Levity for the day....A Cinderella Story...

[Riddler Diddler]

A Cinderella Story...

Cinderella wants to go to the ball, but her wicked stepmother won't let her. As Cinderella sits crying in the garden, her Fairy Godmother appears and promises to provide Cinderella with everything she needs to go to the ball, but only on two conditions.

"First, you must wear a diaphragm" says the Fairy Godmother.

Cinderella agrees. "What's the second condition?" she asks.

"You must be home by 2 a.m. Any later, and your diaphragm will turn into a pumpkin." responds the Fairy Godmother.

Cinderella agrees to be home by 2 a.m.

The appointed hour comes and goes, and Cinderella doesn't show up. Finally, at 5 a.m., Cinderella shows up looking love-struck and very satisfied.

"Where have you been?" demands the Fairy Godmother. "Your diaphragm was supposed to turn into a pumpkin three hours ago!!!"

"I met a prince, Fairy Godmother. He took care of everything." replied Cinderella.

"I know of no prince with that kind of power! Tell me his name!" demanded the Fairy Godmother.

"I can't remember, exactly... Peter Peter, something or other..."
;-)

 

[Riddler Diddler]

Alexandria - thanks...here's one especially for you!

Snow White saw Pinocchio walking through the woods, so she ran up behind him, knocked him flat on his back, and then sat on his face crying, "Lie to me! Lie to me!"
;-)

 

[Riddler Diddler]

Alexandria - another one especially for you?

Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the woods when suddenly, the Big Bad Wolf jumped out from behind a tree and holding a machete to her throat, said, "Red, I'm going to screw your brains out!"

To that, Little Red Riding Hood calmly reached into her picnic basket and pulled out a .45 magnum and pointed it at him and said, "No you're not! You're going to eat me just like it says in the book!"
;-)

 

[Hit Man]

And God created woman, and she had 3 breasts.
He then asked the woman, "Is there anything you'd like to have
changed?"

She replied, "Yes, could get rid of this middle breast?" And so it
was done, and it was good. Then the woman exclaimed as she was
holding the third breast in her hand, "What can be done with this
useless boob?"
And God created man.

 

[Riddler Diddler]

More fairy tales....?

Pinocchio had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain about splinters whenever they had sex. Pinocchio, therefore, went to visit Gepetto to see if he could help.

Gepetto suggested he try a little sandpaper wherever indicated and Pinocchio skipped away enlightened.

A couple of weeks later, Gepetto saw Pinocchio bouncing happily through town and asked him, "How's the girlfriend?"

Pinocchio replied, "Who needs a girlfriend?"
;-)