PTSD & SP workers

ryan24

New member
Nov 12, 2006
8
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0
Saskatchewan
hey everyone,

i've been working on a paper with the subject matter being PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and i've come across some findings stating that many sexually abused children with PTSD end up becoming escorts or prostitutes when they grow up. i wanted to find out from the male and female SP's here, if perhaps this matches their experience. of course this information is kept private and no names or personal information will be given out. if you're willing to share, i'd love to hear about it to confirm these statistics. please feel free to pm me, post here, or e-mail me
[email protected].

thanx!!

ryan
 

Victoria Rose

Sexy Little Thing...
Apr 28, 2006
211
0
0
Regina
ryan24 said:
hey everyone,

i've been working on a paper with the subject matter being PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and i've come across some findings stating that many sexually abused children with PTSD end up becoming escorts or prostitutes when they grow up. i wanted to find out from the male and female SP's here, if perhaps this matches their experience. of course this information is kept private and no names or personal information will be given out. if you're willing to share, i'd love to hear about it to confirm these statistics. please feel free to pm me, post here, or e-mail me
[email protected].
I was never sexually abused as a child and I didn't even consider becoming an SP until I was 35 and found myself suddenly unemployed with children to support without enough coming in from EI to support them. Then my work as an SP was only brief—3 months—long enough for me to find other work.

I took up being an independent SP again five years later due to financial pressures and I still do it part time because I enjoy the work.

Nothing whatsoever to do with PTSD or my childhood. I'm far happier being a single SP than married and miserable.

It takes care of my sexual and financial desires, men tell me I'm beautiful all the time, I have control of my life—why do you think people do this for a bad reason?

I'm sure there was a thread on this before and the conclusion was that none of the SPs here do this because of some kind of psychopathology, especially any orginating in their childhood.

Bottom line: you're wasting your time if you think you're going to find people here to confirm those statistics. You might have better luck if you solicited church groups or advertised in the local paper, but most of the people you'll find that way have a very unhealthy attitude towards what we do, and they're probably among those who contributed to those silly (and for the most part, highly exaggerated or falsified) statistics you're trying to verify.

Contrary to what the media and reports published by religious groups would have you believe, the vast majority of SPs are not the victims that the misguided people outside of the escort industry make us out to be in their efforts to denigrate this industry.
 

ryan24

New member
Nov 12, 2006
8
0
0
Saskatchewan
Thankyou Victoria Rose and jjinvan. I do appreciate your comments, and by no means am I trying to state that this is the cause for the career as a SP provider. It is simply something I read in my literature and psych-articles that I became curious about while studying this aspect of PTSD.

I know for a fact that many SP workers do enjoy their work, and choose to do it out of their own freedom. For this I am truly appreciative, because I have had my share of wonderful experiences.

As for the website and form to submit, it had crossed my mind but I don't have the resources and skill to create such a thing. I understand the need for anonymity, and can appreciate a persons hesitation to reply to this thread. This thread just came up out of curiosity to what I had read.
 

LonelyGhost

Telefunkin
Apr 26, 2004
3,935
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you might be better off reading outside your 'discipline', particularly
in the area of 'governing morals', where you will find lots of critical
work on how sex and sexuality are regulated by psychology/psychiatry.

one good read is "Madness and Civilization" by Michel Foucault ... this book
sent shock-waves through psychiatry when it came out and still pisses
the profession off whenever its mentioned.

I think that the 'thesis' that the only way a woman could become a
sex trade worker is through a traumatic event (documented by a
psychiatric evaluation and diagnosis of PTSD) is really just another means
of (de)moralizing/valuing women's sexuality.
 

roughrider1001

New member
Nov 24, 2006
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0
Actually ryan your correct Most women in this buisness while they will admit it or not do have issues. I have run escort services for years and although there are a few who just like to freak off many of these young ladies are searching for a sense of belonging and love they never had, Thats why many madames are surragate moms. Look for my email in your gmaL
 

Victoria Rose

Sexy Little Thing...
Apr 28, 2006
211
0
0
Regina
LonelyGhost said:
I think that the 'thesis' that the only way a woman could become a sex trade worker is through a traumatic event (documented by a psychiatric evaluation and diagnosis of PTSD) is really just another means of (de)moralizing/valuing women's sexuality.
I agree, but you'd be surprised how many women will use that (and make something up, if need be) as a convenient excuse for their foray into the sex trade when confronted by a judgmental friend or family member, seeking sympathy in a church after being "converted," or trying to win over a potential mate among those men who can't and won't accept their past.

