Question for all SPs

[FortunateOne]

many guys obviously do feel safe having sex with an sp- just look at this board-

I'm with susi here. Considering the vast number of guys who prefer to have bbbjs, dfk, daty, dato, showers, etc etc with sps, they must feel safer with an sp than any other woman, especially considering how many men daily/weekly/monthly she does all that with.

So, an sp is safe to do all that with if you pay her, but not if you date her, I guess.

 

[mimi]

I quit the business to marry and raise kids. I was honest before I married, but, it bothered him so much, he's so sensitive, that I retracted and told him it was just to see if he REALLY loved me...stupid, but I was young, and I think he knew what the truth was he just wanted to hear the truth he liked better...make sense?

Went back into the business when the marriage fell apart, (actually started driving escorts 'cause I thought I was too old at 35, but, there is a niche for everyone)...anyway, quit for a client I fell for cause he couldn't share me with anyone else. That relationship ended.

I am over the "marriage" hump at 48 yrs and I'm happy to have nice relationships with my clients, it's like having several 'easy care' husbands instead of one really, needy, demanding one. My clients know I have other clients but, they all pretend they're the only ones!

I find it more difficult to keep it from my friends and family. I am proud of what I do. I work as hard as a psychologist, nurse, teacher, or pastor and yet it is a part of my life I need to keep invisible. No company picnics.

An old Madame once said "It isn't the drugs and the disease that kills a whore it's the loneliness..." And I have noticed that you can be a reformed murderer or rapist or pedophile and a church anywhere will accept you, just don't be a prostitute.

When I bump into other old whores, and I mean complete strangers, (we seem to sense our kindred spirits, very uncanny) we can enjoy a coffee and stimulating conversation punctuated by misty tears about the 'good ole days'; it is a time to be truly and honestly ourselves (most of these women have moved on, but, really miss their work)

Anyway, I think I may be guilty of hijacking the thread..honesty is the best policy. (Wouldn't it be great if once a year there was a big 'Hookers Ball'? Like a fetish thing, around Xmas when the clients are busy being good boys with their wives and kids?)

 

[Harmony-bc]

(Wouldn't it be great if once a year there was a big 'Hookers Ball'? Like a fetish thing, around Xmas when the clients are busy being good boys with their wives and kids?)[/QUOTE]

I'd go and I'd drag friends with me, it would be a blast! I'd even dress up in my best ho gear. whoohooo

 

[trackstar]

Only a select few of my personal friends know what I do because after Chantel died, they knew she was an SP and kind of figured it out with my night time comings and goings.

Anyone I date does NOT know. I dated a guy for a year and when I was working at Penthouse, he wanted to drive me to work so I told him to drop me off at Sobey's cos i was getting food for everyone lol. We broke up (no sex) and he still doesnt know to this day.

I usually have another part time job as a cover, right now, waitressing, so I don't have to explain the late hours. Sometimes they ask where I get my money from, I say I get tipped well or it's from my parents.

I don't have a second apartment nor a second cell phone yet so I don't have to explain that. The condoms and lube I hide.

I only ever had one lover who knew. He was from my game and is a stereotypical gamer who is really sheltered. Even though I told him I was an SP and worked at an MP he didn't know we had sex because once he asked me. "Do any of the girls ever have sex there if they like the client?" I gave him the weirdest look and hugged him for being so naive lol.

So when do you tell him? When he falls head over heels for you, then take the chance of ripping his heart out of his chest? Or do you still continue hiding it, tempting fate that he will find out on his own by accident? Then rip his heart out of his chest? Or tempt fate again that he doesn't go postal?

If a guy was married without your knowledge and you were dating him, I'm guessing that you would want to know so that you can make your own choice before you became emotionally attached?

I think it's pretty cruel of you for not giving men that date you the choice of being in a relationship with you (or not) when you are prostituting. I can only imagine that someday your deceptions will come back to kick you square in the ass.

 

[ChineseDude]

So when do you tell him? When he falls head over heels for you, then take the chance of ripping his heart out of his chest? Or do you still continue hiding it, tempting fate that he will find out on his own by accident? Then rip his heart out of his chest? Or tempt fate again that he doesn't go postal?

