Carman Fox

math lesson from the VPD

pussy420

New member
Jan 3, 2005
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I was down in Van last year, probably around March, visiting a friend.

We decided to go downtown along hastings to find some nose candy. As neither of us partake in this activity regularly, we figured we'd be able to find some by talking to a few of the locals.

We turned right off Hastings (can't recall the street) and pulled over to talk to a very heinous looking SW. She gave us no specifics but told us to, "trust the Spanish."

It was about this time in my rear view mirror I saw a marked cruiser turn down the same street heading toward us. I immediatley pulled away from the curb and pulled out in front of him. We stopped at a stop sign, and proceeded to turn onto a very busy street (again, I don't know the name).

The officer turned right too, and caught up to us quickly. He pulled even with us, looked inside, fell back and turned on his lights. "Are those for us," my friend asked. They sure were.

I pulled over and the cop came up to my window and asked for my license and reg. He asked what were we doing down here.

My excuse was weak and he wasn't buying it, so he asked me to step out of my vehicle. He took me around back and started questioning me away from my friends.He just wanted me to admit we were cruising for SW's, which we weren't (I don't partake in those kind of Sp's). He threatened to give me some bogus tickets. Wanting to just get the ordeal over with and continue with our search, I finally caved and agreed to play his game.

This is where it gets funny.

I went back to my vehicle, and after a short time in his cruiser he returned with my license and reg. He told us the lady we were talking to probably had a $400 a day crack habit (no argument here). He continued to inform us that she charged $40 for her services. He asked us how many people she sees a day to feed her habit. 10 we replied.

He told us these women do not get days off either, so how many would that be in a year. 10 * 365 = 3650, to most people.

"3650," we answered.

"No," the scholar told us.

We recalculated, and sure enough, we came back to 3650 again. We informed him that our math was correct.

"No, it's 36,500," he replied.

We tried to correct him several times more but this guy wasn't going to listen. In his head, 10 * 365 = 36,500.

My friends wanted to argue some more with him, but seeing as it was my ass on the line, and I told them to shut up. He continued with some more lessons.

Apparently, according to one of Vancouver's finest, condoms only work 70% of the time. Can you imagine! Condom manufacturers would be out of business.

Anyways, we humored him, and he eventually let us drive off into the night.

We didn't find what we were looking for, I was to freaked to go back, but we ended up getting shitfaced and stoned.

The next night we found some really good E.

I guess the moral of the story is, don't take math lessons from the VPD.
 

hitrack

I'LL KILL YA ALL!!
Feb 25, 2003
3,881
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Surrey
Ahh the asshole of the city...... the used condoms floating free as birds in the gutter, the young entrepreneurs wanting you to invest in their get rich quick schemes out side of 7-11. The venders selling their white powder. The upholders of the law looking so fit and finished in their spit shined boots and Ford Crown Victorias. The lads who were making rather marry that evening staggering home to see if they can hit the bed nd not the floor. The lasses selling their wares to the highest bidder. The coffee flowing from 7-11 like black gold......as I shift into 3rd and ride off into the sunset of DT.
 
M

My Name is Mud

Hey Pussy420

Save your stories about drug procurement for another board.
 

HankQuinlan

I dont re Member
Sep 7, 2002
1,744
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victoria
My Name is Mud said:
Hey Pussy420

Save your stories about drug procurement for another board.
Hey, I find it more entertaining than many posts --- I don't see the rule that prohibits drug procurement stories.
 
M

My Name is Mud

Its a free country. Doesn't mean we need to agree and welcome everything that we read here. I, for one, could care less about some guy buying crack and e from some lotrack SW. One mans opinion.
 

Verb

Well-known member
Oct 20, 2003
1,300
43
48
SprINGFiELD
My Name is Mud said:
Hey Pussy420

Save your stories about drug procurement for another board.


My Name is Mud said:
Its a free country. Doesn't mean we need to agree and welcome everything that we read here. I, for one, could care less about some guy buying crack and e from some lotrack SW. One mans opinion.
thats right... its your opinion, but don't speak for everyone else on the board
 

Verb

Well-known member
Oct 20, 2003
1,300
43
48
SprINGFiELD
it worked for me when I use to smoke weed.