If society as a whole weren't so devaluing and denigrating of women's sexuality in the first place, no one, whether in the in the field of psychology/psychiatry or not, would feel a need to relate women's presence in the sex trade with PTSD or child sexual abuse. Society looks for ways to make womankind the victim and remove responsibility for her behaviour from her own control.

"The poor, dear creature. Well, she is one of the 'weaker sex' after all, she doesn't know any better. It's up to the rest of us to save her from herself."

It's a great way to keep women from having any sense of power or self-esteem too, because if you don't have to feel responsible for your behaviour, you don't have a sense of empowerment, and without that sense of empowerment, you have no basis for positive self-esteem. What motivation does one have to feel good about themself if they feel that they're always a victim and have no control over their life?

Too any of us buy into it because sympathy is very seductive when you haven't had a perfect life, but if you buy into it too much, you end up feeling powerless to make things better in your life and stuck in a miserable rut because of it. Which makes a woman ripe for being "rescued" by that proverbial "knight in shining armour" who often ends up treating her like dirt because she's dependent on him and that makes him feel a sense of power over her to do whatever he wants to her. And no one genuinely respects someone they have that much power over.

It's not just about sex, it's about power. A woman's sexuality is her power and that's why it's always being devalued by society. Society can keep women weak if they can make her sexuality shameful or the result of some terrible misfortune that wasn't her fault.

Obviously, society still feels threatened by the notion that women are sexual beings too.
 

LonelyGhost

Telefunkin
Apr 26, 2004
3,935
0
0
Victoria Rose said:
I agree, but you'd be surprised how many women will use that (and make something up, if need be) as a convenient excuse for their foray into the sex trade
exactly ... what else can they say? "Hey mom, I love fucking! and get
paid for doing it too!" ????

this is the problem with moralizing 'sex' and 'sexuality' -- we don't give
anyone the opportunity to simply express themselves except through
an extremely narrow social concept.

that's also one reason to take the 'stats' on PSTD and sexual abuse
among sex trade workers with some 'caution' -- its not that some haven't
been abused (or many) but the only 'acceptable' reason for becoming
a sex trade worker IS because of such abuse: so a woman who has
sex for money is thus given a dichotomy of either being a victim or a slut.

nice choices.
 

shedevil

Banned
Jul 19, 2005
1,098
0
0
A SAVAGE LUST GARDEN
LonelyGhost said:
the only 'acceptable' reason for becoming
a sex trade worker IS because of such abuse: so a woman who has
sex for money is thus given a dichotomy of either being a victim or a slut.

nice choices.
I couldn't agree more.

I didn't start because of past circumstances. The reasons I started in this business is because I had to have 2 very invasive surgeries and couldn't work a regular job and pay for all of my expenses. Nothing more. The bonus is that I love sex.

I have never considered myself a victim, or a slut.

You are only a victim if you choose to be. ( In most cases) That's my mindset about it.

I had one serious BF, and a total of 5 sex partners before I started.

SD
 

Victoria Rose

Sexy Little Thing...
Apr 28, 2006
211
0
0
Regina
LonelyGhost said:
exactly ... what else can they say? "Hey mom, I love fucking! and get paid for doing it too!" ????
Well, my mom doesn't know that I'm an escort now—she only knows about the first time when I was 35, no thanks to a very ignorant and indiscreet former best friend.

We never talked about why I did it then. She just assumed I was desperate for money, and that was at least partly true at the time, but my financial crisis ended long before I left the business back then—and I was only in it for three months. And during what brief mention there ever was between us about the characteristics of my clientele, my mother made it clear that she thinks that all men who patronize this industry are the kind of sick, crazed, demoralized degenerates who have sex with children and animals and jack off on street corners while drooling uncontrollably, and should be locked up forever some place where no one has to deal with them.

It's so flattering to know that my mother thinks that I willingly had/have sex for money with such creatures—NOT! :rolleyes:

Would she suspect that I enjoy sex? I don't know. I only know that she gets very uncomfortable and demands that we change the subject if I try to talk frankly about sex in any context with her.

Suffice it to say that I have a much healthier attitude towards sexuality than my mother ever has, or ever will, and I'm far less judgmental about people.

