Question for the working girls with boyfriends...

[gabrielle]

i'd also like to say...

that these are the views of my own, and i am a current SP. i'm not in any way disagreeing with anyone else's view...and would appreciate that my view is respected in the same way. i really don't understand why my view (taking quotes) or anyone else's needs to be attacked or questioned. this is how i see it, and thats that.

 

[gabrielle]

i love dulcinea!!

i want to eat her up!!!

 

[carynofwinnipeg]

What would you do if you found out your man paid and had sex with another working girl? While you were together. Just a question.

I don't work in the industry any longer............but if I was and found out he was hiring...........I'd go ballistic.

Caryn

 

[threepeat]

From the boyfriend's point of view

He's supposed to be okay with her job and support her choice...

its not an affair, its my current occupation. its how i pay my mortgage, feed myself, put clothes on my back, drive, and so forth. if my man can't accept that this is what i do for work, then he doesn't need to be my man.

...but then he's not supposed to be okay with it if he truly loves her...

furthermore...i do think that if my guy was ever okay with me doing this, that he doesn't love me like i deserve. i would never want someone i am in love with to do this for a living.

Not really picking on Gabrielle here, because I know other girls in the biz share this viewpoint as well. I guess I'm just pointing out that the guy is in a pretty shitty position as well. If the boyfriend keeps hearing "It's just a job, it's just a job" enough times, he'll probably eventually get it drilled into his head that hiring an SP is no different than hiring someone to wash his car.

 

[thebhc]

Some seem to missing the point.

thats why i don't have boyfriends!!!

This little line seems to have been overlooked by everyone. It seems clear to me that she clearly understands the no win situation that her occupation puts her in. As a result, she has taken it apon herself to sacrifice personnal companionship and happiness so that she can make money to acheive her future goals. So, let just accept the fact that these girls have self-respect (one of Gabrielle's best qualities) and won't let themselves be walk over. Trust me most of these girls deserve better than to make the sacrifices this industry demands to acheive their goals.

 

[gabrielle]

thanks for finally getting it!!

when i was saying that this is not an affair i'm having, blah, blah, its how i pay my bills...i was actually insulted that one would interpret my work as an affair. in no way am i emotionally attatched to my clientelle, other than friendship and a mutual respect. i provide a service with some humanity. i am paid for that service.

and yes, your damn rights (in my opinion) a guy should have a issue with his SO being in this business...and if he didn't, then i don't think that it is love. it should break his heart...whether she hates every moment or not.

that leads us to my final statement being that this is why i don't get myself into anything deep while i'm a working girl. it can't work. not in my eyes. what i need from a companion, i could never truely ask for nor expect.

it is a no win situation. its shitty, but that is a sacrifice i am more than willing to make for as long as i need to.

 

[trawler]

gabrielle ...

you are always a "breath of sanity" in a "world of rationalization".

It is so true that a long-term relationship is impossible to build with an SP who has no plan to leave the business. It is not just the sex that is an issue. It is the intimacy, health issues and lifestyle that really matter.

I think Girls who avoid S.O.'s while working are wise; those who have S.O.'s that know are ok in the short term and finally those who have S.O.'s that do not know will eventually get burnt.

My 2 cents from the other side of the fence.

 

[thebhc]

People to look up to

Wish we were all as wise as Gabrielle and Trawler

 

[wolverine]

Another issue with the SP and SO thing: if she doesn`t tell him what her real line of work is, it could lead to a very bad situation.

To wit:
https://perb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=40121

 

[Sixpak]

I just think that gabrielle is the coolest gal around!!!
There is no right answer though ... many will rationalize or generalize, but it totally comes down to the expectations of the relationship. No different than some marriages ... some partners cheat and are forgiven, some are killed!!!!

 

[SoftHandsAnne]

But you CAN have a true, loving relationship with an SP.

TJ in the 'Peg is in love with an SP and she is in love with him and we are both very damn happy about it thank you very much!

*Gets the warm squishies and a small glimmer of hope*

congrats!

 

[Tiffany]

I also agree...

It is possible to have a relationship as a sp. It's not easy, but then again what relationship is easy??

I have known many girls who were in this business that had SO's. They finally left the business and got married. They are still happily married.

All relationships have their problems regardless of what you do for a living. Although it may be much wiser to avoid relationships all together while in this line of work, sometimes the heart can't help what it feels. If you love someone, it doesn't matter what they do, you love them for who they are, not how they pay the bills.