20 - 1 timbits = 19
19 - 1 timbits= 18
18 - 1 timbits= 17
17 - 1 timbits= 16
16 - 1 timbits= 15
15 - 1 timbits= 14
14 - 1 timbits= 13
13 - 1 timbits= 12
12 - 1 timbits= 11
11 - 1 timbits= 10
10 - 1 timbits= 9
9 - 1 timbits= 8
8 - 1 timbits= 7
7 - 1 timbits= 6
6 - 1 timbits= 5
5 - 1 timbits= 4
4 - 1 timbits= 3
3 - 1 timbits= 2
2 - 1 timbits= 1
1 - 1 timbits= AH Shit......... I need more fecking donuts dude.......
 

pussy420

New member
Jan 3, 2005
70
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0
MudGuy,

I didn't realize these message boards were limited to pooning experiences only. Maybe you should tell some of the other threads I see going here about your rule. Maybe start with the Tsunami threads, or the X-box one.

Guy, get real.

This newbie was just trying to share what he thought was a funny story about LE.

Oh, and it wasn't crack we were after, and I didn't buy anything from a SW. We were simply after directions.
 

dbrw42

New member
Jan 26, 2003
415
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pussy420 said:
Apparently, according to one of Vancouver's finest, condoms only work 70% of the time. Can you imagine! Condom manufacturers would be out of business.

I read an article once that most doctors privately figure that the 70% number is probably closer to the truth. The condom manufacturers proudly claim 95%-98% effectiveness, but that's in their labs, and they want people to buy their condoms so they're not going to admit anything less. And the health care industry is trying to convince people that condoms are going to stop the spread of STD's, so they're not going to say anything out loud that might make people question the effectiveness.
 

pussy420

New member
Jan 3, 2005
70
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0
Agreeing with homeless. As for dbrw42, maybe I should clarify. The cop in the story was telling us to read the box of condoms. He claimed the 70% effectiveness rate was printed directly on the box. From his math skills, I find it hard to believe that he even could read.

Well, maybe he could. He would have to to be able to read the menu at Tim Horton's.
 

Verb

Well-known member
Oct 20, 2003
1,300
43
48
SprINGFiELD
pussy420 said:


He told us these women do not get days off either, so how many would that be in a year. 10 * 365 = 3650, to most people.

"3650," we answered.

"No," the scholar told us.

We recalculated, and sure enough, we came back to 3650 again. We informed him that our math was correct.

"No, it's 36,500," he replied.

We tried to correct him several times more but this guy wasn't going to listen. In his head, 10 * 365 = 36,500.

I would of whipped out my calculator on my cell phone to shut him up....But thats just me
 

ironchef

Registered loser
Oct 27, 2003
130
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0
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huh??? if the cop was talking about a $400 per day habit....wouldn't it be $400 x 365 then????
 

bobk

New member
Feb 17, 2005
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0
ironchef said:
huh??? if the cop was talking about a $400 per day habit....wouldn't it be $400 x 365 then????



no he was talking about the number of trick a day to make the 400 a-day...if you read it again
 

mick_eight

Banned
Feb 21, 2005
1,198
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0
Like we would say in my younger days "I'd rather have a sister in a whore house then a brother in police force.
 

SeekSteadyRegSP

Active member
Feb 9, 2005
773
100
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in response

Firstly, the original posting here is very appropriate for this board. It is most certainly a description of a suspected pooner getting pulled over by the police on a downtown Vancouver street.

The truth behind the story he told the police doesn't matter, as he was merely driving around the track as many might do. Some here will be happy to understand that he didn't get hauled off to jail for simply appearing to have been pulling his car over to discuss business with a working girl.

Nowthen, it appears that some of us aren't exactly clear on what the effectiveness rate of a condom really means.

Condoms, first and foremost, are birth control, and the effectiveness rate of a condom against preventing pregnancy is somewhere up in the 95% range.

More importantly, that 95% number means 5 pregnancies per 100 (women) per year when condoms are used properly all the time.

The statement "Condoms are 70% effective", when used alone, is meaningless. Such a phrase must be followed by an explanation, either assumed or stated, at what particular prevention is in question.

Maybe condoms are 70% effective at preventing some obscure form of STD but common sense assures that they are much more effective when speaking of the main STDs that we need be concerned with, or of pregnancy.

The way this thread sounds, thank goodness that a working girl can go (somewhere else) and get instructions about just how to use a condom correctly.

Even if it were true that condoms are 70% effective in preventing the spread of genital herpes, that would be a reference that suggests that 3 in 10 partners of people with genital herpes would contract the STD during a year of regular sex with that infected person! (despite proper condom use during all sex sessions)

Consider that less than half (and perhaps a much smaller percentage) of working girls could be thought to have genital herpes, and considering that you're going to see the next girl probably once - ever - and maybe several times a year at most, her chances of transmitting genital herpes to you while condoms are used properly are extremely low!

Yes, it can happen. But there have been uneducated people on this board for years suggesting that "condoms don't protect against (genital) herpes" when nothing could be further from the truth.
 
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