If a guy was married without your knowledge and you were dating him, I'm guessing that you would want to know so that you can make your own choice before you became emotionally attached?

I think it's pretty cruel of you for not giving men that date you the choice of being in a relationship with you (or not) when you are prostituting. I can only imagine that someday your deceptions will come back to kick you square in the ass.

I can relate to that. Moi is Asian. Assuming her dating partners are Asian too. No Asian men in the right mind can deal with a girlfriend prostituting herself. No matter how liberal and white-washed he is, he cannot take it. Maybe some can take a girlfriend that was once a prostitute but I doubt it's easy.

White girls have it easy, their wild side is much more appealing in Western values, she can say "I am doing this because I love my job pleasuring men."
And white men would buy it totally.
No, Asian girls can't go like that. The Asian men would go "You whore."

She got problems if she hides it forever, but I doubt thats the case. I am assuming she had no sex with any of her dates, and would decide to tell them after any penetration.

I am not trying to cause racial tension here, but you must understand, for Asians, its not about fucking after the first few dates. Asians love to test guys out for a few times before she is ready for reproduction.

 

[Harmony-bc]

Interesting. Last time I looked in the mirror, I was Asian and I was born in Korea. As far as I know, my Korean blood line goes back thousands of years (and many more eons as Mongolian before that) and I for one would be understanding if a girl told me she worked as a prostitute. However, if she lied about it or anything else, I would not be so indulgent. But maybe I've turned white since this morning and I just haven't realized it yet. I better make sure I haven't gone Michael Jackson on y'all without realizing it...brb.

You are super sweet and super funny too.! lol

 

[A.U.D.R.E.Y]

I realize this question is a little more personal, but i'm extremely curious to find out the answers,it effects my life dirrectly.

How many of you have boyfriends or husbands that know the details of what you do...or are they just told of a different ocupation completly?

I totally appreciate any feedback it means a lot to me.

Thanks Ladies

I had pretty much given up hope of finding someone while working as an SP.

I've had a few failed attempts in the past (they all knew), & was not in any way looking to try it again.

I ended up finding my soul mate a few months ago & our relationship is pretty amazing.

He knows what I do, supports me in my decision to be an Sp (as long as I am being safe), we share a love of the review boards, his whole family knows & loves me, my family does as well.

I feel pretty lucky to have found it & am thankful for the honesty I am able to have in my personal life .

 

[trackstar]

I had pretty much given up hope of finding someone while working as an SP.

I've had a few failed attempts in the past (they all knew), & was not in any way looking to try it again.

I ended up finding my soul mate a few months ago & our relationship is pretty amazing.

He knows what I do, supports me in my decision to be an Sp (as long as I am being safe), we share a love of the review boards, his whole family knows & loves me, my family does as well.

I feel pretty lucky to have found it & am thankful for the honesty I am able to have in my personal life .

See what happens when you're HONEST! But then again, you are a white girl Good for you and good luck Audrey

 

[ChineseDude]

Interesting. Last time I looked in the mirror, I was Asian and I was born in Korea. As far as I know, my Korean blood line goes back thousands of years (and many more eons as Mongolian before that) and I for one would be understanding if a girl told me she worked as a prostitute. However, if she lied about it or anything else, I would not be so indulgent. But maybe I've turned white since this morning and I just haven't realized it yet. I better make sure I haven't gone Michael Jackson on y'all without realizing it...brb.

Put yourself in the situation, you're dating the chick, trying to make a move on her. Suddenly, she says "I am a massage girl." Then you get all turned off by her whoring around. You think "Ah, fuck it, easier to cut it off now than later." And you stop talking to her.

Meanwhile, if she tells you after fucking her a few times, it'd be like this. "I worked as a Prostitute in an MP." Guy gets choked for a while, leaves her. After a while, his horniness allows him to go find in the MP. Shit, thats his first time pooning. And they get back together, fuck, happy ending.

Truth is, she haven't fucked any of the guys she dated, so she feels no emotional attachment from the guys. She is scared that being honest will scare them away. The gamer on the other hand, is probably her play thing, so it doesn't matter much. Again I am only assuming. Need her to make confirmation.