And if she finds out that I'm doing this again and doesn't like it, then she'll have to decide if she feels that it's upsetting enough to her to end our mother-daughter relationship over, because I'm not going to stop doing it to please her and she'll be told that if she tries to push her opinions on me.

But when you get right down to it, I don't have to explain why I work as an escort to her, or anyone else for that matter. I do it because I choose to and it's my body and I can do anything with it that I choose to.
 

expedition

New member
Mar 12, 2006
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Victoria Rose said:
she thinks that all men who patronize this industry are the kind of sick, crazed, demoralized degenerates who have sex with children and animals and jack off on street corners while drooling uncontrollably, and should be locked up forever some place where no one has to deal with them.
I find it very telling that while a great deal of effort is spent trying to find out why women would become escorts, almost no effort is devoted to explaining why men would be customers. Anyone sincerely interested in a non-judgmental understanding of the business would devote at least as much effot to the male's motivations as the females ... probably more, since there are many more clients than providers.
 

BLT

New member
Sep 15, 2006
36
0
0
LonelyGhost said:
you might be better off reading outside your 'discipline', particularly
in the area of 'governing morals', where you will find lots of critical
work on how sex and sexuality are regulated by psychology/psychiatry.

one good read is "Madness and Civilization" by Michel Foucault ... this book
sent shock-waves through psychiatry when it came out and still pisses
the profession off whenever its mentioned.

I think that the 'thesis' that the only way a woman could become a
sex trade worker is through a traumatic event (documented by a
psychiatric evaluation and diagnosis of PTSD) is really just another means
of (de)moralizing/valuing women's sexuality.
1. he didn't state that "the only way a woman could become a
sex trade worker is through a traumatic event"

2. reading foucault (which he probably did, as pretty much everyone else in post-secondary education) will not help him write a paper about post-traumatic stress disorder in sps
 

BLT

New member
Sep 15, 2006
36
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0
expedition said:
I find it very telling that while a great deal of effort is spent trying to find out why women would become escorts, almost no effort is devoted to explaining why men would be customers. Anyone sincerely interested in a non-judgmental understanding of the business would devote at least as much effot to the male's motivations as the females ... probably more, since there are many more clients than providers.
there you certainly have a point, if you consider 'mainstream' media and society - but i am not so sure if it is correct that there are no, or less studies on the motivation of customers.
but as i said, i don't know for sure.
 

Victoria Rose

Sexy Little Thing...
Apr 28, 2006
211
0
0
Regina
expedition said:
I find it very telling that while a great deal of effort is spent trying to find out why women would become escorts, almost no effort is devoted to explaining why men would be customers. Anyone sincerely interested in a non-judgmental understanding of the business would devote at least as much effot to the male's motivations as the females ... probably more, since there are many more clients than providers.
I agree 100% with you, but when you're dealing with someone like my mother, you can't get through to them on this subject. Her mind on things like this is as closed as a steel trap, but in her case, it's rusted shut and can't be opened. Trust me on this, I've tried. She won't hear anything different from that which "jives" with her own value system (which is about 50 yrs old—and she's only 60).

She's very racist too, and her mind is just as closed on that subject. The only way I can have a relationship with my mother at all is to avoid the subjects we disagree on, otherwise we'll end up in a knock-down, drag-out fight. It's a wonder that we still find anything to talk about, but obviously we do because I have a long distance plan primarily because of her, and I can't call her unless I have at least the two hours free.

Generally speaking, I avoid people like my mother at all costs. However, she is my mother and I love her anyway—even if she can drive me crazy with relatively little effort. :rolleyes:
 

LonelyGhost

Telefunkin
Apr 26, 2004
3,935
0
0
BLT said:
1. he didn't state that "the only way a woman could become a
sex trade worker is through a traumatic event"
he states:
ryan24 said:
i've been working on a paper with the subject matter being PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) and i've come across some findings stating that many sexually abused children with PTSD end up becoming escorts or prostitutes when they grow up.
which seems to suggest that the thesis of his paper is PSTD = prostitution... there are other 'theories' but he doesn't state them.


BLT said:
2. reading foucault (which he probably did, as pretty much everyone else in post-secondary education) will not help him write a paper about post-traumatic stress disorder in sps
no, but it might make him realize that there is more to the diagnosis
of an 'illness' than he might imagine. the whole idea of requiring some
'explanation' for women's sexuality is rather suspect for any discipline.
and while 'many' people have read Foucault, this guy doesn't seem to
have bothered or he wouldn't have posted this question in the first place.
 
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