Going in to a provider with a positive mindset vs a negative mindset?

[johnA27]

Well, lets face it, many of us go visit an SP because we are lonely, havent been able to catch a girlfriend for a while, and need to fill a void in our lives. Sometimes work is stressful, life is stressful, and you just go to an SP to blow off some steam. I mean, if we picked up girls like movie stars did, we probably wouldnt be visiting an SP, or a strip club.

Just wondering what is the better mindset? I've definitely gone to an SP, or a strip club, feeling lonely and lost, and just want to forget about life. Heck, even told a stripper to just hold me for a minute. Sometimes you feel so bad and just want a woman to hug and hold you.

Though I've definitely done the opposite too. I've felt mostly positive during my recent binge. I find that I tend to talk a bit less about my self or my troubles, and just enjoy the moment.

So what do you guys mostly do? Do you go in to fill a void in your life? Or do you call a lady because its Friday night and its fun time? And SPs, do you have much of a preference? Is it irritating if a client goes on and on about being lonely, unable to date, and just in general be pathetic? Or do you really care for some?

 

[UhOh]

Paying for someone's time because you feel lonely is sort of like smoking crack because you don't feel good. A temporary high follow by a feeling of being in an even bigger hole than you started with.
SP's are for fun. Loneliness should be treated by other means.

 

[johnsmit]

Yah I have to agree with the lonely.
That why I went to see certain ones. And that lead to a friend ship that kind of fills the loneliness. But I found out many of the girls I made friends with moved on ..I kind of got left back where I was ., a lone again .

Deffinetly when you find one girl that you can see easily I did see them often for just fun times. As long as I can afford it that is .

I too fell for a part time striper be for this hobby , that fill my loneliness .

But I also have to put it in perspective . My natural state is being a loner and I usually am OK being a lone .Even when I think it would be nice to have a relationship , I think more of a partner to share things with. Or to share other experience. But I still see us all as individually needing our own space to do the things we want to ..

I uess that is why I am attracted more to girls that are escorts , most are independent thinkers and don't want one depend on one guy. They can be a lone. And also have many aquanitance which they may have a excited and sex with . Personally I have no problem with a partner wanting or needing more sex then I do and easily accept that them going back and having relationships with old sex partners is only natural.after all they were doing it with them many time long before I cam a long .

 

[badbadboy]

I think going to see a provider while having a negative mindset is a waste of money.

There is only so much these women can do to provide an excellent service.

I like a positive experience even more of those seratonins boosting afterwards.

 

[EuroSZabina]

Paying for someone's time because you feel lonely is sort of like smoking crack because you don't feel good. A temporary high follow by a feeling of being in an even bigger hole than you started with.
SP's are for fun. Loneliness should be treated by other means.

Very well said my dharlin
Oh my goodness, I feel so bad for the OP, it's not a good thinking at all. I love being alone most of the time yet I don't feel lonely.
I do so many things everyday, outdoor activities, and if it's raining I go to my gym more often or go to a spa, my new fav is the floating spa.
Omg, I love my life so much, I hug myself everyday and I love love love being alone.
I have so many friends and guys around me if I want to I will go out in my own time.

 

[Dick Ford]

Like most things, the more you put in, the more you'll get out of the experience. That means being generous and respectful, but it also means being enthusiastic, too. It still takes two to tango.

 

[johnA27]

Very well said my dharlin
Oh my goodness, I feel so bad for the OP, it's not a good thinking at all. I love being alone most of the time yet I don't feel lonely.
I do so many things everyday, outdoor activities, and if it's raining I go to my gym more often or go to a spa, my new fav is the floating spa.
Omg, I love my life so much, I hug myself everyday and I love love love being alone.
I have so many friends and guys around me if I want to I will go out in my own time.

No need to feel bad. Like I said I went into my recent binge with positive thinking and I felt quite good after.

 

[MRGREEN]

It's all impermanent... the good times. the bad times, and our time.... things change constantly, we change constantly...... acceptance of this idea is very freeing.

Peace
MG

 

[VanIsleGuy46]

My motivation for visiting SPs is for the spice, variety and excitement! If you are looking for accompaniment perhaps volunteer at a retirement home/society or become a Big Brother. Helping others less fortunate will generally be far more rewarding than spending an hour with somebody that is working.

 

[Lady Companion]

I think that you should see a lady for whatever reason serves you best. We are here to be genuine, open and accepting in all we do. I love bringing pleasure, joy and deeper meaning to your life, beyond what you can do yourself in the shower.

Yes the physical is always wonderful, but I believe one of the main differences between an escort and a courtesan is what we provide. An escort provides mainly a physical service, hopefully with a positive attitude, and you feel physically relaxed and rejuvenated.

