Some great George Carlin Quotes....
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
If God had intended us not to masturbate he would've made our arms shorter.
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.
Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
Good bye George THANK YOU FOR THE LAUGHS