You definately have to build your relationship on trust. Without trust it'll never work.

Tiff

 

[Racoon]

Naieve, I Guess

Question for the working girls with boyfriends...

What would you do if you found out your man paid and had sex with another working girl? While you were together. Just a question.

... been lurkin' for awhile but had to post to this one... had my first experience with an SP a year ago, not because my existing common-law relationship is not good but rather because I love women and I'm always horny... anyways, I thought that anybody who participates in this business would have to be the ultimate in terms of being non-judgemental which means that an SP MUST accept the fact that her partner might want some variety and the partner must accept the same...

 

[Gentleman First]

Playing the Devils Advocate here

If the Sp has sex for money, how is that different than the BF having sex for money?

Realistically, they are both doing the same thing.

Only time i could see it as a problem, would be if he spent so much money on the gals that they could barely survive.

My 2 cents

 

[Anna]

If the Sp has sex for money, how is that different than the BF having sex for money?

Realistically, they are both doing the same thing.

Only time i could see it as a problem, would be if he spent so much money on the gals that they could barely survive.

My 2 cents

lol.. agree with him..


Question for the working girls with boyfriends...

What would you do if you found out your man paid and had sex with another working girl? While you were together. Just a question.

I wouldnt mind atleast he is being HONEST, the key word!! *If he did it behind my back, I still wouldnt care cuz look what I do infront of him and behind his back, at time I feel sorry for him. Why stick with me if your unhappy about my situation? Some of my x's new and some didnt know.. There are alot of reasons why an Sp is in this situation.
Im a NYMPHO and I enjoy it plus other reasons, i will just leave it as that!!

 

[no-life-girl]

a way with words....

TJ in the 'Peg "But you CAN have a true, loving relationship with an SP.

In many ways it is no different than having a relationship with any other woman.If you can truly accept that being an SP is what they do, not who they are, that for them it is a job, it can work.

Yes, like any other job, some days they have a 'good day' at the office an enjoy themselves, but at the end of the day, it is you that they come home to and want to be with."



Very nicely put TJ. With support like that, she will be coming home to you everyday for a very long time. Good on you!!


To answer the question how would you feel if your SO paid for sex?

I have to say I'm such a hypocrit in that sense. I don't mean to be, I just can't help the way I feel. I'm a very jealous girl and even though it should be, "what's fair is NOT fair" to me. The way I look at it is, if I make sure to always give him what he needs in a sexual sense he shouldn't feel the need or want to pay for it. It would crush me in two ways if he did. First: My ego wouldn't be able to take the fact that I'm not satisfying him, which turns into number 2 Second: My profession. I would see it as, if I can't satisfy the one I love, how is it possible to satisfy clients? It's not!! (to crazy me, that is)

I know my way of thinking is crazy and unfair, and believe me when I say, I wish I didn't feel like this, I just can't help it. And, if it did happen, I wouldn't break up with him or be mad, just be very sad at the thought I wasn't doing it for him.

 

[ihatemyskirt]

Yeah I agree with you most of all girl.

 

[Silver Surfer]

Imho

What would you do if you found out your man paid and had sex with another working girl? While you were together. Just a question.

Perhaps he just wanted to see what other men found in being with a SP.

There are too may variables in the human heart to judge at this point. If he comes back great. If not, hunt him down and beat him like the dog that he is!

SS

 

[hardup]

I've had friendships with several SP's and had one shortlived but extremely hot relationship with a boardmember here and no matter how "openminded" you are it get's in the way. The more your feelings grow the more it get's in the way. Not just from my point of view either. As we got closer the less she would want to work, standing up clients etc. For her the money was addictive and for me what started as smugness(you're paying for what I get for free) turned into resentment.
I'm not saying it can't work but I am saying it's hard work that requires the kind of detachment that would make a Doctor shudder.

 

[Racoon]

Right On!

I've had friendships with several SP's and had one shortlived but extremely hot relationship with a boardmember here and no matter how "openminded" you are it get's in the way. The more your feelings grow the more it get's in the way. Not just from my point of view either. As we got closer the less she would want to work, standing up clients etc. For her the money was addictive and for me what started as smugness(you're paying for what I get for free) turned into resentment.
I'm not saying it can't work but I am saying it's hard work that requires the kind of detachment that would make a Doctor shudder.

I couldn't have said it better Hardup!!!