her like a princess, compliment her - she has to love you right? Wrong, this does not work with women and especially will not attract one. DD is not a particularly good looking dude, but he has spent years watching successful guys, practicing and perfecting HOW it's done. Quite an eye-opener...

It's not the line, but the delivery that 'attracts' a woman to you. Just remember - COCKY and FUNNY - it is very hard to do - but at least you get an idea of WHAT to do - most of us are totally CLUELESS...

If a woman is truly 'attracted' to you, the sex is AMAZING...

 

[georgebushmoron]

What has worked with me countless times is not what I say, as a woman is typically on guard when you are a stranger, but to give her a feeling of warmth, openness, fun, compassion, and maybe a few words said in a prose like manner. All these things work together to give a feeling to her, one that let's her know you are human and genuine. I believe most women are not so much attracted to money or looks as they are attracted to personality and the vibes the man gives to her.