A courtesan provides a more holistic experience, aimed at allowing you to really be yourself, accepting that unconditionally, and really showing you and making you feel how special you are - well beyond the physical. Sometimes it's just about holding space for you. Sometimes it's about listening. And sometimes it's about providing direct encouragement or solutions. But it is always about supporting you in becoming the best version of yourself.

It's not just about making you feel good for a few hours or days. It's about allowing you to fully realize how awesome you actually are, and then you take that with you in other areas of your life.

I love making people feel great in all capacities. Being lonely at times is a part of being human. Having sex may make you feel better for a short period. But finding a safe place to connect deeply and authentically with another person - and most importantly with yourself - is what really heals the soul. That is where the magic is.

One of my degrees is in clinical psychology, yet I can honestly say that the more personal touch of a courtesan brings guards down much more quickly, and in my opinion has the ability to transform and heal more fully than can usually be accomplished in a clinical setting. I absolutely believe that psychologists, therapists councilors of all kinds provide an incredible and needed service. However, I really don't think we should be ridiculing those who visit a companion as part of their personal transformation.

 

[High Roller]

Whatever suits you best. But, if you go in with a negative mindset, be sure to tell her and to say you want your GFE to help you blow off some steam (so to speak).

I remember reading of one study where the strippers were interviewed as to the kind of guy that went in, and, to the surprise of the researchers, the customers were men who just wanted to talk to a good-looking woman, in confidence. So, yes, I do think that courtesans offer an essential service.

 

[UhOh]

Very well said my dharlin
Oh my goodness, I feel so bad for the OP, it's not a good thinking at all. I love being alone most of the time yet I don't feel lonely.
I do so many things everyday, outdoor activities, and if it's raining I go to my gym more often or go to a spa, my new fav is the floating spa.
Omg, I love my life so much, I hug myself everyday and I love love love being alone.
I have so many friends and guys around me if I want to I will go out in my own time.

Thanks for sharing. I wish I was more like that.

 

[theimp]

I think that you should see a lady for whatever reason serves you best. We are here to be genuine, open and accepting in all we do. I love bringing pleasure, joy and deeper meaning to your life, beyond what you can do yourself in the shower.

Yes the physical is always wonderful, but I believe one of the main differences between an escort and a courtesan is what we provide. An escort provides mainly a physical service, hopefully with a positive attitude, and you feel physically relaxed and rejuvenated.

A courtesan provides a more holistic experience, aimed at allowing you to really be yourself, accepting that unconditionally, and really showing you and making you feel how special you are - well beyond the physical. Sometimes it's just about holding space for you. Sometimes it's about listening. And sometimes it's about providing direct encouragement or solutions. But it is always about supporting you in becoming the best version of yourself.

It's not just about making you feel good for a few hours or days. It's about allowing you to fully realize how awesome you actually are, and then you take that with you in other areas of your life.

I love making people feel great in all capacities. Being lonely at times is a part of being human. Having sex may make you feel better for a short period. But finding a safe place to connect deeply and authentically with another person - and most importantly with yourself - is what really heals the soul. That is where the magic is.

One of my degrees is in clinical psychology, yet I can honestly say that the more personal touch of a courtesan brings guards down much more quickly, and in my opinion has the ability to transform and heal more fully than can usually be accomplished in a clinical setting. I absolutely believe that psychologists, therapists councilors of all kinds provide an incredible and needed service. However, I really don't think we should be ridiculing those who visit a companion as part of their personal transformation.

This. I love this response. So much that this is my first post.
I am just an old hippie at heart. I even spent a few of my formative years on a commune, and this touched that part of me. My dear, you may have one of the sexiest brains on the planet.

 

[johnA27]

I think that you should see a lady for whatever reason serves you best. We are here to be genuine, open and accepting in all we do. I love bringing pleasure, joy and deeper meaning to your life, beyond what you can do yourself in the shower.

Yes the physical is always wonderful, but I believe one of the main differences between an escort and a courtesan is what we provide. An escort provides mainly a physical service, hopefully with a positive attitude, and you feel physically relaxed and rejuvenated.

A courtesan provides a more holistic experience, aimed at allowing you to really be yourself, accepting that unconditionally, and really showing you and making you feel how special you are - well beyond the physical. Sometimes it's just about holding space for you. Sometimes it's about listening. And sometimes it's about providing direct encouragement or solutions. But it is always about supporting you in becoming the best version of yourself.

It's not just about making you feel good for a few hours or days. It's about allowing you to fully realize how awesome you actually are, and then you take that with you in other areas of your life.

I love making people feel great in all capacities. Being lonely at times is a part of being human. Having sex may make you feel better for a short period. But finding a safe place to connect deeply and authentically with another person - and most importantly with yourself - is what really heals the soul. That is where the magic is.

