Premature ejaculation.

[Massagegirl]

I was approached by a friend about this problem he has always had, but I am not sure premature ejaculation is the name for it, and without the name I can't look up the cure.

He said he gets hard, feels a buildup that spreads thriough his abdomen then ejaculates WITHOUT orgasm. I am wondering if the buildup is the orgasm and maybe he expected something better. He is only 24 and in good health.

I told him about the prostate massage, and how it is supposed to be the best orgasm possible. I know it is the cure for not being able to cum but don't know whether it will help or not, as it does make a regular normal orgasm pale by comparison.

I would appreciate any advice but I realize it may be something noone wants to admit to so I will do a poll. (I love polls.)

*Please answer one of the top three, then one of the last 2. Thanks, I am really trying to find out if this is a bigger problem as I sometimes have clients who are sooo quiet when they release.

 

[Maury Beniowski]

Tell your friend to enjoy what he has, even if it doesn't fit the norm. A lot of men suffer quite the opposite, and wish they were in his shoes. He'll find his milieu eventually and will get over the anxiety reflex he experiences now. It takes time and familiarity.

 

[zlmmm]

I can't imagine any ejaculation in quantity to be anything but an orgasm. The buildup sounds completely normal to me as well. If the duration of the buildup is very short then it sounds like premature ejaculation.

Perhaps he just needs a patient woman to go very slow with him and keep backing off to allow him to experience a prolonged buildup (if that is indeed the case).

As for the prostrate rub, it is bound to produce an even more powerful orgasm, provided he does not have any mental hangups about stimulation there, but it also might even be too much stimulation for him at this point.

 

[Maury Beniowski]

My understanding is that premature ejaculation is when a man ejacualtes too soon, without control. (and from my experience, it's very common.....but that's what the second round is about right?!?)

And isn't ejacualtion an orgasm for a man? (although I think through kamasutra a man can learn to orgasm without ejaculation)

oui? non?

Premature means having it occur almost involuntarily, or not when you would prefer it to. Yes, it is common particularily, but not limited to younger less experienced males. And no, that may be what the second round may be for some, but the second round is just a normal (I hate that term) re-stimulation. When I was younger, I could easily repeat within the hour, and went for one marathon session 14 times in a 24-hour period. Mind you, many of those were trickles, but the feeling and the ejaculation were there.

Ejaculation is a physical response. However orgasm, is the same as it is for women. It is a nervous system (read electrifying) stimulus, with a very large mental component attached. In fact, the mental component is arguably, the biggest trigger.

"Kama" means pleasure or sensual desire. It is the name of the Indian God that represents the sexual nature in man. "Sutra" means short books or aphorisms.

For more info on Kama Sutra, click here.

 

[OTR2]

I was approached by a friend about this problem he has always had...

What better way to put his mind at ease than for your friend to get medical advice from a bunch of PERBerts. Call me crazy, and no offence to MassageGirl, but uh, I'd be asking my doctor. Good opportunity to mooch more sample packs of Viagara anyways.

 

[_Ruffian_]

He said he gets hard, feels a buildup that spreads thriough his abdomen then ejaculates WITHOUT orgasm.

hmm, i wonder if people have problems with not ejaculating at all, yet still having orgasms?

 

[Massagegirl]

Re: Re: Premature ejaculation.

What better way to put his mind at ease than for your friend to get medical advice from a bunch of PERBerts. Call me crazy, and no offence to MassageGirl, but uh, I'd be asking my doctor.

Actually I am regarded as a bit of a sexpert by my friends, seeing as they're all straight laced...

If you went to a doctor about not being able to ejaculate, the GP would put on a glove with some KY jelly and tell you to bend over. Then he would manually "milk" the prostate until the seminal tubes started to flow again. In essense, unplug you and make you cum (without ever touching your cock.)

Now, wouldn't it be better if it was a female and there was also cock and ball action?? It is supposed to be the best/most intense orgasm possible. I have personally done the prostate massage and fixed several people who could orgasm without achieving an ejaculation.

BUt I hesitate to think that same treatment would work for premature ejaculation. It may, thats why I am getting the most amount of information I can before I do further research.

