LOL of the day

[badbadboy]

A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs. Three women, from England, Wales, and Scotland, were walking past and felt sorry for the poor man.

The English woman said "Have you ever had a hug?" The man said "No," so she gave him a hug and walked on.

The Welsh woman said, "Have you ever had a kiss?" The man said, "No," so she gave him a kiss and walked on.

The Scottish woman came to him and said, "'ave ya ever been fooked, laddie?" The man broke into a big smile and said, "No".

She said, "Aye, ya will be when the tide comes in."

 

[VanessaofBC]

^^^ Very, very, threatening!!!!!!!!

 

[Cami Parker]

This thread always makes me smile! Thanks for posting it Lovey, it's nice to see some lighthearted fun on here:thumb::clap2:

 

[VanessaofBC]

Todays random email came to me:

I hate double standards.


Some girl gets a vibrator and it's seen as a bit of naughty fun,
but when I ordered my 240Volt FuckMaster Pro5000 Japanese
blowup latex doll with 6 speed revolving pussy, elasticised anus with
imitation shit dribble and breast nipple discharge, non-drip semen
collection tray, together with built in realistic orgasm scream sound system......

I'm apparently a dirty fvcking pervert!

 

[Cami Parker]

Those darned double standards... They're just everywhere, aren't they!

Todays random email came to me:

 

[VanessaofBC]

Those darned double standards... They're just everywhere, aren't they!

Yeah, like why do WE have to wear a bra!?!?!?

 

[vancity_cowboy]

Yeah, like why do WE have to wear a bra!?!?!?

 

[VanessaofBC]

^^^^ Exactly what I mean.

Here is another funny one...

Heil Nothin'

 

[VanessaofBC]

You know EXACTLY what I mean (if you like that type of music anyway)

 

[PlayfulAlex]

Did I hear somebody say church? Oh yeah, it's Sunday!

God's Property: Stomp! Rap compliments of Salt (of Salt-N-Pepa)!

[Salt [rap]]: When I think about the goodness and fullness of God,
makes me thankful pity the hateful I'm grateful.
The Lord brought me through this far,
trying to be cute when I praise him raise 'em high.
I keep the live beat bumping. Keep it jumping make the Lord feel something.
Ain't no shame in my game God's Property. People's evil curse ain't no stoppin' me.
UH Stomp!

 

[VanessaofBC]

Did I hear somebody say church? Oh yeah, it's Sunday!

God's Property: Stomp! Rap compliments of Salt (of Salt-N-Pepa)!

I would refer to that as "GANGSTER-ISH" but that's okay!!!!

 

[PlayfulAlex]

I would refer to that as "GANGSTER-ISH" but that's okay!!!!

Oh, I see...so I'm just not gangsta enough for you, is that it?

 

[PlayfulAlex]

Custom Bling...now this is gangsta, baby!

 

[VanessaofBC]

TWENTY points.....

NO....watching ME sing it was GANGSTER-ISH - I just did that whole rap right here at home.......Oh YEAH. PFA!!!

HEY: If anyone can tell me the name of the street on the background of the Ellen videos, I will give you 20 POINTS!!!!

 

[VanessaofBC]

 

[VanessaofBC]

GOOD MORNING!

 

[Larry Storch]

OMG! You've been spying on me at work!

 

[PlayfulAlex]

I don't know if it's just the wine, but you guys are awesome tonight! I haven't had this many laughs in many a perb-day!

 

[VanessaofBC]

WTF!?!?!

 

[VanessaofBC]