 

[sinfulsydnee]

funny...

as long as she sucks good cock, that's all that matters!

That's exactly what my husband says!! We have been married 19 years and he is the one who encouraged me to finally play out this fantasy...who knew it would become my life's passion?? Interestingly, this is the one subject we don't argue about...with the exception of the vast number of shoes and boots I purchase...Honey really, I simply MUST have these ones!!

 

[HB40]

I only ever had one lover who knew. He was from my game and is a stereotypical gamer who is really sheltered. Even though I told him I was an SP and worked at an MP he didn't know we had sex because once he asked me. "Do any of the girls ever have sex there if they like the client?" I gave him the weirdest look and hugged him for being so naive lol.

I think that is so cool, any guy would be lucky to have you as a girlfriend moi.

So when do you tell him? When he falls head over heels for you, then take the chance of ripping his heart out of his chest? Or do you still continue hiding it, tempting fate that he will find out on his own by accident? Then rip his heart out of his chest? Or tempt fate again that he doesn't go postal?

TS, what’s with you man? Dating surely must be a bitch and she’s not likely to find her soul mate on the first time out.
You were quick to applaud A.U.D.R.EY. yet she made no mention of when she told her suitor what her profession was.
There is always a feeling out process during courtship, I’m sure it would take a gal several dates before she realizes you’re a whoremonger….
oh sorry, you just get that out of the way on the first session.

 

[kalel]

i think with what's discussed on this board everybody is jaded into thinking that the number of sexual partners is not as relevent to most people, but outside this board i think it is. i know alot of guys and girls who would be taken back if they knew their partner had been with many many people. it's a hard concept to overcome for many people.

 

[melissa.in.abby]

i think with what's discussed on this board everybody is jaded into thinking that the number of sexual partners is not as relevent to most people, but outside this board i think it is. i know alot of guys and girls who would be taken back if they knew their partner had been with many many people. it's a hard concept to overcome for many people.

I personally wouldn't bother being with someone unless they were right for me, and something I need in a relationship is honesty, and acceptance. Just because one man wouldn't accept doesn't mean another won't.

 

[A.U.D.R.E.Y]

I think that is so cool, any guy would be lucky to have you as a girlfriend moi.

TS, what’s with you man? Dating surely must be a bitch and she’s not likely to find her soul mate on the first time out.
You were quick to applaud A.U.D.R.EY. yet she made no mention of when she told her suitor what her profession was.
There is always a feeling out process during courtship, I’m sure it would take a gal several dates before she realizes you’re a whoremonger….
oh sorry, you just get that out of the way on the first session.

My 2 past serious relationships were with former clients.

My SO is a retired hobbyist who was never my client.

They all knew what they were getting themselves into before we started dating .

Hope that clarifies things .

 

[little Cowboy]

Its a tough question to answer, until you are actually faced with the situation.

I think that the stronger the love for the lady, the more tolerant one would be. Particularly if you met her as an SP. It does change things though if you are dating and she tells you after the fact, that could be tough to take, hopefully after a bit you'd be able to discuss this and sort it out.

I'd like to think that I am secure enough to accept it, but I don't know and won't til I've been in the situation. I would think that I can accept it more now than I could when I was younger.

But, I know one thing, I would never ask her to quit. That isn't right. Its a decision she would have to make. It seems to me that asking her to change is placing conditions on my love.

Sure I can say something like " I wish that I didn't have to share you" as I should be honest about my feelings with her as well. And she then has the information to decide. Perhaps, just discussing it may be sufficient to reassure both of us...because in the end it still is a joint venture, whether we know it or not, because ..

1) her job affects me as my job affects her

2) What happens if one of her clients, is a person that I deal with...

There have been examples here on PERB where a client shows up, and 'sees' the daughter of a friend of his...and was uncertain as to whether or not to let the friend know.

What if your boss or business associate sees your 'girl' and then at the company Xmas party sees that she is your SO. What if your Boss thinks you don't know what she does and feels compelled to tell you? How do you deal with that?

Not that its a large problem, but its part of the things you'll need to have discussed before hand.

Ohhh what a web we weave, when we attempt to deceive..