Sex therapist
- Thread starter chubbyguy
- Start date
Best I can offer is the maxim that the mind is the primary sex organ, and the corollary that the mind can be the biggest impediment to good sex.
Last time I... uh... needed a tune-up, I just arranged for someone to ... uh... spend the necessary time to gently convince/remind me that I am good in bed. The necessary time tends to be more than a couple of hours, by the way.
CaryGrant talked about about this a while ago.
https://perb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=13361
Last time I... uh... needed a tune-up, I just arranged for someone to ... uh... spend the necessary time to gently convince/remind me that I am good in bed. The necessary time tends to be more than a couple of hours, by the way.
CaryGrant talked about about this a while ago.
https://perb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=13361
Hey Chubby, I assume you have already been to a doctor but if not, I'd suggest that first. I'm sure a therapist would want to rule out anything physical first anyway. Then look in the yellow pages under Psychologists or maybe even your doctor can recommend one.
thanks for the input so far
I did ask a doctor a number of years ago but basically told to read a book she recommended. Sort of got the brush off I think. Mind you, this was over 10 yeags ago and I was too embarassed to follow up.
I don't have a doctor here in Edmonton yet but I guess that is the right place to start.
I did ask a doctor a number of years ago but basically told to read a book she recommended. Sort of got the brush off I think. Mind you, this was over 10 yeags ago and I was too embarassed to follow up.
I don't have a doctor here in Edmonton yet but I guess that is the right place to start.
The attitude and knowledge around ED has changed a LOT in the last 10 years. Get yourself a GP (not just a medicenter quack) and have a proper discussion on why you think you may be having performance problems. Is it an issue with a specific partners or everyone. Do you have other health problems like high blood pressure, diabetes, etc.chubbyguy said:
There's honestly no better advocate for your health then having a GP. They are a great resource to help you with day to day medical concerns like your ED and god forbid you encounter something more serious you're in a better position to get access to specialists and enhanced tests if you have a doc who knows your medical history.
Capital Health Authority, Physician Search
Best of luck!
I find doing jelqs and doing the flexing exercises helps alot in keeping hard. I did them for awhile and even at one point could do msog and keep hard enough to do 2-3 in a row with short breaks(minute or two) in between. Nowadays I'd need abit longer rest. Having a good cardiovascular system helps alot also because its easier for your body to free up the extra blood needed for an erection.
In addition to seeing a doctor...
You might want to find an SP who is willing to be patient, understanding and help you through it.
In my dating life and over the past year as an SP, I have run into many a man who has some kind of issue in this area from the occasional quick trigger to not being able to stay hard for longer than 30 seconds.
I think a lot of men get so nervous about "performing" that they can't focus on anything else. Being with someone who won't laugh, make jokes or pressure you would probably help.
I am sure there is someone in your area who can assist with this. The biggest thing to remember is take your time. If you lose an erection, the great thing is, you can get it back! Just relax, use your imagination, pleasure your partner and chill out about it.
Bella
You might want to find an SP who is willing to be patient, understanding and help you through it.
In my dating life and over the past year as an SP, I have run into many a man who has some kind of issue in this area from the occasional quick trigger to not being able to stay hard for longer than 30 seconds.
I think a lot of men get so nervous about "performing" that they can't focus on anything else. Being with someone who won't laugh, make jokes or pressure you would probably help.
I am sure there is someone in your area who can assist with this. The biggest thing to remember is take your time. If you lose an erection, the great thing is, you can get it back! Just relax, use your imagination, pleasure your partner and chill out about it.
Bella
Good answer gravitas!gravitas said:
chubbyguy, there are a LOT of reasons why you could be having this problem, including anti-depressant meds, and the doctor you saw was IGNORANT, and in fact, potentially very harmful to you! As gravitas pointed out, some serious health problems need to be checked into and ruled out first and foremost.
You can have diabetes or high blood pressure and not even know it. My mother was getting her blood pressure taken by the cuff at Shopper's for months and had no idea what the astronomical number meant until she told her doctor what it was and saw the shocked look on her face! A reading with the cuff in the exam room confirmed it.
I have a client with diabetes who can get it up and keep it up for what seems like ages and I can have a good, long, glorious ride on him and he can only lay there and watch me and enjoy me enjoying him and take my word for how hard he is—he can't feel a thing.
God, how I wish he could genuninely enjoy it as much as I do, but the diabetes has caused nerve damage—what a cruel disease!Get yourself to a qualified, competent physician ASAP! The longer you wait, the more risk of permanent damage being done if there is something serious causing this.
Thanks again all for the advice. I have been checking for a doctor near me but hard to find. I would prefer a female doctor (just feel more comfortable taking with a female about it). I have not found one yet but admit to not looking too hard for a couple weeks. I will get back on the search again soon. The advice and comments really make me want to check things out to make sure no other issuies (I have been checking blood pressure at the drug store and it is looking OK). Thanks again.
I just did and skimmed the top.chubbyguy said:
Sorry about that—I seem to have gotten really popular lately since I let my hair down and unleashed my personality in The Lounge. It's not intentional, it just happens. Unfortunately, it's always guys the in BC who get excited and I'm in Regina.
How flattering! Thank you!chubbyguy said:
I don't know what it is about my natural personality that men find so irresistable, but I can't say I mind the attention!