 

[LonelyGhost]

nope, it won't ... you (or he) has to use the stop and go method: simply put, stimulate until he feels something - anything and stop. then using two fingers, squeeze just below the glans ... not to strangle it or cause pain, but to just stop the sensation.

repeat and repeat and repeat.

the additional thing is to have him do kegels ... these strengthen the muscles that assist in ejaculation and as they get stronger they send back more signals saying that they are ready to go and that becomes the signal to stop.

the thing with PE is that the guy has lost (or never had) the ability to determine where the 'point-of-no-return' is and passes it by and yahoo-damn its all over. it takes a lot of patience and work to stop PE but it can be done.

 

[5punki]

My understanding is that premature ejaculation is when a man ejacualtes too soon, without control. (and from my experience, it's very common.....but that's what the second round is about right?!?)

And isn't ejacualtion an orgasm for a man? (although I think through kamasutra a man can learn to orgasm without ejaculation)

oui? non?

No Ingrid, ejaculation for a man is not necesarily an orgasm.

Dictionary def : The peak of sexual excitement, characterized by strong feelings of pleasure and by a series of involuntary contractions of the muscles of the genitals, usually accompanied by the ejaculation of semen by the male. Also called climax.

I can have sex without orgasm.. the ejaculation feels good. Just being able to release but when I'm making love for an extended period of time or just really enjoying who i'm with I have the most intense feeling of satisfaction, "the peak" if you will and it feels so much different than just lettin the nut butter out.

I think i can understand Massagegirl what your friend is saying. I'm not really sure i can help but there have been times where I ejaculate without much feeling...the release doesnt feel satisfying at all. I can feel the buildup like your friend.. and.. poof ooh.. i'm finished. I personally think it might be a more emotional state than physical. Dont write me up on that though, i'm no doctor. But i've found when and if those times happend to me my mind wasn't really as into the sexual act as maybe when i started. Maybe my mind drifted a bit subconsciously... not sure what exactly causes it but i can see how it would be frustrating for your friend. I am only 1 year his senior so my experience isn't really that much greater. THere are others on here much more experienced than I

 

[OTR2]

......there have been times where I ejaculate without much feeling...the release doesnt feel satisfying at all. [/B]

Ejaculation without much feeling and not satisfying at all...you must have had sex with my x wife too!

 

[Fudd]

"I told him about the prostate massage, and how it is supposed to be the best orgasm possible."

What's this prostate massage??

 

[Massagegirl]

Prostate massage

If you went to a doctor about not being able to ejaculate, the GP would put on a glove with some KY jelly and tell you to bend over. Then he would (insert his finger in yer bum)) and manually "milk"(gently stoke) the prostate until the seminal tubes started to flow again. In essense, unplug you and make you cum (without ever touching your cock.)

The prostate massage is also called milking the prostrate. Usually Doctors do it as I said, but I read how to do it in a "Men's Sex" limited edition put out by Mens Health Magazine. I was perusing the whole thing but came across "the biggest orgasm humanly possible" and thought to myself "I'm gonna be rich!" Lol. It was a real craze a few years ago, (I don't know if I started it) as men began to realize it felt great and didn't make them gay.

It doen't feel like much at first then slowly an incredible, some say overwhelming, orgasm builds and a scream/moan usually escapes along with some blind flailing and back arching before they collapse. Afterwards I usually ask if it was ok, was there any pain or discomfiture etc, and the answer is always no. But they also describe it as weird and later become addicted and semi-complain that regular orgasms don't cut it anymore. So sad, mwahaha, everything is going according to my evil plan...

 

[Massagegirl]

Thanks everyone for your help!

I saw my friend tonight and recommended the technique for having multiple orgasms. I believe a few people mentioned the practice of wackin until you think you might cum, then holding back and allowing yourself to go flacid before starting again, then repeating. The theory is being able to go longer each time, before ejaculating. I guess it also leads to multiple orgasms but this guy would be happy just to have one really good one!!! I told him to get back to me if it works, I know his GF arrives in a few days after a long absence so he should have plenty of practice.

I enjoyed this little science project, and thank you all, for your insight. It lead to the correct advice I think. Maybe a career for me, since I do have a resource base of free test subjects, lol, namely you guys. I will come back to this thread if it doesn't solve his problem. I think the next step would be teaching his GF the prostate massage.

Anyone else, please feel free to comment still!

PS only 14 of you voted?

 

[5punki]

Ejaculation without much feeling and not satisfying at all...you must have had sex with my x wife too!

LMAO.. hahaha