One of my degrees is in clinical psychology, yet I can honestly say that the more personal touch of a courtesan brings guards down much more quickly, and in my opinion has the ability to transform and heal more fully than can usually be accomplished in a clinical setting. I absolutely believe that psychologists, therapists councilors of all kinds provide an incredible and needed service. However, I really don't think we should be ridiculing those who visit a companion as part of their personal transformation.

That really actually is beautifully put. If I wanted to see a lady in Vancouver, you're probably the top of the list for me to see.

I guess SPs are human, so each interaction will be different. Its just sometimes you do look to fill a void, and you come out feeling much emptier than even before you went in. I wonder what could've been different in the interaction to help.

I guess there's the nights when I go to a strip club like The 5 or Paramount, and sit forever waiting for a lady to be interested in talking, because I just want to talk to a pretty lady, I dont even care if there's a lap dance or not. And yet, sometimes I wait forever and nobody comes. I am sure many people would wish to just skip the bs, and go straight to the fun too (the lap dance).

I wonder how many people go to SPs for just a therapeutic session. Like much more on the talking, cuddling, hugging, and not so much on the sex.

 

[felixthecat]

Like much more on the talking, cuddling, hugging, and not so much on the sex.

It sounds like cuddleup.com may offer what you are looking for.

 

[resercher]

Well, lets face it, many of us go visit an SP because we are lonely, havent been able to catch a girlfriend for a while, and need to fill a void in our lives. Sometimes work is stressful, life is stressful, and you just go to an SP to blow off some steam. I mean, if we picked up girls like movie stars did, we probably wouldnt be visiting an SP, or a strip club.

Just wondering what is the better mindset? I've definitely gone to an SP, or a strip club, feeling lonely and lost, and just want to forget about life. Heck, even told a stripper to just hold me for a minute. Sometimes you feel so bad and just want a woman to hug and hold you.

Though I've definitely done the opposite too. I've felt mostly positive during my recent binge. I find that I tend to talk a bit less about my self or my troubles, and just enjoy the moment.

So what do you guys mostly do? Do you go in to fill a void in your life? Or do you call a lady because its Friday night and its fun time? And SPs, do you have much of a preference? Is it irritating if a client goes on and on about being lonely, unable to date, and just in general be pathetic? Or do you really care for some?

The this thread shoud be called do you see sp becase you are lonely.

Here is how I look at seeing sp's

What I am about to type maybe should be in a separate thread called who is your fictional role model for a pooner . In every day normal straight society there are very few positive male role models for men who see prostitutes but . The scene I always think of in the back of my mind is from the film henry and June.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0099762/

About the life of Anais Nin. Where Henry borrows some cash from Anais and she sees him use it for a prostitute . The thing I like about that scene is there is no" Oh my god you caught me" Reaction from Henry The actor projects a sort of matter of fact sort of energy . As if she had seen him going to the store to pick up milk or whatever . He looks at her as if to say yes this is what I am going to do with your money deal with it .This is the type of person I am.
Usually when I go to see an escort prostitute or whatever term you want to use. I will try to have a specific idea in mind as to what I want to do . Something I think is a good idea for all pooners to have.
I saw one prostitute and she was great . I purposely however decided not to see her again. As I did not want to develop feelings other than sexual ones for her .

To use a Metaphor going to the prostitute is like seeing a really good movie If you get good service etc. But trying to use her as your personal Psychiatrists It is like seeing the movie over and over again and purchasing all the various figurines and paraphernalia from that move . In effect what your trying to do is fill a hole in your life with something other than what you are. I think this is not a good thing As there are women out there who are experts at take advantage of this Emotion in people . Not that I don't try to fill my life with something other than myself to some extent we all do. I would say the best thing to do is accept that you are alone and try to be at peace with the situation your in at the moment .
When the prostitue asked me when I would be back again what I told her is that I would not want to see her very often as It would kill the magic . I would talk that but this text is already to long. so I am stopping here.

 

[paprides]

Interesting and provocative thread, my thanks for these interesting contributions.

I couldn't help thinking that dealing with "alone," and loneliness can be a lifetime task. Another thought dropped into my head, along the lines of "perhaps happiness is found by being comfortable in one own's skin before getting into someone else's skin."

Either way, temporary enjoyment with thrilling company followed by mellow or contemplative reflection is a relatively natural experience. Doesn't any thrill seeker find highs and lows between tapping the adrenalin source with whatever it is that makes them tingle?

Highs and lows in life can be a catalyst to creative thinking or the planning and execution of future adventures.

The journey, including dark, cold along with warm and comfortable, can be enjoyed at any stage of the trip.